Chapter Text
{ 4:22 PM - Thursday }
Group Chat
~ Dick Boys has added Pants, Queen, S, Fox, hamilton, squid kid, and Dicktective to the chat ~
~ Dick Boys has renamed the chat to This is a cry for help ~
Dick Boys: Welcome to the game.
Pants: Pardon
S: hey akira uhhhh what the eff is this
Dick Boys: Ryuji you know you can say fuck, right
S: fff
squid kid: go on, ryuji, say it
S: F
S: Eff
Dicktective: Sorry to rush the subject along but. Sakamoto, why is your name just "S"
S: i hit enter too early
hamilton: Oh, so it was a typo??
S: yea lol
Fox: He's made worse typos than that.
Pants: For example :
{ 3:01 AM - Tuesday }
RS: i love dicks??? i mean their heads are sort of cold sometimes but i think they're cute
RS: DUCKS FUCK I MEANT DUCKS
AT: DCCTGBKHJLK
S: ANN FUCKGGN TAKAMAKI
Queen: Ah, so he can say fuck.
S: what is this, be mean to ryuji day
~ Dick Boys has renamed the chat to bully ryuji day ~
Pants: FGFDGFHHG
Queen: Why would you know that ducks have cold heads in the first place
S: chasing them can be productive i guess
squid kid: wow what a big word!!!!
S: stfu
Dicktective: Wait
Dicktective: IS MY SCREENNAME DICKTECTIVE
Dick Boys: Wow great deduction skills !!!
Dicktective: Stfu who did this
Dick Boys: Oh my god who did this
Dick Boys: ((me))
Pants: It was the dick boys.............. of course,,,,......
hamilton: Petition to call our study group this instead of "learning to read"
Dicktective: I'm about to have a stroke how do I change this
S: sorry im blind?
Pants: My blinding homosexuality is a clouding my thoughts sorry idk how
Dick Boys: I can change it bb
Dicktective: idonttrustlikethat.jpg
Dicktective: But whatever it can't get any worse
~ Dick Boys has changed Dicktective's name to Light Yagami ~
Light Yagami: I was wrong
Dick Boys: I can be your L babe
Light Yagami: Meaning I get to slaughter you?
Queen: Akira, if you go missing we have evidence on who did it
Dick Boys: tbh id probably just be beating my meat in the dorm but i guess that you could blame akechi for that too
Fox: That's gay, Akira.
Pants: Do you beat your meat in front of mona
Pants: Actually never mind. i dont want to know about your jo sessions.
S: i do , so has the cat seen your dick or what
Dick Boys: no.
Dick Boys: And ryuji, that's gay
S: i am gay
Fox: Point taken.
squid kid: u arent special ryuji we're all gay here
Queen: Lesbian.
Pants: Pan
hamilton: Lesbian as well
S: we get it ladies, it's girls
Pants: I said pan ryucky
Dick Boys: RYUCKY
hamilton: ryucky sackimomo
Light Yagami: I cant believe Sakamoto is dead and that Ryucky killed him
Queen: We will now take this time to mourn for our dear pet, Ryuji Sakamoto.... He will be missed.
S: PET????????
S: STOP SAYING IM DEAD WEVE DONE THIS BEFORE
Light Yagami: It almost feels like he's still here sometimes......
~ S has left the chat ~
~ Dick Boys has added S to the chat ~
hamilton: Poor Ryucky...... To have to witness this....
Fox: I feel as if this is quite.... mean.
S: THANK YOU YUSUKE
Fox: To force our dear new friend into this situation is quite cruel, after all?
S: A. AAAAGHHHH
Dick Boys: IM SCREAMJNNG SNATCH THAT HO LMFAO
Pants: YUUSUKE.???? ZDVJK
S: im telling yu on all of you bullies >:(
Dick Boys: Uh oh, hes pulling out the >:( 's
Pants: >;3c
Queen: Ann Takamaki.
Pants: <:3c Yes?
Queen: Cease.
