Chapter Text
Isak was late. Extremely so. He’d somehow managed to press snooze 8 times in a row – he wasn’t a morning person okay – and now was facing the consequence of this stupid decision that his sleep-deprived brain had made at 7am.
He hadn’t managed to get to sleep until gone 4am and it wasn’t for lack of trying. Isak had tucked himself up at 10pm the previous night, freshly showered with a glass of warm milk and yet he still couldn’t kick his insomnia and so proceeded to lay there tossing and turning for hours whilst his oblivious boyfriend snored next to him.
Isak looked jealously over at Erik’s body that was still asleep, wrapped up in the warm duvet whilst he hopped around the room trying to simultaneously pull on his trousers and find his shoes.
As an aspiring author, Erik didn’t even have to leave the house for work. He also didn’t bring in any money meaning that Isak had to work a job he hated as a junior laboratory assistant in a run-down research facility just to keep them both paying their rent money and, you know, not starving.
But it was okay. Erik told him frequently that when he finished his novel (and it had been two years coming now) that he and Isak would be millionaires and everything would have been worth it. This doesn’t however make getting up at the crack of dawn for a job he hated any easier for Isak.
Having located his shoes, Isak shoved his feet inside them, not having the time to pull the backs over his heels and ran out of the flat. It was a ten minute walk – or a five minute run – to the nearest underground station and Isak just made it on to the platform, red faced and panting, just as train pulled into the station.
He stood for the length of the journey, tapping his foot incessantly and checking his phone for the time every 30 seconds as if the clock would magically spring back an hour and he’d be on time.
His boss hated lateness just as much as Isak hated his boss. When he took this job he thought it would be interesting, sure it’s not exactly what he wanted to do but at least it was in the general field of science. However, it turned out that “junior laboratory assistant” meant “someone whose primary job is getting coffee and photocopying whilst not getting to do any actual physics research whatsoever”. Physics wasn’t even his favourite science, biology was, so it wasn’t even like he was experiencing research that really excited him. All in all, it sucked.
When the tube finally reached the stop that was nearest the research facility, Isak leapt through the doors and started sprinting up the escalator. He finally reached the lab 1 hour and 40 minutes after he was expected; he barely had time to dump his briefcase on his small desk before his boss called him into the office, the look of thunder on her face.
“Mr Valtersen, I’m glad you’ve finally graced us with your presence.” The sarcasm was dripping from her voice and made Isak gulp.
“I’m so sorry! After the overtime I worked yesterday I was wiped out, I managed to oversleep and-”
“What if I told you that I had a very important visitor this morning, someone from the board that provides our research funding? What if that visitor wanted our junior assistant to show him around the laboratory and was very unimpressed when I couldn’t find you? Would your apology be able to fix that?”
Isak felt his face fell, “Again, I’m so sorry! I had no idea that he was coming in today or I would have-”
“It makes no difference to me what you would have done differently, you might very well have cost us our funding.” She pursed her lips together, looking over the top of his glasses to address him. “I’m afraid Mr Valtersen, I cannot trust you to work for me any longer. Please clear out your desk and begin looking for another job.”
*
Fired. He couldn’t believe it. He was still in a state of shock as he walked himself back to the underground station to take himself home again, his desk contents now in his briefcase. Underneath the shock was a layer of anger. He had made one mistake and that was it? He had hated that job and yet he still felt so humiliated.
All he wanted now was to get home as soon as he could and vent to Erik whilst eating as much food as possible. Preferably the unhealthiest food he could lay his hands on: if he was going to mourn the loss of his income, he would at least do it whilst eating something that tasted good.
Isak was standing on the escalator that was taking him back underground and was about to text Erik to ask if they had any doritos left when he heard a train pull into the station just ahead of him. If he ran he could make it.
Running somewhere for the third time that day, Isak took off down the escalator just as a big group of people exiting the train started coming towards him. Amongst them was a little girl clutching her dad with one hand and an Elsa doll in the other.
And in this universe…
Just as Isak was in front of her, the girl dropped her doll at his feet and leapt down to fetch it again. This small obstacle was enough to slow Isak down as he was forced to step to the side to dodge her, he reached the platform just as the trains sliding doors doors shut in front of him and the train began to speed away again into the tunnel, leaving Isak alone and panting on the platform.
That’s when an announcement came over the sound system that there was a train derailment on the Bakerloo line so major delays will be expected. The next train to Isak’s stop was now scheduled for 50 minutes time.
Why can’t one thing just go his way today? Can’t this universe give him a break?
Isak trailed his feet back up the escalator he had sprinted down and walked on to the street. Pushing aside his sweaty curls, he stood on the edge of the curb and tried to flag down a taxi. After four driving straight past him, one finally pulled up just as two men exited the tube station.
