Work Text:
December 1976
Lily took in a steadying breath as she slowed to a more sedated walk. She glanced up the sidewalk scanning for street signs. Neither the names going to her right or the number continuing on ahead looked particularly familiar. She didn’t know Birmingham very well after all, it wasn’t surprising she didn’t know the cross streets. After a moment of thought she turned back around the way she had come from. Retracing her steps, that was the way to go.
As she walked Lily pulled her jacket closer around her against the December chill which made itself felt as her heart beat slowed. She glanced up at the sky which gloomed grey overhead. There was plenty of smoke in the air and clouds weren’t unusual but something of the dull gray edge on the cloudbank spoke of snow. She sped up slightly, glancing around. There had been a traffic circle and several turnings. The shop had been close to the city center. She was sure of that much.
The shop in question was a fine dress maker. Lily was unsure of its pedigree but Petunia had insisted on driving all the way into Birmingham, over an hour from Cokeworth. Lily had reason to believe that it was only at her mother’s insistence that Petunia hadn’t dragged them all the way to London in search of a wedding dress.
Lily started to speed up again. She was fairly certain she was going in the right direction. The row that had driven her out of the shop was a bit of a blur but she was fairly certain she remembered yelling “fine just leave without me,” as she stormed out. Petunia wouldn’t be thick enough to take her at her word though. Of course not. What kind of person would leave their kid sister stranded in a strange city far from home? Lily cursed inwardly and broke into a trot. She had to get back to the shop.
Lily rushed past a familiar looking traffic circle and a street she thought she remembered. She was feeling fairly confident as she took a few turns and stepped out onto a broad road full of shops and festooned in Christmas lights. Lily glanced frantically around. Nothing here was familiar. Panic rose slow and dense in her stomach.
She was suddenly sharply aware that she was alone out in the world. Aside from the normal problems presented by this there was the consistently darkening reality of the wizarding world. Looking around at the festive Muggle shops it was not evident but the world was growing more dangerous of late. Lily suddenly remembered what a bad idea it was to be out alone. She felt her wand against her leg and her mind whirred with a new sense of urgency.
Lily glanced around the crowded streets. She couldn’t remember the name of the dress shop but she could picture it. And how many shops selling wedding dresses could there be in one city? Lily glanced up and down the street and selected a small non-threatening old woman, who reminded her of her grandmother.
“Excuse me, ma’am?”
The woman glanced up at Lily as she stepped into her path. “Yes, dear, did you need something?”
“Um. I’m looking for a dress shop. It sells wedding dresses. But I don’t remember what it’s called.” Lily paused thinking. “It’s got a white front and a sign with gold lettering. It’s near here.”
The woman smiled. “I know the very place. You’re nearly there.” Lily let out a tense breath. “Just go down two blocks and turn right. You can’t miss it.”
“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” Lily briefly fought an urge to hug the woman. Instead she turned and hurried off down the street feeling suddenly light.
Lily raced down the two blocks and took the turn a little too hard almost running into a family out doing their Christmas shopping. And there it was, a white shop with gold trim and some fancy dresses in the window. And it was completely unfamiliar.
Lily stood frozen for a moment. A rational part of her brain sighed and pointed out that white and gold were wedding colors, but she barely registered it.
Full blown panic rose up in Lily’s stomach. She felt her breathing quicken. She was lost and Petunia was surely already gone. She was alone, in a strange city. Lily picked a direction and started walking. She took a few sharp turns. She had definitely backtracked. She couldn’t be too far from where she started.
Six turns later Lily was forced to stop at a light. Immediately upon coming to a halt she realized that running in circles was not helpful. She internally chastised herself. Options. She had to think about options.
She felt her pockets. Wand, wallet with no money. That limited her options pretty heavily. She looked around the street she was on. She was away from the shops now, in a more residential area. Lily thought briefly about finding an ally to hide in where she could cast a spell but she quickly put it from her mind. The trace was still active and she didn’t need to get arrested or whatever happened in these sorts of situations. She could summon the night bus but she couldn’t get on without any wizard money. She couldn’t get a taxi without Muggle money, and a cross county taxi ride would be astronomically expensive. Lily took a deep calming breath.
