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Remus Lupin to Fittest Freshers Flat 4 Life: Why are there bees in the flat???
Sirius Black: new number who dis
James Potter: bees?
Sirius Black:^thats my favorite card in cards against humanity lol
Remus Lupin: SIRIUS, WHY ARE THERE BEES IN THE FLAT?!?!
Sirius Black: why r u assuming its me?? this is profiling and i wont stand 4 it
Peter Pettigrew: the bees rnt mine
James Potter: pete you have to get one of us to kill the bugs in your room dont worry we know its not you lol
Remus Lupin: Sirius, you are the only one dumb enough to bring a box of live bees into this flat. Even James has more common sense than this.
James Potter: inspiring vote of confidence thanks m8
Sirius Black: how do u even know they r bees?
Remus Lupin: The buzzing is a big hint. As is the “iwantbees.co.uk” logo on the side of the box.
Sirius Black: alright so u know how im in the uni’s beekeeping society?
James Potter: since when??
Peter Pettigrew: omg y would u ever want 2 be around bees
Sirius Black: BECAUSE THEYRE DYING PETER
Remus Lupin: I thought you were joking when you said you joined beekeeping?? You were serious??
Sirius Black: *sirius and almost always ;)
Sirius Black: anyway we needed a new colony so i volunteered to order it. always looking 4 excuses to spend my familys not at all hard earned money
James Potter: of course
Sirius Black: but i maybe possibly definitely forgot to unmark the “shipping address is same as billing address” box. so. here we are.
Remus Lupin: You’re going to give me more heart problems than I already have. Please remove the box of stinging insects from the flat ASAP. Peter won’t come out of his room until they’re gone.
Sirius Black: consider it done
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Sirius Black to Chemistry Redhead: hey ur in the beekeeping society, right?
Lily Evans to Sirius from Chem: yeah ofc i am. save the bees and all that
Lily Evans: why?
Sirius Black: so i need a favour
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Lily Evans to The Favourite(s): hey you all remember sirius, right?
Marlene McKinnon: that fit guy who comes over to borrow your chem notes sometimes?
Lily Evans: that’s the one
Dorcas Meadowes: yeah he and his mates are in my writing module. they’re a laugh
Lily Evans: okay cool so i just agreed to do him a favour
Dorcas Meadowes: ( ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º)
Lily Evans: ew omg no not like that he’s so not my type
Marlene McKinnon: he’s exactly my type so feel free to give him my number ;)
Lily Evans: hard pass. i share a wall with you. enough said
Mary Macdonald: so what’s the favour?
Lily Evans: you know how i’m in the beekeeping society?
Dorcas Meadowes: hard to forget it after the great honey surplus™ last term
Mary Macdonald: i could barely look at honey until well after christmas
Lily Evans: you’re all weak
Lily Evans: but anyway, sirius ordered something for the society and he asked if he could keep it here for like… just a few hours this afternoon while he’s in class. then he’ll pick it up and take it to over to the hives.
Marlene McKinnon: he can pick me up and take me over ;)
Lily Evans: ffs marlene keep it in your pants
Dorcas Meadowes: fine with me
Dorcas Meadowes: the storing something here for a few hours. actually also marlene keeping it in her pants
Lily Evans: great! and remember, it’ll only be here a few hours so just… keep that in mind
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Mary Macdonald to The Favourite(s): BEES???
Mary Macdonald: THE THING HE IS KEEPING HERE FOR A FEW HOURS IS A BOX OF LIVE BEES?!?!
Lily Evans: now mary, please keep in mind that they are dying and we are nothing without them
Dorcas Meadowes: lol
Mary Macdonald: DORCAS HOW ARE YOU SO CALM ABOUT THIS
Dorcas Meadowes: my mum went through an exotic pets phase as part of her mid-life crisis. but since she didn’t want to actually pay for any exotic pets, she just got a tarantula who i ended up mostly taking care of. im chill with insects and such now
Marlene McKinnon: what time is sirius coming to collect them?
Lily Evans: a little after 4 i think. like i said, just a few hours!!