One made direct eye contact with him and Isak replied with the tight lipped, polite smile that he reserved for strangers. The man however gave Isak a once over and Isak saw his mouth curve into a snarl as his gaze came to rest on the lapel of Isaks jacket. Isak knew exactly what had caught his attention, it was the small gay pride badge that he had pinned there, a Christmas present from Eva.
“Nice pin, fag.” Isaks insides went cold at the slur and just as he managed to swallow the lump in his throat the other man spat at him. Before Isak could react, his briefcase was ripped out of his grasp and he was shoved, making him fall to the floor and cut his cheek open on the pavement. The men’s cruel laughter echoed in the air as they raced around the corner, Isaks briefcase in hand.
Isak felt an arm around his shoulders and let the taxi driver pull him to his feet. “Looks like you need stitches, let me drive you to the hospital.”
Isak rang Erik as the taxi driver took him to Chelsea Westminster Hospital but no one picked up.
Now Isak was jobless, alone and bleeding.
meanwhile, in a different universe…
Isak was standing on the escalator that was taking him back underground and was about to text Erik to ask if they had any doritos left when he heard a train pull into the station just ahead of him. If he ran he could make it.
Running somewhere for the third time that day, Isak took off down the escalator just as a big group of people exiting the train started coming towards them. Amongst them was a little girl clutching her dad with one hand and an Elsa doll in the other.
The girls dad took the Elsa doll out of her hand as they passed in front of Isak, “Let me have that honey, I don’t want you to drop it.”
Isak slips past the rest incoming crowd easily and darts inside the sliding doors of the tube train just before they slide shut. With a sigh of relief that finally something today had gone in his favour, Isak made his way into the only empty seat left in the far corner of the carriage and slumped down as the train sped away from the platform and into the dark tunnel.
It was only now that he stopped moving that the reality of his situation hit him. He had been fired. He was now unemployed for the first time since he was 16 and had taken on a barista job in his local coffee shop on the weekends. He had kept a job all through university and had started this job as laboratory assistant right after graduation; the thought of having no money regularly coming into his bank account made his stomach twist unpleasantly.
On top of that, he felt like he had let Erik down; Isak’s salary was what supported them as Erik fulfilled his dream of writing a novel. Now it was gone.
Isak let his head fall back and hit the window behind him, fully ready to use the rest of his journey home to wallow in his own self-pity and despair. This wallowing however was interrupted by the tall blonde man next to him who was loudly attempting to engage a woman in conversation.
“Romeo and Juliet, huh?” The woman sitting across the carriage to whom this question was directed towards only lifted her eyes from her copy of the play for two seconds to nod curtly before returning to her reading. The man however didn’t take the hint that she clearly didn’t want to make small talk and continued speaking.
“Have you seen the 1996 film adaptation! I think Luhrmann captures the love and tragedy of the story so beautifully.” His energetic and chatty tone did not fit in with the otherwise silent train - people got on the tube to sit down and avoid eye contact, not make small talk for the hell of it.
That’s when the man turned to Isak, having decided that he should involve more people in his very one-sided conversation. “Don’t you agree? Don’t you think that everyone who can understand the English language should see that film?” Isak lifted his head to glare at the stranger. Why couldn’t a man be left to wallow in peace?
“I couldn’t say, I’ve never seen it.” Isak replied shortly, in an attempt to excuse himself from this conversation as quickly as possible.
This didn’t work however as the (very attractive, Isak must say) blonde man now turned in his seat to give Isak his full attention. “You’re kidding me?” he said as he brought his hand to his heart with a look of such dismay that he was making it seem like Isak had confessed to committing a murder instead of just not watching a film. The man gestured to the briefcase Isak was clutching, “An educated man such as yourself hasn’t seen one of the best movies of all time? Well, you’ve got to fix that as soon as possible.”
“Well, considering that I’ve just lost my job, it would be fair to say that seeing a cinematic adaptation of a boring play I studied in high school isn’t at the top of my priority list at the moment, alright?”
The strangers teasing smile faded immediately and his hand dropped back down to his lap. “Wow, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.” The voice was so sincere that Isak’s cold front thawed slightly.
He sighed, “Look, it’s alright. You weren’t to know and I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I’m sorry. I’m just very stressed right now.”
“That’s understandable….um?”
Isak looked up at the stranger once more whose blue eyes were now full of questioning. “This is the part where you tell me your name.”
“It’s Isak.”
“I’m Even, it’s nice to meet you. I’ll shut up now and leave you to your miserable thoughts.”
“I appreciate that.” Isak nodded back and retook his previous slumped over position.
Barely two minutes went by however before Even turned to him again. “Now this next stop is where I have to get off; I thought I’d tell you in case you got up before me and then you thought I was following you. That would look extremely creepy and just ruin this casual friendship we’ve set up.”
And with an easy smile Even pushed himself off his seat as the doors slid open, allowing him to duck through onto the platform, his tall hair grazing the rubber frame as he left. Isak rolled his eyes and stood up to leave the train behind him.
“Now I guess I should also set the record straight that I’m not following you, this is my stop as well.”
