Archive of Our Own

There’s someone I like.  

Min Yoongi is very much a straight man. He’s pretty sure that he likes tits over a dick. Would bet his precious university savings on it.  

They have pretty eyes, pale skin, and cute lips like a porcelain doll.  

Yoongi, like any person, has an ideal type. He wants to be called oppa, would prefer it if they were shorter than him, and wants them to be an independent someone who stands up for their values. He doesn’t want a pretty airhead by his side – he wants a woman of substance. It's not like he thinks girls are stupid – it’s the stupid idiots who want to be control freaks around him that unfortunately influence a large portion of the female population to forego their individuality. It's hella fucking sucky. 

They're always smiling. It makes them look cute.  

Lee Ji-eun fits his ideal type quite nicely. She was strong, stood up for herself, was really pretty – and had a voice gifted by angels. She was in his Biological Sciences lectures, and he first heard her sing in a Christmas fundraising event in their first year.   

They make me feel happy. My heart flutters a little when I see them.  

Here's the thing; Ji-eun doesn’t make him feel that way. It's a little unfortunate. Sure, she’s a great person, anyone would have to be an idiot to not see that, but there just wasn’t anything...there. It's slightly confusing to say the least, because he can’t think of anyone else he’d like, when she was right in front of him.  

I'd go to great lengths to do things, if it makes them happy.  

Parties aren’t really Yoongi’s scene, but here he is drinking away in a corner with Jimin because Jungkook wouldn’t stop talking about this dumb party where he could show his friends that he had ‘cool hyungs’.  

Yoongi swore that the brat had everyone wrapped around his finger.  

I really like this person, but I can’t figure out who it is.  

Jimin wasn’t usually Yoongi’s drinking partner, it was usually Seokjin, because watching the older male work himself up into hysterics was a never-aging form of entertainment. But Seokjin was slaving over some med school work at the moment, so he’d decided to decline the invite. Jimin could hold his liquor well, much to Yoongi’s boredom, and that meant that his current conversation was very much a sober one – well, as sober as one could be with all that alcohol in their system.  

He thinks he hears his liver cry.  

Jimin leans back in the sagging sofa with a plastic cup nursed in his hands. He looks like he walked straight out of an anime; his devil-may-care looks and the obnoxiously coloured hair that somehow manages to look good on him did nothing to remove him from that aesthetic either. The dye was courtesy of a dare that he’d lost against Seokjin, but Jimin had taken all of its tangerine orange in his stride. Yoongi thinks to himself that if Jimin ever decided that Biochemistry wasn’t his forte, he would make a good model. In fact, he’s told Jimin that before, but the younger had complained about having knobbly knees or something of similar stupidity.  

“Hyung,” Jimin begins. He's frowning just a little. “It sounds like you’re talking about Jungkook.” 

What the fuck. 

Yoongi reels back a little. He’s not sure if he’s a little thrown because Jimin seems to equate his descriptions to that of Jungkook – does Jimin think of Jungkook like that? – or if he’s a little weirded out by the fact that Jungkook is too much like a close friend to him for their conversation to turn to him about potential interests – who were originally supposed to be female, might he add.  

“Jimin, what the hell are you talking about – out of the thousands of students in this university campus, you say Jungkook?”  

Jimin has the audacity to simply shrug “I don’t know hyung. I’m just saying. I’m not exactly familiar with your friends apart from our group, but you don’t exactly hang out with other girls. And no offence, but you don’t go out of your way to do things for people you don’t know well either, so that really just leaves our group.” 

Jeon Jungkook was a freshman and the youngest and newest addition in Yoongi’s ragtag group of friends. He was openly gay within their circle and quite strong minded about the rights and injustices faced by the LGBTQ community. He was a passionate kid, and though he’d admitted to not ever having been in a relationship before, he just wanted love. The most charming part of Jungkook was the fact that despite his fierce zeal was the fact that he was so incredibly sweet – and everyone loved that about him. He and Namjoon got on extremely well – with Jungkook having transferred from the States to Korea in his last year of high school, both of them spent lots of time talking extensively about a myriad of things in English. Jungkook could mesh well wit almost anyone, and he was the final puzzle piece in their circle that made them...whole, Yoongi supposes. He’s a cute Psychology undergraduate – and everybody’s dongsaeng – with a penchant for wearing his ratty Timberlands with fucking everything, and the rest of the group would agree with the sentiment. 

Yoongi looks at him in horror. He’s desperately trying to avoid getting angry at Jimin – but his temper seems to have shortened with all the alcohol, so he just settles for gritting his teeth.  

“This isn’t a joke, Jimin. I don’t even like guys.”  

Jimin takes a sip from his cup and scratches at a weird stain on his jeans. It could be ketchup, or residual acrylic paint from whenever he stops over at Taehyung’s dorm. “I’m not saying you do, hyung. All I’m saying is that with everything you’ve said, it just sounds like Jungkook to me. Like, you could’ve said you don’t want to come to the party tonight, but you didn’t. You'd have totally said no if it was any of us. And you really have a soft spot for the kid.” he pouts “He doesn’t even call me hyung.” he tacks on as an afterthought.  

Yoongi feels a little sick “If this is what you’re basing all of this on, it’s pretty weak, even for you Jimin-ah. I only said I was coming because Jin bailed. I would have come for you guys too, you know. Have some faith.”  

Jimin looks up at him. He seems a little resigned. “Okay, hyung.”  

Yoongi doesn’t like that tone. And he doesn’t appreciate Jimin’s eyes. He doesn’t like it one bit. Now, if Yoongi was a little bit more sober, he wouldn’t have brushed it off with a laugh, told Jimin that his brain cells were all finally dying and left it at that. But for his poor alcohol addled brain, it was all too much and he’d had enough. “Oh, fuck right off.” he hisses at Jimin before rising angrily from the sofa. He turns away from the terribly confused orange-haired young man to storm off down the fraternity house, and ignores the calls made by the younger boy. The room smells too much like puke and weed and he’s feeling a little dizzy when he pushes past the throngs of university students. He wants to leave. So he makes his way through to the back door of the frat house, and squeezes past a group of freshman who are taking a drag and catches the tail of a sentence.

“...and that Jungkook guy’s a fag as well. Fucking nasty. Who knew the university let in freaks like that?” 

Yoongi’s heart lurches and his fists clench. All he feels is the blood roaring in his ears and red hot anger. 

It should be noted that Yoongi hates fighting. He remembers what freshman and sophomore year of high school was like. He knows what it feels like to taste blood on his tongue and feel grit in split knuckles. He shivers at the memory of getting addicted to the pain that came after a brawl with bleeding lips and bruised eyes. Yoongi hates fighting with every fibre of his being.  

He doesn’t think about that though when he asks the group to repeat what they say, because nobody insults his friends when he's around. They look at him with a smug sort of authority, and Yoongi wonders if it's just because they were taller than him. Fuck these kids, what do their parents feed them these days for them to look as long as beanpoles?  “Didn’t you hear, that Jeon guy is a homo?”   

Yoongi levels his gaze with the prick and shrugs “So what if he’s gay? It's not like he’s asking to suck your dick or anything, right? Leave him alone.” Yoongi wants to recoil at his crude manner of speaking, but his mouth is running off without his brain to filter and compartmentalise. Maybe it's the alcohol, maybe it's the anger – it's all one and the same to him right now. The guy sneers. “You his mother or something? Picking fights for Jeon – at least choose them with someone your own size, yeah?”  

Someone behind the person speaking elbows him, mutters something about ‘Hey, Minyoung, watch it. That’s Yoongi – Jeon hangs with hi-’  

The guy never gets to finish his sentence because Yoongi’s already thrown his fist. It collides fantastically against the asshole’s jaw and sends him sprawling to the ground with a pained grunt. He stands over Minyoung with narrowed eyes. “How fucking dare you.” He reaches down to pull the younger man up by his t-shirt collar and Minyoung’s fingers scrabble against Yoongi’s when Yoongi shoves him up to his knees brusquely. There’s a lot of movement as the kid’s friends move out of the way. The hallway is filled with shouts as the two tussle and roughhouse and people rush off to avoiding getting caught in the mix. The boy yelps as Yoongi throws him against a wall “Speak to your elders and your damn peers with some fucking respect, why don’t you?”  

Yoongi is angry. So he throws a random cup he sees lying around at Minyoung’s head. It bounces off comically and the cocktail for a hangover that was inside splashes over the walls. The kid whimpers. It’s pretty obvious that the boy isn’t used to fighting, probably never has fought in his entire life. Just enough to scare him, don’t do any real damage, he thinks to himself. “You think you’re hot shit, don’t you? Throwing slurs – did your daddy teach you that one?” Minyoung scrambles back with a hand nursing his jaw. The two are breathing hard, sizing each other up and Yoongi steps forward with fire bubbling on the tip of his tongue. He opens his mouth to bark out a few choice words when there’s a quiet “Yoongi-hyung?”  

Yoongi whips around to see a confused Jungkook looking at him. The young boy was wearing one of those fake glasses with no actual lenses in them and his hair was covered in fucking glitter. Various Sharpie doodles were sketched across his face and he should have looked absolutely stupid in this situation, but he doesn’t and Yoongi can’t help the drop in his gut.  

I really like someone.  

Hyung it sounds like you’re talking about Jungkook.  

...you’re talking about Jungkook.  

I like someone.  

...talking about Jungkook.  

I like....  

Jungkook?  

Oh no.  

The sickening feeling is back. Yoongi feels like he’s going to throw up. Jungkook walks towards him, confusion in his eyes. “Yugyeom said that there was a scuffle and that –” he peers over Yoongi’s shoulder and deflates a little. Yoongi's brows furrow a little when Jungkook lets out a little sigh “Oh. It’s you again.”  

