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Amnesty and Pink Terrors

Summary:

What is a normal day in lazy town. Robbie could tell you for sure it wasn't Glanni barging in to ruin his life or a nervous elf too scared of his new discovery to treat him like a normal person. Perfect.

Notes:

Soo i did a thing again. Once more no beta and i can't spell very well so my bad guys. This is my attempt at a continuation so don't hate it ya'll. I'm like on the third bottle into my wine stash rn and i got class in the morning. Its probably trash but I'm trash so at least we match. Also if you guys get my references then great. I kinda wanna make it a scavenger hunt in a way. I'm pretty sure I fit a Shrek one in there. Oh well enjoy my trash

Work Text:

He could feel the skin of his stomach stretched tight. His pup was squirming inside.The fabric of the armchair was soft and familiar as he relaxed. There was a fire burning in the fireplace, the warmth and light it cast, made the room feel cosy. He recognised the feeling of happiness and safety. The kids were all asleep on his fluffy carpet. A variety of snacks, from 'sports candy' to actual candy, spread amongst them. The yellow one. Stinky. No no Stingy. That's it. Was laid upon his arm rest sitting near his swollen stomach. The hatch opened and closed and the swift noise of someone jumping down reached Robbie's ears. Then two strong arms wrapped around his shoulders. A smooth cheek grazed against his own. “I’m home,” a happy accented voice whispered softly. Robbie recognized it instantly. “Sport,” he said with fondness. “How were the kids?” The Alpha asked. The answer came natural to Robbie. “You know they are never really settled when you aren’t around-"

"PUMPKIN! Daddy's home!"

With that proclamation, Robbie woke up in fright and instantly coward into his chair as a tall, familiar, man in a pink eyesore strolled in. Six massive luggages left by the entrance as he made his way over to the chair.

"Aren't you a pleasant sight to see. I love the sex hair, it's so much more stylish than your Elvis gig. Or, did you just come out of a heat?" Glanni teased with a laugh as he took in the disheveled appearance of his younger cousin.

"W-well." Robbie started as he finally took in his reflection in one of his shinier machines. His hair was obviously a mess. Without pomade, it fell out of it regular pompadour and into his makeup less eyes from the right and flattened on the left side where he had slept on it.

"Oh my darling." Glanni gushed as he pulled Robbie from his chair and pressed Robbie's head close to his chest. "Did you spend your heat alone?!? My poor cousin! It's obviously not because of your appearance. You inherited my looks, so I know you could get anyone you wanted."

"Glanni..." Robbie groaned as his back arched in protest at being held at an odd angle. But at the same time, his inner omega found solace in the familiar smell of a family alpha after the high stress he’d gone through. Even though it was acutely obvious that he hadn't showered in a long while. A very long while.

"Seriously, you don't even have that awful gel in your hair right now. You do realize that it's ruining your hair right?" Glanni gushed as he ran a hand through Robbie's hair. All while maintaining Robbie's head firmly pressed against his chest. "Well, it's surprisingly still healthy. Let me style your hair. I can make it look great without all that disgusting shit you lather into it." Glanni remarked as he slowly played with Robbie's hair.

"Glanni."

"I'm not hearing a no. So we'll do it after we clean up this mess of a home." Glanni said with a sly smile releasing Robbie's head with a shove to observe the mess. Oblivious, or uncaring, that he made him unbalanced.

"Glanni." Robbie tried again as he stumbled back slightly, before regaining his balance. Standing awkwardly to the left of his cousin who was scrutinizing HIS lair.

"What you annoying little thing, I'm thinking." Glanni growled turning sharply, attention drawn back to his disheveled cousin.

"I use pomade not gel."

"Same shit. Robin darling, what in the hell is with your interior design? Why is everything navy? And with orange! I thought I taught you better than this." Glanni gestured to the room with wide arms and a disappointed stare directed toward Robbie.

"You raised me for like six years, before you left me at the circus, ALONE, to go on the run from your elf.”

"Best six years of your damn life! A plus parenting." Glanni yelled with a sharp smile resting carefully on his cane. Robbie quietly thought back to the single family picture he had of his childhood. Well that's if you count a newspaper clipping a family photo. What clipping you ask? Well it's the one where Glanni had stolen the Delong Star Ruby with an infant Robbie swaddled tightly to his chest of course.

"...Sure it was. And I don't like plastic flamingos in my house. They look tacky."

"They are beautiful and bring sophistication to any household they lay claim to!"

