Archive of Our Own ^beta

Captain America: A Perverted Mind?
November 12^th, 1965
_{William Hag}

Earlier this week, Captain America’s, Steve Rogers’, sketchbooks were found when Rogers’ former apartment was finally sold off. Some had been hidden (for good reason), while others had been left on the floor when Rogers left more than twenty years ago.

Most include drawings of a 1930’s Brooklyn which is completely fine. Rogers is a decent artist in that regard.

What is not fine is that Captain America may very well be against everything American. Against the nuclear family. Against our rules as a society. Against what is right, what is holy.

What you will find in these sketchbooks are drawings of Rogers’ best friend, James ‘Bucky’ Barnes. His face is drawn on almost every page. There are drawings of muscular arms, legs and chest. Who knows if Rogers was imagining this or if he drew while Barnes wasn’t looking. Unless Barnes gave permission, which is likely due to a sketchbook filled with nude drawings. Fantasies maybe, but it couldn’t have been Rogers imagination alone.

It is simply perverted what is shown there. And to think, we had this man projecting our country, our ideals, while he was a pervert and God knows what else. We can never know what the homosexual is like. How they really behave. We do know they will come for your children, corrupt your sons. Thank goodness Rogers went down in that plane.

If Barnes was also as perverted as Rogers, then thank the Lord he is dead too.

--

Howard Stark Ridiculed
November 15^th, 1965
_{William Hag}

Howard Stark tried his best to defend Captain America when the sketchbooks were found and released, only to realise it was a mistake to do so. In his haste to try and assure us that Captain America would not reject the ideals of America, he mistakenly mentioned that the gracious Captain had went against orders in the war. For what this was for, we don’t know.

What we do know is, Captain America is a dammed disgrace and if Colonel Phillips had done his job properly, he would have seen Captain Rogers for what he was, a perverted man. How he did not get a blue discharge with all the nude drawings he had in his sketchbooks is a darn surprise.

What else could Stark be hiding? Could he have known the truth we seek?

--

Peggy Carter Speaks Out
November 24^th, 1965
_{William Hag}

Margaret ‘Peggy’ Carter has spoken out today in an official statement to defend Captain America, Steve Rogers. In it, she detailed that the drawings in his sketchbook were nothing more than a study in human form, done during his art classes. She reassured us that Rogers told her time and time again about his art and that there was nothing perverted about it.

She also stated clearly that Rogers was absolutely not a homosexual. He had been in a relationship with Peggy and other women during his time in the USO and when he was at base during the war. So, it is fairly clear now that Captain America was in fact the man we thought he was.

We shouldn’t disrespect the dead by trying to smear their name, at least, when they have done nothing than pursue their passion while also not being a threat to every ideal America holds dear.

--

Howard Stark Comes Out as Bisexual
19^th March, 1986
_{New York Gays}

Is it much of a surprise? This man has been known for his extreme support of the gay community in the last few years. He even defended Captain America’s image in ’65 when his sketchbooks had been released.

This is a man who has tirelessly tried to get people to see that things can be progressive. If it wasn’t for the war, maybe we would have flying cars by now.

During the last few years Stark has been pouring money into AIDS research, receiving plenty of criticism in doing so. Yet, after all that, he’s being attacked for coming out as his true self. That is the issue we face right now.

People are feeling more confident to come out and defend themselves, if the situation requires it. With the gay community only getting bigger, it makes sense. But there are still people out there who are vulnerable, who need to stay in the closet. And if you come out while being a celebrity, it doesn’t get any better.

We, as a community, need to provide support for everyone. We need to protect those around us. Most of all, we need to show those who are against us that no matter what you try to do, we will always fight back.

--

Anthony Stark Berates Father for Coming Out
20^th May, 1986
_{New York Gays}

When reporters caught Anthony at a press conference of his father’s, Howard Stark, they didn’t hesitate to ask him what he thinks about his father coming out to the world. While Anthony said he has known for years, he hates the fact his father came out.

‘It makes it hard, you know? For him. I think, after everything, he wishes he could have expressed himself more before now. Maybe when he was young. But coming out… It just leaves an opening for people to attack him. He shouldn’t have done it.’

I think it makes it very clear the issues we still have to face in the world. Howard Stark, the genius of the 20^th century, who has done so much for the progression of technology, is being attacked for who he is. Even though he’s a millionaire, he still has to face that.