Even turned to face Isak at his words, slowing down his pace in order to walk out of the station with him. “You could follow me if you liked,” Even said, eyes twinkling, “I wouldn’t mind at all.”
“Though it may be hard to believe, with my unemployment and all, I’m sure there’s better ways I could spend my time.” Isak retorted as the escalator carried them towards daylight.
“I’ll have you know that I’d be a very interesting person to stalk, you could never imagine some of the things I get up to.” Even wiggles his eyebrows to match his words and it prompts Isak to show a small smile.
“Ah! I knew you could do it! Other people in our train carriage wouldn’t believe that the grumpy blonde in the corner could smile but look at that!” Isak rolled his eyes but his poker face was betrayed by another small smile creeping his way on to his face.
Even started to back away from him as they reached the station exit, seemingly going the opposite direction from the street that led to Isak’s flat, “Keep smiling Isak, you’ll find another job soon and life will be okay.”
Isak shoots him an earnest smile as he too starts to back away, “Thank you. Have a good day, Even.”
“You too Isak.”
*
Within ten minutes, Isak was stood outside his door, wanting nothing more than to just get inside and take a long, hot bath to take his mind off everything. As he turns his key in the lock, Isak swears he can hear muffled voices from inside the flat which strikes him as strange. Erik would never have friends over on a Thursday at 2pm and it’s not like he has any business skype calls with his occupation as an aspiring author.
As he steps into the flat, the muffled sounds only become more clear causing Isak to instinctively track down the source of the noise. As he rounds the corner in the hallway he comes across a pair of jeans and two shirts left in a messy heap on the floor. The floor just outside his and Erik’s bedroom.
Immediately Isak’s heart leaps to his throat, choking him, as his brain processes just what this could mean. Nevertheless, his path towards the noise continues, almost as if he was on autopilot, and he pushes open the door to his and Erik’s bedroom only to be met with the sight of his naked boyfriend lying on top of another naked man, clearly rather busy if the moans were any indication.
His arrival was announced by the thud of Isak’s briefcase hitting the floor as it slipped out of his hand. Erik’s head jerked up and his eyes widened in a way that Isak may have found funny if it was in a different situation, in a different universe. But he was here in this hellish universe and it wasn’t funny at all.
“I-Isak!” Erik spluttered as he rolled off the other man who had his head where Isak’ normally laid. “What are you-, you’re not meant to be home yet!”
Something inside Isak snapped. “Oh, I’m sorry, should I come back later so you can finish?” His remark would have been cutting if Isaks throat wasn’t thick with tears.
“That’s not what I meant!” The desperate and pleading note in Erik’s voice made Isak feel sick. “God, Issy-” Erik made to grab Isaks arm but he jerked out of his reach.
“What is this? Is this a one-time fuck or something else, Erik? An affair?!”
Erik’s desperate splutters were an answer in themselves. Tears blur Isak’s vision. He’d let someone inside his ten-foot high emotional walls, had let himself fall in love, and yet had somehow been fucked over in the process. Isak was sure love wasn’t meant to work that way.
How could he have been so stupid? How could he not have noticed his boyfriend having an affair?
“How long has it been going on then?” Isak’s voice was getting watery but he forces himself to stand straight and try not to appear quite as weak as he felt.
“Isak! I- I was going to end it, I swear!”
“End it? With who? Him or me?”
Erik’s eyes bulged again, but before he could stammer a reply Isak cut him off, “You know what, it doesn’t matter. Consider me and you over.”
Isak spun around so viciously that a few of the tears he had been holding back leaked down his cheeks. He grabbed his phone and wallet before slamming the bedroom door behind him.
meanwhile, in the other universe…
Isak felt stupid. He had a massive dinosaur-patterned plaster across his cheek to cover his fresh stiches, apparently the A&E had run out of extra-large size adult plasters so he was stuck with one designed for a child. How does a hospital run out of plasters?
It had taken hours as well. Jonas was always ranting about how poorly funded the NHS is but Isak didn’t fully appreciate his point until he was the one having to sit around, waiting for treatment.
He stepped out of his taxi and crossed the street into the three-story building he lived in, as he reached the building door another man was exiting and held the door open for him. He looked about Isaks age but he didn’t recognise the man as a neighbour. Maybe he just moved in. Whatever. He was eying Isak’s plaster with thinly veiled distain so it wasn’t like they were going to be friends therefore who cared who this man was.
Isak turned the key in the lock of his flat door and was met to the sound of the running water of the shower. “Uh, Isak? Is that you?” Eriks voice sounded echo-y from the bathroom and Isak dumped his jacket on the sofa before making his way there.
“Yeah, who else would it be?” Isak pushed the door open just as Erik stepped out and grabbed a towel, “Have you only just got up? What the fuck its almost 4pm.”
“No, I just wanted to freshen up-,” Erik raised his eyes to meet Isak’s for the first time and saw his plaster. “Baby, what the fuck happened to you?”
