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Kev likes the Gallaghers. The whole crew of them. Even Frank sometimes. Yeah, they get under his skin. That just makes them even more like family. Ian though, Ian's a good kid. Even if he's stressing Fiona out right now with the way he's acting kind of like Monica.
The Milkoviches, though, Kev didn't always like them. He still isn't a fan of most of them but Mickey's grown on him. Kind of like a really small fungus that actually thought he had everybody fooled about not being really gay. Please. Kev called that one a long time ago even if no one believes him when he says it now.
Mostly Kev thinks he likes Mickey when he's with Ian. They're kind of like him and V. Meant to be, no matter how much shit gets in their way. All the crap they've been through and they still show up together at The Alibi Room with their arms around each other's shoulders laughing about something that's no one's business but theirs. Even when Kev doesn't get dragged into the middle of it he likes watching them figuring out how to fit into each others' space. It kinda makes him miss those early days with him and V. Not that he doesn't like where they're at now, and being a daddy, but man. That early stuff, that's the kind of stuff that you tell your kids about someday. The PG parts of it at least.
Ian's sitting at the bar by himself right now. Mickey came in with him, but he headed out the back after he ordered his drink. He said it was to take care of some business; Ian doesn't look jumpy or anything so Kev figures it's not a big deal, and he'd rather not know about it anyway.
The regulars are all in, and a couple of guys that aren't so regular, but they aren't new either. Guys that Kev's seen around the neighborhood before but that must have a different regular watering hole. He should probably go talk to them and stuff, try to convince them that they oughta come back more often, but Kev kinda likes the way it normally is. Maybe they could be more profitable, but everyone there's kind of like a friend when it's just the regulars. The only kind of shit any of them give anybody is the kind that's meant as a joke, especially now that Terry Milkovich is locked up again.
"--Milkovich." That's one of the guys that Kev doesn't completely know. He tries not to be obvious about the fact that he's listening now.
Ian doesn't even try. He swivels on his stool slowly. Before he gets all the way turned around Kev sees the smile on his face. It doesn't look like Ian's normal smile. It looks a little cuckoo, if Kev's being honest. "Which one?"
The guys probably aren't expecting anybody to chime in. They look up from their drinks anyway. The one that'd been talking, a chubby little guy with a pedo 'stache, must not know who Ian is. Or, if he does know him, it's just that he's one of the Gallaghers and he has no idea why he cares about which Milkovich they're talking about.
Kev should maybe warn him.
Too late.
Pedo 'stache leans back in his chair to look at Ian. "All of 'em. They're all worthless. Dad's a junkyard dog, those older boys are dumb as rocks, and the little one..."
Ian's leaning in closer. "What about him?"
Kev draws his hand across his throat, hard and fast as he can, over and over. No, nope, abandon ship, come on, guys. "Mickey's the best, right, guys? A real brainy guy. He has some great ideas." Come on, clue in, Kev's not just saying this stuff to hear himself talk.
"Ha!" Nope. Pedo 'stache isn't clueing in. He looks around at his buddies; some of them are snickering already. None of them seems to realize that what their friend is doing is a really, really bad idea. "If you can call someone stupid enough to knock up a damn hooker brainy, you gotta be dumber than a Milkovich."
Hey. That kinda hurts. Kev stops with the drawing a hand across his throat. You know what? He's tried. He's done his best. They deserve whatever they get now.
"So what were you gonna say about Mickey?" Ian hasn't left his stool yet, but Kev can't be the only one that can tell that he's about to jump up swinging if he doesn't like the answer.
Most of the regulars have stopped drinking and started watching now. Tommy meets Kev's eyes and shakes his head. Yeah, that's about how Kev's feeling about it too. This guy is determined to commit Gallagher assisted suicide and Kev's pretty sure there isn't a guy in the place that's gonna stop him. Maybe none of them like Mickey Milkovich, but he's part of the family now too. Just like the Gallaghers.