We all wish it was better for our community, but I think Anthony Stark said something of note there. Howard Stark wishes he could have expressed himself, in the past. We all wish that. Amongst the laws against us, amongst the hate and the attacks, both verbal and physical, we crave for a world we can be safe in.

Hopefully we’ll get there.

--

Howard Stark Creates Charity for Gay and Trans Youth
August 29^th, 1988
_{New York Gays}

Howard Stark is starting to be known less as a millionaire businessman and more as a generally good person. Sure, he has set up foundations before but that usually kept his name out of it. This new charity to help gay and trans kids who are homeless is something he has put a firm stamp on.

With the help of his wife, Maria Stark, the two have set up a fairly good system. They bought an old boarding school that was set to be demolished and turned it into homeless shelter. And if the children want, they are free to go to school there, as Stark personally picked out teachers who are either gay or trans.

And he hasn’t gone big with it either. He hasn’t set up a press conference and told us what he is going to do, he merely did it. I honestly think these children will be in good hands. With so many young people being kicked out of their homes, this is a welcome addition to the resources we already have.

We caught up with Howard Stark in an exclusive interview to tell us all about this new charity and what it includes.

--

The attached excerpt is from the documentary Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes: Inseparable, initially aired on 15/05/1989.

[camera fades in with a picture of Steve and Bucky, crossfading to a picture of when they were children]

NARRATOR
Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes were inseparable from the moment they met, until James ‘Bucky’ Barnes met his untimely death. The two were close friends, even in the war. And now, all the surviving Howling Commandos are finally able to speak about their lost comrades in this special documentary.

[camera cuts to Timothy Dugan; Sergeant, Howling Commando, seventy-seven]

DUGAN
[scratches his beard] Steve was… Well, Steve. And Bucky…

[camera cuts to Gabe Jones; Private, Howling Commando, seventy]

JONES
[laughs] Barnes was something… Something special. He, uh, left an impact on us all. So did Cap, but Bucky always kept us together. When we were captured… Well, it was good to have him, you know?

[clip of Steve and Bucky strategizing. The Commandos nod along as Steve points to the map while Bucky is explaining some, likely, key points]

[camera cuts to James Morita sitting on a porch, watching over a field; Private, Howling Commando, sixty-nine]

MORITA
We knew things about them you’ll never know. All us Commandos knew each other well, but… Cap and Sarge knew each other before. And that mattered… in the war. Having someone who knew who you were inside mattered.

[camera cuts to James Falsworth in a pub; Brigadier, Howling Commando, seventy-five]

FALSWORTH
What was their friendship like? [smiles] They were close. As two mates would be. Best of friends. We never would have been rescued if… [shakes head] I think that’s still classified, sorry. But… Steve and Bucky? They were the best of people. Kind, funny, a pain in the arse. They were… unique.

[clips of Steve and Bucky working; strategizing and enjoying what little free time they had]

MORITA
What happened? On– on the train? I… [Morita wipes tears from his eyes] Bucky… It was HYDRA, what else?

[camera cuts to Jacques Dernier; Howling Commando, speaking in 1987]

DERNIER
From the moment the plan was brought up… I knew it was bad. The train was going too fast. It’s clear to me now that it was a trap. Arnim Zola was on that train for a reason, knowing we would come. He wanted Sarge back, to continue his sick experiments on him. [Dernier’s hands shake as he sinks into his chair]

[clip of a train was shown, similar to the original train from 1945]

DERNIER
The train was out of our sight in seconds. The way that sound travels in the Alps… we knew someone fell when we heard the screams… And when we all got onto the train, miles away… Cap was never the same again. He blamed himself, but… there was nothing any of us could have done about it.

[camera cuts back to Falsworth, he is shaking to his core]

FALSWORTH
It was traumatic is what it bloody was. The screams, my god his screams. I can’t believe to this day how far we were from… Well… Bucky didn’t deserve what happened to him. He… [smiles] he used to talk about going home and living in the same street as Steve. He was setting up all these plans and Steve was in every one of them. In Bucky’s mind, Steve would marry Peggy and Bucky would marry some lass he’d meet. They’d have kids and help each other out and always… be there… Christ, they were so young… like all the boys who died.

