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“Goodbye.” Equius exhales solemnly, the muscles in his crossed arms tensing slightly.
Nepeta frowns, looking down at her dirty blue shoes. She pouts slightly and pulls at her oversized coat sleeves. Knowing that she must be strong, er, STRONG, for her moirail, she brings her eyes up to his obviously weary ones, bringing a smile to her face.
“Well ok, goodbye!” She says a little too excitedly. She doesn’t want him to leave. Her eyes begin to sting, warning that she might begin to cry. She shuts her eyes, her smile still wide on her face. She just barely catches herself from letting her voice crack as she speaks up once more. “But you had better believe I will see you again soon, Equius!” His name makes her heart beat in a sense that makes her know she is safe, cared for, and happy.
“Yes, you will.” He says straightforwardly. Nepeta opens her eyes and smiles up at him again. Of course they’ll see each other again. Why even question it?
She looks him up and down, locking his image in her memory. Her moirail, without whom she’d be so different. How he’s so protective and st- STRONG, and how he really does care for her, even though he has a tough outer shell. She’s glad she gave him her hat before. He seems to appreciate it.
He cannot seem to stop sweating now that he’s cracking his knuckles and neck. Equius gestures toward the horn pile, a faint smile twitching at the corner of his mouth. Nepeta’s face genuinely lights up and she scampers over to the pile. Another feelings jam in the pile?! Wonderful!
However, by the time she climbs to the top and rolls over so she’s sitting upright, Equius is by the door. Her smile instantly falls off her face. He opens the door, looking over his shoulder, giving Nepeta a final wave and toothy smile. And the door shuts.
“Eq…uius…” Nepeta sighs, her bottom lip quivering. She leans back into the horn pile, looking up at the grey ceiling. “What if I need to talk about my feelings on the pile…? I already miss my meowrail…” She sighs dramatically once more as she rolls off the horn pile as though it was a hill of grass.
Nepeta, of course, has already begun scheming. She shuffles to a different door from which Equius exited. Can’t have him knowing she’s leaving the room. She passes by her ship masterpieces, a smile growing on her face as she passes a pile of crates, behind which is her beloved OTP. But there’s no time for that.
She hopes Equius doesn’t get angry about her not listening to him and staying. But she HAS to go outside! There’s some saying about curiosity and a cat. She doesn’t exactly remember what it is, but it’s probably that a cat cannot help but explore and others simply must expect such an action.
Nepeta uses her blue claws to pry off the grate on the wall. It comes off easily. The vents are big enough to crawl through; it’s practically begging to be explored!
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Equius never understood why this place had to be so big. Who knew where the highblood was? After going down endless rights and lefts, following the sounds of the honking, he’s growing more and more frustrated. But it’s also getting progressively darker. So for some reason that obviously means he’s going in the right direction.
“At least Nepeta is safe…” He mutters to himself. He would never be able to forgive himself if something happened to her. Of course he knows she’s upset he’s leaving – he saw it in her shimmering green eyes. In trying to uphold his moirallegiance, he’s hurting her, which is not part of the job description of being a good moirail. Everything is so contradictory. Hopefully he’ll be able to see her again so he can make it up to her. He’ll put extra heart into the next roleplay. It’s worth it if it would make her smile and laugh again.
HONK
Equius’ muscles clench, because of course he wouldn’t visibly flinch. But that honk was so loud, so close. He knows he’s getting warmer.
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It’s tricky being so like a cat. You get to be so easily distracted. This is the second time Nepeta thought a dustball was a mousebeast. But no. She mustn’t. Focus starts now. For real this time. She doesn’t know these ventilation paths well; she really doesn’t know whereabouts she is. No matter. Looking outside through another grate won’t hurt.
Nepeta squints her eyes as she looks through a grate. Oh! This time she sees someone. She thinks. There’s a silhouette of someone not too far from her. She sees a reflection of red glasses. Oh! Terezi!