Isn’t it weird that emotions are such fickle things? Yoongi certainly thinks so because when Jungkook says again, the bubbling in his gut isn’t to do with uncertainty or nausea anymore. It’s because this isn’t the first time that Jungkook has been bothered by the freshman on the floor. A crowd of half-drunk university students begin to collect around the doors and Yoongi turns back to face Minyoung “Again? This isn’t the first time you’ve done this?” He reaches for the collar of the young man again when Jungkook’s hands pull him back “Hyung. Stop. He's not worth it.”  

It’s so horribly chiché but the touch on Yoongi’s skin left by Jungkook’s hands burn in a way that they’ve never done before. It feels so electrifying – almost as if his skin will start humming where Jungkook hold him. Yoongi looks back at Jungkook, and the poor boy looks so used to it that Yoongi is shaking with anger – so much anger and hurt and confusion. Because where did the young boy who didn’t take shit from anyone go? Why won’t he do anything to stop him?  

“How do you let him even touch you?” Minyoung shouts and Yoongi just seethes because after all the punches he’d thrown, the bastard still had the gall to open his mouth. Jungkook's face crumples. And Yoongi has just about had it at that point.

Yoongi rips his arms away from Jungkook, and the young boy lets go of Yoongi like he's being shocked. Yoongi goes into the kitchen, returning a few seconds later with a pitcher full of crappy punch and tips it over Minyoung’s head. The freshman sputters in shock as ice-cold alcohol and fruit juice splatters over him. In his gut, Yoongi feels the old tug of wanting to humiliate the boy so much that he wouldn't dare speak out again, but he reigns it in and settles for the satisfaction that the asshole is speechless for now. 

Yoongi wordlessly thrusts the empty jug into Jungkook’s arms, ignoring the absolute shock on the younger boy’s face and throws the back door open. There’s the laugh of some half-drunk university students as they take in the chaos that is the alcohol soaked Minyoung. He hopes nobody follows him out. 

He leaves the frat house that night with his thoughts in complete disarray.  

The cold air doesn’t do much to sober him up, but with the goosebumps that prickle up over his arms another thought comes to him. He immediately pushes it down. 

Yoongi  really fucking hates parties.

When he wakes up the morning it’s not because his temple feels like its being hammered in; he spent too much time in the safety of his room with countless cups of water and a calm playlist for a measly hangover to affect him. He wakes up because Seokjin had entered his room and thrown open his curtains. Yoongi shoots him a glare that has long since lost its effect on the medical student. “Heard last night was...eventful.” the older male says conversationally. Yoongi groans and sits up in bed. There’s a glint in Seokjin’s eyes, which means that he knows there’s more. Yoongi sighs “How much do you know?”

Seokjin fishes out his phone and then throws it to Yoongi lightly “Check my Snapchat stories,” he sits down at the foot of Yoongi’s bed. Yoongi frowns and rubs his eyes before flicking through Seokjin’s phone. He opens up a random person’s story and there’s a grainy video. His stomach feels funny. There on the screen is clearly Yoongi as he empties an entire punch pitcher on Minyoung on the floor. Someone stands behind Yoongi, with glasses, a scribbled on face and sparkling hair. The video gets cut off after Yoongi shoves the empty jug back to Jungkook. He silently gives back the phone to Seokjin, who takes it with a blank face. “Jimin also told me that he’d managed to piss you off because the two of you were talking about-” 

“Don’t you have a morning lecture today, hyung?” 

Seokjin breathes through his nose harshly, and ignores the fact that Yoongi’s interrupted him. His gaze turns a little bit more sharper though, and Yoongi feels like he’s under the scrutiny of his mother. It’s kind of weird. “I told you last week that my lectures today would be cancelled. We’d made plans for brunch and the gym today, remember.” It’s not a question that was meant to jog or lightly prompt Yoongi’s memory – it was a non-verbal statement telling Yoongi to get his act together. The older male tucks his phone back into his pocket and toes the jumper on Yoongi’s floor. “You’re lucky that the little tussle between you and the freshman is staying quiet otherwise you would have been in some trouble. Most people just got in for the punch part of it – only Minyoung’s little group, Yugyeom and our friends know of the actual physical shit that went down.” 

Yoongi wants to pout because he didn’t do much harm. He settles for a scowl instead. “I didn’t hurt the kid bad.” 

Seokjin looks at him with a little exasperation “I know you didn’t. And Kook knows that too. Most of us, bar Minyoung and his group, understand why you did what you did. What they said was messed up and you really have a soft spot for Kook. Nobody is mad Yoongi – not anyone who deserves a say in the matter, anyway. Besides, Jungkook wouldn’t be able to cope if you were on probation for violent behaviour. So he’s not really pushing anything right now.” 

Yoongi scoffs “Kook likes me too much? What do you mean hyung?” 

Seokjin pulls a face “Oh come on, don’t play dumb. He hangs off of your shoulders – practically idolises you, dumbass,” he looks expectantly at the younger, as if expecting everything he’s said to ring a bell. It doesn’t, and Seokjin makes a strangled noise in the back of his throat. It’s not an attractive sound. Yoongi makes sure to tell him that.

Yoongi’s relationship with Jungkook was an easy one. They had instantly clicked – throwing banter back and forth as if they’d known each other their whole lives, finding comfort and tranquility in the other person in times of stress and frustration. Jungkook knew all of Yoongi’s pet peeves and his weird habit of popping into the campus café on Wednesdays for nothing but a blueberry muffin and half an hour of people watching. Yoongi knew Jungkook’s parents almost better than his own, had seen all of Jungkook’s embarrassing but cute baby photos, knew exactly which brand of banana milk the younger boy liked to buy when he was feeling a little bit overwhelmed with the world and his life. He knew that when Jungkook was particularly homesick, he liked to curl up against a familiar person and have hands run through his hair softly until he fell asleep. Yoongi knew Jungkook’s thoughts in his darkest times and had seen the younger boy’s soul bared out before him on many nights before.

He would give Jungkook every fibre of his being – a notion that came about from a feeling that touched a little bit more deeper than the ordinary bond of hyung and dongsaeng. It felt close, and intimate. Friendship shared by something stronger than brotherhood. It felt natural. There was no ‘idolising’ or ‘hanging off of shoulders’ as Seokjin put it. Sure, Jungkook was very close and touchy-feely, but it wasn’t anything that made him feel uncomfortable. His look of confusion must have shown on his face, because Seokjin decides to elaborate. 

“Remember when you came down with a cold a month ago? You stayed in your room for the whole week and Jungkook was acting like you were going to die. Brat forced me to bring you his soup and the lamb skewers – and he wouldn’t even share it with anyone else.” 

Yoongi remembers that. He’d overworked himself and so when he came down with a cold it was almost as bad as the flu. It was a carryover bug from the winter months and he’d just unfortunately caught it. He knew what he had to do, so he had just decided to hole himself up in his room and rest. He knew that Seokjin had brought him food, he just didn’t know that it was Jungkook’s doing. 

“It was some good soup,” he croaks out and Seokjin just tuts. 

“Right. Point is, they’re only keeping mum because if Kook decides to file a harassment report against them, they’re all going to get called in and it’s all a big fuss for the kids with money and their parents. We’ve told him to file a report before, insisted really, but he’s decided not to. As I said before, you would’ve been in trouble too, so that’s why he’s been quiet this time around.”

Yoongi’s not too sure how Seokjin knows exactly everything that he does. It sometimes scares him to the extent of how thorough Seokjin is with his information finding. It really makes him a force to be reckoned with and Yoongi’s just glad he’s not really on the end of that probing. Seokjin inspects a loose thread on the sleeve of his t-shirt with mild disinterest. “Why did you get so upset with Jimin anyway? He wouldn’t tell me exactly why you left in the first place – only that you were talking about...liking someone?” 

Looks like he spoke too soon. 

But hearing the events of last night out of Seokjin’s mouth that way made him feel so childish – and Yoongi supposes he was acting a little as such. 

There’s silence in the room, and Seokjin’s phone rings. He stands up and he looks over at Yoongi. There’s the glint in his eyes again. “Look. Whatever it is, it can’t be that bad. I’m sure if you were thinking a little bit more clearly you wouldn’t have reacted that way. Don’t worry too much yeah?” 

He answers his phone with a bright tone “Hey Areum, what’s up?” 

The older male shuts the door as he leaves the room and Yoongi is left with a strange sense of being scolded. He picks up his phone and finds that he’s been left multiple messages and missed calls. He swipes through the conversations, sees that Jimin has been profusely apologising with an abundance of sad emoticons. Yoongi smiles. He replies to Jimin with a simple ‘it’s okay’. He adds on a smiley face to seem friendly, and to subtly tell Jimin that he's sorry for the way he acted. 

He’s not sure whether or not he’s surprised when Jimin replies a minute later, spouting off about how he shouldn’t have been bothering Yoongi, even if he did feel like he wasn’t wrong. He apologises again, asks if Yoongi’s taken care of himself. Yoongi affirms that yes, he’s okay and no, he’s not hungover. Yoongi can practically hear Jimin’s grousing about how lucky he is to not have a hangover when the rest of them – especially Jimin – is suffering with pounding heads and a shortage of aspirin pills from over his texts. 

They both pointedly avoid the incident with Minyoung and Yoongi is thankful – he doesn’t think he would be able to deal with the nagging inside him being picked at again by someone else. Jimin cheerfully messages that he’s heading off for a BioChem lecture, and asks Yoongi to text Kook. Yoongi asks why and Jimin tells him that he’d been a little quiet at the party after Yoongi left. 