[camera cuts back to Dugan, he has a tear in his eye; he brushes them away and concentrates on breathing for a minute before looking to the camera]

DUGAN: Steve only dove his plane into the sea because he believed his job was done… As Captain America, he was only good for fighting, he knew the government would use him. So, in the nicest way, he died knowing he was free. He died knowing he would see his… best friend again.

[camera cuts to Jones, his face twists; he shakes his head, looking to the interviewer with a glare before sighing]

JONES
Yeah… I believe so. When Bucky fell… When we lost him, we couldn’t get Steve out of his own head.

[camera cuts to Dernier, speaking in 1987]

DERNIER
He was reckless in his last days. He changed. Rogers was… unrecognisable once he lost Barnes.

[camera cuts back to Morita, who sniffles]

MORITA
I wouldn’t say it was suicide. But I was on the other end of that radio… for a while. He was adamant nothing could be done but… there had been time. Cap was grieving when he… We were all grieving.

[camera cuts to Jones]

JONES
We lost Steve before he died. He believed it was all his fault, Bucky’s death. So, yeah, I think he did give up while he still had the chance to, without people thinking wrongly of him.

[music overlays the audio as the camera cuts to Dugan]

DUGAN
They were both so… dependent on each other. If there’s anything you can take away from this, it’s that… Steve and Bucky came as a pair. Without one having the other, things fell apart quick.

[music plays in the background as several edited together clips of Steve and Bucky are shown]

NARRATOR
There aren’t too many recordings of Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes as themselves. It’s often Captain America leading troops, not Steve Rogers in his down time. The two are legends. And are the only Howling Commandos to lose their lives. As James Morita said, we’ll never know it all, we’ll never know what the Commandos know, but we do have one video that explains their friendship entirely.

[clip shows of Steve smiling and Bucky saying ‘we are friends’ as he laughs]

-­-

The attached excerpt is from the programme Steven Rogers: The Mystery Man, initially aired on 09/06/1991.

[camera fades in to Howard Stark looking over blueprints; Engineer, seventy-three]

BAKER
You knew Steve Rogers well, did you not?

[camera slowly crossfades to Stark sitting in an armchair, in a white room]

STARK
I’d say we were like friends

BAKER
Would you say you knew things about him most don’t?

STARK
I would, but I wouldn’t necessarily reveal those things without his permission, right? [nervously laughs]

[camera cuts to shots of New York, Baker’s voice overlays them]

BAKER
We’ve heard throughout this programme that Rogers was a private man. He kept things close to his chest, never telling anyone too much. He was someone who tried his best to defend anyone in an unfair fight, when he was at home, in Brooklyn. Perhaps because his own skinny body couldn’t keep up with these fights, his right-hand man, Bucky Barnes, always stayed by his side. That relationship holds the key to who Rogers was.

[camera cuts to Margaret Carter, seventy, sitting in a cosy room with brown walls and low lighting]

CARTER
Steve and Bucky? It’s certainly a topic people like to bring up, especially in the last few years

BAKER
I believe it has something to do with the gay right’s movement

CARTER
[nods] Perhaps.

BAKER
You were in a relationship with Rogers, you must have known Barnes well.

CARTER
I was never in a relationship with Steve… We kissed once and that was it. I said what I said in 1965 to deter people from smearing my friend’s name.

BAKER
Was he gay?

CARTER
Penelope, as much as I did know Steve, I didn’t know everything about him. So, I don’t know.

BAKER
You have no idea?

CARTER
None.

[camera cuts to Stark]

BAKER
You’re gay–

STARK
I’m bisexual but go ahead.

BAKER
Did you ever get a sense that Steve, and maybe Bucky, were gay… or bisexual?

STARK
I… no. No, I didn’t. They were close but… not like that.

BAKER
Mr. Stark, I’m sorry to say but, you’re lying.

STARK
[shakes head] Steve and Bucky were a pair… And… I got a feeling, but it was only ever a feeling. I never saw anything that made me think they were gay or otherwise. Now, please, leave this topic be. Steve and Bucky do not deserve having the press smear there names again. Respect the dead.

[camera cuts to Timothy Dugan, seventy-nine, lying back on a rocking chair]

DUGAN
Trust me when I say, Steve without Bucky was nothing but a mess trying to keep himself together. And Bucky without Steve? He was nothing but air.

BAKER
That’s an extreme comment to make.

DUGAN
They were extreme.