"They really don't." Robbie said with a deadpan expression. He could feel a headache beginning to unfold, as he saw the anger in his cousin’s eyes. He let out an exhausted sigh before looking at the dark blue interior of his lair feeling very insulted. "That doesn't mean my interior design skills are garbage."

"Pumpkin. That. Chair. Is. Atrocious!" Glanni exclaimed pointing at his favorite chair. "Shag fur was popular in the seventies! Even then, I thought it was tacky."

Robbie let out a loud gasp his hand placed a hand dramatically over his heart. A retort laid on the tip of his tongue but instead he pursed his lips and started to push his cousin backwards toward his chair. Obviously he didn't understand how great his chair was and only a hands on demonstration would ultimately help him understand.

"Hey- what are you. Doing. Robin!" Glanni protested as he tried planting his feet firmly to the ground. "Keep me away from that monstrosity. I'll get lice!"

With one hard shove, one with strength that honestly surprised Robbie himself, Glanni went flying into the chair. There was a moment of silence before Glanni spoke again.

"This is the greatest fucking chair that has had the pleasure to hold me."

"Finally"


 

Robbie wasn't even sure how he found himself in these situations anymore. One minute he's mopping the floor clean while Glanni made himself at home in the guest bedroom, he had brought his ENTIRE wardrobe with him, and now he's wrestling with him in navy shorts and a black wife beater to stop him from buying disgusting furniture with HIS card. Not that money was really the factor here. Rotten-Ltd was a thriving business after all. It was more about principle of the thing. The provocative clothing is all due to Glanni, of course. Apparently cleaning in anything that's not remotely sexy is a crime. No matter your sex or relation. It was so much easier to play along then to argue, at least that’s what he’s learned through experience.

With his rotten luck, someone just had to barged in the exact moment Robbie had successfully managed to pin his cousin/father figure to the floor.

"Oh...."

The pink one. It had to be Sportacus's mini me. If she's here that means the entire- and with a series of bangs four more children dropped into his lair. OF COURSE. His god damn luck.

"Whoa! I always knew you were gay!! I always thought it would be with someone else though!"

It's the loud girl. Robbie tensed up and turned toward his cousin who was watching amused. With the online purchases momentarily forgotten, Glanni turned a curious, almost affectionate glance toward the children. Robbie felt another headache begin to make an appearance as he processed what Tricky said.

"And I always knew you were a child. A very loud child. Get lost I'm busy."

The tiny alpha let out a laugh. It's laughing uncontrollably at me. Robbie thought bitterly, left eye twitching, as everyone watched Trixie. "We can see that! You're busy getting bus--"

"Trixie!!!" The pink one yelled covering Zippers ears. Robbie could feel his nose twitching in distaste.

"What?" Trixie whinnied before motioning to him. "Look at them. They were obviously doing something before we came in. What are the chances that we're wrong? Look at their clothes pinky!!! Wait, why do your shorts ask if you're nasty?" Robbie could feel his cousin's laugh begin vibrate from under him. His patience was beginning to wear thin. Very thin. First his unexpected heat, then Sportaflop dropping in, than Glanni dropping in, and now the children literally dropping in. He needs a vacation away from everyone.

"What do you want brats." He growled through his teeth. Irritation slipping into his voice, only making Glanni chuckle even more, especially since he bought the flamingos when Robbie wasn't looking. He swears, if it's because of some dumb reason like forgetting a party. Or Sugar Pie escaping again. Or just being blamed for someone else’s incompetence. Then he's going to deflate all the balls in town.

"What did you do to Sportacus." The yellow, rather spoilt, omega asked impatiently. Sticking his nose up in the air.

Wait....... "What!?" Robbie exclaimed releasing Glanni’s wrists only to throw his hands upward dramatically. The nerve of these kids. Not every bad thing that happens in their little down is pin pointed to him.

"What did you do to Sportacus." Pinky repeated crossing her arms and giving him her best look of disapproval.

"Why do you think I did something? I haven't left my lair for a week!" Robbie exclaimed as Glanni got a mischievous glint in his eyes and he gathered more information about his darling Robin.

"He's been acting strange for the past four days! Ever since he went to check on you! He's been jumpy, sad, unfocused, he's been doing more sports than normal, and he's been on edge. He even yelled at Stingy! He apologized, of course, but is so unlike him! What did you do."