If he thought that he could finally get away from the issue; let it die down over time – he realised that he was sorely mistaken, if the faint throbbing in his knuckles were anything to go by. Of course Yoongi would have to deal with the repercussions of his actions last night. He already knew that word would quietly get around that Min Yoongi not only used words to get his thoughts across, but his fists too. He knows that rumours would rise up because let’s be real – most university students still have the maturity of elementary school kids. 

Sure, he’s a little anxious about how the next few months are going to pan out, but it doesn’t bother him as much as the fact that Jungkook will have to deal with the after-effects of what he’s done. 

He sits there, staring at Jungkook’s contact picture. It’s from the first Halloween party he’d gone to. Somehow, he’d managed to unlock his phone and had taken the liberty of filling up Yoongi’s phone storage with countless selfies. Jungkook was dressed up as Detective Conan, with his brown hair shorter than it was now, gelled up in random places to look like the anime character. He'd stolen – sorry, borrowed – one of Seokjin’s blazers and Taehyung and Jimin had lent him a red bow tie and blue shorts. With the fake glasses and a magnifying glass in his grasp, he looked a lot like an oversized child. It was rather endearing. 

The boy really did have him wrapped around his finger. Yoongi sighs. He calls Jungkook, and waits. The call goes through to the voicemail. Yoongi realises that he had no clue as to what he was going to say to Jungkook. Sorry for fighting a homophobe? Sorry I caused you trouble? Maybe I like you? Is Jin-hyung right – when he says that you really like me? Is it like-like? Or just friend-like? 

He ends the call and instead decides to message him. He apologises for hitting Minyoung, and causing him hassle, and asks if he’s alright. After waiting for around 10 minutes, he decides that he’s doomed, and gets up to brush his teeth. Seokjin yells at him to get changed quickly, and Yoongi complies, having felt that he’d irked Seokjin enough for the day. 

It when he’s at the café that he gets a message back from Jungkook. There's a sheepish ‘srry iwas in class’ quickly followed by ‘it’s cool hyung. no worries. dont think he’ll bother me anymore lol’ 

There’s a pause. And then a peace emoji. ‘im alright. thnx for stanfing up for me. it means a lot.’ 

**standing sorry is the last thing that Jungkook messages him, and he puts his phone down when Seokjin returns with coffee. “I ordered pancakes and waffles – seeing as we’re not going to the gym today – why are you smiling like that?” Yoongi hadn’t even realised that he was smiling and he denies his claims as he schools his face. “Smile? What smile?” 

Seokjin shakes his head. “The one with your gums on display. You know, the one that makes you look disgustingly adorable?” Yoongi laughs and tells Seokjin that he’s just jealous and the older male just sniffs. “I think you’ll find that I’m the one who was modelling Balenciaga last year. I have no reason to be jealous. You're probably jealous.” Yoongi snorts “Yeah, Hoseok was so disappointed you were modelling clothes and not shoes.” The waitress comes around with their order and Yoongi frowns “How is Hoseok, by the way? I didn’t see him at the party yesterday.” Seokjin thanks the waitress and says softly “I’m not sure. I asked Joon to let me know if he gets worse. Hoseok says he doesn’t want to go back to Gonjiam, but he’s been more restless these days. Jimin’s talking to him though, so maybe he’ll listen.” The two share the waffles out between them, and a quiet settles. “Anyways, what were you smiling for?” Seokjin asks. Yoongi smiles “I apologised to Kook, and he said it’s alright.” Seokjin rolls his eyes. "I told you the brat likes you too much! He still hasn’t forgiven me for eaten the last honey chips from a few months back – and they were my chips!” They laugh easily and the rest of the conversation flows back smoothly. Yoongi feels a little better.

If someone asked, Yoongi would say that he hadn’t meant to avoid anyone, just that he was very good at procrastinating. He would point you towards the very large pile of assignments he hadn’t touched yet as evidence. It was actually said assignments that were the cause of his lack of social interaction with the rest of the world – or that’s what he tells himself. He couldn’t be blamed for staying in the university campus long enough to just attend his lectures, right? The faces Seokjin makes at him tell him that, yes, he can be blamed. But with all of that work to do, and an enthusiasm to finish everything that’s he’s never really felt before, Yoongi throws himself into his studies and pays no heed to the older boy. And Seokjin doesn’t really get the opportunity to do anything either, not when he’s swamped in his own work. But if the narrowed eyes at Yoongi are anything that he’s familiar with, he knows that Seokjin will find a way to get to talk to him properly about it. 

In all honesty, Yoongi’s pretty proud that he’s managed to hold Seokjin off for almost a week and a half. Seokjin had left a note on the bathroom mirror about a compulsory dinner, signed off with an underlying threat about Yoongi being bald should he not turn up, that Yoongi didn’t know if Seokjin was serious about carrying out. Yoongi doesn’t want to risk premature baldness à la Seokjin, so he knows that dinner that night would be with Seokjin.  

During dinner, he and Seokjin are sat in an awkward silence as the two eat the new pasta recipe that the older had decided to try out. Around half way through the meal, Seokjin puts down his cutlery purposefully and looks at Yoongi. Yoongi looks up at him, and swallows hastily. “Oh, um this is really good carbonaro hyung!” Seokjin’s cheeks heat up proudly and then he blinks rapidly “It’s pronounced car-bo-na-ra dumbass. And of course it’s good – I made it,” he begins. He fights the smile off of his face “I’m glad you like it though.” he mumbles. He seems to remember that there was a reason he’d put his fork down and looks at Yoongi again, the flush disappearing. Yoongi stares back. “Well, we got a little side-tracked – and well. How do I say this? Yoongi, you’ve got to man up.” There’s silence in the apartment. Seokjin sighs, exasperated at himself “Why is this so fucking weird?” he mutters. Yoongi finishes his car-bo-na-ra and excuses himself from the table to get a glass of water “Thought we were past this toxic masculinity in this age, hyung.” he says jokingly. Seokjin doesn’t smile. “Haha, you’re so funny Yoongi.” 

“The sarcasm says otherwise, you’re sending mixed signals hyung.” he replies as he slides his dishes into the sink. Seokjin stands from his seat, also done and calls out after Yoongi – who’s about to leave the kitchen. “Yoongi you know exactly what I meant. Stop running away from your problems all the time. You’re not doing anyone any favours, especially not yourself. And for the love of God, stop avoiding Kook? He keeps spamming my phone and though it’s nice to get messages from him for once, my phone gets enough notifications to be a vibrator.” 

Yoongi turns to Seokjin and smiles “First of all, don’t use the lord’s name in vain hyung, your parents wouldn’t be pleased, and second of all – gross.” He leaves the room. He doesn’t hate Seokjin for pointing out that he’s being dumb again. He hates himself for having soup for a stomach that churns uncomfortably at the thought of addressing his issues. Doing those assignments looked really tempting right now, but alas, he’d managed to finish all his work and he’s not desperate enough yet to go looking for more right now. 

So that night he sits cross-legged on his bed, with the duvet pulled over his head and stares at the screen of his phone. He opens the incognito window on Chrome and takes a deep breath. There’s nothing wrong with doing this, he chides to himself and taps in an entry. 

am i gay  

He feels a little stupid, a bit like a middle schooler searching for porn as a dare. He scrolls through the results, follows through with a few links. Most of them are internet trolls, references to memes, with few actually helpful results. So he tries making it more direct. 

am i a homosexual?  

There’s not much difference. And Yoongi’s dinner roils sickly in his gut. There are entire blogs dedicated to ranting about how vile the idea of men lying with men and women lying with women was. He doesn’t really process just how much people could hate someone who isn’t even bothering their lives. It felt so surreal looking at this.

how do i know that i am gay?  

This time, there’s a few links to an English web portal for a forum where there a few people discussing their sexuality. He reads about pansexuals, skims over a debate about half-sexuals (or is it demi-sexuals? – his ability to translate from English back to Korean was a little rusty) and finds out that there are people who identify as aromantic. He has more trouble getting his head around that concept, manages it in the end but he doesn’t actually get any information that he needs. 

Yoongi flops back, head aiming for the pillow, but hitting it on the headboard instead. He curses and hears Seokjin ask if he’s okay. Yells back a muffled yes and whines pathetically into his sheets. He falls asleep like that. In these unrefined moments where he lacks any semblance of grace and the air of an adult, it’s easy for him to forget that he’s not a prepubescent teen but a supposedly functioning twenty-something year old instead. 

Yoongi is studying in his little corner in the library a few days later when he sees Jungkook slide into a seat opposite him. “Hey hyung!” he says brightly. Yoongi shoots him a smile and Jungkook pulls out his laptop and a textbook, all while humming a little tune under his breath. His voice was airy and soft. Gentle and soothing with a delicate quality to it. Now, Yoongi wasn’t a music major or anything, that was probably something in another lifetime for him, but he knew when someone could sing well. He wonders why Jungkook decided to be a psychology undergrad student when he could have done really well in the music department. Yoongi stares at him for a second, and then realises that Jungkook might have the answers he needs – the younger boy did say that he identified as gay, after all. He pauses; was it considered bad etiquette to ask someone to explain their sexuality? Especially if you’ve been avoiding said person, unintentionally or not. He shakes his head a little and asks quietly “Hey Kook-ah, you busy?” 

Jungkook snaps his head up to look at Yoongi with wide, sparkling eyes. Cute. Jungkook smiles and shakes his head. “I always have time for you hyung!” Yoongi swallows the bad feelings in his throat. Fuck, I’m a bad person, how can I have avoided Jungkook for so long? He berates himself for a measly few seconds and voices his question before he can chicken out. “Jungkook-ah, how did you know you were gay?” Jungkook blinks, and his face is blank. Yoongi panics inside. Oh shit, mission abort mission abort! “U-uh, you don’t have to answer that if you’re uncomfortable with it.” he adds hastily, but it feels like the damage is done; Jungkook won’t look up at him, instead choosing to focus on the table. The younger boy bites his lip thoughtfully and then looks at Yoongi. “I guess I just knew that there was something a little funny about me, you know. It's not an every day occurrence to find out that you’re crushing on Rain when all the other guys in your class are obsessed with SNSD. Not that there’s anything wrong with them!” Jungkook rubs his neck sheepishly as he looks at Yoongi. Yoongi remains silent because he wants to let Jungkook speak; needs to let Jungkook speak. 