Mary Macdonald: YOU ARE ON THIN ICE LILY EVANS
Marlene McKinnon: ugh i won’t be back by then
Lily Evans: oh yes what a shame
Lily Evans: also quick sidebar: black’s friend who came with him to drop the bees off is super fit
Dorcas Meadowes: which one? tall with specs, skinny and blondish, or the short one?
Lily Evans: tall with specs
Dorcas Meadowes: yeah i could have guessed lol. he’s def your type. cute face, gangly limbs, and seriously dorky
Lily Evans: hmm interesting… well fingers crossed i see him again sometime!
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James Potter to Klaus: i think im in love
Sirius Black to Legally Blind: james…. i never knew you felt this way <3
James Potter: oh piss off im talking about your beekeeping friend
Sirius Black: lily?
Sirius Black: lol shes so out of ur league
James Potter: rude but not untrue
James Potter: but like actually shes the girl of my dreams. shes beautiful and funny and she had a spiderverse tshirt on and im in love
Sirius Black: good 4 u
James Potter: i need to see her again. i need to win her over
Sirius Black: well short of you either joining my chem class halfway thru the term or developing a sudden interest in beekeeping, ur shit outta luck m8
James Potter: sirius… my best friend…. you know how i have always cared deeply about the bees. they are dying after all
Sirius Black: lol this oughta b good
Sirius Black: bee good that is
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Sirius Black to Chemistry Redhead: thx again 4 keepin the bees at urs
Lily Evans to Sirius from Chem: no prob! anything for the bees!
Sirius Black: do u know when the next meeting is?
Lily Evans: this friday i think
Sirius Black: okay cool
Sirius Black: and uh… how mad would fabian be (bee lol) if i brought someone new along?
Lily Evans: probably pretty mad. he’s been quite hostile to newcomers since snape almost destroyed a colony when he was stalking me after our fight
Sirius Black: lol good times. his face puffed up so bad
Lily Evans: yeah he’s like properly allergic to bees and i also hate him so like why did he come
Sirius Black: anyway… i might bring someone to the meeting friday so fair warning
Lily Evans: i’ll back you up with fabian don’t worry lol
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James Potter to Squidward: remus… my dearest friend… will you come with me to beekeeping on monday?
Remus Lupin to James Neutron: Wtf
Remus Lupin: Why?? Sirius is bringing you!
James Potter: yeh but he knows everyone there already so i want another new person with me
James Potter: also i am in love with that beekeeping girl and sirius wont help me
Remus Lupin: I am not helping you terrorize some poor girl at a beekeeping meeting omg
James Potter: youre a rotten friend
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James Potter to Peter Piper: peter… my dearest friend…
Peter Pettigrew to Jams Paper: not even 4 money
James Potter: worth a shot
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James Potter to Squidward: ill make you those brownies you really like
Remus Lupin to James Neutron: Deal.
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Lily Evans to Black and Yellow: i thought you were only bringing one person?? why are there three of them?? and why is one of them hyperventilating??
Sirius Black to Evanzzzzzz: i myself thought i was only bringing one until about 20 minutes ago. but here we are.
Lily Evans: why are they all here?
Sirius Black: well james (the one u met @ ur flat) said hes here for the bees. but he got nervous about being new so he brought remus. and peter is dead afraid of bugs but didnt want to feel left out lol
Lily Evans: you should at least send peter home lol
Lily Evans: or have him meet up with you after the meeting
Sirius Black: prob a good idea. ill suggest it
Sirius Black: annnnd off to the pub he goes
Sirius Black: majestic bastard
Lily Evans: impressed with how fast he’s running honestly
Lily Evans: oh shit here comes fabian good luck lol
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James Potter to Paddington Bear: is that ginger guy always so uptight lol
Sirius Black to Jimothy: kinda lol. hes nice but hes wary of newcomers after snivellus came last term and snaped everything up
James Potter: so like… how do i get lily to notice me
James Potter: and then go out with me
James Potter: and maybe someday marry me
Sirius Black: ambitious
Sirius Black: but not my problem lol. im here for the bees. remus is here for ur lady problems
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James Potter to Chocoholic: so uh…. what do i do lol
Remus Lupin to Bad With Women: You be quiet and listen to Fabian. This is actually quite interesting.
James Potter: noooo i mean about lily
James Potter: remus?