Robbie sat there flabbergasted and a bit angry. He hadn't done a single thing to the damn flippity floppity elf. If anything it's the other way around. That's it all the balls are going to be deflated. As he opened his mouth to tell them he had nothing to do with it, Glanni began to laugh uncontrollably breaking the tension.

"Rosy, darling, it sounds like this 'Sportacus' fellow, Jesus fucking christ what an awful name, is sexually frustrated for whatever reason. Taking it out on my cream puff won't help you or him in any way."

"Cream puff?" Trixie asked with a loud giggle but was quickly ignored as Ziggy asked a simple question that caused the room to fill with a deafening silence.

"What is sexually frustrated? Is he gonna die from it?"

.....

.....

.....

Robbie tore his eyes from the confused little iggy to gaze the room. Poodle and Stinky were staring wide eyed at everything but the candy boy. Loud girl seemed to be struggling to breath for whatever reason. Probably trying to hold back her mischievous nature to avoid ruining the boys innocence. He’s was like ....3 right? Something like that. Pinky seemed put out but gratefully she stayed silent. Glanni. Now Glanni was the real problem. He had that glint in his eye. The glint, that shown his true nature beyond his control. His face may seem impassive but the glint always gave him away. In those stone pools, former memories of cruel tricks and those of opportunity shined brightly like a supernova. It was an omen for danger that was bounded with the package known as Glanni. As the glint slyly turned towards him, making eye contact, Robbie knew if he didn’t act quick shit was about to go down.

"It's when-"

"That's enough from you!" Robbie yelled at covering Glanni’s mouth with a hand. Before turning to address Ziggy with wide worried eyes. "It's something you ask your parents when you're older and I'm long gone and dead!" With a dramatic pointing of his chest.

Ziggy pouted and made some very pathetic sad puppy eyes toward the two adults. "Will he d-"

"NO!" Robbie yelled waving his hand frantically. Seeing Ziggy flinch and frightened look made him soften his tone considerably.

"N-no. He will not... die from.....se........ frustration." He couldn't help but release a sigh of relief as the smaller beta’s body language relaxed dramatically.

"How do we make him better?"

"All he has to do is fu-"

"What did I just say Glanni!"

"What was he going to say?"

"Something very bad. Please trust me on that." Robbie grumbled with a slight shudder and shot an annoyed look to his his cousin who was portraying a perfect portrait of innocence that Robbie knew he never had.

"He should be able to get over it himself. It's.... something he needs to tackle on himself. Why don't you brats make him a get well card..... or something. Just... leave me alone."

They kids all look at one another before big grins grew on their faces. Yells of 'Good idea', 'I'm going to draw an apple', and 'We'll my card will be the best because it's mine.' Quickly echoed off the high ceiling as they all scampered toward the exit. Well almost all of them.

The pink one, why is always the pink one, trailed behind, waiting at the bottom of the ladder as the latch shut from above, releasing a loud CLUD.

"You know what Robbie?" Pinky said with a disgustingly enduring smile. Causing Robbie to sigh dramatically and look toward the ceiling in despair.

"What now."

"Underneath it all, you actually quite nice."

"Repeat that disgusting slander again and you'll be hearing from my lawyers. Now get out!"


 

"So, which one's yours." Glanni asked with a sharp grin as Robbie jumped off of him as if scolded with hot water.

"None of them!"

"What? I can't make grandkids by myself. Aunty made you, I raised you, I did my share of the job. Now you have to pick up the slack." Glanni complained as he stood and dusted imaginary dirt off himself. Appearance is everything after all.

"I don't want to carry any pups." Robbie hissed as he made his way toward the fridge. He bent over, frowning as he surveyed the lack of food in his fridge. Fjandinn hafi það. Now he has no choice but to go to the store.

"BAH- you're wasting our family genes. Look! You even inherited your mother's hips and ass. And she had a great ass! You'll carry just fine."

"I don't like the idea of being pregnant." Robbie mumbled as he made a mental list of what to pick up at the store.

"You're being selfish."

There was a moment of silence as Robbie slowly turned to stare at his cousin in utter disbelief. The nerve-

"Any conversation I have with you is always an argument. I'm going to the store." Robbie grunted as made his way to his disguise machine.

"Let's go then. We'll pick up some necessities while we're out." Robbie shot him an look of dubiety and rolled his eye. I swear out of all my body parts, I'm sure my eyes in the best shape. I must've done at least 50 eye rolls since he’s been here. He thought silently as he spun into his normal attire.

