Work Text:
Phoenix Wright had made a reservation for Régal, a French restaurant whose name meant “delight” or “cause of joy”, for the day after Maya's planned proposal to the love of her life, Franziska Von Karma. And he was almost as ecstatic as Maya when she called and confirmed that the Interpol Agent had said yes, not that he was surprised.
“A wife! I'm going to have a wife, Nick!” Maya shouted, which Phoenix was grateful for since his tears of joy were making it a bit hard to stay focused.
“And not just any wife, the prettiest, smartest, all around best wife in the world! No, the universe! The best one in this plane of existence and the next!” She was spinning in the middle of Franziska's foyer as her fiance watched her lovingly from the couch, too full of dopamine to even fake an eye roll.
Phoenix sniffed, already on his third tissue to clear away the waterworks and accompanying snot. “I'm so happy for you two!” He said amid the waterfall, and although the words were a bit distorted, the sentiment was clear.
“You're such a sap! How are you crying even more than me?” Maya teased, her grin plastered to her face.
“I can't help it! Am I not supposed to be happy for my best friend?!” The words were a bit more befuddled this time, but Maya got the gist of it. Phoenix's boyfriend however, was completely lost. Edgeworth smiled bemusingly and put his arm over the crying attorney, careful to keep it out of the snot splash zone.
“Darling, I have no idea what you're saying; Therefore, I highly doubt that the soon to be Misses Fey is able to,”
“Ohmygosh i forgot to ask,” Phoenix poorly whispered to Edgeworth as he placed his hand over the microphone.
“Are you going to change your name?” He tried to sound nonchalant but his eagerness was obvious.
“I,” Maya paused in a happy silence. “Don't know yet. We're still debating the details,” she had finally sat down next to her fiance, who planted a kiss on her cheek before wrapping both arms around the one that Maya was holding up to her ear. She made a sweet face, which she reserved only for Maya's eyes, which Maya knew meant she wanted her to hang up the phone and cuddle.
“Listen, Fran wants-”
“Say no more, just remember that we're picking both of you up tomorrow for a celebration dinner at six!” The hopeless romantic was still choked up, but at least he was understandable. Edgeworth made a pointed gesture at his watch.
“Sharp, Edgeworth says. The reservation is for 6:15 and that place is very hoity-toity,”
“Doesn't your boyfriend think that's a swear word?” Maya quipped, still thrilled that the pair had finally started dating about two months ago.
“Ha. Franziska does realize she's marrying your snark as well?”
“Phoenix Wright, are you insulting my future wife?” Franziska interjected, after Maya had handed her the phone. She was doing her best to sound angry and aggressive, but she was so happy Phoenix could hear her smiling.
“Absolutely. Congrats you two, and goodnight.”
Franziska grumbled unhappily as she pulled the phone from her face, frustrated that Phoenix was no longer as scared of her as she wished.
“Night, you lovebirds!” Maya yelled, as Phoenix hit the end call button.
“I cannot believe you want that fool to be your best man,” Franziska teased, twirling Maya's hair.
“Would you rather I picked Pearly, the even more hopeless romantic who is trying to insist that you wear a ballgown and ride a white horse?” Maya spoke softer, moving her face close for a kiss.
“Fair point. I guess it doesn't matter whom you pick, love. As long as you're there that is all i care about,” And she kissed her, hoping to somehow communicate how much she truly loved the spirit medium in a way that words never could.
*****
Edgeworth had picked up Phoenix, who looked dashing in a dark Navy suit instead of his usual bright attire. Edgeworth had also uncharacteristically dressed in a more reserved deep purple suit and vest, which looked dark enough that it almost appeared black. They picked up the pair at precisely six, and both were dressed to the nines as well. Franziska wore a black vest, suit jacket and long black skirt with gold trim, while Maya wore an elaborate sapphire blouse complete with a caplet and chocolate brown slacks.
“Wow, Nick! I almost didn't see you there! Since when do you wear colors fit for a real adult?”
“Since when do you wear anything but your uniform? Especially something that looks like you're about to walk down a runway,” Phoenix grinned.
“I know right? Fran knows a couple designers and actually got this as a gift just for me!” She squeaked in glee, and held Franziska’s hand.
As usual, the two prosecutor's had nodded to each other as a greeting and said little else during the car ride, both content to let their more boisterous half carry the conversation.
When they parked at the restaurant, Phoenix tried to get out of the car to open Maya's door, and was promptly whipped in the hand by Franziska. He yelped.
“I am the only gentleman she needs, fool.”
And Phoenix rolled his eyes, not willing to admit aloud how touched he was by Franziska's love in fear of further punishment.
The four of them began to walk to the door, before Maya swore and began to run back to the car because she'd left her purse behind. Franziska followed, and Edgeworth unlocked the car.
“I'll lock the car door after you've opened it, so just remember to shut it before meeting us inside,” Edgeworth called, and Franziska nodded.