James Potter: remyyyyyy
James Potter: you are two seats down from me stop ignoring my texts!!
Remus Lupin: Have you considered oh I don’t know… talking to her?? Maybe after the meeting?
James Potter: but what do i say??
Remus Lupin: Maybe invite her to come with us to the pub? Tell her she can bring her friends?
James Potter: orrrrr i get sirius to do it and wait until i have alcohol in my system to feel brave
Remus Lupin: Why do I even bother?
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Lily Evans to Remove the Furby from the Flat: hey so sirius invited me to the pub with his friends and told me to invite my friends so this is your invitation. we’re going to the one across the street from the sainsburys and are heading there now
Marlene McKinnon: YES
Marlene McKinnon: LET ME LOOK FOR MY LINGERIE
Lily Evans: also sirius’s friend james is super cute so like… anyone can feel free to wingwoman for me!!
Dorcas Meadowes: lol this is gonna be such a weird night i can’t wait
Mary Macdonald: yay! i’ll make sure we get going in the next 10 minutes because i don’t trust marlene to get ready quickly
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James Potter to Pluto is a Planet Gang: how am i doing so far??
Remus Lupin: You’ve barely looked Lily in the eye the entire hour we’ve been here.
Remus Lupin: So pretty much as expected.
Sirius Black: stop hiding in the loo, do a shot of tequila with me, and then man up and talk 2 her. shes like the least intimidating person i know. she has a colour coordinated highlighting system for her notes lol
Remus Lupin: James, you remember what happened last time you had tequila
James Potter: pffft it was fine itll be fine lets do that shot sirius
Peter Pettigrew: i wanna do a shot 2!!
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Peter Pettigrew to Lupus: think i hav a shot with dorcas from writing?
Remus Lupin to Pumpkin Eater: She’s a lesbian?? Like very proudly??
Peter Pettigrew: wait really?? r u sure
Remus Lupin: She literally shared a piece of writing in class the other day about her experience coming out!! As a lesbian!!! So yeah I’m pretty sure!!!
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Lily Evans to The Furby Has Been Removed: do you think james hates me?? he is barely talking to me
Mary Macdonald: noooo i think he’s into you! he’s been looking at you a lot when you aren’t looking
Dorcas Meadowes: potter is an odd bloke don’t worry he’s probably nervous
Marlene McKinnon: yeah sirius says he thinks youre fit
Lily Evans: okay im gonna keep trying to initiate conversations with him
Lily Evans: aaaaand peter is down for the count nvm guess it’s time to call it a night
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Sirius Black to Pluto is a Planet Gang: absolutely disgraceful behaviour last night peter. u were only at the pub for like an hour longer than us. u have brought shame upon this flat
Peter Pettigrew: sry!!! i think that tequila shot mixed badly with all the cheese i had b4 beekeeping
Remus Lupin: Gross! Didn’t need that background info!
Sirius Black: also james– marlene put lily’s number in ur phone on the walk home last night. ur welcome lol
James Potter: YOU ARE MY SAVIOUR
James Potter: okay here goes nothing
James Potter: im gonna do it
James Potter: okay i mean it this time im doing it
Sirius Black: its been 20 minutes. do it or ill log onto ur icloud and do it 4 u lol
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James Potter to Lily Evans ;): hey! this is james from yesterday/last night. your friend marlene snuck ur number onto my phone haha
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Lily Evans to Why is There a Furby on the Roof:omg james just texted me!!!
Lily Evans: he said u gave him my number, marlene?
Marlene McKinnon: lol guilty
Dorcas Meadowes: how was sirius?
Marlene McKinnon: really good but probably just a 1 time thing. we both give off too much chaotic bi energy to ever be more than FWB lol
Dorcas Meadowes: an honest and fair assessment of the situation. i respect it
Lily Evans: at least it was at his instead of ours
Mary Macdonald: have you texted james back yet??
Lily Evans: ahhhh no i’m nervous!!
Dorcas Meadowes: that boy did a writing exercise recently about how coming to terms with the fact that he may never be able to grow a moustache was like… one of the most consequential moments of his life. please do not allow him to make you nervous
Lily Evans: okay you’re right!! i’m a strong independent woman! i can text a hot guy back!