A phone. That was the thing. Shops had phones, maybe they would let her use one. That would work. Just turn up the charm and look pitiable. It was nearly Christmas after all.
Lily turned to retrace her steps, feeling a little better. She would call home and get her parents help. They could come get here. This would mean an hour’s drive each way when they were trying to set up for Christmas. Lily felt a little bad about that, but it couldn’t be helped. This was Petunia’s fault after all.
A small voice in the back of Lily’s head muttered something about her being the one who had stormed out but she ignored it. Petunia had been baiting her. After nearly 17 years of being a big sister Petunia knew what buttons to press. She would play that element up. She was sure she wouldn’t be in trouble. Well, pretty sure. Her parents would definitely be annoyed, that was only natural. Lily sighed and took a turn she was pretty sure would lead her to a main street with some shops on it.
Lily walked quickly for a few blocks doubt slowly growing in her mind. She was pretty sure she was running circles around the same square mile; it shouldn’t be this easy to get lost. She cursed the gentle curve of the streets as she slowed to a standstill. Once again she didn’t recognize any street signs. She sighed and dropped heavily onto the curb.
Lily sat with her feet in the gutter and her head in her hands. She felt cars rumble by in front of her occasionally. She had to think. That was the thing. She could figure a way out of this. There had to be a way. She could knock on doors. Ask where she was and maybe get someone to let her use the telephone.
“Hey Evans.”
Lily glanced up in sudden shock right into the face of Sirius Black, her fellow Gryffindor. He was leaning out of the window of a small car stopped in the street in front her. Lily stood up and peered into the car. Beyond Sirius in the driver’s seat was Remus Lupin and in the back seat sat James Potter and Peter Pettigrew.
A series of conflicting emotions ran through Lily in rapid succession; relief, reflexive annoyance, embarrassment and a small flair of joy. She was found. She wished it wasn’t the so-called Marauders, but anyone was better than being stranded in the middle of Birmingham. Lily ignored the mix of annoyance and happiness at the appearance of her fellow Gryffindors. The annoyance was old, and something she was trying to move past for her own sanity. The happiness was new, and something she was not quite sure what to make of yet.
Lily affected an air of nonchalance. “Black.”
“Crying in the gutter’s a good look on you.”
“Gee thanks, Black.”
She walked up to the car and leaned around Sirius. “How are you, Remus?”
“Fine. Are you doing okay?”
Lily laughed slightly, “Well if you must know, I’m a bit stranded.”
“Do you not live around here?” that was James on her right.
“Careful, I don’t know if you want Jamsie to know where you live,” that was Sirius on her left.
Lily rolled her eyes but chose to ignore this. “I live in Cokeworth.” The comment was greeted with a car full of blank stares. After a moment she saw a comprehension dawn in Peter’s eyes.
“Isn’t that like a couple hours away?”
Lily felt herself deflate a little. “I have no idea how I’m getting home.”
The back door of the car swung open, almost hitting her in the side. James was already out indicating the back seat. “We could get you back.”
“How’s that now?” asked Sirius still leaned most of the way out of the front window.
James waved his hand airily, but extremely close to Sirius’ face. Sirius just laughed, apparently no longer requiring an answer to his question. Lily thought it was a good one, though.
“How about it, Potter?”
“Well I mean, I’m not sure that we could get you all the way home but we can figure something out.” She continued to peer as he seemed to grow increasingly flustered under his gaze. “Hey I’m just trying to help here.”
“Well sure, Potter, and I’m trying to understand if you can actually provide any help.”
“Well, I can. Or I mean, Remus…” He turned over his shoulder, “could your parents maybe do something?”
Remus looked pleased. “Yeah, I live right near here.”
“Now hold on a second.” Sirius Black pushed himself further out the window, nearly standing in the car, and physically inserting himself into the conversation, “I’m not letting you two side track me again.”
“What did I do?” Lily asked feeling she had missed something.
“Not you Evans, these two.” Black gesticulated at Remus and James nearly dropping himself out the car window in the process. “They’ve been conspiring against me all week.”
“Well, we can’t leave her stranded here,” James said stepping protectively forward. Lily rolled her eyes.
“Thanks for advocating for me Potter but I’m okay, really.” She was pleased to see him take a step back looking slightly abashed.