--

Foundation Howard Stark Set Up for LGBT Youth Collapses
June 17^th, 1992
_{New York Gays}

It’s been just over six months since Howard and Maria Stark lost their lives in an awful car accident. Due to this horrifying event, Tony Stark inherited his father’s company and all his assets. Unfortunately, the twenty-two-year-old has been unable to keep up with some of the responsibilities he holds now.

Without the careful management and support, the charity which supports homeless LGBT youth by housing them and giving them education has quickly fell into disrepair. This leaves many of the vulnerable young people homeless once again.

We reached out to Mr. Stark for a statement, which he personally replied with: ‘I’m sorry this happened but… I can’t control everything right now. I’m still grieving’. He also mentioned that he tried to pass the charity onto other people, but no one would take offer. All Mr. Stark said towards that was: ‘Homophobes are still rife in this world. I’m sorry this happened’.

Right now, we can only hope these young people can find safe places to sleep at night.

--

The attached excerpt is from the programme Morning Chats with Lisa, initially aired on 09/06/1995.

[camera pans around a couch where Lorraine Helen and Vera Fry are sitting; Lisa sits on an armchair opposite them]

LISA
So, in recent news, Peggy Carter has come out as bisexual. What do you think about that?

LORRAINE
Frankly, it makes me believe that what we say is true. Homosexuals do group together.

VERA
Does this mean that the press has always been right? Steve Rogers was a disgusting homosexual?

LISA
[laughs] Yeah, those sketchbooks are real incriminating now. All those nude pictures he drew of his best friend, bet James Barnes was a freak too.

VERA
Oh absolutely. No doubt about that. They were close, weren’t they? For the ‘30s. Of course there was something going on there. I feel sorry for Barnes’ younger siblings, to have someone so perverted in their family. I bet they feared for their innocence.

LORRAINE
Shame, they were attractive. Besides, it would make sense. Rogers, Barnes, Carter and Stark were all close. I wouldn’t be surprised if they all knew. Only Carter would be able to tell us.

LISA
She would lie, like she always has. Anyway, I’m glad we know the truth. Some inspirational woman she is.

--

The attached excerpt is from the book Beware of The Homosexual, first published in 18/04/2003.

Which brings me onto the next relevant topic. Captain America, aka, Steve Rogers.

The man’s sexuality has been hotly debated since the ‘60s, but I think with all the evidence, it is likely that Rogers was homosexual. He was in the army in WWII, I think he would have had amble opportunity to explore his sexuality in ways I don’t want to think about.

Over the years Rogers’ secret sketchbooks with highly detailed naked pictures of James ‘Bucky’ Barnes inside have been analysed and looked over and proved to have been Steve’s. Art experts tell us the drawings are a real-life type drawing, as such, Barnes would have had to pose for Rogers. And it gets worse than that, for some handwriting previously thought to be Rogers’ has been proved to be Barnes’.

The most interesting quote is beside one drawing of Barnes on a bed, from a bird’s eye view perspective. He is naked, and his hands are pinned above his head by another set of hands. It reads: ‘This is my favourite. I love it. Every time’.

Before, many thought this was Rogers referencing his imagination but, now, it is clear that Barnes is actually talking about when they did this during sex.

It makes me want to puke from the mere thought.

--

There was a loud slam as a laptop lid was violently closed. There was a small noise of frustration, anger. A phone scrapped across a table as it was picked up. With quick movements, a man, unlocked his phone and brought up twitter. He sighed and stared down at his laptop. It wasn’t right, all he had just read and watched and other things he had found.

He quickly moved away from twitter and instead typed into Google, ‘best ways to get back at homophobes’. A large range of responses came up, but the man knew what to do from there. Had known what to do since he read the first goddamn article. He definitely had a hate for whoever William Hag had been. And he had large admirations for the magazine, New York Gays, which no longer existed. It had been happily archived, however. Which the man was glad for.

The interviews and documentaries were even more insane, considering he hadn’t even known the documentary featuring the Howling Commandos existed. Never mind everything he had found out about Howard Stark.

He smiled as he began to realise what he had to do. So, naturally, he tapped back onto twitter and began the process of what he was going to say. What he was going to tell his fifty million followers. Hell, really, he was wondering how he could frame this in the perfect way, to get people to back him.

