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It was a night just like any other. When Bakugou came back from the cafeteria with Kirishima and the others, he didn’t head back to his own dorm room, but instead found himself killing time with them in the common area.
A night just like any other.
The boys sat together chatting, their topics of conversation changing from classroom shenanigans to the latest video game, then from the changes in hero rankings to the cover girl of some adult magazine. The four of them were the only people in the common area, and without anyone or anything to be cautious about, the topic only strayed further and further. As teenagers thrown right into the tracks of the oncoming train called puberty, it was quite natural for them to be interested in feelings such as love (or lust), but Bakugou was an exception. As soon as Kaminari started steering the conversation in that direction, he lost interest, sipping his coke for something to do instead.
Bakugou, Kaminari, and Kirishima were all single. Had been since birth. Out of their little group, Sero was the only one who had graduated from the single club, having been with his girlfriend since middle school. She didn’t go to Yuuei, but that didn’t get in the way of their relationship at all. Last break, Sero even brought her over “to meet my best bros”, he said, but according to Kaminari, who had been trying with no avail to get a date for fifteen years, it was pure, unadulterated bragging that only served to further rub salt in his wounds. Especially since the girl was not only pretty with a certain demure air about her, but also stuck to Sero like glue, with Sero giving her frequent lovestruck glances as well. The green-eyed monster in Kaminari reared its head, but only managed a pathetic whine: “I’m good looking, I’m super nice to girls, how in the world am I still single?”
“It’s because you flirt with every girl! That’s why none of them want to date you,” Kirishima pointed out ruthlessly.
“But it’s not my fault they’re are all so cute! I like everyone!” Kaminari protested, “Hey Kirishima, is there a specific someone you like then?”
Having blurted out the first response he had off the top of his head, Kaminari wasn’t actually expecting it when Kirishima scratched the back of his head, seeming to hesitate. He opened and closed his mouth a couple times. No sound came out.
Kaminari and Sero rounded on him immediately, eyes gleaming. Even Bakugou straightened up, ignoring the rest of his coke in favour of Kirishima’s response.
This was important. Kirishima had secrets!
With three intent gazes directed at him, even a guy like Kirishima would blush, just a bit. He put his hand on the back of his head in embarrassment. “I wasn’t hiding it from you guys on purpose, I mean, it’s not like you asked either…”
“Get to it!” Kaminari cut him off excitedly, “Is it someone from our school?”
Kirishima nodded.
“Yooooooooo,” Sero dragged out an exaggerated exclaim.
“Our class?” Kaminari persisted.
Kirishima hesitated, flush steadily crawling up his face, but he managed to steel himself and nod, closing his eyes as if bracing himself.
“Didn’t see that one coming,” Bakugou commented, surprised.
Kaminari gasped dramatically. “How have you been keeping it a secret this whole time? Who is it?”
Kirishima, who was usually straightforward and frank, started to falter, face now so red it was almost the same shade as his hair. After a good couple minutes of getting zero information out of his stuttered mumbles, Kaminari decided to try a different approach. “Okay, you don’t have to actually say who. How about you describe, and we guess?”
Kaminari knew exactly what he was doing – there were only so many girls in the class. He was confident that once Kirishima started, he’d be able to pin it down in three sentences.
It wasn’t hard for Kirishima to figure out Kaminari’s little schemes, and he was feeling increasingly self-conscious, but at the same time he thought that according to the Bro Code, he should’ve told his friends a long time ago. Still, it was hard to fight off the lingering embarrassment, so he ducked his head and ran his fingers through his hair.
“The person I like has big, bright eyes.”
The moment that “the person I like” came out of Kirishima’s mouth, Kaminari latched onto Sero and started shaking him like his life was depending on it. Sero, narrowly escaping death by strangulation at the hands of his overly excited friend, coughed repeatedly and massaged his throat.
“Hair that’s fluffy and looks light as feathers.”
Kirishima went on, slowly shaking off his awkwardness as he described the person who held that special place in his heart. Even his gaze seemed to soften, as if that someone was standing right in front of him.
“Soft cheeks, smiles a lot.”
As though remembering something, a slight smile made its way to Kirishima’s face. Kaminari gawked, almost stupefied. When had he ever seen Kirishima look so soft? Love truly was amazing.
