Chapter Text
Fukurodani Group
da1
uhm, so how about that next training camp?
komiyan
yeah we kinda still don't have a date
Ennoshita
this was supposed to be decided months ago
how do we still not have a date
broccoli
we WOULD, if SOMEONE hadn't fucked up with his school board.
bokh00to
I SWEAR IM SORRY
Akaashi Keiji
He says, while running off when the principal so much as looks in our direction
nyakkun
you're going to ruin nationals at this rate ...
#1 nerd
were talking bout it in the cap chat dw
and which of u assholes changed my name again
applepi
ha
Akaashi Keiji
You have a captain chat?
Ennoshita
let's make our own captain chat Akaashi
bokh00to
BUT YOURE NOT CAPTAINS
Akaashi Keiji
Yet
Let's do it. Can't be worse than this one.
da1
that's fair
#1 nerd
the disrespect
New Conversation
Ennoshita added Akaashi Keiji
Akaashi Keiji
Do you hear that?
Ennoshita
hear what
Akaashi Keiji
Silence.
Ennoshita
ah yes my favourite sound
Akaashi Keiji changed the name of the conversation to Silence.
Ennoshita
a bit too silent maybe
should we add someone?
Akaashi Keiji
As long as they're not too much trouble, fine
How about
Ennoshita
?
Akaashi Keiji
I was about to name Nekoma's next captain until I remembered I have no idea who it's going to be
Yamamoto?
Ennoshita
I thought Kenma
Akaashi Keiji
Kozume? As captain?
Ennoshita
yeah good point
Fukunaga then?
Akaashi Keiji
I don't know.
Let's skip Nekoma for now
Are there any teams from Miyagi you want in?
Ennoshita
uuuuuuuuuuh
I mean maybe
but they're all a bit ...
well.
Akaashi Keiji
I'm not sure if I want you to elaborate
Ennoshita
I guess if this is a captain chat we do need captains
and if we only talk about volleyball-related things it could be practical to have more people ...
should I?
Akaashi Keiji
Surprise me.
Ennoshita
okay but don't say I didn't warn you
Ennoshita added Yahabae, YUUJI NO CHANGE, shirabae
shirabae
what is this
Ennoshita
a captain chat
Yahabae
? We're not captains?
Akaashi Keiji
Yet
YUUJI NO CHANGE
im a captain!!
Ennoshita
no
shirabae
why is your username a fucking Love Live reference
Yahabae
Why did you recognise it as a Love Live reference?
YUUJI NO CHANGE
huh what am i then
Ennoshita
a disappointment
Yahabae
A disappointment.
Oh, great minds think alike.
Ennoshita
no
YUUJI NO CHANGE
enNOshita whyy
Akaashi Keiji
I'm so confused
shirabae
who are you even
I think I've seen you before but idk where
Ennoshita
nationals, probably
Akaashi Keiji
I'm Fukurodani's setter.
YUUJI NO CHANGE
ooooooooooooooooooooo
the pretty one
im terushima yuuji from johzenji nice 2 meet u
shirabae
'nice 2 meet u'
thanks I remember you now
I'm Shiratorizawa's setter Shirabu Kenjirou
Yahabae
I'm Yahaba Shigeru, setter from Seijoh.
Ennoshita
hold on a second
I didn't want to do this but there are too many setters here and I need to even it out
Ennoshita added futa futa night fever
shirabae
and now a vocaloid reference. spectacular
Yahabae
Seriously, you're a hypocrite.
shirabae
shove it creampuff boy
futa futa night fever
hi
are we just gonna ignore yahashira's matching usernames or
Ennoshita
Yahashira ..........
YUUJI NO CHANGE
#ishipit
shirabae
oh god wtf please no
shirabae changed their name to no
Yahabae changed their name to no
futa futa night fever
sgfhfagjsjfhbfkdhkggkfjgfjhgjhfhh
YUUJI NO CHANGE
F A T E
no
I hate all of you.
no changed their name to Yahaba
no
I win
as is tradition
Akaashi Keiji
I'm not sure if I follow
futa futa night fever
who are you
and is that you on your profile picture because damn
Akaashi Keiji
Don't even try.
futa futa night fever
alright
YUUJI NO CHANGE
why nooot
u have a bf or what?
Akaashi Keiji
If I say yes, will you stop
YUUJI NO CHANGE
oooooo u do?
Akaashi Keiji
No, I just want you to stop
Ennoshita
leave Akaashi alone his life is hard enough
@Futakuchi he's Fukurodani's setter
@Akaashi that annoying guy is Datekou's captain who can consider himself very lucky he's here in the first place
no
you literally only put him in because you were salty that there were more setters than spikers
futa futa night fever
uhm whAT?? the bETRAYAL
I thought you loved me
Ennoshita
fake news
futa futa night fever
*ALTERNATIVE FACTS
Yahaba
Nobody will ever love you, Futakuchi. Tolerate you, maybe, if you stop being so ... You.
no
funny I was about to say the same thing to you
YUUJI NO CHANGE
y do you hate each other so much? ur the same guy with different haircuts
no
uhm wtf no
Yahaba
^ Exhibit A, I have friends.