“I knew I was gay because all I could really ever imagine is wanting to be with another guy. Like how most of the guys in our class have ideal types – they imagine dating a girl with fair skin and a cute demeanour like Jieun-noona or someone as pretty as Park Shin Hye. They’ll be able to see themselves hugging, kissing...making love or whatever, with another girl.” Jungkook blushes a little “I’m just like that, except I don’t see a girl by my side. My heart beats embarrassingly fast when I see another man who looks handsome, I want to hold hands and be loved by them. I can one hundred percent appreciate a girl who’s incredibly beautiful and funny, or a woman who is sensual and flirtatious. It’s just that I’m not affected by it in the same way as a lot of the guys around here are.” Yoongi nods. Jungkook seems to hesitate when he speaks next. “I like people who know me well, who are willing to understand me. I want to be by the side of a person who will appreciate me for me, someone who will let me love them with all my heart in a way that mirrors them.” 

There’s a pensive silence between the two of them. It’s not heavy or awkward at all. Yoongi smiles at Jungkook. “Thank you, Jungkook-ah.” He wants to say more, explain that he did understand. That his heart is sated and he feels a little more at peace. It's all he’s been looking for in the past few days. Jungkook seemed to receive Yoongi’s unsaid words nonetheless because he softly whispers “I just want to be loved.” 

They work in a comfortable silence after that. Each of them focus on their own section of work, not bothering each other unless it’s to borrow something. Yoongi decides to man up, in Seokjin’s eloquent words, because the silence is a little too empty for his liking. 

“I’m sorry for avoiding you, Kook. It’s just that I...I don’t know. I think that maybe –” 

“Are you really sorry?” Jungkook interjects. His eyes glimmer with curiosity. And Yoongi nods. But Jungkook pouts. As if he doesn’t believe him “How do I know that you’re really sorry? How do I know that you won’t avoid me anymore?” Yoongi opens his mouth, and closes it. He’s not sure. But Jungkook looks kind of sad, bottom lip jutting out slightly. He looks almost petulant. 

“Anything! You can do anything. Whatever you want, and I’ll do it. I’m sorry Kook, I really am.” he blurts out. Jungkook’s eyes widen some more – is that even possible? – and a coy smile makes an appearance “Hmmm, sounds like punishment. That’s kind of kinky hyung – didn't think you were that kind of person...” Jungkook laughs at Yoongi’s bug-eyed expression and waves a hand, and stifles his giggles when he realises he’s in a library. “I was just kidding, just kidding! But if you’re really sorry, you’ll...dye your hair! Yeah, I’ve never seen you with dyed hair before, and maybe it’ll make it easier for us to spot you if you do ever try to run away from anyone again.” he grins, and Yoongi’s heart drops again. He’s adorable and it’s a fucking curse, Yoongi silently bemoans. 

“So we’ll meet at mine and Tae’s apartment? I’ll tell Tae-hyung to get the stuff ready then! See you in half an hour hyung!” 

When Jungkook leaves, it’s with a smile that does not question anything. And after the younger boy is gone, Yoongi sits there and stares at his molecular biology chapter until the words swim into one blurry wiggle. So Yoongi is gay. He knows that now; Jungkook has definitely cleared that query up for him. But somewhere inside him that word makes a little bug start to crawl under his skin. There’s nothing wrong with liking men, he reasons with himself. There’s nothing wrong with liking guys but Minyoung flashes in his mind. Those hate posts from a week ago that he had read. His parents and his peers. They all loom over him like a giant guillotine waiting for him to make a move. He doesn’t like it at all. It freaks him out; and he doesn’t make good decisions when he’s freaked out. 

He makes his mind up to talk to Seokjin about this development. It's all very weird, going to his friend for advice to date. Maybe it’s because he’s new to the whole dating some he’s been friends with thing. He knows Seokjin has a girlfriend, is in a very serious relationship with her too. He’d known her from high school apparently. Oh well, he can talk to him later. But first, hair dye. He gets up and leaves for Jungkook’s and Taehyung’s apartment. He can already smell the bleach and he wonders why all his friends have some weird obsession with hair dye. Was early balding really that attractive?

Taehyung greets him with black gloves when he opens the door and already, Yoongi knows that they aren’t going to let him off with something simple. Jungkook peeks over his shoulder and grins evilly. “We went ahead and chose a colour for you, I hope you don’t mind hyung.” Jungkook says. There's a challenge in his eyes, as if he’s daring Yoongi to say something, and Yoongi feels oddly threatened as he steps inside. The door seems to close behind him a little menacingly, and he feels trapped. He’s not sure what exactly happens, but he’s led into a chair in their bathroom while Taehyung preps all of the stuff. “You’ll be here for a few hours, so I hope you’re not busy hyung.” Taehyung says cheerfully and Yoongi eyes the brush in his gloved hand. “Don’t worry hyung, you’re in good hands. I dyed Jimin’s hair too.” he continues, as if he knew that Yoongi was sceptical. “Do I get to see?” he asks weakly, and the two of them shake their head in unison. 

So Yoongi resigns himself and settles down in the chair. Taehyung drapes a plastic sheet over Yoongi and gets down to work immediately. Yoongi feels his head being covered from the back and the tickling sensation where the brush pokes at his head isn't as bad as he had originally thought. He doesn’t see much, and Taehyung chatters aimlessly with Jungkook, who invites Yoongi into join too. 

The time in between the conversations gives Yoongi a lot of time to think. He wonders how likely it is that Jungkook likes him back the way he does. It's dumb to assume that Jungkook likes him, just because he too likes guys, but Yoongi hopes that when Jungkook was speaking earlier, he was hinting at Yoongi. He then wants to kick himself because he's being forward, isn’t he? Jungkook has plenty of friends, he probably likes one of them better than he does Yoongi. He’s sure that Taehyung is most likely to be judging him as he grumbles with a plastic bag over his head – he looks a right sight anyway. 

He lets Taehyung wash his hair free of the bleach, doesn’t complain when he has to bend in all sorts of weird and uncomfortable angles and then lets him repeat the process a second time, which takes a considerably shorter amount of time. Taehyung washes his hair again and applies what he thinks is called a toner. “Wow, hyung you look good blond!” Yoongi looks at Jungkook for an opinion and finds that Jungkook is already staring at him, lips between his teeth. “Kook? What do you think?” Yoongi prompts, and Jungkook startles with a gasp “Um yes! Hyung looks good! Very good!” Taehyung giggles and nudges at Yoongi’s scalp. “Do you really want to dye hyung’s hair even more? I think it’s good enough if he’s just blond.” Jungkook looks torn for a second and pouts. “Well, it’s up to you, hyung.” he says. Yoongi looks at his phone and realises that he’d been sat in the chair for nearly two hours. He sighs “Well I did say that I’d do anything, didn’t I? I’m already blond anyway, and if it’s not done, I’m willing to sit through it all.” And just as he’s got the words out of his mouth, he’s regretting them; his poor hair is going to be so damaged. But he’s not going to say anything when Taehyung’s already started mixing the colour into a bowl behind him. And because he's not allowed to look at Taehyung with the dye, he chooses to stare at Jungkook instead. 

The youngest is dangling off of the side of the bathtub, kicking his legs out as he scrolls through his phone. He’s humming the tune to another song and Taehyung joins him, his deep voice echoing smoothly to the background sound of a running tap and the rhythmic tapping of the brush as it hits the bowl of dye. It’s a nice atmosphere and the two of their voices weave in well with each other. “Say goodbye to blond Yoongi-hyung, Kook.” Tae jokes and Jungkook looks up at Yoongi intensely. Yoongi’s eyes move to look at everything except Jungkook, and he tries not to squirm under the heavy gaze. He’s saved by Taehyung, who tells him to lean his head forward, and he lets the feeling of the brush against his head carry his thoughts away again. 

He’s sat with the dye in hair for the final time when the door to Taehyung’s apartment open. “I’m coming in and reclaiming my headphones Jungkook!” calls a familiar voice. Yoongi blanches. The three of them hear footsteps in the house and Taehyung replies “We’re in the bathroom hyung,” The footsteps stop and then there’s a grumbling “You better not be doing anything weird...why does it smell like bl- oh hello hyung?” 

Yoongi offers a deadpan “Hello Namjoon.” 

Namjoon looks a little perplexed, but chooses not to comment. “That’s a nice shade hyung. It looks....it suits your fair skin?” he says. Taehyung snorts. Jungkook leaps up and bounds over to usher Namjoon out. “Headphones, right? I’ve got them in my room.” The two return and Namjoon smiles mischievously. “Do you mind if I take a picture? For memories sake? Also to show Hobi – it should cheer him up right away.” He whips his phone out and Yoongi begins “Don’t you fucking da-” 

Click 

Yoongi clamps his mouth shut and Namjoon turns the phone to show him but Jungkook beats him to it. “He’s not allowed to see, Joonie-hyung!” and Namjoon oh’s. 

“Delete that right now Kim Namjoon!” 

