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Wanting was a fickle thing.
If there was a single message, an idea that Toga could take away from her experiences with Tsuyu, that was certainly it.
They changed so quickly, you see. Some days Toga would feel rather well, wanting nothing more than to spend time with her beloved, to be beloved. Other days she just wanted to her darling to hurt and scream and...well, one could catch on what she was wanting then. Toga couldn't even take all the blame! Tsuyu was just as active in her part of letting her fluctuating wants tear her whole.
Fickle, conflicting, insignificant wants.
Even so, the world would have been so much better if everyone just acted on their impulses. It's what Toga did. She felt like stabbing someone? She stabbed them. It made things so much easier, really. Oh, if only she could enlighten the whole world. That’s what the League of Villains was for, right? To make the world a better place.
Why, the only time she didn't act on instinct...well that was with her Tsuyu. God, what a pain that had been. She had considered someone else's feelings, acted in their best interest, done what was best for them. Gosh, is that what it meant to be a hero?
Thank God she was a villain.
Besides, it hardly mattered anymore. Consider it a part of her tragic origin story. Toga no longer needed those buttercup smiles and candy words.
(Nor her beautiful reflective eyes or kind actions or her anything really.)
Point was, her and Tsuyu were done, why waste any more time over it? She was being so stupid earlier, mourning and whatnot. No wonder people were always complaining about teenagers being overdramatic.
Whatever, she was fine.
"C'mon crazy," Dabi grabs onto her arm, dragging her, "We're going out."
Toga had hardly gone outside the base (was it even a base? God, they needed more funds) in weeks. It's not like she had a reason to. Not anymore, "Wah! Why? I don't wanna!'"
Dabi is unmoved, "Doesn't matter. We're going now."
"Dabi! Put me down! I'm going to stab you if you don't"
"Whatever. Just stop being a brat, will you?"
Toga gives a small nod, and true to his word, he lets go of her, "You know, if you wanted to ask me out on a date, there are better ways to do it!"
"I would rather die," Dabi sneers.
"C'mon babe! I mean, your scars are kinda' hot! See what I did there?"
"You get worse every day."
"Am I really so bad?"
"Are you seriously asking me that? Look deep into your heart, you know the answer."
"Point taken."
See, this is what Toga needs. Light hearted banter, a distraction. Ooh, perhaps her bestie has something nice planned for her? It's enough to make her go along with his rather rude demands.
It took walking (a lot of walking, like, the sun was about to go down) but eventually they reached a...hill. It was a lovely view, sure, but at the same time, she could have looked it up on her phone.
"Did you really drag us out here for a pretty view?" Toga crossed her arms, "We could've gotten caught!"
"Please, you know we're both too good for that," Dabi huffed.
"Ah! Stop flattering me just to get your way!"
"I don't flatter people."
"Well, you're never here to flatter. Why can't you spend some more time with your bestie?...can't you just explain yourself?"
He heaved a deep sigh, laying himself down on the grass, "Consider this an intervention."
"Dabi!" Toga's body froze, "Look, I only took a teeny tiny sip of your whiskey! It burned right after so I stopped! Er, also....um, it was dare! Yeah! Kurogiri had dared me!"
"You drank my...and you're blaming it on Kuro...whatever," Dabi rubbed his temple, "Just...we'll deal with that later. We're here to get you to make up your mind."
"Make up my mind?" she was was slightly relieved Dabi wasn't mad about the whole underaged drinking thing (murder was fine, but he had some decency) yet was even more confused.
He groaned, "I can't believe this. I about the whole thing with that girl, crazy. Frogger or whatever."
"Her name is Tsuyu," Toga spits before she can stop herself.
The scarred man chuckled, "There's the issue! I mean, it's actually pretty funny."
"Funny?"
"So dumb. Looney-bin, you have to make up your mind. Are you giving up Tsuyu or not?"
"I made up my mind!" Toga pouts, "I told you that even if kinda' miss her, I'm over it!"
"You were over it last week, and then I found you crying in the dark," Dabi sighed, "I honestly don't care what you do, but you need to work it out."
"Dabi dearest," she mumbled, "That's not helpful."
Dabi shrugged, "Not my place to help you. The problem isn't if you're making the right decision. It's your inability to make one."
Toga kicks his side lightly, "Boo! I didn't come out here for a lecture."
"Tough crowd," he scoffed.
"Why do you even care? It shouldn't even matter to you. It's my problem."
Dabi actually seems to consider the question. He closes his eyes in consideration for a brief moment, and turns to her, "Someone once told me, 'a weak mind constitutes a weak will, which constitutes a weak resolve and weaker action.' I may hate the guy, but it's certainly fitting."
"Yeah," the blonde nods thoughtfully, "You totally lost me."
"I'm telling you that you need some conviction. I don't care what you decide, you just need to figure something out. Letting this eat at you is going to be a issue for all of us. So, what do you want?"
Toga covered her face, "You can't just ask me such an important question like that!"
"It may be important, but it's not hard."
That...was annoyingly fair. Best be out with it then, "I want Tsu. I want to love her, to be loved by her. I want...I want her to hold on to me. I don't want anyone to take her away."
It's strange to hear the words. Sure, she knew this much for a long time, but she had never so much as admitted it to herself, much less said it aloud. Even if Tsuyu wasn't hers anymore, she wanted to keep her for herself. What if she had someone else? There was no way other's weren't in love with such an amazing person.
(Toga noticed how Uraraka looked at Tsuyu like she was the sun.)
"Great. So do something about it," Dabi snarked.
"But I also want Tsu to be safe and happy!" Toga explains. There is no other way to see it. Toga was not a good fit for Tsuyu. It would undoubtedly lead to issue upon issue.
Gagh, emotions.
"I wonder what she wants," Dabi murmurs to himself.
What Tsuyu wanted...?
"Oh my God! That's it!" Toga can't help the grin spreading across her face, "How could I have missed it? I've let her go, and it's about time to see if she'll come back!"
Dabi raises an eyebrow, "Does that mean you made a choice?"
"I have to work out the kinks...but yes. I have a super duper awesome plan! Oh, thank you my lovely Dabi!"
"Whatever, just don't drink my alcohol again, that stuff poisons your brain."
"Got it, sir!" she decided not to point out the extreme hypocrisy in his words.
This was it. Her wonderful plan. Oh this was an amazing idea. Who knew their wants could work together? No, matter now, she had some planning to do.
It was her final stand.