Chapter Text
Anxiety had been extra difficult lately. He spent most of his time curled up knees to chest on the couch in the common room, growling at anyone who would try to speak to him. He didn’t move from that spot, and he had even been slacking on his job. Thomas had been surprisingly anxiety free for the last few days.
“I’m worried about him,” Patton whispered to the other two sides as they poked their heads around the hallway wall, staring at Anxiety scrolling through his phone. “He’s been like this for days.”
Logan adjusted his glasses, “it’s Anxiety. Him being antisocial is not unusual behavior.”
“Well, yeah but he’s usually more, Anxiety than he’s being. It’s just different! He isn’t even saying anything mean lately, he just… growls.” Patton shrugged, “I mean, I like dogs but that’s just a bit much!”
“I suppose that his lack of sarcasm and dark humor is slightly abnormal. Perhaps we should be slightly worried.” Logan sighed and turned to Roman, “You should speak to him.”
“Me! Why?” Roman exclaimed, causing the others to shush him and pull him back into the hallway. “We are mortal enemies!”
“Precisely. If he lashes out at you, it changes nothing,” Logan said. “It is clearly the most logical solution.”
“Yes! And then he won’t growl at me! But this is really making me want a dog…” Patton inhaled with excitement and poked Logan in the shoulder, “can we get a dog after this?”
“No.”
“Do I really have to be the one to speak with him?” Roman groaned.
“Yes.”
--
It was late enough that everyone had gone to bed, or so Anxiety thought. He was still curled in a ball on the couch, resting his chin on his knees with his earbuds in. For once, he wasn’t actually listening to music. His playlist had ended a while ago and he couldn’t be bothered to change it.
He ran his hands through his hair and sighed. He was just glad to finally be alone, the others had been lingering around him all day. Normally he would be hiding in his room, but that just wasn’t going to happen any time soon. With the silence in his ears, he was surprised to hear the creaking of floorboards behind him. He whirled around to see Roman staring at him with a hesitant look on his face. Anxiety growled.
Roman sighed. “Stop that, it’s unbecoming.” He walked around the couch and sat down next to Anxiety, who scooted closer to the edge and scowled. “The others have decided me to be the one to confront you, despite me telling them that you are my nemesis. So let’s make this as short as possible. What is wrong with you lately?”
Anxiety glared at him, “What do you care?”
“I don’t. But as the Prince of this mind palace, it is my job to keep everything in order.” Roman puffed his chest out and gestured wildly to the space around him, eliciting a snicker from the other boy. Roman glared back at him.
“Whatever, Princey.” He grabbed his phone and started another song, far louder than he should have right in his ears, but he didn’t care. He just wanted Roman to leave him alone. Unfortunately, it was clear that wasn’t going to happen as the earbuds were pulled from his ears. “Ow! What the hell? Give them back.”
“Take them then. Or tell me what’s wrong. It’s up to you, Grumpy.” Roman dangled the earbuds in front of Anxiety’s face, but he just flipped his hood up and looked away, shielding his face with his bangs. Roman sighed, it was unusual for Anxiety not to fight back. Something was definitely wrong. He had to find out what, but there was no way that he would tell him without a fight. This was way more trouble than it was worth, Logan and Patton were going to hear from him tomorrow.
He thought for a moment about how he was going to make this happen. As Thomas’s creativity it really shouldn’t be this difficult, but he didn’t know Anxiety very well. He twirled the earbuds in his hands, staring at him in hopes that he would just open up and say it. Anxiety seemed to be sinking more and more into the couch the longer that he stayed. Why didn’t he just leave? Normally whenever people would sit next to him he would get up and storm off into his room, grumbling about personal space. What was so different now?
His eyes followed the earbuds cord down and into the pocket of Anxiety’s hoodie, and an idea struck him. With the speed of a good knight, Roman tugged the cord and grabbed the phone out of his pocket. “You’re off your guard today aren’t you, Anxiety?” He teased, quickly going to the photos app.
Anxiety’s entire body tensed. “Give that back, now.”
“Let’s just see what we have here.” He tapped the first picture, putting a Myspace style selfie onto the screen. The black and white filter accentuated the darkness under his eyes and his lips had a slight pout. Roman knew that he was being cruel, Anxiety was highly protective over his phone, but he wasn’t fighting for it, and that was highly suspicious.
“I will kill you, bring you back, and kill you again.” Anxiety was shaking, his entire body bristling with rage. But even so, he was barely moving.
