Chapter Text
Donghyuck felt awkward.
Well, to just say awkward would be a major understatement. He had felt awkward before - when he was coerced to act cute in front of the cameras when he completely wasn’t feeling it, or when he got teased in school during the Chewing Gum era - yes, those certainly could be classified under the Awkward Moments of Donghyuck’s Life That He Would Not Want to Relive (but what’s new, of course).
What isn’t just awkward is being forced into a couple photoshoot with your ex.
It’s downright uncomfortable and unsettling - well, it’s not Yukhei’s fault per se, he’s just trying to make the whole thing a lot less painful than it actually is by maintaining minimal contact as possible in a couple shoot (where minimal contact is definitely not the concept they would be going for). Not to mention that the photographer’s constant exhortations that both are “Not natural enough!” or “There’s not chemistry!!” or “Try to maintain eye contact for more than 3 seconds please!” every 5 seconds was definitely not making things any better. Every passing second felt like torture, and he felt closer and closer to screaming back at him.
After another failed shot where Donghyuck just couldn’t bear to hold Yukhei’s piercing gaze for the unrealistic two seconds that the photographer had allotted them, the man called for a ‘break’ - which was a pseudonym for ‘get your act together or else’. As soon as the break was declared, Donghyuck sank to his knees with a sigh, burying his face in his hands. This was way more exhausting than he had predicted. No one warned him that awkwardness from breakups could be this physically exhausting.
He spent three seconds hiding his flaming face from prying eyes before realizing that he was probably ruining 3 hours worth of makeup prep. Feeling guilty for the innocent makeup stylists, he rose, only to be met with Mark Lee’s pinched seagull eyebrows and wide eyes in its full glory, striding towards him.
“You all right?” Mark asked, concern knitting in his brows.
“Yep,” he answered curtly, rising to his feet and not daring to make eye contact, lest he betray the turmoil of confused and unpleasant feelings coiling in his stomach.
“You know, if you really don’t want to do it, you should just tell them. You’re wasting your time trying to force yourself to do things you can’t even bring yourself to,” the elder murmured, rubbing his shoulders in an effort to get rid of the tension there.
“I know, Mark, but what does it matter what I want? They don’t know about us, they won’t understand, and I’m sure as hell not explaining anything,” Donghyuck replied through gritted teeth.
As if on cue, the insufferable photographer clapped his hands obnoxiously, calling to attention the rest of the group and the staff members onsite.
“Alright, since that turned out to be a mess -” he shoots, with a pointed look at Donghyuck, who stared at his shoes, “We are going to scrap it altogether. Visuals are visuals, but it’s not going to work. Mark,” he turned on him, “could you please take over instead?”
Mark starts, and Donghyuck snorted in derision. Of course. He always ended up being sidelined.
“Um, with Yukhei?” he spluttered, running a hand through his raven hair nervously. Donghyuck heard Johnny snort in the background.
“No, silly, with Donghyuck. Your height difference is perfect, it wouldn’t work with him anyway,” the head photographer replied, jutting a thumb at Yukhei. "He's too tall"
Donghyuck’s face was positively flaming by then, and he could see the tips of Mark’s ears turning red too. He let himself be dragged by the arm by Mark towards the white screen, who refuses to look him in the eye, now that all eyes in the studio are on the pair. Donghyuck caught Jaehyun making wiggly eyebrows at Mark, and noticed Ten sniggering with Doyoung perched on a chair at a corner, and he stares right ahead and wills his mind empty, thinking the most nonsense words in his head to fight off whatever ridiculous embarrassment and shyness that came with shooting a couple photoshoot with his best friend.
“Uh, so what do you want to do?” Mark muttered, fiddling with his hands as though not quite sure what to do with them.
“I don’t know, you suggest something, you know everything!” he hissed back, cursing the failure of Mark’s know-it-all attitude in the most crucial of times.
“Remember, be natural!” the photographer boomed and Donghyuck rolled his eyes in irritation.
