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The sun was warm that afternoon. It had been slowly slipping down the horizon as Shigeo sat there on the hill, it’s warm rays shifting through the cirrus clouds as they passed by lazily in the breeze. The warmth had been giving way gradually to something more of a dim cool, a temperature only late spring could produce. He’d been sitting there on the grassy hillside for quite some time. It was the first time in a while he’d elected to take a Friday afternoon off to run its course. Naturally, he took the chance to engage in one of his favorite pastimes, watching the sky; he took the change of the color in hour by hour. At the start, when he’d first arrived at the hill, the sky had been a supple blue, changing hues bit by bit with the passing time. It was now approaching evening, and it had begun to take on a slight tint of orange as the sun continued to pass into rest.
Shigeo closed his eyes and took a deep breath. There was something particularly enjoyable about sitting and watching the sky by himself. The occasional passerby and the gentle sounds of the canal in front of him were the only noises to disturb him for some time. Enjoyable as it was, however, it also was rather lonely. He took a quick glance at his phone and felt a bit of warmth rush to his face, biting his lip as his eyes turned back to the canal, whose surface reflected the sky quite abstractly.
He took in the view curiously, studying the rippled clouds and the occasional shadow of a bird on the multicolored surface of the canal. There were a few tones in the water, unlike the sky, that made him think of other things, and he could feel the inkling of an empty, nagging feeling in his chest. Hanazawa…the single word slipped casually into his mind, and he once again took an anxious glance at his phone. His right hand, the one closest to it, had somewhat of a nervous fit before closing to grip the grass, and he fell back onto the warm earth, letting the blades tickle his neck. He could tell that he was red, so he covered his face with his arm out of habit and lay there silently, pulling at the grass he clenched tightly in his right palm. School had kept them both quite busy lately and they had been seeing less of each other. He could tell the empty feeling inside of him was a sad one, and sighed softly. I wonder…he thought, sliding his palm across the grass, inching it closer and closer to his phone, which lay quiet next to his bag. I wonder if he’s free today…
He willed himself to sit back up and quietly thumbed through his contacts. Should I call him? Or is that too forward, he thought finally reaching the one that read his friend’s name. He tapped on the call button lightly a few times without pressing it completely, all while there was another feeling welling up in his stomach…am i..nervous? He scrunched his face a bit. Why am I nervous…it isn’t like he wouldn’t want to talk to me…but he’s usually the one who calls- the string of thoughts was suddenly interrupted by a familiar sound.
“Kageyama-kun? Is that you?” when the first note of the playful voice struck him he nearly threw his phone directly into the canal out of shock. Quickly, he turned to face the top of the hill and saw Teruki walking toward him. He was wearing a tracksuit and had his hair drawn back out of his face in a tight updo. It was clear he’d been on a run, or at least a brisk walk, before finding Shigeo sitting on the hill; the dampness of his skin shone brightly in the light of the slowly setting sun. “Aren’t you a little far from home?” there was a gentle smile on his face, the one he reserved only for Shigeo. At the sight of it, all Shigeo could do was quickly turn away; he could once again feel warmth flooding to his face. Ah…this is why I was nervous…
It took a little while, but Shigeo finally and quietly responded, “I took the afternoon off today. I just went wherever felt the nicest to relax…” now that he thought about it, this canal was only a five-minute walk from Teruki’s house, although he had not intended to be so close on purpose. He could feel Teruki’s presence come in contact with his own as he sat next to him on the grass. He still did not turn to face him, instead fidgeting awkwardly with his phone charm, one that had been given to him, incidentally, by Teruki. After a few moments, he heard Teruki chuckle softly, and shift a bit closer to him. He could feel his heart rate rise a little.
“Well, it is certainly a nice place to relax.” Teruki took a sharp inhale and flopped back onto the grass, laughing again. “And it is a beautiful evening.”Shigeo couldn’t help but turn to face him, even against his better judgment. There was simply something magnetic about his presence, even as he lay still, close eyed in the grass, breathing in sync with the sounds of the canal.
Shigeo recalled the last time they had been together, teru had caught sight of him after school and walked him home, even though it was slightly out of his way, he’d told shigeo that he didn’t mind. Shigeo had felt it then too, something inviting about the way he smiled, the intent way he listened to him while he spoke and caught him up on the happenings of his life. It was before then that shigeo had acknowledged this feeling, but it was that time when he began to realize fully what it meant.
Teruki opened his eyes and shifted his view toward Shigeo, who had been watching him unwaveringly while he pondered. He smiled again and let out a gentle, “what?” shigeo snapped back to face the canal when he realized what he’d been doing. There was a wave of unease in his gut.
“Sorry. I wasn’t trying to stare I-” again he was interrupted, but this time by a hand that gently cupped his face and turned it to where teruki was again sitting beside him. He was a bit surprised, but no matter how much his timid instinct told him to pull away, he found himself unable to. His eyes searched Teruki’s face, and there seemed to be as much wonderment in his eyes as he felt in his own.
There were a few moments of nothing but silence as they stared, near unblinking into each other’s faces, curious and apprehensive all at once. Then, suddenly, shigeo felt himself leaning his face into the hand that lightly cupped it, letting its warmth seep into his skin, comfort filling the empty pit in his chest that had existed mere moments before. The hand pulled him into an embrace, and he felt it slide to the back of his neck. Another arm slid around his waist and held him firmly, and he let himself melt into Teruki’s form. The sunlight continued to inch slowly off of them as they sat intermingled in each other’s presences.
“I’m the one who should be apologizing.” said teruki, running his fingers tenderly through Shigeo’s hair.
Shigeo pulled his head away from Teruki’s chest slightly so that he could look at him, “you don’t have to apologize, we’ve both been busy.”
“Well, i am sorry about that, but…well i…i wanted to tell you about how i’ve felt for so long…i just…it’s hard.”
“Oh!” shigeo let out a small giggle, “that’s what you meant.” he continued to laugh as he let himself sink back into Teruki’s embrace.
“Are you ready to go? I’ll walk you back home.” they were both at the top of the hill and the last few minutes of daylight were upon them. Shigeo was trying to remove a rock from his shoe, while teru was letting his hair down. The two of them, having stood and prepared to leave the hillside, felt called to linger for just a few more minutes.
“I’ll be ready once i can see the sun set. That’s what i came here for in the first place anyway.” said shigeo, sliding his shoe back onto his foot.
“I thought you said you came here to relax,” teruki teased, and took hold of one of Shigeo’s hands, carefully interlocking his fingers with Shigeo’s own.
“I did.” Shigeo smiled at him and Teruki’s face flushed with color. They stood there, hands intertwined watching the last few rays of sunshine fade behind the clouds, then began to walk home.