“T-T-Terezi!” Nepeta calls, prying the grate off. It falls to the floor, clattering once it strikes. “Where have you been? Wanna, you wanna hide together?” She lands deftly on her feet after sliding out of the grate. “AC wonders how furr away her meowrail and the one who he’s stalking are. She’s too bored and lonely to wait for much longer all alone.” She pouts as she climbs up the vessel Terezi seems to be sitting on top of.
Once reaching the top, Nepeta freezes. Terezi isn’t this tall, as far as she can remember…
“Hey kitty cat.” A raspy voice comes from the figure just a pounce-length away from Nepeta. “You come here to play?”
“O-oh…! G…gam…zee…” Nepeta stutters, her voice dropping in volume quickly.
“Here… kitty kitty… play with me… MOTHERFUCKER.” Gamzee slowly gets to his feet and looks down at Nepeta, who is on her knees.
“G-gamzee, no thank you!” She starts retreating slowly, but feels her feet hanging off the ledge.
“I said, LET’S PLAY.” His body casts a dark shadow over her quivering figure as he takes another step closer. He chuckles once, dryly, reaching for his clubs. “HEH. …Honk.”
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Equius wipes his forehead, again, with Nepeta’s hat. He really is grateful that she gave it to him. He can’t seem to remember where he left all those towels. He holds the hat gently, not wanting to accidentally tear it or anything of the sort.
“HEH… Honk.” Equius hears the highblood’s voice echo from just down the hall. His pace somewhat quickens as he eyes an open door at the very end of the hallway; he folds Nepeta’s hat and puts it in his pocket.
Suddenly a high-pitched, anguished scream fills Equius’ ears, echoing up and down the hall. Something fills Equius. He cannot tell if it is anger or fear. Perhaps it is a combination of the two. Either way, Equius immediately finds himself sprinting down the hall towards that open door.
“Nepeta!!!” He shouts, turning sharply into the large room. He skids to a stop, absolutely frozen, not able to believe his eyes. In a heap on the floor lies his moirail, a pool of olive green blood oozing from her head. The highblood, Gamzee, twirls his clubs between his hands, the very same green blood dripping off them.
“NEPETA!” He shouts, his cry reverberating through his whole body. He runs to her, falling to his knees. “Nepeta!” Slowly he slides his hand under her neck, gently rolling her over. He feels nauseous. The side of her head, her temple, is crushed inward, green blood running out. Her eyelids are fluttering, her pupils dilating and shrinking uncontrollably, unable to focus on anything. His eyes drift to her horns, her once perfect little cat ear-shaped horns. His heart sinks as he eyes her left horn, the top half broken off. He sees the broken piece across the floor, just a few feet away. Equius feels his fingers clenching around her arms but immediately forcibly relaxes them, afraid to break her bones.
“N…nepeta.” Equius tenderly lays her head down on the cold floor. He clenches his now green-stained hands into fists, rising to his feet.
“You… you…” He grimaces at Gamzee, his fists shaking.
“What’s the matter, motherfucker?” Gamzee says, finally halting his juggling and holding his clubs still. Equius notices three narrow, but deep, scratch marks trailing across Gamzee’s face, purple blood oozing out. Oh, his brave moirail, trying to defend herself… “You should be happy she’s gone. MOTHER fucking PEASANT was in the way. Her blood looks best on the floor.”
“Shut up!!” Equius shouts. He takes three long strides towards Gamzee, and punches him directly in the face; the sounds of Gamzee’s nose breaking are very noticeably heard. “SHUT YOUR MOUTH THIS INSTANT.” A clatter echoes in the dark room from Gamzee dropping his dual clubs.
“You’re…next… motherfucker.” Gamzee says between breaths, a smile wide on his face. Blood is flowing out of his nose rapidly, staining his chest. He then gasps as Equius grabs him by the throat. He takes slow steps towards the concrete wall of the large room, dragging Gamzee along with him.