“Does being natural involve me putting you in a chokehold?” he grinned, attempting to lighten the tense atmosphere. The elder laughs his ridiculously adorable laugh in return, the tension visibly relaxing from his face and his shoulders.
Shoulders.
Be natural.
Donghyuck decided to throw all caution to the wind.
“Don’t flinch, just stay still,” he warned, obviously a facade to suppress his heightening anxiety.
Before Mark could interject, he musteeds up the courage to interlace his trembling fingers with the elder’s, trying his best to ignore how his heart was jackhammering faster than that of a mouse, and leans into the elder’s wide shoulders, shutting his eyes to the world. At first he could feel Mark visibly tense again, but gradually, he felt his muscles relax under his cheek and felt him leaning his head slightly into Donghyuck’s hair, an image of peace. He hears a whoop from the make up station.
The cameras click away.
//
The next morning, he gets a rude shock by being awoken by Yukhei, of all people, at the crack of dawn (but really, it was just 7 am, but nevertheless). A series of unpleasant things ran through his mind in the 5 seconds it took for the boy to stride to his bed, like what if he’s mad at me, what if something bad happened, what if the manager noticed, what if, what if.
He rubbed his eyes groggily and grumbled, trying to keep his voice even, “Whassamater? It’s 7, today’s our day off.”
Yukehi stares at him uncomprehendingly. “Um, Mark asked me to check whether you’re still sleeping. You’re supposed to follow him to the airport, remember?
Donghyuck scrunches his eyes in confusion. “Huh??”
“He’s leaving today, nutjob. Going home for the holidays.”
At that, Donghyuck flew out of bed and reached for his phone on the dresser. He turned on his phone to check the date, the light temporarily blinding him in the process.
“Shit, I completely forgot. When did he say he was leaving?” Donghyuck cursed, scrambling to rummage for a clean hoodie in the closet.
“In about 15 minutes. He said he’ll wait for you though. Doyoung is still getting ready too.” Yukhei replied, heading back out to the door as though it was the most urgent thing at the moment.
“Are you coming too?”
“Uh, no. Got extra practice today,” Yukhei replied shortly and makes his way out of the bedroom.
Weird, Donghyuck thinks. He doesn’t remember having ‘extra practice’ on any of his member’s schedules.
//
At the airport, Donghyuck was clingier onto Mark than usual, perching himself on his arm as he sent in his luggage, attaching himself to his hip when he ordered frappes for the trio at MacDonalds, to compensate for them getting up early on their day off to see him off at the airport.
He couldn’t help it. He and Mark were practically attached at the hip since the Canadian entered their practice room, with his thick framed glasses and braces in all its prepubescent glory. He couldn’t remember a single day when they were not together - except - well. Yukhei.
Donghyuck shoved the unpleasant memories from his mind, not wanting to acknowledge any of the confusion and mixed feelings that had been twisting at him for the past few months. He steeled himself to focus on the fact that his best friend was going to leave him for 2 weeks after 4 years of breathing the same air - he needed to make every moment last before his job as Mark’s Number One Irritation Instigator went on hiatus.
“What are you staring at?” Mark grinned at him, that adorable, dopey smile plastered on his stupid face.
Donghyuck gently shoved his face away in mock disgust. “Like anyone would look at you for a second, asshole.”
“Oh? But I didn’t say you were looking at my face though?” Donghyuck swore that Mark’s face could rival the sun. He could stare at it all day if his pride allowed. But it didn’t, and he wasn’t going to let Mark have the satisfaction of knowing that.
“God, you’re so lame.” And now he would like to mentally stab himself for such an awful comeback. He would never hear the end of it if Johnny heard him.
Shortly after Doyoung returned from his trip to the loo, his face pinched and muttering something about “imbeciles who don’t flush”. As soon as his butt touched the seat, the announcement blared across the departure hall, calling for Mark’s flight to start boarding.
The elder hopped onto his feet eagerly, the thought of seeing his hometown after being holed up in SM’s sweaty basement erasing any other thoughts on his mind.
