Chapter Text
The clink of glasses and low harmonics of a pleasant tune could be heard over the thrum and rumble of dozens of people talking, debating and otherwise having a good time.The drinks were flowing, and somewhere someone was carrying around a tray of a sweet smelling something and the gala that had now been going on for nearly two hours. Amidst all of this glitz and glamour stood Jade, alone and nervously twisting her hands around her purse. This was a far cry away from anything in her normal life, though she wasn’t even sure what that meant anymore. Regardless, she’d been feeling starkly out of place for hours now, and that vibe seemed to only be getting stronger. With each minute that passed, she became somehow less sure of herself, of why she was here and what she was going to do. “This was a bad idea.” She thought, trying to work her way through the forest of people without knowing anything or anyone aside. She felt like she was in the way, and that was something she was used to.
Her mind was a aflutter as she passed businessman who owned empires the likes of which she could never imagine. Beside them and all around were leaders and subjects of every nation from places she doubted she would ever visit. Everyone who was anyone was here tonight, which of course made it all the more nerve wracking to be a nobody. It had been opened to the public, yet still she couldn’t shake the feelings. As glamorous and stunning as this all was, none of it was what she had come for. Jade’s reasons, were something she hadn’t really come to terms with. Whenever she tried to formulate them, it made her feel childish and naively optimistic. The very idea of it was absurd and yet she’d come anyway. With every tick of the clock, she was leaning more and more towards running away, bailing now so she wouldn’t make a fool of herself if she hadn’t already. It became a game of bets with herself, the end goal always getting further away as she clung to any reason to and not to stay.
Another half hour and I’ll be gone, she’d said an hours ago. If that tray goes empty, then I’ll leave. Once this song ends, then I’m out. On and on and still she was wandering nervously about having built up no more courage now than she had since she arrived. Her reason for being here seemed as distant as ever.
The party extended to several floors with many rooms, so it was easy enough to get lost, but a part of her wondered if she was maybe keeping herself lost. A braver soul could have been in and out before they severed the entree. Her mind had been filled with these sorts of questions and doubts, for every step she took a thousand voices listed a hundred reasons why she shouldn’t take it. It was such a mess to psyche oneself up and out at the same time. If it went on much longer she was probably going to faint or lose it altogether. She’d been running on high for so long that she was lightheaded.
“What am I doing?” She asked herself. It was a question she’d asked often enough and she had the answer all along. “What did you think was going to happen?” she berated. It all seemed so silly when she laid it out in her head. A youthful instinct that she couldn’t set aside. It had been driving her, but eventually she had to take back control. Jade let out a shaky breath, and nearly shook. She might have to sit down for a long time after this to feel like her legs weren’t going to give way at any moment. “Okay.” she murmured. “One more minute. One more and then I’ll go home. Simple as that. Done and done.” Then when I’m home I’ll realize how weird of an idea this all was. I’ll forget about it and move on. Just try not to imagine the hundred ways this could have gone differently. That last thought made the light headedness come back, because she knew after leaving a different sort of game would play in her head. One where she tortured herself with all these dreams and notions of what would have happened if she’d stayed. The opportunities she’d glanced past that were gone forever. It was a far worse game to play, and she was good at it.
Her eyes fell onto the clock hanging high above, and she saw that her minute was up. A sigh escaped her, one she wanted to be relief. Of course it wasn’t. Her head hung low as she turned, and she resigned herself to walk away. You’re better off a voice told her. It would have been a waste of their time anyway.
That is when she heard it. A bright vibrant laugh that seemed to resonate more clearly than so many others had tonight. She didn’t know why it made her look up, but she did, and just like that, there they were. A tall woman, dressed in a shimmering red with pitch black hair, and at her side a shorter woman, garbed in water tribe fashion whose head was rolling back with laughter. Jade’s heart skipped a beat. After wandering for so long it felt weird to finally be here. Within sight of the avatar and the genius. It didn’t feel real. The golden light, and glistening hanging crystal only made it all feel more surreal.
There they were, talking with another couple by the looks of it. All were wearing smiles and looked utterly stunning. The conversation seemed lively, Korra said something with a wry grin that caused miss Sato to bring a hand to her lips as she laughed, and Jade was too far away to make out what was said. She saw that the pair were holding each others hands, and Jade realized her own hands were wringing her purse to the point of making her knuckles white. There they were. Together. All Jade had to do was step forward, and introduce herself. Say what she wanted to say and that would be that.