“Not a chance.” He growls, his eyes glowing with rage through his broken glasses. “I… command you to stop.” It looks like Gamzee is about to say something, for his gagging sounds intensify, but Equius tightens his grip on Gamzee’s throat. “Silence!” Equius roars. He clenches his jaw and lifts Gamzee up off his feet, throwing him towards the wall. There’s a sickening sound as Gamzee crushes into it, a small crater carved into the wall by his body. He falls into a bloody, crumpled mess on the cold floor.
There’s silence except for Equius’ heavy breathing.
“… … … N-nepeta!” He whispers to himself. Whirling around, he sees her on the floor just as he left her. Instantly he is at her side again. “Nepeta…?” Her eyes have stopped fluttering, but are now slowly opening and closing. She ever so slowly widens her blood green-tinted mouth into a wobbly smile.
“Equ…ius.” She whispers, her breaths shaky. Her pupils drift around, from looking at Equius in the eyes, to the ceiling, back to Equius, and finally to her own body, covered in green blood. “O-oh… purriosity… and the cat… oh.” She murmurs, finally remembering the old saying.
“Silence, Nepeta.” Equius brushes a lock of hair out of Nepeta’s face. “If you please.” He nervously clenches and unclenches his fists, now stained green and purple. “Steer…” He clears his throat. “Steer clear of straining yourself. You’ll… be alright.”
Nepeta coughs lightly, making Equius jump. She grins weakly. “Meowch. I’m sorry. Be…beclaws I didn’t listen to you…” Green tears well up in her eyes. Equius purses his lips and slowly slides his hands under Nepeta’s body.
“Silence.” He whispers. He gently lifts up Nepeta’s torso, one hand supporting her head and the other at the middle of her back, and brings her to his chest. “This is unacceptable behoovior.” He lays his hand on Nepeta’s head, where the blood is oozing out, trying to stop the current.
He can hear Nepeta snort. “Behavior?” He adjusts so Nepeta is on his lap, cradling her like a child. “Equius, I… nefur… expected this to happen.”
Equius is quiet for a moment, just looking down upon her.
“The…the moir-meowrail of the frisky feline-obsessed girl requests that said girl refrain from stalk, er, talking.” Equius says unevenly. “He wishes she would heal so the meowrails can… can talk about their felines on the horn pile and keep each other amewsed for, er, furr as long as pawsible.”
More tears flow out of Nepeta’s eyes, but Equius doesn’t know if he’s ever seen her smile so widely before. She sighs and looks down at her hands and claws. “A-Ac purrplexes why she has the furry scary troll’s blood on her.”
“Because- beclaws she fought back. She’s… she’s STRONG.” Equius mutters.
Nepeta sinks into Equius’ arms. She’s nearly deadweight in his arms; it scares him.
She laughs weakly, just a light laugh-filled breath. “I…” She laughs lightly again. “I udder to think what would have happened if you hadn’t showed up.”
“Nepeta, s-stop talking.” Equius’ voice gets progressively shakier and shakier.
“I’m so silly.” She smiles weakly. “Don’t furget me… Equius. Okay?”
“S-stop!” Equius shouts. Nepeta quivers slightly. “You’re going to be fine.” He unsteadily rises to his feet, holding her carefully.
“Why… do you purrtend now of all times?” Nepeta whispers, shakily reaching her hands up to Equius’ face. She rests her hands on his cheeks for a moment. Slowly she loops her fingers around his glasses, taking them off. “O-oh… Equius…”
His face always looked different without his glasses on. Usually he looked more tired. He never seemed to be able to sleep enough where the indigo bags under his eyes can fade away. But his toothy smile always seemed to complement them anyway. He looked tense very often, but it was for reasons that could be easily forgotten by a playful tacklepounce – like the hemospectrum, frustration regarding robot building, an unacceptable lack of towels, things like that. But Nepeta could always keep him cool and collected, being one of the few – if not the only one – who really treated him normally. They were both lucky in the domain of moirallegiance.