Lily Evans: no wait im scared
Marlene McKinnon: do it and ill remove the furby from the premises permanently. no loopholes
Lily Evans: DEAL
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Lily Evans to James Potter: haha hey! sorry she did that she doesn’t really have boundaries
James Potter: lol ive been best friends with sirius for years so i completely understand having a friend with no boundaries
Lily Evans: haha glad to meet someone who gets it. and also, as i hear, a fellow bee enthusiast
James Potter: oh yeh. love the bees. so important. where would humans bee without them?
Lily Evans: haha nice pun ;)
Lily Evans: how’s peter feeling this morning?
James Potter: alive haha which is all we can really ask for
Lily Evans: very true. im bummed the night had to end early but glad he feels better!
James Potter: yeah it was a fun night! we should all hang out again sometime!
Lily Evans: definitely! i’d love to get to know you more ;)
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James Potter to Insane in the Rembrane: SOS LILY JUST SAID SHED LOVE TO GET TO KNOW ME MORE LIKE ME SPECIFICALLY WITH A WINKY FACE WHAT DO I DO
Remus Lupin to Jam Jar: Ask her out?? Like a normal functioning person??
James Potter: AHHHH OKAY IM GONNA DO IT
Remus Lupin: Are you giving yourself a pep talk to the Rocky theme song?? I can hear it from the living room
James Potter: HELL YES I AM LETS DO THIS!!!
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James Potter to Lily Evans ;): would you maybe like to grab a drink sometime next week then? maybe take the mates out of the equation to prevent any sudden ends to the night?
Lily Evans to James Potter: i’d love to :)
Lily Evans: want to go after beekeeping next week?
James Potter: yeh sounds great cant wait :)
Lily Evans: can’t wait either :)
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Lily Evans to Furby Free Flat: I’VE GOT A DATE WITH JAMES NEXT WEEK!!!
Mary Macdonald: yay congrats!!!
Dorcas Meadowes: well done. i think you and james would be good together. youre both weirdos but like in fun socially acceptable ways
Marlene McKinnon: if youre gonna spend the night with him, make sure to go back to his. their flat is insanely nice
Marlene McKinnon: and good job on the date and all that. proud of you
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James Potter to Pluto Is Not a Planet Sirius: I’M GOING OUT WITH LILY NEXT WEEK!!
James Potter: also i think im now a permanent member of the beekeeping society
Sirius Black: congrats m8
Sirius Black: on the beekeeping society thing. very important cause. also i guess on the date or whatever
Peter Pettigrew: yay!! happy i didnt ruin ur chances
Remus Lupin: Glad to hear you managed to ask her out!
Remus Lupin: I also think I would like to be a permanent member of the beekeeping society. It was a really interesting meeting.
Peter Pettigrew: i dont hav 2 be a member do i?
Sirius Black: ur not allowed to be a member after yesterday lol
Peter Pettigrew: ok good
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Marlene McKinnon to Siriusly Hot: hey random question
Sirius Black to Marlene McKiller: whats up
Marlene McKinnon: would you be interested in a furby? lily is making me finally get rid of it and i figured you could find some things to do with it.
Marlene McKinnon: its dead useful in driving your friends up the wall
Sirius Black: WOULD I!
Sirius Black: hell yes bring that demonic thing over here. im gonna hide it in the ceiling lol
Sirius Black: and while we r on the subject, have you ever heard of the “longer furby”
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James Potter to Lupin-ta Nyong’o: do you hear something?? like randomly making noise??
Remus Lupin to Jamesie Lannister: Okay yes I do. I thought I was going crazy.
James Potter: it sounds like its coming from the ceiling
James Potter: im gonna check in my room
James Potter: nope nothing there
Remus Lupin: nothing in my ceiling
Remus Lupin: I’ll check the living room
James Potter: are you okay??? i heard a shout
Remus Lupin: Furby…. in the ceiling…. I didn’t know their eyes glowed… I think I’ve looked into the face of pure evil….