“I suppose we can take her with us,” sighed Remus.
“I don’t know.” Sirius narrowed his eyes at her. “Can she be trusted?”
“I trust her,” said James sturdily.
“Me too,” called Peter from the other side of the back seat.
“Gee thanks, but I’m not sure I want to be dragged into whatever you’re getting up to,” said Lily, suddenly nervous. Poorly supervised Marauders at Hogwarts were bad enough, but totally unsupervised Marauders in the middle of a Muggle city was another thing. And in a car for some reason.
“We’re not up to anything,” Remus earnestly intoned from the driver’s side.
“Exactly,” Sirius supplied ominously, “Nothing to see here.”
“See I felt better for a second but now I feel worse again,” Lily said to Sirius.
“I’m starting to think you don’t entirely trust me, Evans.”
“Gee you think, Black?”
“I’m hurt, Evans.”
“I feel like you’re not helping, Padfoot,” James interjected quietly.
“Oh posh,” Sirius waved his hand dismissively, “Me and Evans have an understanding.” He turned his focus on Lily. “So are you coming or not?”
“Well if Remus’ parents have a phone I could use or something I would appreciate it,” Lily admitted guardedly.
“I neither know what that is nor do I care,” Sirius said imperiously. “The important thing is…”
“Isn’t a phone that thing that made the loud noise while you were holding it?” James’ face had slid into a mischievous grin.
“Not important,” Said Sirius, suddenly avoiding eye contact.
“Was it, Remus?” James leaned around into the car.
“Yeah, that was it,” Remus responded a slight acid in his tone.
Sirius dramatically threw his hands up in the air. “And I said I was sorry, Moony!”
Lily glanced between the boys. “What happened?”
“Nothing,” Sirius grunted, “I just got a bit startled is all.”
“He threw the phone half way across the room and screamed like a banshee is what happened,” said James with relish.
“I was startled,” Sirius snapped, “I don’t know anything about Muggle technology, okay?”
Sirius looked so put out that Lily had to stifle a laugh. James and Peter didn’t bother with the stifling. Inside the car Remus looked half-annoyed half-fond at the back of Sirius’ head.
“Look are you coming with us or not? We can take you back to Remus’ after we do… stuff,” Sirius looked shifty at the last.
“Well look, will you tell me what you’re up to first?” Lily asked.
“No. And you have to take a vow of secrecy. You will carry what you see to your grave.” Lily was pretty sure Sirius was having her on but he could look deadly serious with the best of them. She sighed.
“How else are you going to get back to Cokeworth?” Peter interjected from the other side of the car.
This brought Lily’s train of thought to a screeching halt. She had been so caught up in the familiar high energy of the group that she had momentarily forgotten she was stranded. She paused a moment starring at the boys. “Okay but I’m not sitting in the middle.”
“And you’ll swear to secrecy?” asked Sirius.
“Not on your life,” she shot back. “Get in the car Potter.”
James was fairly tall and watching him fold himself into the center seat was rather amusing. Peter got on the wrong end of an elbow and Lily waited for the resulting shoving to subside before sliding into the back seat. Most of Sirius’ body was still hanging out of the window. He banged on the roof imperiously.
“Drive on, Moony!” he ordered. Remus rolled his eyes and leaned across the seat grabbing a handful of the back of Sirius’ jacket. With a sharp tug he dragged Sirius back into the car, the later almost cracking his skull on the door and huffing indignantly.
“I can’t drive with you out there,” Remus said calmly. “It’s not allowed and it’s not safe.”
“I don’t know why we hang out with a wet blanket like you,” Sirius muttered.
“You know you love me,” Remus responded. Sirius rolled his eyes and defiantly stuck his head a little way out of the window.
James leaned forward into the front seat. “Are you two done? Can we go?” Remus sighed and put the car into gear. Sirius stuck his head a little further out the window. Lily couldn’t help but grin a little at this scene.
“You’re like a dog, Sirius, I swear,” she quipped. This comment was apparently the height of mirth according to the Marauders. They all howled with laughter and Lily had to scoot a little way away from James as he was shaking so hard.