“Full of energy and jumps around all the time.”
With every sentence that came out of Kirishima’s mouth, the glint in Kaminari and Sero’s eyes grew brighter. Kirishima had hardly finished speaking when Kaminari yanked Sero out of the way, clearly unable to hold himself back any longer:
“So you mean —”
Before Kaminari was able to finish, a loud bang echoed across the common area, startling them all. He looked around and saw that the noise had come from where Bakugou was.
Bakugou had kicked his chair to the ground as he leapt to his feet, chest heaving with disbelief, coke can crushed in his fist.
The volume of his voice climbed dangerously close to a yell. “You mean… Holy fuck, you mean —!”
Kirishima, who was still experiencing something like an adrenaline rush, didn’t sense anything off with Bakugou. He shook his hands frantically and hissed, “Guys, keep it down! If you know who it is already, then don’t say it!”
Bakugou ignored him, too preoccupied with the answer he had. He was barely able to get a sentence out around his shock, but he was not going to let that stop him from making sure:
“The hair. Is it curly or straight?”
Kirishima was at a loss — if Bakugou had already figured it out, why was he still asking questions?
Still not catching on, he answered without thinking further. “It’s curly.”
Well, shit, Bakugou thought to himself.
Kirishima had a crush on Deku.
Bakugou was still deep in his thoughts, even after returning to his room.
Big eyes, soft cheeks, smiles a lot, with curly hair to top it all off…
Who the fuck else could it be, it’s Deku.
As for the jumping around, it’s not like he hadn’t seen Deku in battle, hopping around like a rabbit all the time, with those two stupid ears on his hood flopping behind him as he moved.
Wait a fucking minute though, weren’t they both guys? How would that even work?
Bakugou, who considered himself straight as a pole, felt his unshakable worldviews start to sway in the wind.
…After doing some research on the internet, Bakugou’s “straight as a pole” worldviews had been totally reconstructed. He now knew that it was not only possible, but possible in many many positions. When he finally got around to washing his face before bed, furiously scrubbing to banish any remaining memory of the images he just saw, it was long since past his usual bedtime.
Bakugou lay in bed, tossing and turning, restless even as the clock ticked past eleven. He felt so wide awake that it was like having flames blazing behind his eyelids. In the end, he kicked his blankets to the side. Fuck sleep.
Fine, you learn that one of your friends is gay, and has a crush on the useless little squirt who grew up with you (the strain in their relationship had improved somewhat, but at this point Bakugou was so used to calling him “Deku” that he wouldn’t ever consider changing the nickname), and it’s true that it’s a lot to take in, but honestly, Bakugou had never liked poking his nose in other people’s business anyways. Even if Kirishima was gay, even if he liked Deku, it was Kirishima’s own business. It made absolutely no sense for him to be affected to this extent, especially considering how exuberant everyone else was about it…
Just thinking about it ticked him off — if the fact that Kirishima liked Deku was already enough to make him seriously question his entire goddamn worldview, then Kaminari and Sero’s reactions were even harder to wrap his head around. They hollered with laughter like the pair of obnoxious idiots they were, as though they were ready to tell the whole world and celebrate together, with Bakugou being the only one shocked that Kirishima apparently had a crush on Deku. He felt something akin to dread creeping up on him: was there some secret gay code they were all in on? Was he missing something?
After listening to Kirishima’s confession, they both kept trying to pat him on the back and tease him, with Kaminari retelling and exaggerating everything that had just happened, as if he knew all along, yammering on about how he “always knew the way you looked at that person was special” as he elbowed Bakugou, “right, Bakugou? Right?”
…Right his ass.
How the hell was there anything special there? If the way Kirishima looked at Deku was special, then the way he looked at Kaminari would be deeply, soul-wrenchingly loving. Why didn’t Kaminari think that Kirishima had a crush on him?
Fucking hell… Why couldn’t Kirishima just go and like Kaminari instead?
The thought came out of nowhere, and it had him sitting upright on his bed in record speed as he realized, if Kaminari was the one Kirishima had a crush on… He’d probably be surprised, but it wouldn’t bother him. At least not to the point where he was unable to sleep because he couldn’t stop thinking about it.
What bothered him so much was never the fact that Kirishima was gay.