Instead, her feet turned her the other way, her heart pounding as again she slid past the party goers, wishing with all her heart she could be invisible. In a few moments, she found herself away from the party, having ducked through a door into a side hall away from the grand ballrooms. Even in this side hall things were still glamorous. The carpet was lush and crimson, thriving plants stood swaying in the circulated air, and a plush ornate looking sofa hugged the wall with cousins along the wall every dozen yards or so.
She fell onto the sofa, head in her hands as she tried to catch her breath. At some point, she wasn’t sure when, she’d started to hyperventilate. Her knees shook and her gasps came out in heavy noisy things. She’d built it up too much in her head. It was obvious, she’d psyched herself out, making herself more and more nervous to the point of near sickness. What had she expected? Jade sat, gasping for air, feeling utterly pathetic and sad, and was very close to tears. This shouldn’t be hard she knew, so why did she always make it that much harder?
She had no concept of time, and more than once a couple or lone party goer came through the same doors, looking for a bathroom or a place to just get away for a moment. None seemed to notice her and she was absolutely fine with that. As time went by, she could breathe again, but her feet felt numb on the carpet, and still she cradled her face in her hands as the tears finally broke through.
The door opened and closed again and again, and she began to tune it out, lost in her own mind.The second her legs would move again, she would be on her way, and she’d do her best to try and forget that she ever did this. Chatter went in one ear and out the other as pairing and couple walked past her without a second glance. She was used to not being seen. She wanted, so badly to be calm, to be someone else, anyone else. Rather than this girl who was so nervous she couldn’t even talk.
The door opened, and another conversation entered her mind.
“...Just for a minute. I can only handle the crowds for so long. I know everyone means well…. Well not everyone but still. I just can’t talk that long without passing out. Another few minutes and you were going to have to carry me.”
“That would have been a sight. Still you’d think we should really be used to these by now but honestly I think they’re getting worse.”
“Oh come on, you’re great out there! They were eating out of the palm of your hand. Your born for this sort of thing.”
There was a laugh, and it seemed familiar. “I just fake it better than you. You are getting better though and… Oh? Excuse me miss. Are you okay?”
It took Jade several moments to realise the question had been directed at her. She stifled her crying, lifted up her head, and almost forgot to take a breath. Standing right before her, a concerned look on her face was Asami Sato, and beside her was Avatar Korra.
Her mind had raced all night, but now in this moment all thoughts had left. She was too surprised to think or doubt. “I… uh y-yeah. I think so.” she stammered, trying to find words caught in her throat.
Asami looked at her with such kindness in her eyes that it seemed to ease those nerves that had been inflamed all night. “Sorry if we’re bothering you.” she offered. “We just had to get away from the party for a second.” she said this like she was hinting an understanding. Trying to lift her spirits.
Jade found that she wasn’t having trouble breathing anymore. “Same, it can get crazy in there.”
Korra offered her a smile. “That’s for sure. These things are gonna drive me nuts one day.”
“Sorry, we didn’t mean to startle you.” Asami said, sympathy ringing in her voice. “If you’d rather be alone we can move on.”
“Actually, I was hoping I could talk to you… the both of you. If that’s okay.” she didn’t know why she could talk now. But the words were flowing easier than they were before.
A wide grin grew across Korra’s face. “Of course it is! Glad you caught us and we’re always happy to talk, as long as you promise you’re not an official or a reporter.” they were both so nice, it seemed to be putting her at ease. She supposed you were never really prepared to meet your heroes, and that maybe part of that was why she’d been so nervous. After being so invisible, these two had stopped, concerned over a crying girl. That meant the world to her.
She smiled, and had to take a breath, but she was no longer shaking. “I just… Hi, my name’s Jade and I just wanted… to thank both of you.” there it was out. “So much for everything you’ve both done.”
Asami smiled sweetly, and Korra looked a little blushed almost. “Don’t mind her, we we’re still getting used to this.” Asami said.
“Yeah, usually most of what we get is people telling us what to do or how to do it better.” Korra offered with a shrug. “So, a thanks is actually kinda refreshing.”
“You deserve it. I uh… Oh gosh.” She said. Reaching into her purse. She withdrew a old photo, that had crinkled in her grasp but you could still make it out. “I don’t really know how to lead into this.” She’d gone over what she would say in her head so many times before, and now she was improvising. “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.” she said. With that, she offered the picture. Korra took it and understanding seemed to cross over her face. The picture, was of Jade’s apartment, or rather her old apartment. She’d lived there with her family ever since she could remember. The picture, showed a mess. They’re entire floor had been destroyed by the spirit vines several years ago. She remembered that day vividly, as she and her parents had been nearly crushed to death by the ever writhing vines. With the vines attacking the city and the haze in the sky it had felt like the world was ending. Then the vines had stopped, just as quickly as they’d started to grow. She only found out later about what had happened, about the dark spirits, and what the avatar had done.