Phoenix was rubbing his hand to try and relieve some of the pain.
“Seems like she's finally warming up to you,” Edgeworth teased.
“Yeah, she only whipped me once for besmirching her honor or whatever.”
Edgeworth exhaled with a chuckle, and blushed lightly as Phoenix opened the door for him. He still wasn't quite used to Phoenix's determination to make almost every situation romantic. Although he finally felt comfortable holding hands in public, and gently grabbed Phoenix on the way in.
They made their way to the host's podium, where a painfully average white man was writing on a notepad with a fountain pen.
“Wright, reservation at 6:15 for four,” Edgeworth was always touched by how cheery and kind Phoenix was to strangers.
“Wonderful. Thanks for being on time. I'll have a waiter seat you in a minute,” the man's customer service voice was transparent; he clearly did not want to be here. He started to walk away to grab someone, but paused.
"Look, it's your choice and I don't care, but there are kids here." The restaurant host said just a bit too loudly, in a falsely sympathetic tone.
"Sorry," Edgeworth responded almost by instinct, anxiety and embarrassment swirling in his gut. He let go of Phoenix's hand gently, his now empty hand felt like It weighed a ton.
"Excuse me?" Phoenix stood up tall, and grabbed his boyfriend's hand back defiantly. His eyes were narrowed, and his tone of voice truly begged the host to try him.
The host lowered their voice, with the ludicrous idea that being quieter would help prevent embarrassment for the men. "Just keep it family friendly, okay? I don't care that you're involved but it's my job to make everything comfortable for the other guests."
"Is it now?" Phoenix said, not lowering his voice even a little. Edgeworth was stunned silent, mixed between a desire to go and hide in the nearest cave and a fluttering in his chest because he was truly touched by Phoenix's bravery.
"Phil, is it?" Phoenix smiled with bitter resentment, reading the blonde man’s name tag.
"I'd recommend that you grab your manager immediately, unless you want to handle the pending lawsuit personally," and without missing a beat, he pulled a crisp business card out of his wallet. The host flushed red, and definitely looked angry enough to say something, but he bit his tongue and left without saying a word to anyone else in line. As the man's intentionally heavy footsteps faded, Phoenix's smile grew like he was already behind the bench in court.
Subconsciously, Edgeworth had grasped at his cravat like he was a rich white lady clutching her pearls, and lowered the hand once he realized.
"Now then," Phoenix turned, still holding Edgeworth's hand just a little too tight. "I don't think I've ever been happier to see you Franziska.
She was two couples behind them, holding her whip taught in her hand with her face contorted into a deadly snarl. Maya had a hand grasping the woman's shoulder, mouth completely agape. To someone who didn't know the pair it might've appeared like Maya was simply supporting her fiance, but a closer look showed how her nails were almost embedded into her shoulder just to hold her back.
"Maya, would you mind meeting us by the car?" Edgeworth said in a slightly softer than usual tone. He felt like his soul had left his body and he was watching everything from a distance.
The spirit medium nodded, and he gave a quick glance at Phoenix who let go of his hand so he could walk back and give her the keys. He didn't dare meet Franziska's eyes.
Perhaps because of the tense situation, Phoenix had to fight of laughter at the sight of Maya tugging at her fiance like an owner with a dog on a leash.
"They will require someone to corroborate their story," Franziska said with gritted teeth, and the couple closest to her in line notably stepped to the side as she strode forward, locking eyes with the host who was on his way back. The terror in his eyes was palpable, and Franziska grinned like a lioness stalking its prey. He actually ran back into the kitchen, nearly colliding with a busboy who was leaving.
Phoenix looked back at her and for a moment the two shared a look of pure petty joy which utterly terrified their partners. If Edgeworth hadn't been pale before, he certainly was now.
"Franziska, I implore you to consider-"
"Leaving? I will do no such thing, fool."
Edgeworth looked to Maya with desperation and she just shrugged, now past the phase of being worried about Fransiska murdering someone in public and instead a little too excited to watch whatever was going to happen. All she was missing was some popcorn.
Edgeworth's face fell. "Just don't injure anyone, please."
"And ruin your chance in court? Perish the thought, ” she sounded like the human embodiment of the Venus Fly Trap. And worse, Phoenix had a similar deviant glint in his eye.
Edgeworth took a moment to pray to the Goddess of Law that this would end without Franziska turning anyone into a corpse. He could feel the burning eyes from some of the gawkers at nearby tables, likely excited from hearing the word lawsuit, and wished that Trucy had come with them because she could've easily made him disappear.
Maya noticed his incredibly pale face, and gently set a hand on his shoulder.“
It'll be fine Edgeworth. Unless you pass out because you haven't taken a breath in a couple minutes,” Maya teased playfully, trying her damnedest to lower the tension and the chief prosecutor’s blood pressure.