“Do you really need to look so thrilled to leave us?” Donghyuck pouted, in spite of himself.
“Don’t look like that Yucky, it’s only a week,” Mark giggled, reaching out to pinch his cheek.
Donghyuck jerks his head away, rolling his eyes. “Who said anyone’s sad you’re leaving, idiot?,” he retorts, in a bid to salvage his dwindling self respect.
At that, Doyoung envelopes Mark into a bear (or mom hug), nagging plentiful reminders of whether he had brought enough winter clothing, earmuffs, sunscreen (The sun barely shines there Doyoung hyung!), and his portable charger into his ears.
“Don’t fret hyung, I’ll be okay. My whole family is there,” Mark laughed at Doyoung's overly worried expression, typical of the pseudo-mom of seventeen others in a group.
“Bye Yucky,” Mark outstretched an arm to hug him as he fumbled with his luggage on the other. Donghyuck lunged into his arms and flung his arms about his neck in a strangling hug, (read: affectionate chokehold) plastering an obnoxiously loud kiss onto his cheek. Mark convulses in disgust, almost dropping his suitcase as he aggressively wiped off the remnants of spit from his face with his sleeve jacket.
“Goddamit, keep it down Donghyuck, people are staring,” Doyoung rebuked, pulling Donghyuck by the hood to extricate him from Mark.
Donghyuck merely grins gleefully at Mark and raises his hand in goodbye. “I’ll miss you,” he manages out in his own broken, limited English, earning an oddly blank look from Mark. Then-
“I love you.”
Donghyuck merely stared, the first few moments of shock tranquilizing his thinking as his brain fumbled around those English words that he had heard and used so frequently about his fans. And then it hit him -
“Wait, what?!” he screeched as he reached out to grab Mark’s sleeve, but it’s too late, he’s gone into the gate in the fastest speed walk Donghyuck has ever seen anyone speedwalk in the history of speedwalking - all but luggage tag trailing after his wake.
//
Donghyuck is a mess.
He could only turn to one viable alternative lest he go delirious - Jaemin.
Donghyuckie:
I hATE MARK LEE MINHYUNG
nanananananA:
you love Mark Lee Minhyung
Donghyuckie:
yes isn’t that what i said
nanananananA:
….
Donghyuckie:
wait no
nanananananA:
make up yo goddam mind, yuckie
Donghyuckie:
I HATE HIM SO MUCH
DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID??
IMMA TELL YOU WHAT HE DID
nanananananA:
what did he do
.. this time?
Donghyuckie:
HE
FUCkINg
ok i’ll lay off caps now its kinda tiring
Ok anyway
He fuvcKING told me he loved me
In ENGLISH
HE SAID IT
HE SAID “I LOVE YOU” AT THE AIRPORT
AS HE WAS LEAVING
HE SAID I LOVE YOU TO ME
AND PROCEEDED TO FLY OFF
TO THE OTHER END OF THE FuKING WORLD
NOT ONE SECOND LATER
I HATE HIM
shit sorry i said i would lay off caps but IC NT HELP MYSELF
nanananananA:
wow that’s messed up dude
I cant believe he actually
got the balls to confess
Im gna go applaud him now
Donghyuckie:
NO NO JAEMIN DONT PLS
It was probably a mistake
He probably didn;t mean it
Its impossible
I texted him and asked him what the fuk he meant
He still hasnt replied
Im heartbroken
nanananananA:
don’ t be an idiot obv he means it
both of u are idiots
im gna tell him to man up and
that that is nOT the man way to
confess
Donghyuckie:
He can’t mean it
Its impossible
He probably meant it as a joke
Til he tells me its not
Its a joke
nanananananA:
your as dumb as he is
Donghyuckie:
*you’re
nanananananA:
fk off
Donghyuckie:
he doesn’t love me
tell me he doesn’t
nanananananA:
why the fk wld i do that
you know
yukhei didn’t get out of the way
for you two to continue being idiots
Donghyuckie:
wait
what the fuCK