It was the fact that Kirishima liked Deku.
Deku again.
Bakugou felt his temper flare.
If literally anyone else was told that Kirishima had a crush on Midoriya, the most they’d think of it would be Kirishima coming out as gay, because no matter how you looked at Midoriya, he was obviously a guy. This reasoning was incredibly simple even for the average student, much less Bakugou, whose grades had always been in the top three of his class. But for Bakugou, this was different.
To Bakugou, Midoriya was different.
It was hard to actually put what Midoriya was to him into words, since he spent so long trying to deny the undoubtedly tremendous influence Midoriya had over him. Delving deeper, he didn’t think of Midoriya as “a guy”, “a girl”, or even “a person”. He was more like a concept, and Midoriya Izuku was just… “Deku”.
And he was just that. Just “Deku”.
Of all people, why did it have to be Midoriya Izuku… Why did it have to be Deku?
Why was it Deku, anyways.
So people could actually have crushes on Deku… Wait, so people could actually have crushes on Deku?
What was so good about him? Was Kirishima blind? You could walk into any McDonald’s and see a dozen freckled, curly-haired little nerds exactly like him!
How could someone like him…
…Be someone people would have feelings for?
Bakugou’s thoughts took him nowhere, and now, not only was he pissed off to no end, he also had no idea why. He felt strange, he felt annoyed, he felt the frustration coming at him like tides in an ocean, building and crashing inside him until he felt as if he’d explode from the impact. Realizing that “people could have feelings for Midoriya Izuku” made him extremely uncomfortable.
How could someone have a crush on him, why in the world would anyone have a crush on him, Midoriya Izuku, Deku, just “Deku”, and how…. How the hell could he be someone that people would have feelings for?
Bakugou’s inexplicable anger continued to simmer.
Next morning came around, and Bakugou still couldn’t get it off his mind. On his way to class, he happened to run into Kirishima, who couldn’t help noticing his deep scowl, since it made him seem even grumpier than usual. “What’s wrong, Bakugou?”
Seeing one of the very culprits, Bakugou’s already foul mood soured even more quickly. If it wasn’t for Kirishima’s absolute crap taste, his mood wouldn’t be this shitty to begin with. But some articles he read last night flitted across his mind, and his tone softened a touch. “…It’s not an easy road to take, so good luck.”
Kirishima, never having thought that Bakugou would be so supportive of him and his romantic endeavours, was so deeply moved that he was holding back tears and sniffles as he thanked Bakugou. “Thanks, man, you’re such a great friend! It’ll be hard, but I’ll do my best!”
Somehow, Bakugou’s expression darkened further.
Speak of the devil, the “freckled, curly-haired little nerd” that you could see a dozen of anywhere passed by at a brisk walk, muttering to himself, face buried in his notebook. He was so absorbed that he didn’t even notice the tree he was going to walk into soon. On reflex, Bakugou wanted to call out to alert him, but a strange feeling rising in his chest silenced him, smothering his words before they left his mouth.
The split second he spent hesitating was all it took for Kirishima to act first, crossing the distance in a few long strides and catching Midoriya by the wrist. “Whoa, Midoriya! Careful there!”
Midoriya jolted, as if just waking up. He looked around, bewildered until he saw Kirishima. “Oops… Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.”
Fluffy hair, soft cheeks.
“Thanks so much, Kirishima-kun,” He gave a quick bow as thanks, and when he raised his head back up, Bakugou saw his eyes, smiling, and his cheeks, slightly flushed from the earlier shock.
Big, bright eyes. Smiles a lot.
“No problem, don’t worry about it! Just be more careful next time, you shouldn’t read while you walk.” After receiving such sincere gratitude from Midoriya, it was Kirishima’s turn to be embarrassed, and the faintest hint of colour rose to his cheeks.
Watching them being all awkward and blushy only fueled Bakugou’s anger. His gaze locked on Midoriya’s wrist, still in Kirishima’s hand, and he had a sudden urge to yank it away.
And then what?
He didn’t give himself time to think it over, and he called out, almost impulsively, “Deku.”
It was only now that Midoriya noticed Bakugou, who was also right next to them, and his expression morphed quickly to a cautious one. He gave a slight, nervous nod in Bakugou’s direction. “Kacchan.”