Pants: (΄◉◞౪◟◉｀)
S: What the fuck
hamilton: (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)
squid kid: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
Dick Boys: Um Futaba Sakura, a high school girl as yourself should not be using such rude gestures????,,
squid kid: ໒( . ͡° ͟ʖ ͡° . )७┌∩┐
Dick Boys: I
S: i cant believe akira is dead at futabas hands
squid kid: that jokes done now, ryucky stfu
Pants: Sorry to interrupt but guys quick uh question? how do i kill god?
Queen: What
Pants: God has cursed me with this gay and if i must kill her to be rid of it then so be it
Light Yagami: Why would you think that killing a nonexistent entity would get rid of the hormonal imbalances that cause homosexuality ? If "god" can't help us escape our own personal hells, than who's to say that killing it can get rid of your gay?
Pants: Um first of all, buddy, do you need to talk to someone?
Light Yagami: No
Pants: And also i think that god shouldn't have cursed me with this gay while having such a beautiful best friend that's all
S: aw thanks :)
Pants: not you
Dick Boys: You still screaming over Shiho?
Pants: YES. SHES SO PRETTY UGHH HAVE YOU EVER MET HER?
Dick Boys: Yea lol
Pants: It's like I know that we've been dating since high school but UM!!????? IM IN LOVE
Light Yagami: If you've been dating her then why would you want to get rid of the gay? Wouldn't that ruin your relationship, if you were straight?
Pants: I mean yeah but I'm a little too gay you know?
Light Yagami: I hate to break it to you, but I'm probably the gayest man I know
S: [ clears my big gay throat ]
S: sorry there was some cum in there because im really gay
Dick Boys: Sorry Ryucky, I don't think you can out-gay Light Yagami
Dick Boys: I mean his last name "im a gay" backwards?
squid kid: that joke is so dead that im tempted to kick you
Dick Boys: You can't kick me, I'm god!
~ squid kid has kicked Dick Boys from the chat ~
Light Yagami: Good riddance.
Queen: The evil is defeated.
Pants: okay but back to the gay? shiho is so pretty? i love her so much ygh i love waking up knowing that i can calll her and injjjjhnn
hamilton: That's very gay, Ann!
S: @ Fox : u love me like that?
Fox: No.
S: w
squid kid: WHATHHJGHJ
Fox: I believe it's very difficult to love someone in the same ways as another person? My love for you is more like knowing that you will be there to complain about the last episode of Stranger Things, and that you'll pay for my bus fair when I've spent all of my money. It's the fact that even when you've had a terrible day you'll still be there to speak to everyone and help them out. It's that you're there, and that you will never change because you're you, and I love that you. I love you, Ryuji Sakamoto.
S: wh
S: what the fuck imcrying fuck
squid kid: im... impressed, inari
S: yusuke cang i come ober
S: *can *over
Fox: I hope that I did not upset you. But yes, why would you need to ask????
S: thankhs
~ S has gone offline ~
Fox: ? Did I say something wrong?
Pants: No ryujis just a big dumb gay who loves u smh
Pants: Im cryin too
Fox: Oh.
Fox: It looks as if Ryuji is here. I will talk to you all later :)
~ Fox has gone offline ~
Pants: OH MY GOD HE USED A SMILEY????
Queen: If Ryuji wasn't so emotionally constipated that conversation could've been much smoother.
hamilton: You know he can read these, right??????
Queen: I do.
hamilton: But!!! Since everyone is expressing their adoration I guess I can say that I love you Makoto !!!!
Queen: HH
Pants: WOAH
Queen: I. I love you too, Haru.
hamilton: !!!!!! <3
Pants: awwwwwwww
squid kid: you guys don't even know my gf but shout out to her lol love u kana
Pants: Nice ! Now it's yagami's turn to confess his love for someone . add akira into the chat again
Light Yagami: Alright.
~ Light Yagami has added Dick Boys to the chat ~
Light Yagami: Fuck you
~ Light Yagami has kicked Dick Boys from the chat ~
Pants: i see
squid kid: understandable, have a great day
Queen: Im glad everyone here can be so open about their feelings and love lives.
hamilton: I love Love Live!!!!!
squid kid: im stopping this here. no idol things allowed.
Pants: noescape.jpg
squid kid: watch me.
~ this chat has been abolished ~