Akaashi Keiji
Questionable
Yahaba
YOU LITERALLY DON'T EVEN KNOW ME.
Akaashi Keiji
Don't need to.
futa futa night fever
pffffffffff
srsly please go out with me
YUUJI NO CHANGE
i saw him first? bitch
futa futa night fever
we can share
Akaashi Keiji
Ennoshita, please fake-date me so they'll shut up
Ennoshita
got it
babe
YUUJI NO CHANGE
????? how could u
lets at least go on a date???
Akaashi Keiji
Sorry, I have a boyfriend
no
I can't decide if I love or hate you
Akaashi Keiji
Would your 'loving me' include trying to hit on me?
futa futa night fever
nah shirab's got his hands full with that pinch server guy
what's his name
no
FOR THE LAST TIME SEMI AND I ARE NOT A THING
Yahaba
Ooooh, all caps, you're onto something!
no
yeah my nerves
why is everyone so obsessed with that
after the last practice match I got so much shit on social media
even if we were a thing which we aren't why would it be your business
Ennoshita
it's the most interesting thing about Shiratorizawa
Akaashi Keiji
That's not saying much
YUUJI NO CHANGE
WRONG
the most interesting thing about srtrzw is that they have horses
Yahaba
They do?
no
yes
futa futa night fever
full offense but with this chat layout that just looked like a selection screen from a video game with the cursor on 'no'
Yahaba
That's ... Awfully specific.
Akaashi Keiji
We have horses too.
Ennoshita
wait seriously?
YUUJI NO CHANGE
shouldnt u know that
as his bf
no
why would that let him know about the horses wtf
futa futa night fever
a relationship can't be built on secrets and lies
Yahaba
Look who's talking.
futa futa night fever
that was ONE TIME
and I APOLOGISED
Ennoshita
are you implying you have a relationship built on secrets and lies
with each other
no
ew
Yahaba
Nope.
Buuut there are some things I know that Futa-chan here wouldn't want to be public ...
futa futa night fever
'futa-chan'
not sure if I should be honoured
Ennoshita
who are you, Oikawa
YUUJI NO CHANGE
IS FUTA DATING OIKAWA??
no
how did you even jump to that conclusion
futa futa night fever
lol never
I still have /some/ sense of integrity
just a little
Yahaba
what the fuck are you implying about my captain you bitch
Akaashi Keiji
You probably shouldn't have said that
Ennoshita
there goes the perfect grammar
now you and Shirabu really sound the same
Yahaba
talk shit about your own teammates or other people in this chat but if you say one (1) bad word about oikawa i will serve into your face in the next match
YUUJI NO CHANGE
ooo kinky
Yahaba
and don't even get me started on you
Akaashi Keiji
Who is this Oikawa person and how in love with them are you
Yahaba
seijoh's captain
and that doesn't matter
YUUJI NO CHANGE
HOLY SHIT KAASH
U GOT HIM
no
I think this is even more disgusting
dating your captain would be weird
Ennoshita
didn't you literally join Shiratorizawa because you were gay for Ushiwaka
futa futa night fever
we're exposing them left and right
Yahaba
futakuchi kenji i will leak all of my receipts to all of my contacts if you ever group me with shirabu again
no
that wasn't it
I admire him but it's nothing romantic
Akaashi Keiji
I believe that.
YUUJI NO CHANGE
sarcasm?
Akaashi Keiji
No
no
thank you Akaashi
Akaashi Keiji
Now, what was that with your pinch server?
no
*fuck you Akaashi
futa futa night fever
fuck em up keiji
Ennoshita
uhm excuse me
the only one who can call him by his first name is his boyfriend
so, me
Akaashi Keiji
He's right
Thank you, Chikara
no
you're not even actually together and you already annoy me
Ennoshita
what of course we are
didn't you see our heartfelt confessions in this group chat
Yahaba
I can't believe the aro guy has a better love life than me.
YUUJI NO CHANGE
shit kaash ur aro?
Akaashi Keiji
No
Ennoshita
I am
I'm the certified aromantic™
YUUJI NO CHANGE
thank god
no offense enno
Yahaba
How would he not take that offensively?
YUUJI NO CHANGE
are u ace too
Ennoshita
yes
YUUJI NO CHANGE
shit
futa futa night fever
you just wanna get into his pants
I admire your enthusiasm
YUUJI NO CHANGE
thx
no
don't let them become friends
they'll ruin everything
Yahaba
Garbage Man is right, promote him to Garbage Boss.
YUUJI NO CHANGE
i have the feeling u wanna meme but u cant think of an actual meme
no
why would anyone WANT to meme
though I guess Yahaba does lack taste so he might idk
futa futa night fever
EXCUSE YOU
DON'T INSULT MEMES
Yahaba
I don't like memes, but if Shirabu hates them, I do now.