But she’s never seen him like this. His mouth is twisted, trying to keep a toothy smile on his face while fighting such excruciating feelings. His hair is stringy and sweaty – but then again that’s actually pretty normal. But his eyes, oh, his eyes. She’s used to seeing them outlined in blue from him being tired all the time. But now they’re shimmering blue, huge indigo tears welling up in his eyes, on the edge of surging out.
“It’s… okay, Equius. Feelings are okay. Just purrtend…I’m there to listen… when you get furrustrated…or sad.” Nepeta blinks slowly, awkwardly putting Equius’ glasses on her own face. “STRONG… Equius… will be just… feline.” She smiles once more at Equius, a few olive tears cascading down her cheeks from under the broken glasses. She leans completely into Equius’ body, absolutely still and limp.
“Nepeta, n-no. You’re being prepawsterous.” Equius goes to walk to the door. “You’ll be… tacklepouncing again in no time. Yes?”
Nepeta does not answer.
“I said… yes?” Equius freezes in his footsteps. He slowly sinks to his knees again. “Nepeta…? I c-command you to… answer me.”
Pain hits Equius right in the heart. No. Not her, not his moirail, not her of all trolls. The only one who didn’t care that he was grumpy or angry so often. The only one who showed real affection towards him. Who wasn’t afraid of him. Finally the dam breaks and tears pour out without any signs of stopping.
“NEPETA!!!” Equius shouts, his whole body shaking. “Please!!!! … Please…!”
He sobs uncontrollably while still holding Nepeta with the utmost care. He begs for her to look at him, to answer him, to light up his world with a smile once more.
He slips his hand into his pocket until his fingers close around a soft fabric. He pulls out Nepeta’s blue hat, slightly damp from him sweating before. He holds it to his face, weeping into it. Whimpering words of sorrow and regret, wishing he was a better moirail, been there for her better.
“Nepeta… please come back?” He mutters to himself, breathing heavily. He lays her back down onto the cold floor gently. He reaches out and closes his fingers around the piece of her horn that broke off. He cradles it in his hands gently.
Suddenly he hears a snapping sound, one he’s heard many many times before. Nepeta would always tease him about it. It was the sound that was heard every time Equius would try to shoot an arrow, the sound of the bow breaking in half. Before he has time to rise, he feels the bow string loop around his neck. He looks up and fear overwhelms him as he looks up into the widened eyes of Gamzee himself.
Gamzee’s dripping with blood from nearly everywhere – his nose, mouth, scrapes and gashes along his body. But he’s there. He’s alive. And he’s getting foggier and foggier through Equius’ eyes. Unable to focus, everything getting blurry and dark. It feels like he’s drowning. And there’s no urge to fight back in his heart. No desire to defend himself, unlike Nepeta. Nepeta had Equius in mind when she was fighting back. How he would be brokenhearted if she were hurt, let alone dead. But now that Nepeta’s gone, there’s no reason for Equius to fight back. Nepeta… the best meowrail anyone could ever ask for. A small toothy smile grows on Equius’ face.
His world goes black.
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Equius’ eyes fly open as he gasps for breath, clenching his hands into fists atop the wet grass. It’s raining; the sky is a dark grey. He slides his hands through his dripping wet hair, still breathing heavily, as he sits up, taking in his surroundings.
He’s… not really sure where he is. It’s a sort of forest, lush with bushes and trees, rocks and roots. Other than that, though, he hasn’t got the slightest idea.
Equius leaps to his feet. Nepeta! Never mind where he is – he’s right there! – but where’s his moirail?!
He wanders through the wood, calling for her over and over. He realizes he is in a dream bubble; it’s distressing, of course, but also somewhat comforting – they have an end somewhere, right? They can't possibly go on for infinity. He’ll find her eventually. If she’s here. But she has to be. Whose bubble would this be otherwise?