Lily say back into her seat and felt herself relax. This was alright. A year before she would not have thought she would ever be glad to see the Gryffindor boys from here year again. They had become loud and obnoxious with a tendency to pick fights. This year, however, something had happened that seemed to mellow them. There had been a few weeks of palpable quiet tension that seemed to permeate Gryffindor tower and Sirius Black seemed, uncharacteristically, to be on his own a lot. And then the tension had passed like a storm and left calm behind it. Whatever had happened it had allowed her to talk to them occasionally without feeling like she wanted to strangle them.
If Lily was honest with herself she’d never totally dislike them. They had been in close proximity since they were eleven. She was very used to them, a fact that was really being driven home at the moment. With all four of them fighting to be heard over the others this was probably the loudest car she had ever been in, but the cacophony of noise was comforting rather than annoying. At some point in the last five and a half years these people had become a safe comfortable thing, an element of home.
“You look pleased,” James said quietly to Lily, breaking into her thoughts. Glancing up she realized that a small smile had been playing on her lips, and that she had been staring a bit.
“Yeah well, I was lost in Birmingham and now I’m not,” Lily allowed.
“Yeah, I guess we did save you, huh? Very heroic of us,” James’ grin grew wider.
“Well, I’ll allow that Remus did a nice thing, since he’s the one with the car,” said Lily, trying not to roll her eyes.
“I suggested that you come with us.”
“Yeah to your unknown and probably questionably legal destination,” Lily replied.
“Now hold on you were just glad to be with us a second ago. If you’re not careful I might think you’ve taken a bit of a set against me,” said James, holding back his smile in an attempt to look put upon.
The phrase I wonder why that would be flashed momentarily through Lily’s mind but there was no heat their anymore. Glancing at James she saw his gaze falter for a moment, catching the tension coming off her. “Well, I wouldn’t want it to go to your head anyway,” she responded, trying to sound teasing.
James let out a gasp so melodramatic it very nearly made her jump. “Me, an ego? Never.”
“Uh huh,” Lily turned the disbelief in her expression up as far as it would go.
“Besides it’s not an ego if I’m actually that great,” he said grin in full force again.
“You are at best adequate.”
“Oh please have you met me?”
“Unfortunately.”
“Ouch, Evans. I thought us Gryffindors had to stick together,” James clutched his heart in mock agony.
“Right, so where are we going?”
James turned an inserted himself bodily into the front seat again. “Sirius, Evans wants to know where we’re going.”
Sirius turned full around in his seat and started to get up on his knees but Lupin physically pulled him back down into his seat. “Seatbelt, Sirius. That’s lesson one remember?”
Sirius buckled his seat belt quickly and twisted around as far as the restraint would allow. “We’ll tell you nothing!” he barked back at her.
Lupin rolled his eyes at Lily in the review mirror. “You know she’s going to find out pretty soon, right Sirius?”
“Never,” Said Sirius defiantly.
“What is the point of withholding it anyway?” Remus asked, exasperated.
Lily leaned around James’ back to where Peter sat watching the drama in the front seat. “Hey Peter, where are we going?”
Peter shrugged. James sat suddenly back into the back seat causing Lily to pull back sharply to avoid being sat on. “You heard Sirius,” he said with a mock serious sternness.
“Come on Potter, where are we going?” Lily said trying her most winning smile.
“Now Lily, trust is very important in relationships. Sirius trusts me with his many many secrets and I would be a fool to violate that trust,” said James sounding strangely professorial.
“Well, what about trusting me?” Lily rejoined.
“What about you trusting me?”
“I think we both know I am more trustworthy than you.”
“Oh that hurts. I’m very good at keeping secrets.”
Lily paused to consider this for the briefest moment. “I don’t doubt that in certain ways. But I’m not a Marauder so I’m not sure that helps me any.”
This comment seemed to take the wind out of James’ sails a bit. “Well it’s dark times these days. You have to know who to trust.”
“Right and I’m just saying I don’t think I’m it for you.”
“Of course I trust you Lily.”
“Well you don’t really show it any. And I’m not sure I trust you. With our history and all.”
“Oh right, that,” James muttered to himself.
