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“I’m cornered! I need help,” Lance screamed through the coms. “Where is everyone? We need Voltron!”
“We’re trying but they’re everywhere!” Pidge yelled back.
Allura called out desperately, “We’re pinned under heavy fire, hold on Lance!”
“The main ship is coming... They can’t damage the Black Lion too much, so they’re taking it. Shit! They’re almost here! Don’t let them get-“
“... Lance? Lance?!” Hunk’s panicked voice came, with nothing but static in response.
Shiro collapsed on the Castleship, a sick feeling in his stomach as he watched the Black Lion disappear.
-
Lance looked like a broken dove, his bruised and bloodied body covered by the stark white suit of the healing pod. Shiro hovered over him, allowing the others to peel him away from Lance’s side for short moments at a time for food and sleep, before returning to his spot. His eyes grew darker with every day that passed. He heard the others mutter about the set back in his recovery this caused, how he was falling back to square one. They didn’t seem to understand just how much this was Shiro’s fault. He could worry about his own health after Lance regained his.
The first few steps after a whole week in the pod, Lance could barely hold himself up. Coran supported one side, Shiro the other- he would have bitten off the hand of anyone else who tried. Lance gave him a slightly dazed smile and fell promptly asleep, head lolling towards Shiro’s.
“Let me take him,” Shiro murmured to Coran, gently scooping up Lance’s legs and holding him closely. At least he looked peaceful sleeping curled up against Shiro’s chest, no signs of the awful brutality, save for very few faded scars. The others watched him carry Lance away and had the heart to give them space.
-
When he woke, it was to Shiro’s face for the second time. It seemed whenever he opened his eyes he was greeted by the same worried eyes, the same warm smile. Seeing him outside the pod when he was first released wasn’t completely unexpected, but seeing him sat beside Lance’s bed this time around struck him by surprise.
“I haven’t been sleeping too long, I hope,” Lance said hoarsely.
Shiro handed him a glass of water, careful to place it securely in his hands before letting go.
“No, not too long.”
Lance hummed and sipped his water gratefully. He stretched his legs out from where he was sat and yawned. Shiro raised a brow.
“You still tired?” he asked.
Lance smiled, “Yeah, a little actually.”
“Ah, sorry I’ll go. I just... I stayed here just to check you were really okay, I guess.”
“That’s okay. I mean, I don’t mind you staying. Nothing I haven’t done with you.”
Shiro let out a slow breath. “Lance- I wanted to say how sorry I am. I know you don’t like when I point it out, but you are in this position because of me. And you were in so much danger. You could have died out there. While I was sat here doing nothing, knowing it was my fault, knowing...”
“Stop it.”
They looked at each other for a moment, the weighted silence pressing in.
“I chose this myself. I wanted this. Not only for you, but for me too,” Lance said quietly, “I wanted a chance to prove myself as someone capable, as someone of value to this team. Maybe this last mission didn’t go well but leading this team I believe I’ve done good, and it’s meant so much to see you getting better. Having you mentor me is beyond what I always wanted, but what’s more important is being able to be there for you as a friend.”
Lance leaned over to touch Shiro’s arm, but he shifted ever so slightly out of reach, his gaze falling to the ground. Lance swallowed thickly as he retracted his hand. He’d never wanted to be one of the reasons for Shiro’s guilt; he’d never wanted to add to his pain. But here they were.
“I don’t need your comfort,” Shiro said, the emotional crack in his own voice betraying him.
Lance tried to reach out again and something twisted in Shiro’s stomach. He stood as a lump formed thick in his throat and he unwillingly backed himself out the room.
“Get some rest,” he said dejectedly, before leaving.
-
The next time they both saw each other was at dinner that night, it was the first time the whole team had eaten together again after a long time. Shiro sat noticeably far from Lance, though no one commented.
“Never thought I’d say this, but I’ve missed Coran’s cooking,” Lance laughed.
“Don’t worry, I made desert,” Hunk reassured him, smiling.
As everyone ate and chatted, Hunk leaned over to talk to Lance quietly.
“Have you spoken to Shiro?”
Lance’s eyebrows pinched together, looking pained as he pushed around his food. He took a moment before answering.
“Yeah... He holds so much guilt over it, and I keep telling him its okay, but he won’t listen. I’m trying, but I don’t know how to help this time.”
“Maybe he just wants to feel that he’s helping you. If you’re trying to be the comforter after what you’ve just been through, it’s probably not what either of you need right now. I think he just wants to take care of you, and you need to be taken care of. Let him,” Hunk suggested, before patting Lance’s hand and going back to his food.
-
Another week went by. Lance masked himself with his old ways, his usual snark, his over the top confidence. He and Shiro hadn’t spoken much. Everything was going back to how it was with Lance returning to the Black Lion, but something in the air didn’t feel right. A particularly restless night Shiro decided to go for a walk round the ship and give him time to think. He passed by one of the ship’s observatory rooms and found Lance stood alone, staring out into space. He noticed how small his frame appeared consumed by the vastness of what was beyond them. Something small twinged in the flesh of Shiro’s right arm. He couldn’t bring himself to look outside. He moved slowly until he was beside Lance and noticed his watery eyes.
“I thought things were going okay?” Shiro asked, taking the first step.
“They are.”
“But you’re still thinking about it,” he said knowingly, the faint humming of the ship the only sound heard from the distance.
Lance wrapped his arms around himself and closed in. “I don’t want to be.”
Shiro waited.
“Why am I so scared?” Lance whispered, trembling.
Shiro took a breath and finally looked out the window. The planets and stars stretched out before him.
“Maybe in time, you won’t be,” he said. He found Lance’s hand and took it in his.
Lance turned and brought their linked hands towards him, stroking the metal of Shiro’s fingers. There was a sense of understanding in the smile he gave him.
“Maybe in time, you won’t be either.”
Lance squeezed his hand once before going to leave, but Shiro chased his warmth, not letting their hands break apart. Lance looked back as Shiro searched for the words.
“I thought that it was arrogant of me- to like that you looked up to me, to like that you cared what I thought. I wanted you to keep believing I was a hero, but I realized it was less to do with someone thinking good things about me, and more to do with it being you that thought it. You have heart, and strength, and kindness. You let me be weak around you and didn’t act like it made me pitiful. I felt that I could let go for once. All those weeks of you listening and caring and helping me rebuild. Lance, I just wanted to do the same. I’ve always wanted to do the same. You went through something I know about, let me help you. You don’t have to keep pretending, you know.”
There was a moment where they stood in silence, looking at each other properly. No holding back. Then Lance’s face crumpled. His shoulders dropped, like Shiro managing to say the only thing that could pierce his resolve. He cried for the first time since he’d returned. Carefully pulling Lance against him, Shiro buried his face in his hair and wrapped his arms round him tightly.
“Hunk’s gonna say I told you so,” Lance murmured.
“Hm?”
“Doesn’t matter,” he said, sinking into Shiro’s hold. He stayed there for a while, enjoying the feeling of safety. Of security. Shiro always made him feel that way. “I like you,” Lance admitted at last. "I always have." He let out a breath of relief. There was no way of hiding it anymore, no reason to keep it a secret, he could finally be honest.
He felt Shiro still for a moment, then smile against his hair. “I know. I like you too, Lance.”
Lance pulled away from his chest and Shiro wiped the tears off his face. Hands found themselves round the small of Shiro’s back, and Lance leaned up as Shiro came to meet his lips. A gentle first kiss. Lance kept his eyes closed and smiled.
“I’ve been waiting years for that,” he sighed.
Shiro kissed him again.
“Thank you for waiting.”