He keeps walking and shouting, following a creek flowing downstream.
Equius finds it odd that it’s raining so much. It’s a curious thought as to why it is. As well as if the rain will cease sooner rather than later.
For the umpteenth time he considers turning around and going a different direction.
He keeps walking.
Soon enough, however, he notices a green mass a slight distance away. It’s not green like the bushes, or like the leaves, or the moss by the stream. It’s the same green as Nepeta’s coat – when it’s wet, that is.
Many a time Nepeta would be out hunting for too long and come back drenched, being stuck in a rainstorm of a sort, and often catching a cold afterwards. That mass… It’s green like the coat he’d hang up to dry… as he wraps her up in a puffy towel and oh so carefully prepares his cracked tea set for her. Green like the coat she’s had held up by two chairs, creating a sort of tent for the two of them to squeeze under. The same green color he’d watch fade away as she prances off to her own hive, promising to come back soon. Yes, that mass against that tall tree is indeed that green, her green.
He’s running towards the mound, at its side immediately. It’s quivering slightly. He slowly squats and pauses. Why is he hesitating? He’s been looking for what felt like sweeps. Now is not the time to pause.... er, paws?
“N…Nepeta?” He whispers, cautiously extending his fingers, wrapping them around the soaked fabric of the green jacket. He lowers himself onto his knees as he lifts up the jacket, bending forward so his face is closer. She’s curled up in a ball on her side, hugging her knees to her chest. Her eyes are shut tight but olive green tears are leaking out of the corners of her eyes. Her horn… is still broken.
“Nepeta…” He exhales. Her eyes fly open, the tears stopping, and stare right into his; he flinches, noticeably, when rather than looking into the shining green eyes he was so used to… her eyes are pure white.
“E…Equ…ius…” She shivers. “N…no…” Tears threaten to fall again as she realizes that her moirail is there with her, meaning he, too, has died. The rain falls down harder.
“Hush, now. It’s alright.” Equius whispers, gently pulling her up so she sits upright. “I’m here. It’s alright.” Her eyes widen as she tentatively outspreads her hand to touch his neck with her fingertips.
“Equius!!!” She cries, throwing herself into his arms. She starts sobbing into his chest. He gently lays his hands on her back, holding her close to him. Very slowly the rain slows in intensity and fades into a sort of mist.
“I-hic-I’m so sorry, Equius!” She cries. “I-if I hadn’t wandered off and-hic-and gotten into such troub-hic-le, we wouldn’t… wouldn’t be…” She breaks down in tears harder again.
“I insist you cease worrying yourself about such things, Nepeta.” Equius sighs, looking down at the top of her head. Her familiar tousled black hair that swishes up at the ends. Her per- purrfect horns not purrfect anymore. His stomach sinks as he again eyes her broken horn.
“It is I who should be apologizing to you.” He whispers to her. “I…I wasn’t… STRONG enough… to protect the one who means the most to me.”
Nepeta pulls her face away from Equius’ chest to look up at him. He gets another chill from looking into her blank eyes. There’s no doubt that his are the same monochromatic hue. She smiles at him.
“You’re the STRONGEST meowrail anyone could efurr have.” Her eyes scrunch up at the corners like they usually do when she grins too widely. It falters slightly as Nepeta slowly lifts up her hand to touch her horn, the broken one. “And we match now, too.” She smiles at him again, too genuine looking to make Equius even think she’s forcing it.
“We can stay in this bubble for a really long time, it seems…” Her voice drifts off as the rain stops completely and the sun starts shining brightly through the dissipating clouds.
Equius stands up and holds his hand out for her to take as she stands up too. She hops to her feet and doesn’t let go of his hand.
“Probably even… forefurr.” Equius gently squeezes her hand. Nepeta grins up at him, giggling when he starts sweating a little, and squeezes back.