"He's a greasy little fuck, that's what. Can't trust that shithead as far as I can throw him. Gonna end up just like his dad, just less--"
Whatever else he was gonna say, or does say, Kev doesn't hear it over the sound of Ian getting up fast enough that it sends the bar stool sliding. "You wanna say that again?" Maybe Kev can't see his face but he can picture it. Ian always juts that chin out when he's daring someone to start something with him. He has his fists clenched, the muscles in his arms tense enough that Kev can see them from where he's standing.
Pedo 'stache is standing up now too. "Yeah, I said he's--"
Ian grabs the bar stool and starts to lunge across the room toward the guy's table, pulling the stool back. He's gonna get a really good hit with that, when he takes his swing.
Actually, Kev's a little disappointed when Mickey pops up behind Ian from outta nowhere and grabs him by the arms. "Slow the fuck down, slugger, the fuck's goin' on?" He doesn't even act like he's afraid of that bar stool hitting him. It's not like Ian could know who it is that's behind him.
Except maybe he does. Maybe all it takes is Mickey's voice to get through being pissed off. He leans back into him, just for a second, before he's pulling against Mickey's grip again. "This asshole said--"
"Why the fuck would I care about this piece of shit?" That's not the old Mickey either. The old Mickey woulda looked for any excuse to land a punch. It hasn't been long enough that Kev's forgotten that.
"He said you--"
"Don't fuckin' care, tough guy. Put the fuckin' stool down." Mickey's still holding on to Ian. Kev's pretty sure that Ian can get loose if he really wants to; he's still bigger than Mickey, even if Mickey's a tough little fuck. Ian's gotta be able to overpower him if he really wants to.
That must mean he doesn't really want to. He eases back against Mickey a little more. Slowly, he lowers the stool back to the floor. Mickey doesn't let go until Ian's hands are completely off of it. Then, he gives Ian's arms a squeeze and lets his hands fall back down to his sides.
Everyone's about to go back to their drinks. Kev breathes out a breath he hasn't even known that he's been holding this whole time. Not that he'd have really minded if Ian got a good punch in. It's still a good thing that he doesn't have to explain this one to V and Fiona. Especially when he'd also have to explain that it's over Mickey Milkovich.
Then pedo 'stache mutters under his breath when it's still not quite noisy enough again for the normal bar sounds to cover it up. "Fuckin' psycho bitch."
Mickey freezes. "The fuck did you call him?"
Not that he gives the guy a chance to answer before he's stepping around Ian and taking a swing.
Pedo 'stache staggers but he catches himself on the table before he can go down. His buddies are getting up now too, but Mickey's already pulling back to take another swing at him. "I said the fuck did you call him, bitch? Better not be what I fuckin' thought I heard."
Maybe someone should tell Mickey that it's a good idea to give someone a chance to answer before you punch them in the face, because that's twice that he's done it. It's not going to be Kev though. He likes his face just the way it is, not rearranged by a Milkovich.
Ian's laughing now, loud and happy, and diving in right beside Mickey. Kev's pretty sure he hears Ian's voice shouting something about "boyfriend" above all the normal fight yelling. Huh, he hasn't heard them use labels before. Good to know that they're at that point. It's a good point. He remembers the first time he heard V call him her boyfriend. It made him feel like he'd won first place in life.
The regulars aren't moving from their spots at the bar. Tommy's glass is empty; Kev pours him another and slides it across the smooth wood surface.
Kermit sounds more curious than worried when he asks Kev, "Should you do something about that?"
Kev takes one more look at the fight breaking out in his bar. Ian headbutts one of pedo 'stache's friends while he's watching. "Nah, they've got it." Those guys don't stand a chance against a Gallagher and a Milkovich. "Besides. It's kind of sweet, isn't it?" Look at those two, willing to take on the whole world for each other.
This is definitely the kind of stuff that they're going to tell their kids about.