"Honey bunches of oats, what the fuck is that tacky stripped eyesore. I swear I can make out every detail of your ass in that outfit! What happened to no pups? Hmm? It make you seem like your trying to show off your best assets. Not without my approval your not! Don't think I forgot about fixing you hair either!"

"Sweet Jesus. Let's go Christian Grey. The store closes in two hours and we're going to need both of them."

"Not dressed like that we won't!"


Glanni had managed to pull together a nice outfit without leather.

Tight dark purple jeans with a shiny black belt, a crisp white button down with a thin dark grey tie, covered by a form fitting black vest, and a matching dark grey midi coat to cover him from the chill. Shiny black shoes showed his reflection and Glanni applied the finishing touches to his hair.

“Now you’re almost as gorgeous as me! Let’s go see what this town has to offer!”

“You’re not trying to set me up again Glanni.”

“It’s my job as your court alpha to provide everything for you. Don’t worry cream puff, I’ll only allow the very best for my favorite cousin!”

“First of all, that rule is dead since we’re not in the forest. Secondly, according to the court neither of us exist, which makes your position useless twice over.”

“Bet.”


Shopping was worst.

Never would he thought he could have a bad experience buying sweets yet here he was.

Glanni has gotten into an argument with an elderly lady over a canned ham. It wasn’t even the last one. It had started as a simple bickerment but the lady had some spunk. He must’ve started a physical fight with her or something when Robbie left him in the deli section because when he returned to the site Glanni was gone and a scuffed up elderly lady held triumphantly to the can of hickory honey ham. The store was too silent, so Glanni must’ve been forcefully removed from the premises. Robbie sighed and walked to the register to pay.

When life gives you lemons, say thank you I guess.


Glanni was seated on the curb, a pair of handcuffs laying innocently open beside him, filing his nails to a more distinctive coven shape.

“I was trying to avoid any trouble Glanni.”

“What a horrible way to live pudding.”

“......Why are you like this?” Robbie groaned as he ran a hand down his face. This just wasn’t his week.

“Oh honey buns it’s real simple. I—.” Glanni paused as his eyes scouted something in the distance. A Cheshire grin slowly grew on his face and all Robbie could do was groan in despair about the headache that was bound to appear.

“My, my, my, maybe there is a reason you choose to lay claim over this backwash of a town. With a fine cut of kobe beef like that running around I might’ve as well. Have you ever had him bend you over in your chair. Ooo or perhaps in the shower. That one is personally my favorite and I wouldn’t mind trying it out with this beefcake. Though he seems a bit shorter then I’d prefer. But his muscle make up for it more than enough. Seems a bit energetic but a few rounds should ease that up no problem.” While Glanni gushed over this ‘beefcake’. Robbie was staring off into space hoping for this nightmare to end. It has to be a nightmare right? Glanni wouldn’t talk like this in front of him. No way!

Oh who is he fooling if course he would. Only thing he’s missing now was the awkward predicament that came from Glanni flirting that ultimately leads to him being the third wheel and the pack mule all in one go. Great.

“OH. Would you look at that. Beefcake is gazing over here. Check me up darling, do I look good?” Glanni stated fixing his posture and flaunting his curves like a peacock would it’s tail feathers. With an eye roll Robbie gazed at his cousins outfit and noticed a bit of dirt from the scuffle on his pant leg. Dirt really does cling to leather in the most atrocious ways doesn’t it? As he bent to wipe it off he was startled by a yell.

“IF YOU’RE GOING TO STARE AT MY SON’S ASS AT LEAST BE SUBTLE ABOUT IT, GODDAMN!”

“Glanni were in public and you’re not my father.”

“I might as well be. Now show your father some respect.”

“I really do hate you sometimes.” Robbie pinched the bridge of his nose before turning to see who this ‘beefcake’ was. Hell if he was cute he may be good for a short time rather than a long time. As he gazed toward the direction of the beefcake his heart fell straight to his ass. Fuck. Of fucking course.

“Glanni we’re leaving.”

“Pumpkin, this could be your ch-“

“Leaving now. Good bye. See you later.” He cut in. Normally he would humor Glanni’s persistence. But not over this. Not over what happened. Especially not over HIM.


Within 5 minutes of reaching his lair. Carrying almost all the bags. Except the one that Glanni held that contained nothing but a cake he was exhausted. Both physically and mentally, Robbie was ready to clonk out if his insomnia let him tonight.

