Chapter Text
Jeremy never had a good relationship with his mother.
It wasn't that he hated her. It wasn't that he didn't want to spend time with her. It was something else entirely.
Ever since an early age, Jeremy has always felt, well, bad when he would be with his mother. Not all the time. There were times when his mother made him laugh and smile, and she was the most wonderful mother he could ever ask for. They've had some of these moments. Those are the moments that made Jeremy look back on and wonder why they couldn't be at that point.
Then there was every other time.
Every other time Jeremy always did something. He always did something wrong. He always was the one to blame. Jeremy would go to the park and some kid would push him, causing him to get his knee scraped? It was probably Jeremy's fault for falling. Jeremy didn't know how to ride a bike because everytime he went on it without training wheels he would fall and start crying? He should just man up. Those were only when he was a child.
Jeremy always spent time with his best friend. It was just what best friends did, they hung out. Though, a few months after the fall of their junior year, where once again, he had messed up, Jeremy and Michael became something more.
"Finally, done!" Michael said over the phone, an exhausted sigh escaping him. Jeremy giggled a bit over the phone. It was only ten o'clock, and Michael didn't get much sleep the night before. The two also had been cramming for a few tests for the following week.
"Get some sleep, I have to call my mom." Jeremy smiled over the phone. Another thing Jeremy did after the squip had left, he had been trying desperately to rebuild his relationship with his mother. He longed for his mom, he missed her. She was so quick to move on from them, Jeremy had to wonder if he would ever move on himself. So they called each other every weeknight. Though he had been slacking lately, admittedly. He had play rehearsals two of five days a week, never ending piles of homework, and a boyfriend. Of course he didn't always have time to call her.
"Okay. I love you." Michael said tiredly. "I'll see you tomorrow?" He asked.
"Of course you will. I love you too, now goodnight Mikey." Jeremy grinned, packing up his school things.
"Night Miah." Michael said before the call ended. Jeremy sighed in contentment, checking over his phone. He saw the time, and he had about another hour until he needed to sleep, enough time to call his mom. He hadn't talked to her in a few days, and he hoped everything was alright with her.
Jeremy dialed the numbered, pressing his phone back to his ear. She answered seemingly quickly. "Hey mom! Sorry I haven't had time to call. I was helping Michael study. Man I'm so exhausted." He said, the last part mostly being a joke.
"You were spending time with Michael, again, instead of the woman who gave you life." Jeremy's mother said, pursing her lips together. He could feel his heart starting to break a bit, but held back any negative emotions.
"Well- I-I had too. Mom, he has a D in science, the only class I can help him with. Plus I-I got play rehearsal and homework and-" Jeremy said, being cut off abruptly by her sigh.
"Excuses. You have play rehearsal one day, homework the next, you're tired all the time and you never bitch about talking to Michael." His mother tsked.
"I'm a high school student, of course I never get sleep." He joked.
"Well, then go to sleep at a reasonable time. You know what? Why do you insist on talking to Michael all day and night bur never me? Why am I always last place in your life?" His mother asked. She didn't say it, but he knew she was thinking why would you do this to me?
Jeremy was at a loss for words. He didn't know how everything happened. It all crumbled so quickly. Everything was falling apart around him. He could only sit frozen, not being able to speak, not even an answer could show through his head.
"Doesn't that make you sound so shitty?" His mother asked. He continued to stay silent. He knew what to do, he needed to do everything she wanted him to do, even though it felt like that was his whole life. Pleasing her and making her happy. "Answer me. Doesn't it make you sound shitty?"
"Yes. It does." Jeremy answered quietly.
"You're always pushing me away. I can't even have a good relationship with you because you're always talking to Michael, there'a no getting rid of him. And you're always busy or tired when all I want in 5 hours of your time every week. Do you know how many hours there are in a week?" She asked.
"W-Well no-" Jeremy sniffled, holding back an avalanche of tears. He heard brief typing before her voice again.
"168 hours. And I want five of those hours, I can't even have that. Am I not the most important person in your life? I made you!" She scolded.
Jeremy took a deep breath. "I-I'm sorry, I don't want to make you feel that way and it's awful of me that I do. I'm sorry." He apologized.
"You're only sorry because it'a convenient for you. You're only saying sorry because I'm telling you fuck you, and you know what? Fuck Michael too. Fuck both of you." His mother hissed.
"No, I am! I'm sorry, I'm so sor-"
"You aren't! Just hang up on me and find a way to fix this. Unless you're unable to do a simple task like that." His mother said. Jeremy hung up quickly, tossing his phone beside him and curling up into a ball.
Sadness, all the sadness, guilt, and overall the awful feeling washed over him as he let put his first tear. He cried for a solid five minutes before calling Michael. He needed someone. He needed to be told it was okay. He needed to cry to someone. He needed to not be alone. He felt so, so alone. Not even the squip managed to take advantage if his vulnerable state, and at this point, he would cry to the squip if there was no other choice.
Every voice was silent but his own. The room was quiet and he could only hear his quick gasps and the dial tone as he called Michael.
But Michael didn't pick up.
So, he called again.
No answer.
Jeremy called over and over again. He called for an hour straight, hoping and praying to not be alone. He couldn't be alone. He didn't want to be alone.
But he was.
All he did that night was cry until he fell asleep.