Which did nothing to put out Bakugou’s temper, and it crackled and burned, flames rising even higher, licking away at him. Midoriya saw it on Bakugou’s face, nodded jerkily at Kirishima with a hasty “I gotta go now!”, and left at a quick run.
Always jumping around.
Almost subconsciously, Bakugou clenched his fists together, and his knuckles made an ear-grating popping noise.
Just now, Deku wasn’t smiling.
Despite the time it took after to get to the classroom, he still hadn’t calmed down, instead letting out his pent up energy by whirling his pen in rapid circles on top of his fingers. He’d learned the trick in elementary school, determined to be the best at everything, which naturally included spinning your pencil. At the time, Deku had looked at him with sparkling eyes, and said, “Wow, Kacchan, you’re so amazing!”
Deku couldn’t spin his pencil, so his go-to habit when he was thinking had been biting the end of his pencil, and the eraser at the end would always end up looking a bit worse for wear. This was something that hadn’t changed, even now.
Back then, Deku used to smile at him.
“Hey! Bakugou! What’re you staring so hard at?”
He turned around at the sudden slap to his shoulder, and saw Kaminari with a stupid grin on his face. “Oh, it’s Midoriya. Why d’you keep staring at him?”
Bakugou startled, and actually looked in the direction that he’d been facing earlier. Deku and Ashido were talking about something, and he looked awkward as hell, hands tugging at his own hair. Ashido seemed like she was having a great time though. Her hair was also fluffy and soft-looking, and the two poofy heads moving around in front of him annoyed him so much that he stood up from his seat abruptly.
“Whoa, chill, Bakugou!” Kaminari yelped.
Bakugou ignored him. “I keep staring at Deku?”
Kaminari was bewildered. “Yeah…? You’ve never noticed? I thought you were doing it on purpose.”
Bakugou’s expression clouded.
Not paying attention, Kaminari poked Bakugou in the shoulder and winked at him. “Anyways, you’ve been paying attention too, right?”
“Huh?” Bakugou’s mood carried over to his voice, and it came out harsh and clipped. “Paying attention to what?”
Kaminari lifted his chin towards where Midoriya and Ashido were, and whispered, “You know, the person Kirishima likes!”
Of all the topics to bring up.
Bakugou bristled immediately at the mention of his current sore spot. “Who the fuck cares about that piece of shit?!”
“Bakugou! You’re being too loud!” Panicking, Kaminari slapped a hand over Bakugou’s mouth and steered him out of the classroom with much yanking and dragging. The commotion made Midoriya and Ashido look over, identical confusion showing in their big, round eyes.
It wasn’t until they reached the hallway that Kaminari finally let go. As soon as he was free, Bakugou snarled at him, “What the fuck was that for?!”
“You were way too loud! Kirishima told us to keep it a secret!”
Bakugou clenched his teeth, not speaking.
Kaminari assessed the situation at hand and swallowed, praying that he wouldn’t make Bakugou angry again. “Okay, so… I thought something was off yesterday. You were listening just fine until Kirishima finished, then your face just looked like you were out for murder. I thought it was just me, but you’re doing it again today.
So I gotta ask, do you…”
“Shut it!” Bakugou snapped, every muscle in his body as taut as a bowstring, eyes darkened by anger, glowing a deep red.
Kaminari felt a headache coming soon. He honestly didn’t think that he was cut out to take the role of the attentive friend who gave good advice; that was Kirishima’s job, but unfortunately, Kirishima was at the very center of this mess. How would he even react if he found out?
God, this whole situation is like all the worst romance novel clichés lumped together! Kaminari couldn’t help but bemoan the responsibility thrust upon him and the romantic warzone his life had become.
Kirishima was gonna owe him, big time! Ten lunch tickets for having Yuuei’s top genius solve this tricky situation!
As reluctant as he was, he had no choice other than to tough it up and say it outright. “Bakugou, I know that you’re not gonna like this, but I really think you should give up. I mean, the feelings seem mutual…”
Bakugou stared at him, incredulous. “The feelings are mutual?”