Korra seemed to contemplate the picture seriously, and Jade wondered how many stories like this she had heard. If any. Jade of course didn’t know either of them well, but she thought maybe hearing this would do her some good. To know what she’d done and who she’d saved. It was all well and good to read about it in the paper, but she wanted to give her thanks in person. She wondered if enough people had thanked her.
“I’m glad you weren’t hurt.” Korra said, a pained look on her face. “Sorry I wasn’t faster.”
Jade shook her head. “Oh! No you were amazing!” she insisted. “I’d never blame you” she smiled, energy was returning to her now. “And I can never thank you enough miss Korra.” she beamed, and turned back to her purse. “Oh! And see? It all turned out okay because…” she withdrew another picture. This one she handed to Miss Sato. “A few weeks later, we had a new place to live. Then in a few months, we went back home.” Their building had been renovated and added to in those following months. It wasn’t the same room, but it felt close enough to matter. “You gave us our home back Miss Sato. More than that. With the city in such a mess, mom had lost her job and things weren’t looking so great. She wanted to give back, and so she got hired by your company, to help bring republic city back to its feet. She’s still there now.”
Asami looked at the picture for a long time, and her smile warmed Jade’s heart. This picture was of their new home, and the whole family together, smiling and happy. She looked up to Jade with a shimmer in her eyes, before clearing her throat. “I don’t know what to say. I’m just so glad we could help however we could.” she said, flashing a look to Korra. Something, something deep seemed to pass between the two of them in that moment. “I know you’re mother well, she’s pretty brilliant with a spanner.”
“Good to know we’re doing something worthwhile out there.” Korra said in a tender voice. “It’s important to remember the lives that are affected by what we do and to not lose sight of people like you.” Jade smiled, the way she said that, it sounded very much like the avatar. The one all the kids learned about and idolize.
“It’s our turn to thank you.” Asami smiled in such a way that conveyed a long history of loss. “I think Korra and I needed this right now.” Asami bowed, and was about to hand the pictures back.
“You can keep them. If they’ll do you any good.” Jade said, bowing in return.
“I think they will.” Asami answered.
“I just… wanted to thank you both in person. You’ve changed my life so much I…” she flushed a little. “I hope it’s not weird to say, but I’ve looked up to both of you for a long time. You’ve done more for me than I can…” she hesitated now, stumbling over her words. She knew she would when she got to this part. Her eyes flicked between them, standing their, happily and together. “You saved my life more than once.” she finally managed. She recognized how shy she was right now, how she was averting her gaze. She probably looked like a nervous kid. “You both showed me that… I’m okay. That I shouldn’t hide who I am… that I can be myself.” they'd been something she could look up to. Something she could admire. Seeing them, having heroes like that had helped her more than words could say.
Both women picked up on what she meant quickly and again a look of understanding passed between them. “There’s no one else to be.” Korra said with a wink.
Asami smiled with such warmth. “And there’s nothing to hide. Yourself is wonderful Jade.”
“Thank you… so much.” Jade was close to tears. She’d never told anyone that about herself before. Never shared that part of herself. To have it accepted so kindly without hesitation, was nothing short of incredible. She bowed again, and came up with a true smile. “I don’t want to keep you guys away anymore.”
Korra laughed. “You were doing us a favor, and we appreciate it.”
“If you ever need anything, or anyone to talk to, don’t hesitate to find us again.” Asami beamed. “In fact in a few years, if you want I’m always looking for incredible ladies at Future Industries. If that doesn’t sound too hokey to work with your mom.” She laughed to herself.
“Thanks, I’ll remember that.” Jade said. “Thank you both so much again. It was amazing meeting you! Have a great night.”
“It was lovely meeting you too.” Asami grinned.
“And thank you too!” Korra offered. They waved, and returned through the door where they came from.
Jade sat back on the sofa, her knees were shaking again, but this time for entirely different reasons. Her breathing was steady, and her heart wasn’t pounding in her chest. She’d done it. She shared what she had to, and hadn’t fainted while doing it. It all felt, so amazing to say out loud. It felt, genuine and true. She felt better than she had for a long time.
“Nothing to hide.” she repeated to herself. She was so thankful to have met them. A few words of kindness, sometimes made all the difference. She was alive because of them, and more than that she got the chance to be herself.
She’d rather be no one else.