Namjoon snorts and raises an eyebrow at Yoongi “Or what hyung? Are you gonna poke my knees or something?” Yoongi splutters indignantly. The disrespect from everyone he’s had to deal with today is really something else. “For a law student, you talk way too much shit Joon – you know I can beat your ass,” Yoongi says, rising but Taehyung sits him back down with words of not being able to afford getting bleach all over his apartment. So he’s not sure how effective that threat is when he’s confined to his chair with his hair plastered to his scalp in some outlandish colour. Namjoon laughs good-naturedly and waves a goodbye. “Well too bad you can’t test your theory out right now, I’ve gotta get back to Hobi. See you all!” and with that he steps out of the apartment. 

Taehyung tells Yoongi to close his eyes and he washes the colour out of Yoongi’s scalp. Once he’s towel dried his hair, Jungkook throws a beanie at him. “You’ve gotta wear this until you get home, hyung.” Yoongi looks at it like it’s offended him. And in all honesty it has; considering the fact that it’s bright pink “You’re telling me that Seokjin gets to see my hair before I do?” but Jungkook doesn’t say anything, he just shrugs. 

Yoongi scrunches his nose in dissent but pulls the beanie low over his head. Jungkook laughs and Yoongi offers to help clean up. Taehyung waves him off and Jungkook leads him to the door. It’s dark outside and Jungkook hovers at the door frame. He looks a little nervous for some reason. 

“Thanks for doing this hyung.” Jungkook says softly, eyes sparkling in the dim light. Yoongi shrugs. “Anything for you,” he says. He bites his lips “Besides, I did tell you that I was sorry. Here’s your proof.” Jungkook beams. His front teeth make him look like a bunny when he smiles like that, Yoongi realises. He wonders why he never saw it before. 

“I think it looks really nice on you hyung. It suits you.” He reaches forward to tuck a few stray locks of hair underneath the beanie, and his fingers linger on Yoongi’s cheeks. He smiles almost fondly at Yoongi, then seems to realise what he’s doing. “Sorry.” he says quickly, snatching his hands back. Yoongi pretends that he doesn’t miss the warmth of Jungkook’s fingers on his face. “It’s alright, nothing to apologise for.” he says quietly. Jungkook’s eyes widen and he’s about to say something when he hears Taehyung yell at him to help him clear up. “Looks like you’ve got to go,” Yoongi says with a smile. Jungkook flushes pink and waves him goodbye. “Bye hyung.” he says. Yoongi nods. 

Yoongi walks home thinking about Jungkook’s smile, and reels back his memories to the first time he’s met him, and thinks about all the time Jungkook has laughed or grinned, and sure enough, all he can see is the precious little bunny-like beam. And Yoongi just knows that he’s absolutely taken with the younger boy. 

He’s just gotten home when he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket. He pulls the beanie off and unlocks his phone to see a message from Hoseok. ‘I LOVE the hair hyung XD. touched that you decide to lose your hair dye virginity with my favourite colour <3 ’

Yoongi frowns. Hoseok’s favourite colour? His eyes widen. That means his hair is dyed a shade of a – 

“Green?” Yoongi snaps over to Seokjin and immediately points his finger at him. 

“Don’t even think about laughing.” Yoongi strides over to the nearest mirror and inspects his hair. 

Okay. It’s not as bad as he thought. It was a soft shade of mint, with undertones of a darker green and it looked sort of nice all messy. Seokjin follows him into the living room. “Looks like Taehyung did a good job again. You look cute.” Yoongi glares at him half-heartedly. “I have to go to work like this, Jin-hyung.” he says with a petulant whine. Seokjin chuckles “That you do.” Seokjin claps a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder “I was going to be mad that you were late, but this makes up for it. I managed to catch up with Areum again in that time too, so I guess you deserve a thank you for that.” 

Oh yes. He’d told himself that he was going to talk to Seokjin. He steels himself and turns to Seokjin. Perhaps it’s the fact that the situation couldn’t be any worse, or maybe his new hair colour is giving him some newfound strength. Whatever it is, he’s just going to go for it. 

“Hyung-nim,” he begins. Seokjin whips his head over to Yoongi sharply “What do you want.” he says slowly, with his eyes narrowed. Yoongi blinks owlishly.

“What do you mean?” he asks innocently. Seokjin doesn’t fall for it. “You only call me hyung-nim when you want something. So allow me to reiterate. What do you want?” Yoongi pouts. “Can we talk this over with dinner?” he asks. He needs to find an excuse to stall if and when Seokjin tries to pry too much, and shovelling food into his mouth provides for excellent stalling material. Seokjin raises an eyebrow, and crosses his arms. And wow, he really reminds Yoongi of his mother. “Do I look like I run a catering service Yoongi? It’s your turn to cook you fucking garden pea.” Yoongi looks at Seokjin quizzically. “Garden pea?” he echoes. Seokjin thinks for a second “It’s not too bad for a nickname made in the moment, right? You’re small and cute and green, ergo, garden pea.” 

Yoongi groans. Looks like he’s going to have to deal with an influx of green-related puns now from Seokjin now. And he forgot to cook dinner. Fantastic. “We can order jajangmyeon and fried chicken if you want.” 

Seokjin pretends to consider. “My skin will break out if I eat greasy food, Yoongi-ah. You know that.” Yoongi doesn’t mention that everyone’s skin breaks out when they eat too much greasy food and instead says “I’ll pay for it all.” He really wants Seokjin’s advice, but he doesn’t want to seem to desperate, so he’ll play along with Seokjin’s game and hopefully fly under his suspicion radar. Seokjin nods and calls the nearest delivery. Yoongi lets out a breath of relief. 

They meander over to the living room and both fall onto the couch. Seokjin picks up the TV remote and he turns the channel to a Laws of the Jungle re-run. “I wonder what it’s like to be on the show.” he says to no-one in particular. Yoongi looks at him in surprise. “You’re not going to ask me anything?” 

Seokjin looks over lazily “Do you want me to?” Yoongi shakes his head vigorously. “Just thought that you’d want to wait ‘til the food arrived; you did ask to speak over food in the first place. And since you came to me first, I figured that I should honour your wishes. Don’t mind me, I’m just filling in for a conversation.” 

Yoongi smiles and Seokjin makes a wheezing noise “Don’t smile, you look like one of Iseul’s dolls. I can’t take you seriously anymore.” And Yoongi laughs. “Who’s Iseul? Areum’s younger sister?” Seokjin nods. Yoongi asks how their relationship is going and Seokjin smiles. “I’m going to give her a promise ring on our next anniversary because I’m a poor med student.” Yoongi’s eyes widen. “Woah. You really love her don’t you.” Seokjin nods and says quietly “Je t’aime plus qu'hier, mais moins que demain. It means ‘I love you more than yesterday, but less than tomorrow’. Doesn’t that sound beautiful?” And Yoongi thinks that this is the first time that he’s ever seen Seokjin so off guard. It's obvious that he deeply cared for his girlfriend and now Yoongi’s all the more convinced that Seokjin is the right person to go to for advice. 

The older male pulls himself out of his dreamy state and smiles at Yoongi. “But enough about that. I doubt you want to know about me and Areum.” Yoongi pouts and makes up his mind to ask about Areum and Seokjin a lot more. And to interact with her when she comes over next time. 

“How’s the medical student life treating you right now?” 

“The course is kicking my ass.” 

“What about your acting classes?” 

“Not too worried about those at the moment. I have an audition for a sports drama. I’m gonna try for the lead or the second lead – they're both swimmers. My shoulders will definitely help for the role, but I’m gonna have to work out my back muscles and also take up some swimming classes, so I’m not too sure if I want to. It’s a lot of time and effort to invest in for something I might not even be successful in. They'd also probably just want an already popular lead too, and not some newbie who’s only been an extra before.” 

Yoongi nudges at the older boy reproachfully “Oh come on. You don’t know that you won’t make it. They’d better hire you, if not just for your shoulders alone man. And besides, the worst that can happen is you not getting the role. You’ll be good at swimming and you’ll have a nice body to parade around for Areum to admire.” 

“Yah! Areum loves me for more than just my body you know.” Yoongi snorts unattractively. “Yeah, I noticed. She’s stuck around with you for so long.” 

Seokjin pretends to punch his shoulder and the bell rings. “That’ll be the food.” he says. Yoongi gets up to pay and when he opens the door, he sees a face he had hoped to never see again. 

“Two jajangmyeon, two fried chicken and two naengmyeon with a side of oi muchim, and a 2 litre bottle of Cola for Kim Seokji– o-oh.” 

Yoongi ignores them and gasps at the order “Naengmyeon and oi muchim? Did the bastard order more food? Does he think I’m made out of money or something?” After he pats his pockets to pay for the food, he pulls out his wallet. “Do you accept card?” he asks gruffly. The boy shakes his head “S-sorry s-sir. The card reader is broken today so it’s only cash right now.” Yoongi makes a face. “How much is it?” He asks indifferently, as he shuffles through the notes he has in his wallet. “52,800 won sir.” 

Yoongi looks up. There's no longer any physical evidence of their fight on Minyoung’s face, but the fear left behind is certainly apparent. Yoongi isn’t sure if he’s happy or bitter about it. “Don’t call me sir. It’s weird, you’re only a few years younger than me.” he mutters and pulls out the amount needed for him. He silently hands him the money and takes the food from his arms. Seokjin better fucking eat all of this. 

Minyoung is just leaving when Yoongi calls him back. “Hey, kid.” 

“Yes?” 

“Don’t ever bother Jungkook – or anyone, for that matter – again. Or there will be consequences.” 

Minyoung’s face doesn’t give away any emotion but once more, his fear seems to rear up inside of him because he nods wildly before making his way down again. 

Yoongi grumbles as he kicks the door closed and yells “Hyung, why did you order more fucking food? I thought you said you would break out?” and Seokjin simply smiles at him as he helps Yoongi carry the noodles and chicken. “Yes, but that was before I found out you were paying. It's easier to indulge yourself when you have a wonderful roommate paying for your favourite cold glass noodles.” Yoongi glares once more, but doesn’t comment. 