And, truly, he knew he didn’t have to worry too much about the homophobes, it was 2014, people knew better. Things were certainly a hundred times better in those days, compared to the awful past. Compared to what it had been like over the last decades. Compared to the blatant homophobia that was just plain normal in the past.

The man began typing out his message, smiling happily.

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 10m
I decided to make a bad decision and read up on articles and documentaries
about me after my ‘death’. 1/?

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 8m
Turns out (and I didn’t know about this) that my hidden sketchbooks were found.
I can confirm, when I drew Bucky, I had his permission 2/?

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 7m
If anyone still cares about that.
The nude ones were always my favourite.
Bucky was the perfect man 3/?

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 5m
What people of the past did. What they tried to say about me,
and Howard and Peggy… How they attacked them, is
disgraceful 4/?

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 3m
It only makes me glad for sleeping for seventy years.
Now, no one can stop me from being who I am.
Not the law, not the dammed press, not anyone.

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 1m
I’m bisexual. Best get used to it!
And to all the homophobes who attacked my friends for who they were/are,
I hope you rot. :) #CapIsBi

It wasn’t even five minutes since Steve had sent the tweet about him being bisexual when his phone started ringing. It was Pepper. For some reason. Probably because Pepper controlled the PR for the Avengers and no matter how much Steve was a SHIELD agent now, he was still an Avenger first. It was at that moment that Steve kinda realised that SHIELD was gonna end up calling him too. Maybe this was a mistake.

“Steve!” Pepper shouted once he had picked up. He winced at the noise. “Could you have at least consulted someone before telling the world you’re bi?!”

“Hello to you too.” He sighed when Pepper made a strange angry noise that sounded near unnatural. Like she was at an end of a tether for some reason. “It was… I felt I had to do it right now, after I made myself angry first.”

“We’re getting calls every minute from journalists asking for an interview, we could have prepared for this.”

“Look, I know what I’m getting myself into here. I’m from a time where it was illegal to be me, I know, okay?” He smiled slightly. “I thought that maybe I could be myself, you know? Now that I finally can be. It might be a shock to all of you, that I did it this way but… now feels right.”

“Okay… Sorry for getting angry, Steve.”

“It’s okay. I can handle the homophobes, you know?”

“I know. But, can you at least do one interview, please?”

“Sure.”

Pepper went quiet for a moment. “How about the 10^th of January? It gives you a week to prepare.”

Steve nodded to himself. “As long as SHIELD don’t need me. Yeah, it sounds good.”

“Okay, I’ll tell you more towards the time. Bye!”

The phone hung up and Steve was left with a twitter full of notifications. He decided that, since it had been a while, he’d look back at twitter but rather than look at the replies, in case of anything bad, he looked into the tag instead. To which he found that all his friends had been quick to tweet out a reaction to his news, and that all their tweets were already on top. All were good too, which was a welcome relief.

You Already Know Who It Is @TheRealDealTony · 4m
Proud of my frozen friend, Steve, who came out just when everyone
was beginning to think he was straight as hell. #CapIsBi

You Already Know Who It Is @TheRealDealTony · 3m
@PoisonedWidow, you’re gonna have to double Steve’s blind date pool.
We’ll get him a partner someday!

Widows Bite :) @PoisonedWidow · 2m  
@TheRealDealTony I don’t think Steve will ever accept the dates :( But!
@RealSteve_Rogers, glad you finally feel safe to tell us
all who you are <3 #CapIsBi

Eye of the HAWK @ImABirdBinch · 4m
WHOOO! YOU GO, STEVE! Let’s go make sure some homophobes
rot in hell! So excited for you man. Everyone supports you!
#CapIsBi

Bruce Banner @Bruce_Banner_Hulk · 3m
So happy for you coming out, Steve. Only wish hatred
of the past wasn’t the reason that spurred you to do it.
Happy for you #CapIsBi

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 1m
@TheRealDealTony @PoisonedWidow @ImABirdBinch @Bruce_Banner_Hulk
Thanks guys! That all means a lot! It’s good to know people support me.

The Only Capsicle That Matters @RealSteve_Rogers · 1m
And Tony, Natasha, you’ll never be able to get me a date. :*

Steve was gonna end up telling Tony and Natasha that he’d rather it just be a joke between them, and nothing serious. At the same time, if it really was going to be a joke, he’d rather they wouldn’t bring men into it. He knew why he didn’t want to date, and it wasn’t because he was too busy or because the woman Tony and Natasha normally suggested were bad, it was because Steve was still grieving.