Well, Kaminari winced, I sure blew it now. Bakugou didn’t look like he was thinking of giving up at all. Screaming internally about the hole he had already dug himself into, he tried a different approach. “Okay, never mind that, I’m not actually sure, since we only found out about Kirishima’s crush yesterday.” As an expert in theory but a noob in practice, Kaminari resorted to bringing out the terminology from all the dating sims he’d played. “Even at the base level, Kirishima’s got higher affection levels than you. It’d be way easier for him to succeed with this.”
Unlike Kaminari, Bakugou’s interests and hobbies took place in the real, actual world, but he was still able to get the gist of the message. He wanted nothing more than to set it straight that he didn’t have a crush on Deku, but the more pressing question forced its way out through his clenched teeth. “You’re telling me, that little shit likes Kirishima back?”
Kaminari nodded vigorously, silently thanking whatever had made Bakugou finally come to his senses. When he was done, he lifted his head, only to see Bakugou already walking away.
He let out a sigh. “So did that help at all?”
Turning his head to look back into the classroom, he saw Ashido tap dancing with her arms wide open, leaning forwards to show Midoriya her new hairclip. Despite being so interested in other people’s love stories, she was surprisingly oblivious when it came to herself. She was probably just asking Midoriya if he liked her hairclip, but she was leaning so close to him that even the tips of his ears had turned red. He nodded vigorously, hands gesturing all over the place.
Kirishima passed by, so Ashido went to him instead, asking him for his thoughts. Her skirt twirled with her movement, like a flower blooming. Kirishima smiled at her, seeming unsure how to handle her, but fond all the same. “It looks good on you.”
Anyways, Kaminari thought, still puzzled, Bakugou was being pretty mean with names like “that little shit”. After all…
*Yuuei Forum: No pointless posts, no personal attacks, have a great time and get posting!*
Title: Gasp! Can this brittle friendship withstand a great trial? How shall they choose between love and friendship? What should I do to keep us from falling apart beneath the surface?
Posted by: The Incredible Pikachu
So, as the title implies, I think two of my best bros have become rivals in love.
Since they’re pretty famous, I’m not gonna describe them here, or else you’d guess who they are. Anyways, we were just chilling last night, and one of them ended up telling us about his crush. We were all having a great time until he finished describing his crush, and the other one got SO mad. Not kidding here, he had the most terrifying face on for the longest time. I thought something was off, and the next day I see him staring reaaallyyy intensely at the first friend’s crush. So I was gonna ask him if he also had a crush on the same person, but he got mad before I could even finish… I’m kinda panicking right now, what should I do to save our friendship?
Top comment:
Nothing, it’s doomed, RIP.
[RecoveryGirlDiagnosis.jpg]
Deku… likes Kirishima back?
Deku has a crush on someone?
Bakugou didn’t get what he was so shocked and confused about. Who Deku liked, who liked Deku… what did that have to do with him? Deku could do whatever the fuck he wanted, go wherever the fuck he needed. He didn’t give a shit. If someday, somehow, Deku was thrown off the surface of this planet (and not by Bakugou himself), it’d be a miraculous demonstration of kindness if Bakugou didn’t just straight up break out the fireworks in celebration. He didn’t have time for trivial shit like building loving relationships with his classmates, much less Deku.
He’d never thought about how someone could come to have a crush on Deku, or vice versa.
Because, because —
Because what?
He thought back to when they were still brats, and everything about Deku was soft, so soft, like a little ball of fluff. Always crying, always scared, always shaking, but he would always wipe his tears away and run along behind him.
Even if he was pushed away, again and again.
He thought back to a few years ago, when Deku’s frame was still slight and weak. He would have his buttons fastened all the way to the top of his collar and ends of his sleeves, and the only skin that showed were slivers of neck and wrists, pale and stark against his jet-black uniform and ink-green hair. He was a shadow, hidden in the corner, but he never truly blended in with the gloomy darkness.
Because of the brightness that lit up his eyes.
Frustrated, Bakugou fisted his hands in his hair, face twisting into a scowl so deep that it felt carved into his features.
He decided to go straight to Deku.
Deku sat right behind him, and today Bakugou started to appreciate how convenient this was. School was out, and everyone else was already gone.
Midoriya, who had been sneakily snacking on his Pocky sticks, hadn’t even put his backpack on when he was trapped at his desk by Bakugou, who had planted his hands on either side of it.