As Glanni complained about holding a single bag. Robbie pushed himself to put away the remaining groceries and shove Glanni into his room for some much needed silence. Eyes closed. He enjoyed the rare silence for one, beautiful, harmonious second. Just as he inhaled a sharp knock on the hatch cause him to choke on his air. With a full body wiggle of pent up frustration he angrily made his way the the ladder. Those brats better steer clear of his lair after this if they knew what was good for them.

...

With adrenaline and aggression on his side, the newly repaired hatch opened with more ferocity then it really needed. He will lube its hinges up as an apology later on. But right now. He had pests to rid himself of. “What!”

Oh for fucks sake.

Staring at the floor was Glanni’s ‘beefcake’. Or otherwise known as the annoying blue elf. His best friend. Sportacus...

Who seemed to find his shoes very interesting at the moment. Even though he’s the one that knocked and interrupted his silence. Plus his ‘athletic’ wear shoes were hideous. They served their purpose, yes, but did he have to wear the same ones every day? Surely there were other styles available. More, attractive ones no? Goodness he need to say something. He was getting too in his head, Glaring down obviously wasn’t helping the elf who bright red, and currently scuffing the tip of his shoe against the ground.

“If you have something to say, right now is the perfect time to keep it to yourself.”

Ouch. Too spicy Robbie. He realized as the elf flinched slightly as if he’d been physically hit rather than verbally.

“I. Look I’m sorry Sportaflop. Let me try that again.” With a deep breath Robbie looked in the direction of the nervous elf. Why was he so worried? This barely had anything to do with him?

“Errr... nice weather today. Don’t you agree?” He tried awkwardly cringing at his own attempt at ‘normal’ conversation. Luckily for him it was enough to brighten the flippity floppers demeanor. With bright eyes, an equally bright smile was thrown his way. Before it dimmed in a more meek smile as his eyes down casted once more

“Were you ever going to tell me Robbie?”

Such a simple question shouldn’t have brought so much weight onto his shoulders and heart. He couldn’t help the smallest flare of anger that rose in him. It wasn’t any of Sportaflop’s business of what secrets Robbie kept to himself. It wasn’t hurting anyone but himself and that shouldn’t be his concern. Robbie was a grown man. But he knew that in the end of it all, the anger was useless. His secret was out in the open and he could either try denying it and in the long run make it worse. Or just try to live his life as normally as possible. It’s not like would being an omega is such a bad thing in a town with such a small population.

“Uh… I wasn’t planning on telling you, or anyone really …about this.” This was awkward; so very awkward.

“No, there’s no need for you to apologize. It was my fault for barging in as I did. I should have knocked before entering your home. My crystal was blinking so ferociously I had thought you were in serious need of…” A small cough; did he really have to cough? It’s awkward enough. And is that a blush? . “Assistance.” Besides for modesty, that was.

Robbie gave an inward sigh of aggravation as a small spike of arousal tingled all the way down his spine at the small memory. “No…I had it covered.” Not well enough though since he probably traumatized Sportacus for life. Not to mention it feels like the itch never really got scratched. Merely poked, which made the itch much more noticeable. “I mean, I took care of it myself.”

“…would you like any future help?” Whispered (wanting).

“Huh?” Wait, what?

“Is there any way I can help you?” Firmer now; certain and determined.

Robbie hated himself for letting his knees get weak at the sound; his heat really took a toll on him. It was fine though; he could live without the mother henning and biology for a lifetime if he could. “N-no Thanks, just try to be quiet, I didn’t get much sleep done. You know, with my h-heat and all.”

“Ok Robbie, if you need anything I’m just a letter away?”

Robbie swallowed. He probably didn’t mean to imply the anything with anything. It was just the post heat hormones making anything sound vulgar. Yeah, must be. No way he would want Robbie right? “Sure. Yeah. Bye.” Softer; reluctant and mumbled.

“Robbie.”

“What!”

“Your nature changes nothing of how I see you. You're still my villain.” There was a quaver in Sportacus’s voice and something in Robbie shifted. Crumbling, piece by piece. Wanting and fearful.

“Yeah, yeah…” His throat was dry and the chuckle that he tried to make tripped on its way out of his mouth. “Don’t you have some children to pester into being loud. Or something.”

“Goodbye, Robbie.”

And by the time the footsteps faded from his ears, a bitter chuckle rose from his chest. Didn’t change, huh? Right.

Robbie ought to tell Sportacus he was a shitty liar one of these days. Especially if he expected to lie in front of the children.

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