They’re sat on the couch again, with the take-away all laid out on the table and as Seokjin begin piling his plate with chicken and noodles and pickled radishes, Yoongi begins. 

“So...I like someone,” he says carefully, avoiding the frozen Seokjin as he pulls some jajangmyeon into his own plate. Seokjin nods slowly. “You’ve finally managed to establish that?” he asks jokingly. Yoongi looks at him in exasperation and Seokjin lifts his hands in surrender “Okay I get it. I’ll shut up until you’re done. Can’t believe that you don’t want my excellent commentary though.” he tuts and proceeds with his food. Yoongi rolls his eyes at the dramatics and continues “I like this person, but I’m afraid that everyone will disapprove. I don’t want that.” 

Seokjin stuffs more radish into his mouth and answers without missing a beat “I say fuck whatever they have to say and go for it.” 

Yoongi looks at him in alarm. “Surely you don’t mean that?” he asks. Seokjin hadn’t even taken a second to think about what Yoongi had said and the last thing Yoongi wanted was to royally mess everything up. But Seokjin just nods “Yes I do. As soon as you mentioned approval, I knew exactly what my answer was going to be. 

You don’t need the approval of others to give yourself to someone you love. If you really do like them as you say you do, it shouldn’t matter what others think, because it’s a bond between the two of you and not anyone else.” 

Yoongi feels his brows furrow. Sure, it makes sense, but still it doesn’t feel right. “It’s not as simple as that, hyung.” and he looks down to poke at his food with his chopsticks. He hadn’t expected the older boy to be more abrupt, and the direct approach he had taken was now going at a faster pace than he wants. At least I'm getting a little more clarity in my mind, he supposes. 

Seokjin raises an eyebrow sceptically “Really? If you’re worried about your parents cutting you off in terms of financing, you shouldn’t be – considering the fact that you pay for everything yourself. And I don’t see any reason for your parents being the cause of concern anyway – they're been nothing but supporting in all the time that I’ve known them.” 

Yoongi knows that he’s right; his parents are good people, always having been there for him during his rough time in high school, always having put up with the shit that he went through. They also love Jungkook to bits, so there would never have been any negative response from them, if that was his issue. 

The older boy picks up some chicken. “None of us would ever disapprove of the person you choose to be with – unless it’s some really old guy like Professor Bang or someone my grandmother’s age– that's when we’ll have problems, you know. In layman's terms, you can rule us out of your list of disapproving characters.” Yoongi nods pensively. Once again, Seokjin is right. 

He doesn’t say anything and just quietly reaches for some chicken. Seokjin hands him the bucket and says out loud “I don’t think it’s disapproval that’s holding you back, Yoongi. I just think you’re scared.” 

Yoongi freezes. Him, scared? That sounds...plausible, if he thinks about it rationally. He nods, and lets Seokjin talk. It gives him time to mull everything over in his head anyway. 

“You did come to me, and I’m assuming that it’s for my opinion, so correct me if I’m wrong, okay?” 

Yoongi says nothing, so Seokjin ploughs on, a little more hesitantly now that Yoongi's gone wordless. “Personally I think you should just go for it. If you’ve taken an interest in someone, they’re bound to be sterling. If you do end up feeling like you’ve taken a wrong term, it’s okay. Everyone is allowed to make a mistake – and we’ll all be here for you. Me, Hobi, Joon-ah, Jimin, Tae and Jungkook – we're all you’re friends. And we’ll be there for you. 

Don’t let fear or the opinions of others stop you from reaching out for who you love okay? I know you think it’s probably easier said than done, with me sitting here and preaching to you. But honestly, go for it Yoongi,” Seokjin leans back, and his eyes glint knowingly. “I think you have a decent shot.” 

Yoongi pulls on his freshly dyed hair. It's soft and strangely comforting. “I need your opinion too, little man.” Seokjin jibes and Yoongi finally reacts with a pout “Hey – I can take the green puns, but you’re pushing it with the jokes about the height.” Seokjin laughs, and almost chokes and smiles at him. Yoongi takes a deep breath. 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to ruin a friendship with your shady advice.” he mumbles and Seokjin puts his hands on his chest in fake hurt “My advice is not shady, thank you very much. When have I ever led you astray?” 

Yoongi can’t help but laugh with Seokjin and there's a lull in the atmosphere.

“Thank you hyung.” he says genuinely. Seokjin scrambles to reach Yoongi’s hands and then says in a hushed voice “Could you say that again – I don’t think I hear you right? Please. I want to record it on my phone.” And Yoongi tells Seokjin to fuck off. Seokjin pouts and moves back, all while mumbling ‘it was worth a shot.’

Yoongi sends Jungkook a message the next morning, and asks if he wants to meet out sometime that week. He chucks his phone on the floor and prays for the world to swallow him and forever erase his existence. It’s 110% melodramatic and he faintly thinks that Seokjin’s finally rubbed off on him, four years after knowing the older guy. His phone pings from the floor, and he dives for it at the same time Seokjin walks into the room. Seokjin smirks and pretends that Yoongi had not just leapt across the room to answer a message. “Popping in to remind you to do your laundry before two today because the water’s going off for an hour for maintenance work, little tree frog.” 

“Yeah, sure, whatever.” Yoongi says distractedly, letting the nickname go. Seokjin says something about being totally whipped as he leaves the room, but Yoongi just focuses on the message. The simple ‘id love to!’ means the whole world to him. ‘im a little tight this week though’ brings the dizzying happiness down a little but the next text that follows shoots him right back up again ‘i think that i can make some time on thursday if that’s okay?’ 

Yoongi’s perfectly fine for Thursday, so he texts Jungkook to meet him at the lamb skewer place by half six. He almost tells him to dress nicely, but holds himself back; it’s just the lamb skewer place, after all. 

‘see you there on thursday hyung!’ Jungkook texts in lieu of a goodbye and Yoongi snorts. Of course he’d see him, his hair was fucking green. 

Thursday was three days away, and never had Yoongi anticipated for 80 hours to pass by so quickly. He picks out his clothes, and repicks out his clothes on Tuesday evening. He evens considers asking for Seokjin’s opinion, but he knows that that’s going a little too far. He's so unbelievably nervous, but the giddying elation that also swells inside him is enough to keep him sated, and sane – for now, at least. 

He doesn’t see much of Jungkook during the week, but meets with Hoseok on Tuesday instead, having not caught up with the economics major in a long while. He suffers the onslaught of cooing and oohing for about half an hour before Hoseok tires. They sit together in his apartment with Namjoon, and help him crunch numbers lazily. 

Hoseok asks Yoongi if he should take up dance. Yoongi says sure why not. Hoseok then tries to convince him to also join aforementioned dance lessons, and Yoongi struggles to pull himself out of that one. Namjoon comes to his rescue though and sacrifices Jimin for him instead, and Hoseok leaves him alone about it. The quiet air around them makes Yoongi realise that he had work of his own to do, so he bids them goodbye and heads home. He checks the time on his phone and thinks to himself, 52 hours. 

Wednesday is uneventful in the morning with nothing but lectures and he gets ready for his part-time job as a bar tender in the evening. Seokjin titters from the doorway while Yoongi tries to make his bright hair less noticeable. It was safe to say that Yoongi’s shift was full of people coming up to make comments about his new colour, and the reasoning behind its choice. At least most of them were compliments. 

In the evening, close to midnight, Hoseok calls him. Yoongi answers and is met with the sounds of the clink of a can. “Seok-ah, are you drinking again? I thought we’d talked about this.” 

There’s some shuffling and a groan “It’s not much – honestly, hyung. It’s just me and my beer, and some sprite if I feel like I want some bubbles. Jimin and Joonie won’t buy anymore alcohol and bring it into the house, and I can’t be asked to go down to the convenience store. So there’s not much fizz unless Jimin wants wine.” Hoseok rasps. 

Yoongi sighs “Whatever, don’t drink yourself silly, dumbass. Why’d you call in the first place? I doubt it’s because you want to hear me nag you.” Hoseok giggles from the other side and says “I’m going back to Gonjiam in a few weeks.” Yoongi doesn’t need to see the younger boy to know that his lips are trembling, the unnatural pitch in his voice and the strain where he tries to sound happy is enough. There's a difference in Hoseok’s voice; it sounds empty. It makes Yoongi sad that he can’t do enough to make that emptiness go away. “Hey, Seok-ah,” he says softly “It’s not that bad.” He hears him sniffle “I’m going to throw a going away party. You're invited.” Hysteria is already bleeding into Hoseok’s voice, and Yoongi knows just how volatile the following conversation could end up being. He chooses to tread lightly. 

“Is that really necessary, Hoseok? It's only a check-up.” 

“I won’t be seeing you for a long time though.” 

“Think about the money you’re going to have to spend. It all goes towards a spiral of debt you know,” Yoongi tries to reason. “And does Jimin know?” 

Hoseok huffs “Jimin’s not the boss of me, hyung!” he says sullenly. “Anyway – what’s university life without a little bit of party and debt?” he fires back. 

“A much better one.” Yoongi says blandly. Hoseok whines from the other end of the call, and he wonders if Namjoon is in their apartment right now. 

“Debt from fun is a lot better than debt from medical bills though,” he hears him mutter darkly. The self-depreciation that writhes in his voice is so clearly tangible over the phone connection, and Yoongi can taste its bitterness on his own tongue. He feels himself wanting to pull the younger boy out of that darkness, and wishes, not for the first time, that he could reach through the line to do so. 