This was something that never happened, and Midoriya’s instincts told him to grab his backpack and run, but Bakugou was so close that he had sealed off any escape route. It’s not like he could worm his way out from under the desk, so the only option left was to… stare right back at Bakugou. Midoriya gripped his backpack straps tightly. He vaguely registered the half-eaten Pocky stick still hanging out of his mouth, but he wasn’t even sure what he was going to do with it anymore. Spitting it out would be such a waste, but finishing it while staring someone down would be too awkward…
What on earth does Kacchan want?
He raised his head carefully, eyes moving up to meet Bakugou’s. Surprisingly, he didn’t seem like he was angry. On the contrary, he was silent, though there was a storm brewing, fierce waves rising from the ocean of red in his eyes.
But all Bakugou did was stare at him, long enough that the chocolate coating had begun to dissolve, the rich, sweet taste melting on the tip of his tongue. Finally, Bakugou spoke, “What…”
Midoriya jolted on reflex, the Pocky almost falling out of his mouth. He fumbled to catch it, and when he looked up again, the corner of Bakugou’s mouth was twitching. “Just fucking eat it already.”
For the first time in his life, Midoriya felt like he was chewing cardboard instead of Pocky.
He finished it despite the apprehension hanging in the air (to be honest, it still tasted good), and watched Bakugou take a couple of deep breaths, in, and out. Midoriya’s nerves fluttered along with the rise and fall of Bakugou’s chest.
“What… do you think of Kirishima?”
Huh?
That… That was it?
As bewildered as Midoriya was, he was a good student who answered questions properly. “Kirishima-kun? He’s great, of course. He’s optimistic, cheerful, and considerate of others. His quirk is well-rounded too, suitable for offense, defense, and assists. He’ll make a great hero in the future…”
“That’s not what I’m asking you!” Bakugou cut him off, snappish and irate, “Are you stupid?”
Midoriya found himself growing irritated as well, exasperation stirring in him. “What are you asking then, Kacchan?”
Bakugou opened his mouth, but words were failing him as he struggled to voice his thoughts. After a couple tries, he took a deep breath — “Do you like him?”
Now poor Midoriya was just beyond confused. Who wouldn’t like Kirishima? He was basically the sun in human form, bringing light and happiness everywhere he went. Even if Midoriya never really hung out with Kirishima that much, he could without a doubt feel his sincerity and kindness in everything he did.
So Midoriya answered truthfully. “I like Kirishima-kun a lot.”
He felt the instant change in atmosphere around them, tension raging bright and hot. Bakugou closed in so suddenly that Midoriya instinctively leaned away, the back of his head now almost flat against Mineta’s desk. It was very uncomfortable to be stuck between two desks in such a position, but he imagined that Bakugou, his arms on the desk the only thing keeping him from toppling right into Midoriya, had it worse. Despite that, Bakugou kept his eyes on him, glare intense enough to burn, and for a second Midoriya wondered if this piercing gaze alone was enough to skin and eat him alive.
Bakugou was doing everything within his power to squash his rage. If what he felt earlier was just frustration, then this was pure, focused anger. As soon as the word “like” had been uttered, he felt his control threatening to snap, and even trying his absolute hardest wasn’t enough to keep all the emotions that came roaring at bay. He clenched his teeth, and forced his words through them, syllable by syllable. “So if he said he wanted to be with you, you’d agree?”
Be with… as in team up?
The scorching tension rolling off Bakugou in waves made Midoriya cautious, and his answer wasn’t as sure as before. “I… I guess so.”
Bakugou got up, taking his hands off the desk.
Finally able to sit up straight, Midoriya reached behind himself to rub his back, which had gone sore already. It was then when he noticed the change — If he would compare Bakugou from just a moment ago to a volcano on the verge of erupting, Bakugou now was as if someone had somehow dumped enough ice into the volcano’s core to cool it down completely. He had frozen in his tracks, his furious mess of emotions entirely dissipated, leaving behind a cold core. He looked Midoriya dead in the eyes, and when he finally spoke, it was emotionless and distant.
Midoriya had never seen Bakugou like this before.
And Bakugou said —
“No.”
“Huh?” Midoriya was taken aback, but Bakugou kept going, as if he couldn’t hear anything he was saying. He kept his gaze on Midoriya, and insisted stubbornly.