James Potter: ill yell at sirius for you don’t worry. you have a lie down and ill make some tea
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James Potter to Closet 1D Lover: lol nice one with the furby
Sirius Black to Neopets Addict: thx m8 i was pretty proud of that one
James Potter: but if remus asks i totally scolded you
Sirius Black: i gotchu
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Lily Evans to James: can’t wait for tomorrow :)
James Potter to Lily: same here :)
James Potter: ill see you at beekeeping <3
Lily Evans: see you then!! <3
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Dorcas Meadowes to True Friends (by Hannah Montana): marlene what the fuck is this thing
Attachment: 1 Image
Mary Macdonald: omg that is horrifying
Marlene McKinnon: meet our newest flatmate: longer furby
Lily Evans: it can have my room. im moving out.
Marlene McKinnon: don’t worry i only get it half the time. i’ve got joint custody with sirius
Dorcas Meadowes: so you’ve moved from friends with benefits… to coparents of a demonic meter long furby
Marlene McKinnon: its closer to 2 meters actually. but yes essentially
Mary Macdonald: well text sirius and tell him its his turn with the kid!!! reg is coming over later and he might actually have a panic attack if he sees that thing
Marlene McKinnon: im sure reginald can handle it. have a little more faith in him.
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Marlene McKinnon to Co-Parent: lol can i bring the furby to yours? mary’s boyfriend started crying when he saw it. apparently he had a traumatic incident with a furby in his youth
Sirius Black to Furby Mum: lol havent we all?
Sirius Black: but yes bring him over i can use it to mess with james after the date tomorrow
Sirius Black: also can i have it for halloween this year?
Marlene McKinnon: lol that’s like 6 months away but yeah why?
Sirius Black: i wanna dress up as britney spears’s iconic vmas performance with the snake but with the furby draped over my shoulders instead
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James Potter to Lily: you look really pretty today :)
James Potter: sorry i didnt get to say so earlier
Lily Evans to James: aw thank you :)
Lily Evans: yeah fabian is really strict about starting meetings on time. sirius should have known better lol
James Potter: im going to pay attention now because remus keeps giving me dirty looks but i am really looking forward to tonight :)
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James Potter to The Jonas Brothers (Including Frankie): this is the best date of my life
Remus Lupin: Happy to hear it!!
Peter Pettigrew: yay i like her she was nice wen i was sick
Sirius Black: u gonna be bringing her back here?
James Potter: nah im just enjoying getting to know her for now. hoping for a kiss at the end at most
Sirius Black: lol probably for the best
James Potter: why do you say that??
Sirius Black: no reason! have fun on ur date!!!
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Lily Evans to Non-Negotiable Furby Ban: this was the best date of my life!! he’s walking me home now!!
Mary Macdonald: yay!!!
Dorcas Meadowes: too cute. glad it went well!
Marlene McKinnon: we will have a bottle of wine waiting for the full date recap. red or white?
Lily Evans: ugh love you ladies. lets go red
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James Potter to The Jonas Brothers (Including Frankie): walking home now after dropping off the most amazing woman ive ever met after the best date ever!!!
Remus Lupin: Glad it was a good night!
Remus Lupin: Did you get that kiss?
James Potter: yes :)
Sirius Black: lily is still out of your league but good job managing to convince her youre worthy
James Potter: okay im about to get in and am exhausted. proper catch up tomorrow?
Remus Lupin: Sounds good! Peter is already asleep anyway
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James Potter to The Jonas Brothers (Including Frankie): WHAT IS IN MY BED
James Potter: WHAT IS THIS
James Potter: IS THIS A FURBY???????
Attachment: 1 Image
Sirius Black: ah yes meet “longer furby”. hes marlene and i’s child. thought you could use the company in bed since lily isnt here
James Potter: i hate you so much omg
Peter Pettigrew: whatsgpn on
Remus Lupin: Go back to bed, Pete. Sirius is just being dumb.
Remus Lupin: And if that affront to nature ever finds its way into my room it will be destroyed
Sirius Black: copy that
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Lily Evans to James <3: i had a really great time last night :)
James Potter to Lily <3: me too :)
James Potter: wanna hang out again soon?
Lily Evans: i would love to :)
James Potter: great :)
Lily Evans: so glad beekeeping brought us together <3
James Potter: we especially have to save those bees now after what they’ve done for us <3
Lily Evans: bee still my heart <3
James Potter: bee mine? x
Lily Evans: it would bee my pleasure x