“It’s a long story but to cut it short I got fired and then these guys jumped me on the street, stole my briefcase and left me with the gracious gift of 8 stiches.” Erik took Isak’s face in his hands, cupping his cheeks causing Isak to look down at him and pout. “I called you but you didn’t pick up.”
Erik cleared his throat, “Sorry, I must have been busy writing. And I’m sorry this happened to you. What happened at work?”
“I overslept so I got fired. Whatever, I hated it anyway.”
“There’s plenty of part time work that you can do instead, like delivery and all that, you know to still bring in some money.”
The prospect of being a delivery boy with a university degree made Isak glum, “Yeah, I guess.”
“But hey, forget about that now. Have you eaten today?” Isak shook his head in reply, “Okay then, how about we order Chinese from your favourite place and then go down to the pub and get absolutely hammered. I’m talking the kind of all-out drunk where you start serenading the bar tender with Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler until we get kicked out. Does that sound good?”
Isak lets his mouth slip into a tight smile and nods his head in consent whilst Erik immediately lets go and walks into the kitchen to find the takeout menu.
By 8pm that night, Isak was spinning himself absent-minded on a bar store whilst Erik kept ordering him drink after drink.
“Fuck your boss!” Erik crowed loudly as Isak let out a laugh, “Let’s cheers to you getting a new job and me finishing my book. To me! And to you!” They tried to knock their glasses together but their intoxicated states led to them missing by at least 30 centimetres which set Isak off in another bout of giggles.
Isak was currently the right side of tipsy where everything felt warm and he was laughing at almost anything Erik said even though a sober Isak would find none of it particularly amusing. His drunken mind had allowed him to view the world with rose-tinted glasses and in that moment everything felt fine, despite his lack of a pay check and gain of a ridiculous dinosaur plaster.
Maybe everything would be fine. He could handle this. Erik was here and he would be fine.
meanwhile, in the other universe…
Isak was drunk. After storming out of the flat and wandering aimlessly for a few hours until the tears finally stopped, he had gone to the nearest pub and occupied himself with drinking enough to drown out the memory of his cheating twat of an ex-boyfriend.
He had only spoken one sentence to the bar tender since arriving and that was an instruction to fill his glass whenever it looked empty; the man had complied and so Isak had no idea what drink he was on at this point. His sixth? Or maybe eighth?
Isak was the side of drunk where every second thought was self-deprecating. He hated himself for being so cut up over the break-up; Erik clearly hadn’t cared about him as much as Isak had thought and that made Isak feel impossibly stupid. Why did he trust the wrong people? Why did no one stay?
He rested his chin on the hands, and was about to down the rest of his drink when he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. “Isak?” He looked up at his name to be greeted with the man he had sat next to on the tube, the one with the swoopy hair and nice eyes. Isak screwed up his eyes as his intoxicated mind tried to chase the mans name around his head, trying to match it to the face. Was it Edward? Edmund? Wait! “Even!”
Isak heard a chuckle, “Yes, that’s me. I’m glad you remember or this would have been awkward.”
“You’d be hard to forget,” Isak replied in the brazen way that only a drunk person can. It was true though, maybe his brain was too busy swimming in alcohol to remember his name straight away but it felt like Even’s face was practically imprinted in the back of Isak’s brain ever since their interaction. Which was odd.
Even quirked an eyebrow, “I’ll take that as a compliment?” When Isak didn’t reply he continued. “Well anyway, I was just sat over there with my friend and noticed you looking glum. I thought I’d come over to check you were okay?”
Isak sighed, “Well I wouldn’t use that word to currently describe myself.”
“Things will work themselves out, I’m sure a smart guy like you can find a new job.”
Isak couldn’t help but smile at Even’s kindness despite the heaviness in his heart. “Yeah, the whole job thing sucked but it felt fixable until I came home and found my boyfriend in bed with someone else. As you can imagine, that was the cherry on top of the fucking cake that was my shitty day.”
Even’s eyes went from optimistic to sympathetic, “I’m so sorry Isak, you don’t deserve any of that.”
“Don’t apologise. He didn’t feel the need to so you definitely shouldn’t.”
Even nodded hesitantly, “Okay. Well, I’ll leave you to have some peace but I’m just over in the corner booth if you need anything, alright?”
“Thanks Even. Again.” Even squeezed his arm, before making his way back over to his friend leaving Isak alone and slightly missing the presence of another human.
This feeling didn’t last long though because just as the bar tender is once again filling up his glass the door to the pub opens and Eva bursts in with Jonas right behind her.
“Isak!” They yell in sync as they make their way over, settling opposite sides of him and wrapping their arms around his shoulders.
“I’m so glad we found you! I was so worried!” Eva wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Isak felt his tears well up again at this simple act of affection. He suddenly realised how long it had been since someone had hugged him. He pressed the base of his palm into his eyes to keep the tears from coming out.
