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Stubborn Expectations

Summary:

Excessive drink leads Sanji to conversation with his brothers.

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Sanji’s bucks night had been heavy with silence since his brothers had settled in with him to drink. Only the shuffle of cloth on cloth as someone moved to refill their glass. There had been a modicum of interaction a short time ago, ended by the incident with the servant girl. They had stewed in sticky silence ever since. 

Sanji had moved a chair by the window to get away from his brothers, undoubtably there to make sure he did nothing stupid like run away last minute, and stared pensively into the night more inebriated than he’d been since Whisky Peak. He could see them watching him drink from the corner of his eye.

“Luffy’s still out there.” Sanji’s lips quirked when he heard them startle, obviously they hadn’t expected him to say anything to them. They observed him carefully to glean the reason why, with the alcoholic flush to his cheeks they came to a conclusion. He was too drunk to hold it in.

“If it makes you feel better to think that.” Ichiji said and gulped down his wine, tone shutting down any further comment. Sanji smiled, shook his head and laughed softly, slopping his own wine over the upholstery.

“He’s there. He’s waiting for me.”

They were struck silent for a moment but the smile. Never having seen one on a brothers face that wasn’t vicious and blood thirsty.

“Why would he bother? You’re not going back with him.” Yonji snapped, prompting another laugh from Sanji.

“You think so?” He said, mirth colouring his words. “You haven’t been paying much attention to us if you think that.”

He threw back the remainder of his wine and rocked up to his feet, still chuckling to himself as he approached them. It was as if he were in on a joke they didn’t understand and it infuriated them to see him so carefree with such a heavy weight around his neck. Sanji snagged an unopened bottle of wine and uncorked it with his teeth, manners drowned under hours of alcoholism.

“I’ll bet you anything he’s still standing there.” Sanji said, looking between his cup and the bottle. He threw the cup away without a care, almost hitting Niji had he not leaned out of its way. The cup clattered across the floor, rolling to a stop against the wall. By then Sanji had drooped over the couch in a manner suggesting he couldn’t hold himself straight and was drinking straight from the bottle. In silence. With his ever infuriating smile. A small laugh escaping him now and then. But thankfully no more conversation they thought.

Until he yanked himself upright and peered around the room at them, swaying slightly in the effort to remain upright. His bottle slid out of his grasp and hit the ground, spinning on its bottom precariously before settling without a spill.

“I feel sorry for all of you.”

Identical huffs of amusement came from the brothers.

“We’re not the ones trapped here forever.” Niji said, eyes on Sanji as he flopped back down across the couch and made himself comfortable.

“I know, that’s me. But you all miss out on so much of life cause of Judge. I’m glad for whatever stopped the experiments working on me.”

“What- are you talking about feelings? They’re an inconvenience of life.” Ichiji stated, with the complete seriousness of one indoctrinated to the core of their being.

Sanji laughed at them again, genuinely amused and equally dismissive of the words as he waved them away like they were an annoying fly.

“That’s just what he told you, but how would you know? My feelings got me out of Germa. They gave me Zeff and the guys at the Baratie. They gave me my faith in Luffy and my crew. My drive to pursue cooking and the All Blue. I couldn’t even imagine not being able to feel. How do you find meaning in your lives?”

“Life doesn’t need meaning.” Yonji snapped, heated in a way foreign to him.

“Then you’re not truly living at all are you?” Sanji replied, as whimsical as ever in his drunken introspection. “You’re soldiers for Germa. Replaceable in every sense of the word. There’s nothing that makes any of you truly unique from each other. There’s no goals or dreams outside of daddy’s orders...” He trailed off, words far more bitter than when he’d begun.

“Ha, screw that. Screw this. I’d rather die than be stuck under his thumb forever.”

Silence reigned again. The automaton trio feeling out of place in their brothers company without his eternal brighter disposition.

“It’s too late to make that decision now Sanji. You’re already here.” Ichiji said softly.

And Sanji was laughing again. It made them wonder if all emotion afflicted beings seesawed between highs and lows as their brother was and how any such being could function.

“Not for long. If you think Luffy will leave without me then you’re dead wrong. Even if I’m married by the time he gets to me, it’s just one more person along for the ride. And who knows how many of the others are running around unnoticed right now.”

If that wasn’t an ominous statement to pass out on then Sanji’s brothers had never heard an ominous innocuous statement in their lives, of which they’d heard many. On considering his words as he began to snore, they realised how locust like the Strawhats were. They arrived in a place, dysfunctional and corrupt as any other in the world but put together and functioning and demolished the infrastructure and obliterated the hierarchy and then they were in the wind. Their captain was a walking calamity inviting chaos and destruction into his life with a laugh and a grin and he was stubbornly awaiting their failed brother in Big Mom’s front yard under threat of starvation.

Perhaps, Yonji thought, they should be more than worried about their presence. But the crew was new to the New World, weak and certainly not yet able to triumph over Germa let alone Big Mom. Everything would go to plan. Everything would be perfectly fine.