The two of them had gotten closer and quieter as they spoke. Now a loaded silence settled over them. Despite her annoyance, Lily had liked bickering with James for a long time. He was smart and quick witted. They were natural competitors in terms of grades and while their attitudes on authority were opposite their overall worldviews were fairly similar. This had made him an ideal sparring partner and while they were never friends they had certainly developed a certain dynamic that Lily enjoyed very much.
And then had come the year where James had decided that he was an adult which apparently meant he was also a jackass. He had become a bully and had decided that he must be absolutely in the right all the time. On top of all of this he had decided that they should date and had refused to let it drop for several months. Totally aside from the fact that this had made him a poor debate partner, wrecking the whole bases of their rapport, it had made him total insufferable to be around. Lily hadn’t realized how much she actually liked her housemate until she started to hate him.
But whatever had mellowed the Marauders in the previous months had seemed to hit James the hardest. He was still as wild as ever but he seemed more aware of others. The basic valuing of fairness and kindness that had made them similar when they were kids seemed to have reasserted itself rather dramatically. More than that he seemed more empathetic than before and less possessed with his own cleverness. Lily was still wary of celebrating too soon but it seemed like she had gotten an old friend back, which was something she really needed at the moment.
Under Lily’s gaze James seemed to grow more self-conscious. He ran his fingers through his hair a muttered dropped his eyes. “Have I mentioned that I was an asshole last year?”
“You hadn’t,” Lily allowed.
“Well, I was.”
“Funnily enough, I did notice,” Lily said allowing herself a slight smile.
James grinned back gratefully. “So are we good?”
Lily felt her eyebrows shoot to her hairline, “Just like that? After everything?”
“I… I mean…” James stuttered clearly a bit caught off guard. He collected himself a moment. “Fair point,” he cautiously allowed.
Lily relaxed a little. “Things take time, James,” she watched his face closely for a reaction. After a moment he nodded and smiled more genuinely than usual. For some reason Lily felt compelled to elaborate. “I think I’d like to be over it but if I’m honest I’m at about seventy percent at the moment.”
An odd expression passed over James’ face and for a moment Lily would have sworn his eyes flicked up to the front seat where Sirius sat. “I know that feeling.” A question hovered on the tip of Lily’s tongue and she was about to give in and ask.
“We’re here.” Remus announced from the front seat cutting through the moment.
Sirius immediately bolted out of the car into what, as far as Lily could tell was a largely deserted grocery store parking lot. Remus got out more slowly. Lily reached for her door handle but Peter and James didn’t seem to be moving at all. Lily glance curiously at James. “What are we doing here?”
Suddenly Sirius and Remus were climbing back in the car. It took Lily a moment to realize that they had switched sides.
“Okay what now?” said Sirius looking at Remus.
“What was the first lesson?” replied Remus adopting an authoritative voice.
“Oh right.” Sirius quickly buckled his seatbelt.
“Um... What are we doing?” Asked Lily, trying to keep the apprehension out of her voice.
“Teaching Sirius to drive,” supplied James. In the front seat Remus was talking Sirius through the clutch and gear shift.
“Why?”
“Sirius wants to know how to drive one of those Muggle things,” said James.
“Motorcycle,” Sirius barked from the front seat.
“Right and Remus said he had to learn car first,” James supplied.
“I think when Remus said he would help over break he was hoping Sirius would forget by then,” Peter said slyly.
Remus seemed unabashed. “It’s worked before.”
Sirius threw him a look. “Like I said, this is happening. Just embrace it. What now?”
“Well remember we talked about gas and break? The pedals?” asked Remus. Sirius nodded. “Well then push down on the gas pedal very gently.” Remus emphasized the last two words with a sharp finger.
Lily braced herself and for a moment the tension in the car was palpable, but Sirius was apparently listening to Remus for once. The car gave a very slight jerk and started to inch forward. Lily relaxed for a moment before jumping nearly out of her skin when James Potter let out a deafening scream approximately six inches from her ear.
“You’re doing it Padfoot! We’re moving!”
“Well, barely,” Lily allowed but her comment was lost in the sudden cacophony. James continued to cheer and Peter took up the cry as well. From the front seat Sirius started crowing seemingly astounded at his own genius. Lily couldn’t help but grin as the car packed to the brim with screaming teenagers inched across the empty parking lot at about two kilometers per hour.