He missed Bucky like he’d miss anything that was a part of him. To move on and be with someone else? It was too much. He wanted to cling on to everything he and Bucky had for just a little longer. Almost three years wasn’t enough time to move on yet, not for Steve anyway.

--

Of course, the universe was just as cruel as it had always been. Because Nick Fury had been shot and now there was a new threat, the goddamn Winter Soldier, whoever he was. And now Steve and Natasha were on the run from HYDRA. It was a lot to happen in a few days, but, before they knew it, they were on a bridge fighting what was essentially a ghost story.

Until the ghost story was suddenly very real. Until Steve had been thrown off the bridge. Until he came running at the soldier just in time to protect Natasha. Until the soldier’s mask came flying off.

And Steve knew he would be able to see his face.

Just… how was it that face?

How was it Bucky’s?

Well, Steve didn’t have much time to ponder when the soldier disappeared after Natasha fired at him. He only briefly reminisced once he’d found out Fury had never died. And he couldn’t think much as Bucky, yeah, it really was him, was shooting and punching him and… then didn’t finish his mission.

And was the only one who could have dragged Steve out of the river.

And, and, suddenly, two years had slipped by in Steve’s frantic search for Bucky. The gossip mags never really reported too widely on Steve coming out, it was forgotten once all the SHIELD stuff went down. So, Steve was fine on the homophobia front. No one ever seemed to care really anyway. Which was a good thing, considering Steve had so much on his plate. Especially when all the Ultron stuff went down. And then, suddenly, Lagos.

Everything was frantic until there was a moment, where Steve was in the place Bucky was living.

Bucky was there and for a second, for a second it left a vulnerable hole in their lives. Then, swiftly, it all went downhill from there.

It was a terrible set of circumstances, but everyone involved eventually got over it. Eventually.

--

Buckaroo @BuckyBarnesIrl · 5m
@RealSteve_Rogers Happy anniversary, doll!
Wish I could be there :(

Stevie Is His Namie @RealSteve_Rogers · 4m
@BuckyBarnesIrl You are here. You’re in the bedroom right now.

Buckaroo @BuckyBarnesIrl · 4m
@RealSteve_Rogers :o How did you know?

Stevie Is His Namie @RealSteve_Rogers · 3m
@BuckyBarnesIrl You’re not the only spy in this household, hun

Buckaroo @BuckyBarnesIrl · 2m
@RealSteve_Rogers I knew I should have closed
the window. But it was loud <.<

Stevie Is His Namie @RealSteve_Rogers · 2m
@BuckyBarnesIrl Come out of the bedroom, Buck. I’m watching
this amazing documentary about fish.

Buckaroo @BuckyBarnesIrl · 1m
@RealSteve_Rogers Oh, wow, how interesting
for our fifth anniversary.

Stevie Is His Namie @RealSteve_Rogers · 1m
@BuckyBarnesIrl Come out of the bedroom!!

Bucky opened the door to find Steve sitting on the couch, with no TV on. He smiled as Bucky realised the coffee table had been redecorated with a red table cloth that spread across the floor. On top of that were plates and sliver service type stuff. Steve nodded to the kitchen, where something was cooking in the oven.

“Happy anniversary, dear,” Steve said, beaming.

“Happy anniversary...”

Bucky, still in awe, moved towards the sofa and collapsed onto it. Immediately, Steve moved so that he could drape his arm over Bucky. Leaning into the touch, Bucky was glad to cuddle with Steve. It had been a few weeks since they’d seen each other, between stuff happening with SHIELD, that they got involved with just to make sure HYDRA could never grow again. They had reasons.

Their phones pinged just as the oven began beeping. Steve jumped up to rescue the food for inevitable burning, while Bucky picked up his phone to see what horrible thing had his and Steve’s phones chiming at the same time.

I Am Who I Am @TheRealDealTony · 1m
Ohmygoddd, make @BuckyBarnesIrl and @RealSteve_Rogers stop!!

Spidey! @SpidermanHasNoName · 30s
@TheRealDealTony We can’t! They’re unstoppable!

“Oh no…” Bucky murmured.

“Who was it?” Steve asked, picking up to plates and taking them to the kitchen.

“Twitter. Tony and Parker.”

“Was it their normal tweets?”