“How did you guys find me?” He hiccupped half way through his sentence causing Jonas to look disapprovingly at Isaks glass and gently push it out of reach.
“Erik came over to our place trying to find you. He kept trying to get me to call you so he could know where you were. He was pleading about how bad he felt which clearly meant he had fucked up and upset you. This is kind of where you go when you’re sad.”
“Yeah, I found him cheating on me. It’s probably been going on for a while now.” Isak somehow felt heavier after admitting it out loud to his two best friends and he let his head slip on to Jonas’ shoulder.
Both Jonas and Eva let out sharp sounds, a mixture of dismay and anger. “Asshole!” Isak nodded glumly at Jonas’ statement as Eva took her spare hand to brush Isak’s hair out of his eyes.
“You were always too good for him Isak.” Eva said solemnly.
“What did you guys tell him?”
“I said that I didn’t know where you were but when I found out I wouldn’t be telling him anything you didn’t want him to know.”
“Yeah, he seems to think that by dating you that we’re automatically his best friends too. Twat.” Eva let out a growl at the end of her sentence and wound her arms even tighter around Isak. “Jonas told him that we’d always take your side so he can forget about it. He gave up after I slammed the door in his face.”
Isak nodded, not able to get the right words out to explain just how grateful he was to have friends like Jonas and Eva.
“But enough about him, how are you, man?”
At the direct question Isak couldn’t stop the silent tears from rolling down his face again.
“My minds just a mess right now, I can’t even tell if I’m more angry or hurt. All I do know is that I feel so... so stupid! How did I not notice anything?!”
Jonas’ face twisted into a look of concern, “Don’t blame yourself for anything Is. You were in a committed relationship, you aren’t meant to be constantly looking for evidence of cheating. You’re meant to trust your partner and it’s not your fault that Erik betrayed that.”
“He’s right Isak.” Eva agreed, running her hand up and down Isak’s arm. “Come on, let’s get you home. You can stay in our spare room for as long as you like.”
*
The next morning Isak wakes up at 11am with only a minor headache. He vaguely remembers Jonas making him down two litres of water last night before he slept. Just as he’s silently praising Jonas and all his common sense that probably stemmed from his fiancé who was infamous for drinking too much, the man himself walks in with said fiancé in tow.
“Morning Iss. Feeling alright?” Jonas sets a fresh glass of water on the bedside table as Eva sits down on the edge of the bed, a pile of clothes in her arms.
“Emotionally I’m very shitty but physically, I’m only a little shitty. Small mercies I guess.” It’s a very weak attempt at humour that only brings more pity to his friend’s expressions.
“Well, you never have to see that asshole again. Me and Jonas went to your flat this morning and collected all your things.” Eva nods to the corner of the spare bedroom Isak is in at the small mountain of things piled there. “I also took two £20 notes from Eriks jeans.”
Isak smiled as Eva handed him the notes with a small wink, “That’s paying for our takeout tonight.”
“Or you could invest in a banner to hang across the London Bridge. Have Erik’s face on it with the caption ‘This man is a fugly slut. Do not trust him!’ ”
Jonas shook his head at Eva but started laughing as soon as he saw Isak laughing too.
“Relatable movie references aside, I made breakfast, if you want some?”
On cue, Isaks stomach rumbled. Jonas’ hangover cure breakfasts were always the best.
Nodding his head, he followed the other two into their tiny kitchen and sat himself down at the breakfast bar. Within three minutes, Isak has a plate piled high with food which he tucked into eagerly, knocking elbows with Jonas and Eva as they both started on their own plates.
As he stuffed his face Isak felt a twinge of guilt that he was now invading Jonas and Eva’s personal space. Their flat was small and as a fairly newly engaged couple they probably needed their space without a grumpy blonde getting in their way and eating their food.
But he could hardly look for a flat of his own with no idea of his price range due to his current employment, or rather his lack of it.
Which was another issue he needs to look at. The problem was that Isak didn’t even know where to begin looking; he’d had that terrible job for so long the idea of trying to apply for a job he actually wanted seemed foreign. He wasn’t even sure what he wanted to do anymore. Add on top of that the still fresh betrayal of someone who used to be the closest to him and Isaks whole outlook on the world was pretty crappy.
“Isak. I can practically hear your brain going into overdrive.” Jonas leaned over to pat his shoulder comfortingly, “You don’t have to bottle things up you know, you can talk to us.”
Easier said than done.
Isak sighed. “I just have no fucking clue what I’m supposed to do now. Where do I even start? A new job? A place to rent? Cutting Erik out of all my photos?”
Jonas and Eva exchanged sympathetic looks above Isak’s head as he slumped down beside his bacon.
“Look, I get it. You feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and you can’t even imagine a way out of this. That’s how I felt after me and Vilde broke up. But I just took things one day at a time, you can’t expect an immediate fix for everything, but I promise that there will be a moment in the near future where you can honestly say that everything is okay again. Actually, that things are better than they ever have been.” Eva paused to loosely loop her arm around Isaks shoulders, knocking off Jonas’ hand accidently in the process, “Just focus on one thing at a time.”