Akaashi Keiji
And here I thought Konoha-san was petty
Ennoshita
admittedly, Yahaba's captain is the pettiest person on earth
obviously he'd pick some of that up
Yahaba
Ennoshita I swear to fuck
Ennoshita
I'm not insulting him, it's just a statement
I think pettiness can be a gift
it depends on what you do with it
YUUJI NO CHANGE
das deep
no
it's not
Akaashi Keiji
Not deep or not a gift?
no
both
YUUJI NO CHANGE
boo
ur boring
Yahaba
Be boring without me, I'm off.
Yahaba is now offline
no
good riddance
futa futa night fever
yahabye
YUUJI NO CHANGE
u cant just leave like that
yahabaaaa
yahababe
yahabae
oh hey weve come full circle
Ennoshita
Yahabye sounds like some Brexit stuff
no
Yahabitch is not a country
futa futa night fever
come on 'yahabitch' is a stretch
no
I don't put effort in my insults for him
he doesn't deserve it
YUUJI NO CHANGE
tsuntsuntsun
futa futa night fever
dere
Akaashi Keiji
Miyagi people are strange
Let's add some others, Chikara
Ennoshita
sure thing babe
no
I hate all of you
futa futa night fever
see now you just sound like yahaba
YUUJI NO CHANGE
why do you get to decide??
Akaashi Keiji
We made this chat. We're like the parents.
Ennoshita
can I be the mom
futa futa night fever
you can be whatever you want to be
YUUJI NO CHANGE
inspirational bro
Ennoshita
I'd thank you but I don't want to lose my dignity
Akaashi Keiji
Thank you on Chikara's behalf
I don't have any dignity to lose so I did it for you
YUUJI NO CHANGE
awww
#couplegoals
Ennoshita
you're the best
Akaashi Keiji
I know.
no
you know what fuck you
I'm gone
no is now offline
Ennoshita
there goes our daily dose of sodium
anyway got any ideas on who to add?
Akaashi Keiji
I could ask Kuroo-san about Nekoma but that would require talking to Kuroo-san
YUUJI NO CHANGE
what about that one rly good school? itasomething
futa futa night fever
itachiyama
Akaashi Keiji
I don't know any of them personally so unless one of you has them on your friend list that won't work
Ennoshita
who else is good in Tokyo ... Nohebi?
Akaashi Keiji
Only if we don't add Nekoma. Trust me on this one.
YUUJI NO CHANGE
yo not tokyo but
that school with the twins
inarizaki??
Akaashi Keiji
...
I do have both Miyas ... I don't really talk to them though
futa futa night fever
doesn't matter let's do it
who's their next gen cap
Akaashi Keiji
Osamu
Should I?
Ennoshita
yeah sure
Akaashi Keiji added niya
futa futa night fever
niya
YUUJI NO CHANGE
hi!!
futa futa night fever
hey nobody welcomed me
Akaashi Keiji
He's offline right now
YUUJI NO CHANGE
oh
shame
Ennoshita
should we be nice and shut up so he won't come online to a million notifications
Akaashi Keiji
No offense, but none of us are nice
futa futa night fever
you say that but use 'no offense'
Ennoshita
he has to hold up his persona
futa futa night fever
what persona
Ennoshita
the nice persona
futa futa night fever
you're not really helping
YUUJI NO CHANGE
btw why is the name of this group silence
whats the opposite of silence
futa futa night fever
noise?
YUUJI NO CHANGE
not quite
Ennoshita
loudness
Akaashi Keiji
I know that's a word but it doesn't sound like one
YUUJI NO CHANGE
PARTY
Ennoshita
do you know what an antonym is
YUUJOU NO CHANGE changed the name of the conversation to PARTY!!!!!
Akaashi Keiji
Oh please no
I'm off, I have class anyway
Ennoshita
bye babe <3
Akaashi Keiji is now offline
futa futa night fever
so it's just the three of us now
YUUJI NO CHANGE
three is two too many
lets fight
to the DEATH
there can be only one
Ennoshita
only one what
YUUJI NO CHANGE
there can be only one
choose ur weapons
i have a blinding smile and a winning personality
futa futa night fever
I have a gun
Ennoshita
I have Terushima's ego
futa futa night fever
shit you win
Ennoshita
mwahahaha
YUUJI NO CHANGE
HEY
Ennoshita
be happy you can be useful for once in your life
YUUJI NO CHANGE
THIS IS BULLYING
FUTA HE'S BULLYING ME
futa futa night fever
ennoshita bullying is bad
that being said do go on
you have my full support
Ennoshita
I don't want that
I'll stop
YUUJI NO CHANGE
thx futa my guy
futa futa night fever
..........................
bye
futa futa night fever is now offline
YUUJI NO CHANGE
nooooo
he was so young
Ennoshita
we are gathered here today to mourn the tragic passing of Futakuchi Kenji.
YUUJI NO CHANGE
how could he *sniff* how could he do this to us
Ennoshita
I have but one thing to say:
rest in pieces
YUUJI NO CHANGE
goodbye my friend
you will be missed
YUUJI NO CHANGE is now offline
Ennoshita
ah
wonderful
silence