Roman scrolled to the next photo and burst out laughing. Anxiety was standing wearing his hoodie and no shirt in front of a mirror, one hand holding the phone and the other gripping the zipper of his hoodie. Before he could examine the photo any further, Anxiety had pulled the phone out of his hands. Roman’s laughter was cut short when he saw that Anxiety was now curled up even tighter, groaning in pain. His phone was clutched so tightly in his hand that his knuckles were turning white. Roman hesitated, “...Anxiety? What’s wrong?”
Anxiety just buried his head his arms.
“Okay, this has gone far enough. You need to tell me, now.” Roman put a hand on his arm and leaned forward in an attempt to make eye contact. “Please.”
Anxiety sighed, there was no way he could avoid it now. He would just get his phone taken again and he did not want Roman scrolling through any more of his pictures. “My back.”
“What about it?”
He groaned loudly and grabbed handfuls of his hair. “I fell asleep sitting like this, and now I can’t move.”
“Wait, and you’ve been like this for days?” Roman leaned back. They were just in Thomas’s head, so they didn’t have to eat, go to the bathroom, or anything like that, but it had become habitual for most of them (except Logan, who didn’t see the point). But to be stuck in one place for days, barely moving at all would be miserable. Roman just wondered why he had never asked for help. But then again, it was Anxiety and he was never known to ask for anything, let alone help.
“Yes. Happy? Now leave me alone.” Anxiety put his earbuds back in and turned his music up even louder than it had been before. After a few moments of silence from the other side of the couch, he thought that Roman might actually leave him alone. Of course, he couldn’t be that lucky. Not after everything else that he had to deal with. He felt Roman place his hand on his back. Anxiety ripped his earbuds out again, “No. No way! Do not.”
“You don’t have a choice. I will not have you sitting in here, in pain, and lashing out at everybody because of it any longer. Now just be quiet and let me do this.” Roman began massaging Anxiety’s back, right between his shoulder blades. This was weird and uncomfortable for both of them. While they didn’t exactly hate each other, they didn’t like each other. And they were definitely not friends. But even so, Roman couldn’t just ignore someone who needed help. He was too chivalrous for that, even when it was Anxiety who needed the help.
Anxiety groaned in frustration again. He was never one for physical contact. He didn’t hate it exactly, but he wasn’t close enough with anyone to make it comfortable. Contact makes people more vulnerable, and if there was one thing that Anxiety hated most it was being vulnerable. But he had to admit that after days of being stuck on the couch unable to move, it felt quite nice to have someone working the tension out of his muscles. He didn’t exactly approve, but he definitely didn’t want it to stop.
They sat like that for a while, with Roman massaging his back, neck, and shoulders in silence. They both knew that speaking would end the moment, and as much as both of them didn’t want to admit it to themselves, it was nice to not be fighting. And it was nice to be close to someone for once. Roman felt as Anxiety’s muscles started to relax, and he watched him slowly begin to stretch his body out more and more. Eventually he was actually sitting on the couch like a normal person with his feet on the ground, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees to still allow access to his back.
Even though his body posture was more open, Anxiety still hid his face in his hands, avoiding eye contact. But Roman didn’t take it for granted. Anxiety never let anyone touch him, let alone so intimately. Not that they were being intimate in any way. But it was nice to see him not shrinking away from any kind of contact. Roman began to notice how content he actually was just sitting in silence with him, until Anxiety stood up suddenly, wincing. “Stop.”
Roman put his hands up in defence and surprise. “What did I do?”
Anxiety stood in front of him, still a bit folded in on himself and not making any eye contact. “It’s better now.”
“It doesn’t look better, you still look cramped.” Roman stood up, unsure of what to do next.
“It’s okay, I can get to my bedroom now. I’m fine.” His bangs were hiding his eyes, but Roman could still see the dark bags under them. He was pleased to notice that they looked a little less dark. He stayed silent as Anxiety turned away from him and slowly made his way towards the hallway until he suddenly stopped. Without turning around, Anxiety muttered a quiet “Thank you.” It was so quiet that Roman almost couldn’t hear it, but it made a smile spread across his face.
“I still don’t like you.” Roman said to his back, with his smile coming through in his voice.
“Well, the feeling’s mutual, Disney boy.” Anxiety retreated to his bedroom.
--
After that day, Anxiety didn’t growl at anyone in the common room as long as they didn’t get too close. But to Patton and Logan’s surprise, Roman was able to sit next to him without a word. They still weren’t exactly friendly, but personal space was less of an issue. They never spoke of it again, and they were a little bit nicer to each other… just a little bit.