“Nah. Parker said we’re unstoppable this time and Tony didn’t say we were cute.”

Steve appeared with the two plates of fish. It was some fancy dish Bucky was sure he was going to love. Steve’s 21^st century cooking was pretty damn good. Not that it wasn’t in the past, it was just way better than ever. When Bucky stopped being amazed by the restaurant level presentation, he carefully tried it, finding that it was the best fish dish he’d ever had. He never really liked fish, but Steve always did something that made it different. Maybe it was the spices.

Their phones pinged several times while they ate but they ignored it until they were finished. When they did finish, they found their twitters had blown up because of their friends. Some playful banter they could get themselves involved in.

Widows Eat Males :) @PoisonedWidow · 15m
Ohhh, @TheRealDealTony, you know Steve and Bucky
are actually insanely cute and you don’t want them to stop.
We wanted Steve to be in a relationship, didn’t we? :)  

I Am Who I Am @TheRealDealTony · 15m
@PoisonedWidow but it’s 2024 now. I’d rather live than die because
Steve and Bucky decided to be cute. You know I can’t deal.

Widows Eat Males :) @PoisonedWidow · 14m
@TheRealDealTony Then learn, because they
are going to be like this until we all die.

FLY LIKE A HAWK @ImABirdBinch · 12m
@TheRealDealTony, @PoisonedWidow is right!! You
have to learn. How do you think the rest of us survive!
Also @BuckyBarnesIrl I don’t know why you
forget @RealSteve_Rogers was a spy for a few years!
SHIELD doesn’t hire wimps!

Bruce Banner @Bruce_Banner_Hulk · 11m
Oh no. It’s their anniversary again? I’m officially going
back into space with Thor. Don’t think I won’t!

ThUndA ThThunda ThUnDer @GodOfThunder_Thor · 10m
I’m on Earth right now @Bruce_Banner_Hulk!! I’ll save you, dear!

Bruce Banner @Bruce_Banner_Hulk · 10m
@GodOfThunder_Thor Please, Thor. I can’t take this
any longer!! (Love you).

ThUndA ThThunda ThUnDer @GodOfThunder_Thor · 9m
(Love you too <3)

I Am Who I Am @TheRealDealTony · 7m
@BuckyBarnesIrl and @RealSteve_Rogers are just as bad as
@Bruce_Banner_Hulk and @GodOfThunder_Thor. Please, someone
come save me. I don’t deserve this!

Spidey! @SpidermanHasNoName · 7m
@TheRealDealTony I’ll save you Mr. Stark!!

I Am Who I Am @TheRealDealTony · 7m
Thanks, kid :) @SpidermanHasNoName

FALCONNNNNNNN!! @IBeSamWilson · 5m
Oh god. What have I just stumbled upon.
@BuckyBarnesIrl and @RealSteve_Rogers be warned, stop being
cute, or you’ll chase everyone off the planet!
By the way, guys, let them be, it’s their anniversary

YEET A Panther @PrincessShuri · 4m
You know what? I think @BuckyBarnesIrl and @RealSteve_Rogers
are pretty darn impressive and you should all leave them be.

Buckaroo @BuckyBarnesIrl · 2m
@TheRealDealTony @SpidermanHasNoName @PoisonedWidow
@ImABirdBinch @Bruce_Banner_Hulk @GodOfThunder_Thor
@IBeSamWilson @PrincessShuri
We *are* pretty cute, guys. You’d miss our cuteness!
[attached image]

FALCONNNNNNNN!! @IBeSamWilson · 1m
Well… now they’re kissing! TIME TO GO OFF PLANET GUYS.
AVENGERS ASEMBLE OR WHATEVER!!!!! LET’S GET THE FUCK OUT
@TheRealDealTony @SpidermanHasNoName @PoisonedWidow
@ImABirdBinch @Bruce_Banner_Hulk @GodOfThunder_Thor
@PrincessShuri

Stevie Is His Namie @RealSteve_Rogers · 40s
Ohh nooo, whatever have we doneeeeee! :O

Buckaroo @BuckyBarnesIrl · 35s
We didn’t do anything @RealSteve_Rogers <3

Stevie Is His Namie @RealSteve_Rogers · 20s
Love you, sweetheart! @BuckyBarnesIrl

Buckaroo @BuckyBarnesIrl · 10s
@RealSteve_Rogers Love you too :)