“You can’t like him, and you can’t be with him.”
By now, Midoriya was getting angry. Being trapped at his desk with no explanation was uncomfortable enough to begin with, and Bakugou still seemed to have no intention of letting him go.
What gave him the right? Why couldn’t he like Kirishima-kun, and why couldn’t he partner up with him? Just because he was Kacchan’s friend?
“I don’t like you, so you can’t like my friends”… What kind of logic was that?
Well, if Kacchan was going to be so childish, two could play at that game. “Why can’t I?” He shot back, not bothering to mask his annoyance.
That seemed to shake Bakugou out of his detached state, but also send him into a different kind of blank surprise. Midoriya took advantage of Bakugou’s speechlessness and finally stood up from his seat, heading out.
When he passed Bakugou, he kept his head down, eyes fixed on the ground. Biting his lip, his voice came out a breath, a whisper.
“Kacchan, you’re really the worst.”
Nothing was going right.
Bakugou wanted to yell at someone, but there wasn’t anyone for him to take him anger out on. Maybe he should go find Deku. Fucking exactly, he should go find Deku. How dare someone have a crush on him, how dare he have a crush on someone, he’s not allowed…
And he remembered what Deku had said to him, defiant.
“Why can’t I?”
Why couldn’t he?
Why couldn’t Deku be liked by others? What gave him the right to say Deku couldn’t like anyone, either?
Their feelings were mutual, anyways… fuck requited love.
He tore him a new one in his mind. Fucking Deku, getting into Yuuei and wasting time, neglecting studies to date and shit… fucking hell, go do that shit somewhere else. Wait till Aizawa catches you and your parents get called in, and you have to pull an all-nighter writing an apology letter or some shit… The more he thought about it, the angrier he got, and he clenched his teeth hard to squash the itch, the urge to find Deku right now and devour him.
He sat on the stairs in the school building, brooding. He crushed another coke can, the metal crunching in his fist.
“Hey, Bakugou, what’re you doing here?”
He looked up to find Kirishima standing next to him, backpack slung over one shoulder. “What’s been up with you lately? You’ve been really tense.”
Kirishima sat down next to him. “D’you wanna talk about it? We’re friends, right? I’ll listen.”
Bakugou grimaced, irritation still swirling around in his head. Listen to him talk? Talk about what? About how he wanted to rip his crush apart? Sure, and Kirishima would probably go straight to the police.
He ran his fingers through his hair, twisting them in the roots. His hair was bristly and sharp, much like Bakugou himself. The ends poked at his hands a bit, but also spurred him on in a strange way.
Hell, if I’m gonna live with this bullshit, I deserve to understand.
So he asked him, “…Why do you like that person?”
Kirishima was caught off guard. Of all things, he hadn’t expected Bakugou to ask him about his crush. He still felt a bit self-conscious when the topic came up, even when confiding to his close friends. He propped his backpack up on his knees, and touched his hand to his ear nervously. “I mean, why? I guess I could give a lot of reasons. She’s really cute, and has such a bright smile… Gets along with everyone, you know, who wouldn’t like her? It’s natural that I would too.”
Still plagued by his thoughts, Bakugou didn’t follow Kirishima’s answer, despite having asked the question that prompted it. Instead, his mind chose to focus on Kirishima himself, and the sudden wistful expression that had made its way to his face. Kirishima had it bad, really bad.
He probably didn’t know that his feelings were requited.
Requited… All of a sudden, Bakugou started hating the word, an unfathomable ache rising in his chest. He almost wanted to sit through this pain and tell Kirishima what a lucky bastard he was.
The person he liked, liked him back.
He was really fucking lucky.
“But if I were to really pin it down… Well, you know how some people shine really bright?”
Bright?
Bakugou’s thoughts came to a halt.
Deku… was bright?
“We’ve known each other for a pretty long time, actually...”
Known each other for a long time?
Bakugou’s competitive side got the better of him, and his attention swiveled in on that bit. Because nobody, nobody, had known Deku for longer than he had.
Fifteen years… a hundred and eighty months. Five thousand, four hundred and seventy-eight days. All this time, all this time… Deku had followed along behind him.
“…always the center of everyone’s attention, with good reflexes, a cheerful personality, and a powerful quirk. Everyone said that she’d become a great hero in the future.”