“It’s to help you feel better. I know you know that Seok-ah.” Yoongi remedies. He prepares himself to stand his ground if needs be, because Hoseok isn’t with him now, and the younger boy is starting to get upset. “Hobi knows it’s to get better hyung, he does. But that doesn’t make it any better does it? Hobi is wasting his life away, pumping his system with anything and everything that makes him feel normal – but Hobi’s not supposed to do that. Not everyone needs what Hobi does to feel normal, it’s so frustrating. He craves the attention of everyone, but he hates it at the same time. He worries because he doesn’t want anyone to leave, and feels like they all will in the end – even if they don’t. Sometimes, Hobi even wishes that they would; at least that way he won’t have to be paranoid about it all the time. Yoongi-hyung, Hobi don’t feel alright because he wastes away his youth being reliant on medication and counselling because his brain is all one big wrongly wired fucked piece of shit. He doesn’t like it. Life is fleeting, it’s so very, very short. Hobi can’t waste it.” 

Springs creak in the background and more bottles clink as Hoseok lets free a long moan. “What are you doing, Hoseok-ah?” Yoongi asks tiredly. Hoseok mumbles incoherently and then says “Grasping my youth.” 

It’s quiet on both ends of the phone line save for the sound of heavy gulping. The imagery that comes to Yoongi is strangely phallic and he shakes his head to rid himself of the thoughts. Hoseok is just chugging his alcohol, Yoongi what the fuck? he questions himself. 

“Hyung,” Hoseok says abruptly, voice sounding slightly warbled. “You should grasp your youth too.” Hoseok what the hell, you’re not making it any better! 

“I’m not grasping fucking anything, weirdo,” Yoongi retorts. He pats at his red cheeks and is suddenly extremely glad that Hoseok was not in front of him in that moment. “Hobi is being serious, don’t let anything hold you back. Go get your youth Yoongo-hyunggg!” he yells into the phone. Yoongi stares back at his device, and wonders if Hoseok knows that his words had two meanings in that moment. Probably not. The younger male is referring to himself in third person, which only indicates to Yoongi that he’s way too far gone. 

Hoseok makes a startled noise and Yoongi hears the door open and a shout of “Hobi-hyung! Oh god, how much did you drink?”  

“Hobi only had one can of sprite, Jiminnie~” Hoseok coos. There’s the quick footfalls of Jimin’s feet and he talks into Hoseok’s phone “Thank you for talking to him hyung, I’ve gotta go now–” 

“Jimin-ah I love you!” Hoseok yells from the background. Jimin makes a choked noise and hastily responds “Yes, I love you too – now let’s get this mess thrown out, yeah?” The phone hangs soon after. 

Yoongi sighs. At least tomorrow was Thursday. 

Calling himself a ball of nerves would be an understating description of Yoongi’s emotional state on Thursday. He could hardly focus on the microbiology presentation, and his normally steady hands were shaking slightly while demonstrating to the class. When it came around to tutoring, he was just waiting for the one hour to just be over. He rushes back to the apartment and quickly showers, yelping when the water that hits his body is cold first. Once he’s changed, he tries to tame his hair with a little bit of gel, but he gives up after many fruitless attempts and lets the green cloud on his head just stay messy. He grabs his wallet and speed walks down to the lamb skewer joint. 

Hwayi Grill was a peculiar restaurant, in the sense that it sold a mixture of Korean and American food together. It was a favourite hangout spot for Yoongi and Jungkook, because not only could they could both fawn over the incredible grilled meat but Jungkook could also get a taste of home when being away from the States really took a toll on him. 

When he arrives, the place isn’t packed but it’s busier than he would have liked. He makes his way down to an empty spot at the end of a long table, because nowhere else was free, after greeting the owner with a small nod. 

“Is it a trend for the young folk to colour their hair in such particular fashion, Yoongi-ah?” he calls out. Yoongi ducks his head, embarrassed and responds with a laugh “Blame Jungkook for this one, Mr. Lee.” 

He checks his phone once he’s sat down. It’s 18:38 and there are no messages. Jungkook was usually early whenever they met up together; always got in earlier so he could order quicker and have less time to wait for the food to arrive. His leg bounces nervously. 

A waitress comes over to take his order and Yoongi’s stomach tugs a little worriedly when she peers at his minty green hair. He smiles weakly “Could you just pass down a regular for Min Yoongi to Mr. Lee, please? He’ll know what it means.” he says. The waitress hums and disappears again. 

Yoongi peers at the entrance, hoping for Jungkook to magically appear, and when he doesn’t show, he takes to checking his phone again. 18:57. He’s late. 

Yoongi begins to wonder if Jungkook didn’t want to show up after all, but quickly tamps the idea down; Jungkook would have the decency to at least let Yoongi know that he wasn’t going to turn up. 

By 19:02, Yoongi contemplates asking Mr. Lee to just parcel the grilled food up as a takeaway, all hopes of the younger boy showing his face waning like the setting sun, when the man of the hour bursts in, out of breath and a little sweaty. He spots Yoongi and begins to rapidly blurt out his reasons for being late. Yoongi just gapes. “I’m so sorry hyung! I was babysitting this afternoon, but I couldn’t leave because the mother wasn’t able to arrive in time because of the traffic outside so I ended up leaving late, and then when I got home to the apartment I saw the time and I tried to take the car but it wouldn’t start so I had to run all the way here and I didn’t even get time to change a-and...is there something wrong?” 

Jungkook is wearing a black hoodie underneath a pair of oversized denim overalls and his hair lies floppy and close to his head, with the front slightly sticking to his forehead. Yoongi feels very underdressed in his normal jeans and simple black and white flannel shirt. It's a dumb thought, but the fact that Jungkook manages to look really handsome in something so casual makes a little bit of jealousy trickle through his veins. The younger boy follows Yoongi’s gaze “I look horrible, don’t I? It’s just that these are comfortable clothes and the children I babysit are really playful and energetic and yeah, I didn’t get time to change and I’m also kind of sweaty and gross. Sorry.” He wipes his forehead free of the incriminating moisture. Yoongi imagines Jungkook playing with kids, and the thought set a field of tickly butterflies loose in his stomach. He squeaks out a “No, you look fine!” that is entirely unconvincing, if the pout on Jungkook’s face is telling. 

Jungkook sits down and just then, the waitress brings in Yoongi’s order. She places the food in front of Jungkook, whose eyes are sparkling even more brightly and the young lady stops to take in the wide eyes. Her cheeks pink and Yoongi feels a horrible urge to tell her to stop staring. He coughs instead and pretends to have a sore throat “Excuse me, could I have a glass of water?” 

The waitress startles and nods as she shuffles hurriedly away. Yoongi does not stare after her with a smug sense of satisfaction, he does not, he does not. That would be mean of him. He keeps his eyes on Jungkook, who looks at him with concern “You okay? If you weren’t well you shouldn’t have come down today! We could have rescheduled – wait...were you waiting a long time?” 

Yoongi quickly tries not to blow his cover. “Oh um, no. Not really a long time. And it’s okay – I mean, I’m okay – I think my throat was sore from the presentation I was doing today.” He tries to avoid Kook’s eyes subtly and internally thanks the waitress for her impeccable timing when she arrives with his glass of water. Thing is, he wasn’t the one speaking in the presentation, but a white lie never hurt anyone, right?  

Jungkook looks at Yoongi carefully, and amusement dances in his eyes “Ah. I see,” he says slowly, as if he understood something greater. Yoongi fails to hide the blush on his face – it appears that he’d been found out. 

Jungkook thankfully doesn’t make any further comment but there’s an expression that never leaves his face as the two of them talk. Maybe Yoongi’s just reading into it a little too much, but it looks...smug? The smile is just shy of a smirk, but it’s not one that’s mocking Yoongi in any way. It looks good on him, Yoongi has to admit. 

They’re about half-way through the meal and Jungkook has softened a bit more when he asks “Hyung...maybe I’m being a little too forward about this but,” he puffs his cheeks out and tilts his head. Yoongi’s heart stutters at the cuteness. Jungkook is utterly and adorable, and will certainly be the death of him. “Hyung. Is this a date?” 

Yoongi swears that his heart does actually stop this time around. He wipes his hands on his jeans because they’re starting to feel clammy. He's so caught up in his own panic that he almost doesn’t notice Jungkook’s own reaction. Almost. 

The younger boy is looking down at his plate, but his fingers are playing with the small hoop on his ear. It's a clear sign that he’s just as nervous too, and Yoongi feels less alone. The door opens behind him, and a bunch of loud voices crowd in, so Jungkook almost misses the quiet “It’s a date if you want it to–” 

“Oh look! It’s Yoongi and Jungkook! Hey guys!” 

And Yoongi swears. He loves his friends. He really does. But they have the worst possible fucking time in the damn universe. He must look constipated to Jungkook right now but he turns around to greet the idiots and counts that one, two, three, four and all five of them are here – wait, who’s the new dude with pink hair – was that... 

“I like the hair, Namjoon-hyung,” Jungkook laughs. They all collectively break out into snickers as Namjoon grumbles and slides his glasses further up his head. Hoseok turns around “Hey Mr. Lee we’re going to join Kook and Yoongi-hyung! Put it all on Seokjin-hyung's tab!” and they all promptly squish into the table. 

Yoongi hates them. He swears he does. 

Jungkook looks at him apologetically and Yoongi sends him what he hopes is something similar back. It most likely resembles a grimace. The two of them reluctantly trickle back into the others’ conversation. 

“Why even is your hair pink?” Yoongi asks, curiously eyeing the damp strands of Namjoon’s freshly dyed hair. His hair wasn’t pink when he last saw him on Tuesday. Namjoon glares at Seokjin, who smirks. “Let’s not go there, hyung.” 

Taehyung grinned and filled in for him instead “The short story involves popcorn, feet and boredom. The best part is that Joonie-hyung dug his own grave.” 

Yoongi is even more confused, but he sympathises with Namjoon who pulls down the hood of his jacket a little more firmly. 