Eva made sense, she often did if Isak was being honest (not that he would tell her that – her ego can be big enough thank you very much).
“Okay,” Isak nodded his consent, feeling a small smile returning to his face, “Today’s thing will be dropping off my old keys to the landlord and signing up to some employment websites.”
“Atta boy!” Jonas raised his orange juice to make a toast, “To Isak! He’s going to be stable, slick and getting some new dick!”
“Hear, hear!” Eva crowed. Isak rolled his eyes but joined in with clinking their glasses together.
*
After breakfast Eva headed off to her yoga class, Jonas went to meet his sister for coffee and Isak went to drop off his keys.
The walk was only a short one, Eva and Jonas’ flat was only a five minute walk from Isak and Eriks (though now it was simply Eriks), and the sky was surprisingly clear for an autumn day in London.
The streets were moderately busy with parents trying to drag their kids to the park for some fresh air and teenagers rushing off to try and catch the last few hours of warmth before winter properly started. Isak was just admiring an extremely fluffy puppy that was being walked on the other side of the street when he crashed right into someone.
“Oof! I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going!” Isak raised his eyeline to find himself face to face with Even.
There was around 8.8 million people in London, so how did Isak keep running (now quite literally apparently) into this one?
“No worries Isak, I understand what it’s like to be distracted by a cute face.” Even’s bright and suggestive grin sees Isak sharing a similar one on his own face.
“Hate to break it to you, but that puppy is the only cute face around here that’s distracting for me.”
Even held his hand over his heart and dropped his mouth open to feign hurt, “You mean to say that you rank that ball of fluff over me? I’ll have you know that I was voted ‘Best Hair’ in my high school yearbook.”
Isak snorted with laughter and only had a brief moment of embarrassment at the unattractiveness of the sound, “And I’m sure that that’s the top line of your CV.”
“Yes, right under ‘can make awesome conversations on the underground’. Even’s eyes lingered on Isak’s face. “So, where are you off to?”
“I’m going to hand in my old keys to my landlord,” Isak waved the keys uselessly in the air as if his comment needed a demonstration.
“Oh, you’ve just moved?”
“Yeah I guess, my friends moved my stuff out this morning into their flat. I didn’t fancy staying around my old one for much longer.” At the mere mention of his situation, Isak felt his small smile fall into a frown.
Even’s eyes widen slightly, having understood the implication behind Isak’s words. He had after all been there for some of Isak’s drunken ramblings yesterday.
There was a moment of awkward silence which Even quickly rushed to fill. “I’m sorry I brought it up, I should have thought.”
Isak shrugged, “You weren’t to know.”
“Well, I’m sorry anyways. How about I treat you to a milkshake? There’s this great place around the corner, their drinks are always insane.”
Isak felt himself hesitate at the invitation which, again, Even seemed to clock. How did he work out what was going on in Isak’s head so well?
“Come on! I just want to see that frown off your face, what’s the harm in a milkshake between friends?”
Isak looked up to meet Even’s eyes again and the unmasked enthusiasm makes it impossible to turn him down. “Uh- Okay. Alright then. But only because you’re paying.”
Even flashed him another grin before leading the way to the milkshake place.
*
Even was right. Insane was the only word Isak could use to describe the milkshake sitting in front of him. It had a mountain of whipped cream, rich chocolate and even a full-sized brownie perched on the top.
Even was also right in the fact that Isak’s frown was long gone, lost the moment conversation started flowing between the pair of them. They were covering a random range of topics, anything that came to mind, from movies (“I thought you said that just to shut me up! How have you lived 24 years without seeing Romeo+Juliet, Isak what the fuck?!”), music (“You listen to that poppy crap? God Even, I had you pegged as this cool guy… I guess they’re right when they say that first impressions are normally wrong.”) and even their split opinions about pineapple on pizza (“It’s common knowledge that pineapple is the most superior fruit so why not put it on pizza?” “Isak that’s totally barbaric, you need to be banned from ever consuming pizza again.”)
There was never an awkward pause and the laughter seemed to flow out of them both. For the first time in a while Isak simply felt at ease; he’d missed it.
An hour later, Isak was obnoxiously slurping up the frothy remains of his drink whilst Even finished a funny story about his friend Mikael involving a drunken night and an inflatable flamingo that had Isak choking with laughter.
“I can’t believe he did that! He sounds like a great person to have around. My friend Magnus is always doing similar stupid shit that I can laugh at.”
“Yeah, I only keep him in my life for the entertainment.” Even joked before pausing to add, “And really, he is a great friend, he’s been there for me when other people wouldn’t. Hey, you should meet him!” Even’s eyes lit up as he leaned further in to Isak who was looking back sceptically from across the booth, unsure about where this was going. “I’m serious. We’re having a dinner party in a couple of weeks at Mikael’s house, you should come! It’ll be totally relaxed, just a few friends and a lot of wine.”