“Okay Sirius, I want you to turn down this row. See the white lines? Try not to touch them,” Remus instructed. Immediately an intense expression appeared on Sirius’ face. “Turn signal first,” Remus chided.
As Sirius fumbled to flip the signal on in the proper direction (Lily counted three tries before he got it right) James and Peter kept up a constant barrage of encouragement from the back seat. As Lily watched James glanced over at her and threw her a wide grin.
“Gryffindors got to support each other, right?” he said quietly. Lily felt herself return his grin.
“Come on Sirius! You can do it!” She shouted. As Sirius started to inch the car into the turn James, laughing, stuck his hands up like he was on a roller coaster and Lily, who found herself laughing too, followed suit.
As the car continued down the row at a very low speed Lily leaned up into the front seat. “Why so slow, Sirius?”
“Called out!” James yelled from over her shoulder.
“I gave him a talk about killing us all,” supplied Remus. “He values my life, and possibly James’, even if he doesn’t mind constantly risking his own.”
“Well then, I’m glad you’re here. I was sure we were going to wind up hitting something immediately.”
Remus smiled and turned back to Sirius. “You could go a bit faster than this. Just be gentle with it.”
Sirius glanced over at Remus and for just a moment Lily saw laughter flicker through Sirius’ eyes, and then she was pitched backwards into the back seat. Lily felt her elbow graze James’ face and then landed part way on him. She quickly disentangled herself from him and scooted back into her seat. James, who appeared to be perfectly all right, immediately launched into hysterics.
“I’ve been wounded!” He yelled up at the front seat, clutching his face, “You’ve killed me Black! Remus was right, this thing is a menace.”
After collecting herself Lily realized that despite the sharp acceleration they still weren’t going very fast. Even so they ran out of parking lot very quickly and a wall was leaping up toward them.
“Break!” bellowed Remus. Lily had a moment more to brace this time and managed not to pitch to far forward as the car stopped sharply. There was a moment of silence and Lily could see Remus momentarily collecting himself. “What the hell, Sirius,” he snapped.
“That was awesome,” James declared simultaneously from the back seat. “Let’s go again!”
Remus turned around in his seat looking thunderous which silenced James but set Lily off laughing. She laughed wildly, as much to burn off adrenalin, as at Remus’ expression. After a moment James joined in. She looked over at him and his own mirth only seemed to increase hers. As she approached hysterics she could feel the whole rotten day draining out of her. As she doubled up she grabbed James for support pitching him sideways into Peter, who let out an undignified squeak. This set Sirius off and even Remus let out a small snort.
As James and Lily gasped themselves into silence leaning heavily against each other Remus rolled his eyes. “You two are a bad influence on each other, I swear.”
James ignored him and instead addressed Sirius. “How fast do you think that was?”
Sirius shrugged. “How should I know?”
“What do you mean how should you know? There’s a whole dial for that right in front of you,” snapped Lily leaning into the front seat again to point. Peter, James and Sirius all turned toward Remus who had the decency to look a little abashed.
“Okay, so I forgot to explain one thing,” he allowed.
“Some teacher you are,” muttered Sirius.
“Well let’s try it again. And this time try to get that dial to point at the twenty. And remember to accelerate gently,” said Remus. Sirius complied and fairly soon he was driving laps around the parking lot with reasonable efficiency.
They kept at it, driving circles around the deserted parking lot until the snow Lily had seen in the clouds started coming lightly down and Remus declared it time to go home. After minor protest Sirius relinquished the driver’s seat and they were on their way to Remus’. As they drove Sirius turned around in the seat to face Lily.
“Remember you swore secrecy. You saw nothing today,” said Sirius imperiously.
“I did no such thing!” Lily snapped. “I very specifically refused to do that.”
“Seriously though, Lily,” Remus added earnestly, “as far as my parents know I’m the only one driving their car.”
Lily grinned, “Being a bit bad, Remus?”
James patted Remus on the shoulder. “He is a Marauder, you know.”
Sirius, still turned around in his seat, looked unconvinced. “You’re not going to rat our boy out, are you?”
Lily glanced around the car at the Marauders. “Well, I suppose not. Us Gryffindors have to stick together, after all.”