He exhaled shakily at the breath he didn't know he'd been holding, and tried earnestly to believe Maya's words. Which lasted until the host appeared again, trailing behind an older woman in a suit which he assumed was the manager on duty.
Her hair was braided behind her back, and she wore an obviously fixed smile. The bags under her eyes made it clear that she hadn't had a decent night's sleep in quite some time. Edgeworth immediately felt sorry for her, knowing that Franziska wouldn't take her innocence and exhaustion into account.
“Good evening, what seems to be the problem?” She spoke in a lighter tone that didn't match her appearance.
“Your pathetic excuse for a host made some callous homophobic remarks to my brother and his boyfriend,” Franziska said with poison oozing from every syllable.
Edgeworth winced in the background, already worried that things were going to get spectacularly ugly.
Without hesitation or noticeable intimidation, the manager looked to her side and maintained her fixed smile, looking a notch more annoyed than she had a moment before.
“Is this true Paul?”
The man shook his head, still convinced he was in the right. “I simply asked for those two gentlemen to limit their displays of affection to more appropriate places.” Phoenix's eye twitched in anger. He let himself visualize strangling the wretched man
“We were simply holding hands, as is our legal right to do so,” Phoenix’s voice grated, his entire body was visibly tense. “There is nothing inappropriate about that”
Franziska cracked her whip on the ground and was delighted to see the host jump behind his boss in fear. He glared a moment later.
The manager looked like she'd been slapped, and stared at her employee with contempt. Paul looked at her with confusion and annoyance.
Her face made a complete 180 as she faced the customers with a smile. “You're absolutely right. I cannot apologize enough for my employee's idiocy. I promise he will be dealt with severely. But I am hoping it would be possible to avoid getting lawyers involved in this.
Franziska laughed openly like an evil stepmother. Phoenix took the moment to intervene in a icy tone.
“That's a rather impossible ask, ma'am. I'm a well established attorney, my partner is the Chief Prosecutor of Japanifornia, and his step-sister is a renowned international prosecutor. ” He paused for a moment, relishing the color that drained from both of their faces. Edgeworth walked towards them, instinctively planning a way to navigate the minefield of a situation before someone was blown to high heaven.
“If you would like to talk in private, I believe we can come to a peaceful agreement,” Edgeworth spoke clearly despite being out of breath. At this point he was more terrified of what could happen with Franziska and Phoenix on the same side than the homophobia.
A wave of relief washed over the woman's face, happy to see the look of concern which was mirrored in the prosecutor's eyes. Franziska glared daggers at him, but he ignored them.
“Thank you. Is it alright if I take a moment to find a suitable host to take over Paul's duties?” The employee looked at her with concern.
“Absolutely. I expect he will be joining us for this discussion since I far from finished with that pathetic waste of oxygen,” Franziska was determined to take control of the conversation again.
Paul gulped, and looked at his manager for some sort of protection which she didn't provide. He looked like an angry man headed to the gallows. His boss walked away without another glance in his direction,
“If you whip me, I will sue.” He half shouted, somehow drawing even more attention from the onlookers.
“I encourage you to try.” Franziska said coldly, and the look of a sneer in her eyes.
She cracked her whip directly behind him, and the man retreated into the kitchen at top speed.
“Aw, man,” Phoenix said just loud enough for Franziska and Edgeworth to hear.
“Worry not. If he tries to avoid our discussion, I will make sure to have one with him afterwards, Violently. After all, my engagement ring is sharp enough to cut any man,” she said with pride, showing the aquamarine and opal studded gold band to her brother. The light blue gem in the middle was indeed sharpened.
“That's my girl,” Maya said, kissing her cheek.
And for the first time in a very long time, Edgeworth had no desire to run and bury himself back into the closet. He didn't feel broken or wrong or ashamed of who he was anymore. Gently, he clasped Phoenix's hand, and was met with a rewarding smile.
“Does this mean I can buy you that rainbow cravat?” Phoenix teased and squeezed his hand.
“Absolutely not, that mess is beyond tacky.” Edgeworth responded with a slight look of horror before he realized Phoenix was joking.
“Aw, why not? That sounds so cool and not tacky!” Maya pouted.
“You could use some color in your wardrobe other than maroon and white,” Franziska joked.
“Forgive me if I don't take fashion advice from a lesbian, dear sister.”
And as the quartet laughed, some tension finally dissipated. After a short talk with the manager, who was full of apologies and if anything seemed pleased to finally have an excuse to fire Paul, they were treated to a complimentary meal and two bottles of wine in celebration. Franziska also managed to get a good scream out of the homophobe with a couple cracks of her whip and despite threats that they would hear from his attorney, he never bothered them again.
Maya, however, had no problem bothering him a couple months later when she noticed him shouting in protest with some religious hate group on a strip of grass outside of the fine arts building at Pearl's college. Unfortunately from those losers, Maya was on a first name basis with the Bagpipe club.