The wine tempted Isak, but hanging around with a bunch of strangers who already all knew each other didn’t sound too appealing. Although, if they were all as nice as Even it couldn’t be too bad.
Again Even sensed his unease, “You don’t have to come if you don’t want to of course. But it might be nice to just have a night out, you know? And my friends don’t bite. In fact, Yousef is bringing his new girlfriend so you’d just have to sit back and laugh at us teasing him. Even join in if you want.” Even tried to wink at Isak from across the booth but dismally failed, instead offering a twitchy kind of blink which made Isak laugh in his face.
How could the friends of a guy who couldn’t blink be terrifying or mean?
“Alright, I’ll come, it sounds good.”
Even grinned back at him, “Great! Let me give you my number and you can text me closer to the time and I can give you directions.”
Isak nodded and fished his phone out of his pocket to hand to Even. He typed away for a few seconds before handing it back.
“Well, I was meant to be at my parents’ house an hour ago so I should probably head out,” Even said as he slid out the booth and started putting on his coat. “This was fun though, it was nice to see you again Isak.”
Isak smiled softly back at him, “Thank you for the milkshake, and the invitation to dinner.”
“It’s no problem Isak, I’ll see you then.” And with one last wave, Even left the shop leaving Isak with a smile and a new phone contact.
meanwhile, in the other universe…
To say his head hurt was a major understatement. It felt like all him limbs had been replaced with lead and someone had decided to start tap dancing on his skull. He really should have drunk some water when he came in last night.
The other side of the bed was empty and Isak could hear a faint voice of Erik coming from the kitchen, sounding like he was on the phone. Groaning, Isak pushed back the covers and snatched up the glass he keeps on his bedside table. He made his way to the bathroom in search of some ibuprofen to calm the pounding in his head. He was sure that he’d seen two left in the packet yesterday morning.
After rummaging around in the cupboard his only reward for struggling out of bed was a now-empty packet of pills. Erik must have taken the last two already this morning, leaving Isak with none. Rolling his eyes at this form of selfishness, Isak filled his glass to the brim with water and sipped it moodily in a half-assed attempt to banish his headache. He wandered out into the tiny kitchen of their flat, banging open the door as he entered. Erik clocked him and hastily said goodbye to whoever was on the other end of the phone.
“Who was that calling at this time of the morning?” Isak spoke softly, so not to make his head feel any worse than possible.
Erik rubbed the back of his neck as he replied, “Oh, uh- just my mum.” Before Isak could ask what she’d wanted, Erik moved the conversation along. “Look, do you mind cooking us some breakfast? I need to shower before I head out to the library, I’ve got more book research to do.”
“Really? Do you have to go today? It’s a Saturday, I thought we could just have a lazy day or something.” Isak could hear the whining tone in his voice and feel the pout on his lips.
“A book doesn’t write itself honey, you know that. And anyway, weren’t you going to go and get some new jobs today? Rent is due in two weeks I think.” Erik didn’t wait for a reply, instead he quickly kissed Isak on the forehead and moved towards the bathroom.
“Yeah, I guess.” Isak grumbled, mainly to himself as he got some bacon out of the fridge to fry up. He was the one in the personal crisis, why did he have to make breakfast? He knew Erik would just think he’s being bratty though so he doesn’t voice his complaints and just gets on with breakfast.
They eat quickly, both too hungover to make riveting conversation. As soon as Erik’s plate was clear he left the room to grab his coats and shoes. “Thanks for breakfast, and thanks in advance for doing the washing up.”
“This book better be the best damn book I’ve ever read. It feels like you’re always at the library.”
Erik smiled at him as he opened up their flat door, “You know it will be honey. See you later!” And with that he was gone.
Isak stuffed the remaining half of his hash brown into his mouth before piling his own plate on top of Erik’s and carrying it to the sink where the various pots and pans already lay, waiting to be washed. As Isak ran the hot water his mind wandered to what jobs he could get.
There was no way he could secure a job in another science laboratory before the end of the day. Interview stages for science related careers could last weeks and he knew Erik was right: he needed a new job soon if they were going to make rent without dipping into Isak’s savings.
So by the end of the day, Isak had three jobs: a part time morning job in a local bakery, a job delivering sandwiches to people in fancy offices who couldn’t be bothered to get their own and a waiter job in the local Italian restaurant. His first shift as a waiter was this evening and he started in the bakery at 4:30am the following day. Isak knew it was going to be a lot but it was the only way he could make up the salary he’d lost.
And it was a lot. Isak was in a constant state of tired that reminded him of his time at university, though then he’d been a student with plenty of time to sleep but just unable to and now he simply had no time to get a full nights sleep at all. And sure, Isak liked spending time with people (okay, he could stand a short list of people for long periods of time, the list being: Jonas, Eva, Erik and Eskild his old roommate) but when he was working three customer service jobs, he had had it with the constant smiling and pretending he didn’t want to slap someone when they sent back their steak for the third time.