If Bakugou was anywhere near his normal state of mind, he would have realized that something crucial was amiss. But Kirishima’s earlier statement still lingered in his thoughts, and he didn’t notice the discrepancy.
Bright.
Did Deku shine bright? Was he like that?
And it was then that Bakugou realized this: to others, Deku was exactly that. They never saw Deku as a kid, a quivering ball of nerves, crying from all the teasing. They never saw Deku in middle school, staring desolately at his hero notes that he thought he would never be able to use.
…They never knew how Deku was rejected and dismissed by every single person around him.
They didn’t even know that Deku used to be quirkless. Everyone thought that he was born with it, the power that let him create powerful winds with a flick of his finger and smash through walls with a swing of his fist, even though using that very power rendered him broken and useless.
They’d only seen him at his best, the most brilliant he ever was. Nobody knew the way he used to cry, helpless, hopeless.
“But that’s not why I like her.
“I guess yeah, afterwards, those became reasons too, but if I had to pin down the moment it started —
“It would probably be back then… she was scared, shaking, and nowhere near as strong as the villain, but she still jumped between the villain and the weak with no hesitation.”
But even when Deku was at his weakest —
— Did he not shine bright?
Why couldn’t anyone like Deku?
Why couldn’t Deku like anyone?
And in a flash of sudden realization, Bakugou had his answer.
Because I chose him.
I like him, so he should like me back.
Kirishima was still talking. He was also a bit red in the face from bringing up his middle school memories. “Wow, liking someone for this reason really does seem kinda cliché, huh? You’re a good friend, Bakugou, so don’t laugh at me, alright?”
Hearing this, Bakugou’s eyes stung a little. He had his answer, but the situation he had gotten himself into was starting to dawn on him. He looked at Kirishima, who was still blissfully clueless, and felt a sudden surge of helplessness.
Good friend… Was he really deserving of this title? Kirishima’s crush was requited, and instead of feeling any happiness for him, he sulked like a petulant child and even tried to interfere, acting on his selfish thoughts…
Was he really deserving of this title, now?
The person you like… I… I’ve —
Have I really been a good friend to you?
A solid minute had passed by the time Bakugou managed to rip his response from his throat, forcing his voice to stay low and level against the heat that threatened to make its way into his words. “You really do like him a lot, don’t you.”
“Yeah…” Kirishima started, then jerked his head around to face Bakugou, bewildered, “…wait a sec. Bakugou, did you say ‘him’?”
“Huh?” Bakugou gaped at him, replaying their conversation in his head. Belatedly, he realized: Kirishima had been talking about a “her” this whole time.
There wasn’t time for him to think, or even control his volume, and his question came out a yell, explosive. “Who the fuck DO you like then?!”
Kirishima, who was just as confused, if not more so, wondered why Bakugou was still asking, after all this time. Didn’t he already know?
Kirishima sensed a huge misunderstanding behind all this, one that had probably taken place somewhere in the past few days, but at the same time, he had a feeling that now wasn’t the time to ask. So without any other choice, he fumbled past his embarrassment and gave Bakugou his answer. “Ashido…? Y’know, Ashido… Mina?”
Bakugou stood up so suddenly he sent his empty soda can flying, and he paid it no attention as it rolled and clattered down the stairs, no attention at all —
“Wait… Bakugou, where’re you going?!”
Without sparing even a backwards glance, he shouted back, his answer echoing down the hallway. “To tell someone about my fucking FEELINGS for them!”
Kirishima was taken by surprise, but he focused quickly on the important part: “Wait, who is it?”
— Who?
The one I grew up with —
The one different from everyone else —
Puffy hair, soft cheeks, big eyes, and a bright smile —
The one I’ve been so hung up on for all these years —
“— DEKU!”
Whoa.
Bakugou likes Midoriya.
I didn’t even know he was gay.
Kirishima looked at Bakugou, who was walking resolutely away, and marvelled at his manly, go-getter way of doing things. Still, he couldn’t help but muse:
“It’s a tough road to take, Bakugou, so good luck.”
In the end, Bakugou was caught “dating and shit” by Aizawa, had his parents called in, and handed in a ten-page apology letter… but all this was months later.