Everything is fine for while. They all laugh at Namjoon and Yoongi, and even Mr. Lee joins in when he comes around with more food and soju. Yoongi wants to know who ordered the damn soju. He keeps a careful distance from the drinks though, and sips on a soft drink as the rest of them start getting tipsy. It’s all fine. 

But the trouble starts when Hoseok playfully throws a fry at Jungkook and the youngest retorts with a frustrated “That's it hyung! I was able to cope when you threw that banana at me that one time, but this is too much!” and before Yoongi’s eyes, a full blown small-scale food fight breaks out on the table. Fries fly around him and he sees a stray cube of radish zoom across the table and fall straight into Taehyung’s mouth. 

He watches Jungkook, and sees the mirth in the younger boy’s eyes as he tries to fend off Jimin from putting an ice-cube down his hoodie. Namjoon lets out a dying noise and mutters “We’re going to get kicked out.” that nobody except Yoongi hears. 

And they do get kicked out. Mr. Lee smacks everyone except Namjoon and Yoongi upside the head as they are forcibly removed from the premises. Yoongi trails behind the group and sighs up at the sky. So much for that evening. 

Someone grabs his wrist. 

“Hyung.” comes a quiet voice. Yoongi whips around to face Jungkook. They stay there as the rest of the group keeping moving, unaware that they’ve left two people behind. 

Jungkook releases Yoongi’s arm and shoves his hands into the pockets of his overalls. “We should, um, do this again. Since, you know, our last meet-up was ruined.” 

“Oh.” Yoongi’s voice sounds a little empty. Meet-up. Jungkook nods a little tersely, and his brows furrow a little “I’ve been wanting to watch a movie for a while. Does that sound okay?” 

Yoongi nods and Namjoon yells at them to hurry up. The two of them groan and quickly jog up to join the rest of the group. They split off in their own directions to get to their apartments and Yoongi’s phone buzzes.  

‘ mignight screening for kimi no nawa on saturday mornign sound ok ?’  

‘ its at 0010 so maybe we could meet earlier??’  

‘only if youre ok with that though!!’  

‘sorry about tonight’  

‘i wish we could have had more time to ourselves’  

‘sorry if that sounds weird’  

Yoongi smiles at the chain of messages that are littered with emojis. He replies that it’s all cool for him and assures Jungkook that he doesn’t sound weird. He’s got a shift at the bar until half eleven on Friday and it takes him around twenty minutes to walk down to the theatre from work, so he’s okay with it. 

He flops onto his bed with a sigh. He’s a little thrown that Jungkook decided to call it a meet-up, but Yoongi did suppose that there wasn’t much for it to be called a date. He watches the trailer for the movie that Jungkook wants to watch with him. It looks interesting and he falls asleep to the thought that maybe he’d be able to catch a break in his life this time. 

Friday passes by in a blur and he leaves the bar with earphones on and ignores the few looks he gets while on the way to the theatre. It’s funny but he’s gotten used to it now, and doesn’t bother hiding his hair underneath beanies anymore.  

He arrives and finds Kook waving wildly from across the foyer. “I got the tickets!” he says excitedly. Yoongi ruffles his hair fondly and Jungkook points out that they’re wearing matching tops. Yoongi looks down at his clothes. He’s wearing some cuffed jeans and a yellow Rolling Stones t-shirt with a leather bomber jacket Seokjin had given him for Christmas then looks over to Jungkook. He too is wearing a Rolling Stones t-shirt, except it’s white and covered by a fuzzy looking blue cardigan. “I guess we are,” he says smiling. Jungkook beams at this and they head into the theatre together. 

Kimi no Nawa, Yoongi decides, is a brilliant movie. He wants to thank Jungkook for showing him the wonders of beautiful animation. Of course, Noragami existed before that, but damn this movie was brilliant. He would definitely have to watch it again. Mostly because the story was incredible, but also because Jungkook had held his hand around the point where Taki decides to call Mitsuha and Yoongi hadn’t really been able to focus on much after that. But like he said earlier, it’s mostly because it was a good film. 

Speaking of which, Jungkook still hadn’t let go of his hand. And Yoongi didn’t mind that. Not at all. It’s just that he was afraid that Jungkook could feel his hands start to get clammy and would begin to think that Yoongi was gross. Which he wasn’t – not really. Just really nervous. Because he was holding Jungkook’s hand. 

They walk out of the theatre like that and Jungkook turns around to face Yoongi. The early morning wind blows and they both shiver a little “Thank you for coming out with me, Yoongi-hyung,” he hums sweetly. His eyes scrunch up cutely as he tilts his head and smiles and – oh god, Yoongi wants to kiss him. 

Jungkook’s eyes were a little red-rimmed from the little sniffles he had during the movie, and his cheeks and nose were flushed from the cold air. He looked so beautiful. 

“Hyung?” 

Oh shit, he’d been spacing out. 

“Pardon?” 

Jungkook’s face flushes bright red and he looks away briefly “Ah...I asked if I could kiss you...this is a little embarrassing.” 

Yoongi’s eyes widen and Jungkook panics “Oh no. Was I reading into this too much? Can you forget I said anything? Oh god I’m so sorrmph-!” 

It’s the early hours of Saturday morning when Yoongi pulls Jungkook down to kiss him. The world is quiet around them when Yoongi feels Jungkook pull him closer with a smile. It’s just the two of them in the most unromantic place next to a dingy alleyway when they hold each other. Yoongi feels Jungkook’s hands in his hair, and Jungkook probably feels Yoongi’s hand wrap around his waist too. 

It felt like forever. 

They pull away, a little breathless, and a little more shy. “I like you Jungkook.” Yoongi says. Jungkook giggles “I couldn’t tell at all hyung,” the younger boy laughs. He opens his mouth to say something but Yoongi’s phone goes off. They both startle and Yoongi pulls his wretched device out. It’s Seokjin.  

‘ Yoongichiiii ’  

‘ im  locked out.’  

‘will you be home soon?’  

‘answer me dumbass  i  can see you reading my messages’  

He looks at Jungkook exasperatedly “Our friends have the worst fucking timing,” he laments. Jungkook smiles amiably “Tell me about it,” he agrees. 

Yoongi’s about to leave when Jungkook calls him back “Hyung. What are we?” 

Yoongi tries for humour “Humans, Jungkook.” 

Jungkook frowns “That’s not what I meant hyung, and you know that.” 

Yoongi fidgets with his zipper “You tell me Kook-ah. I’m just as nervous as you.” 

Jungkook chews on his lip. “Are we dating? Can...can I be your boyfriend?” 

“Do want us to be dating?” 

Jungkook nods eagerly. And Yoongi smiles wide. 

“Then I guess we are,” 

He holds out a hand to Jungkook and says “Jeon Jungkook. I really like you. I hope you like me too. Will you be my boyfriend?” 

Jungkook laughs again and takes Yoongi’s hand “Of course Yoongi-hyung. I would love to.” 

He leans in to press a kiss against Yoongi’s forehead and then he whispers a goodbye as he walks home. 

Yoongi follows after the younger boy until he turns at a street corner and his phone buzzes again. 

'YOOONGIIIIIIIIIII'

He hates his friends. He really does. 

Yoongi texts Seokjin to shut up before he jogs back down to his apartment. 

When he gets home, he gets a message from Jungkook this time. It makes him smile until Seokjin tries to get nosey and figure out why he’s so happy. 

‘ i had a great time today  yoongi hyung . thank u. see u soon’

It takes another week and an exceptionally jittery heart before Yoongi comes to terms with the fact that: not only does he like Jungkook and want to go out with him and do all the sweet things like kiss him silly against brick walls and under umbrellas in the rain, but also that Jungkook maybe also likes him back. They did kiss after all. That one time after the movie, and also all the other times in the next few days after that. Okay, so Jungkook definitely likes him back.The second fact still makes the air in his lungs whoosh a little. He's happy. So happy.

When he finally decides to tell his friends, a blushing Jungkook hiding behind him, they all look at him in a mixture of confusion, smugness and happy grins.

"Weren't you dating already?" Hoseok asks. Seokjin elbows him in the ribs in the most unsubtle way possible and Hoseok glares at him. "I was joking," he amends.

"You two are just very close, is what he was getting at." Jimin adds.

If Yoongi thought that Jungkook was blushing a pretty pink before, his face looked more like a tomato now. And even then, Yoongi couldn't bring himself to think anything else apart from the fact that he was still absolutely adorable.

"When did this happen?" asks a curious Namjoon.

Jungkook finally peers out from behind Yoongi - which first of all, is an impressive feat. "The Kimi no Nawa screening," he says timidly. Taehyung shoots up at that "Wait! The Kimi no Nawa screening? The one where you bailed on mine and Namjoon-hyung's Boku no Hero marathon? That screening?"

He looks at Jungkook incredulously. Jungkook hides back behind Yoongi. Namjoon snaps his fingers "This makes so much more sense now." he says thoughtfully.

Namjoon looks at Yoongi and gestures to him and Taehyung "We were both wondering why he came back home with red cheeks and a giddy smile on his face. You know, the rabbit-looking one?"

Jungkook squeaks out indignantly and Yoongi suppresses the urge to turn around and kiss him again right there in front of his friends because he wants to see that bashful Jungkook again. His heart swells up in happiness. He's happy. So very happy. Jungkook was a such a beautiful person in his life.

 *

Min Yoongi is very much a gay man. He won't get into the nitty gritty of it all, and he certainly won't be betting his precious university savings on it anymore.

One thing however, is that he loves Jungkook, and Jungkook loves him. Yoongi hasn't felt this happy for a long time in his life, and he's glad that Jungkook was able to let him finally breathe.

And in this moment? It's all he needs.