And it wasn’t like he could come home and relax. No there was still laundry to sort, a dishwasher to load and toilet rolls to replace. Erik was near-constantly at the library lately so wasn’t home to do much of the chores. It was all taking its toll on Isak. He could feel his stress growing, sense the constant weight it was starting to press on him again, like when he was still in the closet.
Maybe that’s why Isak reacted the way he did, so dramatically which normally would be out of character.
It happens when he comes home after a seven hour shift at the restaurant that had been preceded by three hours spent delivering and four hours in the bakery. It was around 10pm when Isak got back, throwing his keys down on the kitchen table before slumping there himself. By the sounds of the running water Erik was in the shower and by the small heap of crockery in the sink, he hadn’t even washed up yet from his dinner.
The site of such an unorganised mess made Isak itch so with a roll of his eyes he hauled himself off his chair and shuffled to the sink. There were several plates, probably a combination of breakfast lunch and dinner, a half drunk mug of tea, three chopping boards, two-
Wait.
Two wine glasses.
What?
Isak rubbed his eyes, checking he wasn’t so tired that he was seeing double. But no, there was definitely two wine glasses in the sink.
Why would Erik use two separate wine glasses? Unless…
Something in Isak’s stomach dropped. He stood there for a few moments, still a state of confusion but with dread also lacing its way into his mind.
The kitchen door banged open, “Isak! Hey, how was work? Get many big tips?” When Isak didn’t reply Erik moved closer, “Hello? Are you angry I didn’t do the washing up? I was just about to.”
Isak swallowed roughly, “Not angry, just confused.”
“But why are you…” Erik looked back over at the sink and if Isak hadn’t been staring at him so intensely he might have missed the slight widening of Erik’s eyes. But he had been staring.
“I’m confused as to why there are two wine glasses in the sink.”
“Oh well I- that was from us, last night wasn’t it?” Erik looked at him almost condescendingly, as if Isak was being stupid and forgetting things.
“No, we didn’t have wine last night. I got back late and you were already asleep.”
A mild look of panic crossed Erik’s face, “Okay then, it must have been the night before. We’ve both been busy lately, we must have not washed them up yet. I don’t know. Why this feel like an interrogation though Isak? It’s just a wine glass, what’s the big deal?”
Isak was taken aback with the small outburst, he was just confused and asking after all, “I’m not interrogating-“
“You are! You’re always so dramatic, always so doubtful. Don’t you trust me?”
“Well yes of course I-“
“Are you accusing me of something? All I do is love and care for you and now you’re accusing me?”
The words hung between them, between Erik who had his arms folded and was red in the face and Isak, who had shrunken into his frame.
“I didn’t mean to accuse you, I promise. I was just confused and tired, I guess.” And he was tired. He wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep for 24 hours.
“Yeah, it’s because you’re tired. Look I’ll finish the washing up and you go take a shower, your hair looks a bit greasy babe.”
Yes because I don’t have the time to shower in the morning because I wake up at 3am in order to get to work and pay our rent, you asshole-
“Okay, yeah I will.” Isaks feet led him to the bathroom where he numbly turned the shower on and stepped inside.
*
It’s a little stilted between them for a few days after that. Erik seems more on edge and Isak is just doing his best not to make him angry again. Another change is that when he gets home from his shifts now, Erik has always done the washing up.
A part of Isak hoped that as he continued to work three jobs, it would reach a point where he got used to it, where it got easier. The highlight of his week so far had been when Eva and Jonas showed up at the restaurant to surprise him and Isak managed to sneak 5 minute conversations at their table with them when no one else needed serving. However, even that night had ended up being bittersweet as after they’d left, their table was taken by two drunk girls and when Isak asked for their credit card to pay all the only response he got was one of them vomiting all over his shoes.
He hated the general public.
To top everything off, Isak got a call informing him that his mum had been checked back into her care facility again. Isak loved his mum but he simply didn’t have the time to go and visit her, not between shifts, and so he was getting angry texts from his dad accusing him of not caring. When a particularly nasty text came through at 11pm after a long shift, Isak felt the tears leaking out. It tried to wipe them off his cheeks but more kept coming and soon he was close to sobbing. It was all too much. Everything.
“Isak? What’s the matter?” Erik laid a hand over Isak’s knee over the top of their duvet.
“It’s m-my mum, she’s b-bad again and I don’t know what do.” Isak hated how weak he sounded.
“Is she in the care facility?”
Isak sniffed and wiped his cheeks again, “Yeah, she went in on Wedneasday but I just can’t-“
He was interrupted by Erik’s ringtone blaring out from his night stand.
“Oh, it’s the publishers, probably getting back to me about my rough draft. I have to take this.” And with a squeeze of Isak’s knee, he left the room.
And again, Isak is left feeling slightly numb.