Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

     The laws that governs the actions of an guardian angel, regulations that they abide by, and guidelines on their behavior were SIMPLE yet...Bang Chan was able to just fuck them all up for two boys -- they all thought he was capable of handling TWO at once, after all, their destinies were intertwined so it wouldn’t be hard for him to look after TWO of them..

     He stood before the Council of Angels, scrutinized by his peers. Most would be fearful of what may happen, the verdict that may be passed down (he would know, after all, as he used to be seated amongst the others). Disciplinary action, suspensions, and worse, expulsion . Yet, he feared none of these punishments, he refuses to cower and bow his head, whimper and beg for forgiveness. No, he refuses to fall in line just because he fell in love .

     Unbowing, Chan stands before the Council, head held high as he waits for the speaker to start listing his crimes .

In a booming voice, echoing through the hall, a quiet HUSH runs through the crowd. The trial of Bang Chan has begun.

“ Thou shall not intervene with the lives of your charge unless they have deviated from their destined path . ”

Chan had constantly intervened in the life of his charges; it was normal for an angel to hold the hand of their charge when they were young (when they were a toddler and didn’t know better)...but Chan had constantly intervened in his charges’ life, changing destinies so that good things result from their actions, going beyond gentle nudges and divine signs. His love for them soared beyond that of a guardian angel...his love ran deep, not because they were God’s creation, but because they were his precious humans, he wanted the BEST for them.

“ How do you plead to having broken this law ?? ”

Chan stares back, unwavering, in a clear voice, “ NOT guilty, ” he states. A wave of murmurs goes through the crowd, he ignores it.

“ Thou shall not appear before your charge’s eyes -- physical or ethereal -- unless it is the end of their life’s term, only then shall you appear to guide them into the promised land. ”

Chan has appeared to them in their dreams, passed them on the streets, and even having spoken to them, albeit very briefly. This was taboo, though, Chan believes he has broken no rules, as he had not REVEALED who he was to them, nor did he ever appear in his true form.

“ How do you plead to having broken this law ?? ”

Again with a firm tone, unbending, “ Not. Guilty, ” he declares, he knows what’s going to happen. He hasn’t been a part of the angelic world for as long as many, but he has seen one expulsion in his lifetime...he watched the gruesomeness of what happens, angels were BEAUTIFUL as they were cruel (especially to that of their own).

“ Thou shall not intervene with the life of another human under the watch of your brethren. Even if it may affect the life of your charge. This is the destiny they have. ”

Multiple times, out of pure jealousy, Chan had purposefully redirected the boys elsewhere just so they would never meet certain people again. He’s kept them safe from dangers by influencing them to choose the detour home one night, hence affecting the destiny of the mugger they were to meet and whoever fell victim to said thief in the pair’s stead; he’s gotten them to NEVER call back a potential partner by making sure the number they had gotten were lost in the washing machine (all because he caught a glimpse of his brother’s charge’s Book of Destiny, he saw it would end in heartache and in pain, he wanted his boys to be HAPPY so he stepped in when he shouldn’t have).

“ How do you plead to having broken this law ?? ”

This was going on way too long for his liking but he knew interrupting would have this go on much longer than it usually was. Chan was prepared for the lengthy ‘ interrogation ’ but it was much different than sitting in the bench than be before the scrutiny of many.

He holds back a heavy sigh, holds back the sarcastic retort hanging on his lips -- he’s learned all of the human’s bad habits, having spent too much time amongst them; he no longer glows as brightly as before, nor did he sound as angelic as he used to. “ Not guilty, ” he responds, another wave of murmur. Chan knew if he pleads guilty, show remorse, his sentence would be LIGHTER but he was unremorseful for what he did. Everything he did was for his charges, the boys that come to worm their way into his heart without them ever knowing.

He sees the look of disapproval swimming on the faces of his judges, the disgust amongst some of his peers and surprise in others. Chan knew he was going to be made an example of. Good was the only thing his mind came up with, Chan has always been used as an example -- the perfect guardian angel, the best there was...now, he was going to be made an example of what happens to those that disobey and break all the laws.

“ Thou shall not interfere with the task given to another of your kin, even if it would affect that of your own charge...this is the destiny determined for both parties. ”

Chan’s mind recalls the time someone had come to ask him for help, unsure of what to do as they knew that Chan’s two wards’ lives would be affected. They showed him their own ward’s Book of Destiny (despite how forbidden it was), their task was to follow through with how the Book dictates, yet Chan made the ultimate decision to advise them AGAINST following it for the sake of his own wards.

He recalls the time he had hidden someone else’s Book for the sake of interfering, knowing if they had it, they would argue with him and force him to follow what he was supposed to do. Chan keeps silent over the fact that he had THROWN the ones he was given away (or rather, hidden...throwing it away may cause his charges to become LOST in life; he wishes he was able to write in them and change things in the future but he is unable to see the future through the book; he is only capable of seeing what happens seconds before it does then given the command of what he should DO).

“ How do you plead to have broken this law ?? ”

At this point, Chan would have figured they were smarter, that the Council would just stop asking this particular question, knowing how he was going to answer. With his streak of not guilty , of course, his reply would remain the same, but this particular one...if he was to be honest as he’s sworn to have done so, he would have to plead, “ Guilty, ” he declares loudly and this elicits sharp gasps.

He spots the anxious looks between members of his brethren; his eyes focuses on the one he had trespassed upon, spotting the look of betrayal yet no guilt appeared on Chan’s face. He does not regret having done what he did, he did what he felt -- angels are not supposed to think or feel, they don’t have autonomous thought -- was right for his two humans.

“ Thou must be loyal and dedicated to your holy coven. ”

The second thing he learned when he was born into the role of a guardian angel was those of his heavenly brethren was to be priority above his humans, the Council above his brethren and God above all. Learned that his LIFE was to be dedicated to his ‘ craft ’ and to not stray from his path (such that he may be corrupted by those residing in Hell). That he was to answer the call for help when asked, that he must dedicate his entire being to being a guardian and to be at the service of his Creator and of his coven.

“ How do you plead to the trespass of your brethren’s trust, dedication and loyalty ?? ”

Chan shrugs, “ Guilty, ” he replies, he’s broken everything for his boys. He’d do anything for his boys, even if it meant that he had to resort to darker tactics to ensure the best outcomes for them. He wasn’t going to LIE about this one, there was no point. He can’t say he’s remained loyal, and pliant. He has dedicated his life to being a guardian, yet he figures the Council would overlook this tiny positivity as the negative prosecutions outweighed the entirety of the law.

“ Thou shall always be honest, truthful, and obedient. ”

Chan was honest with everyone, of course, he does CUSHION his words to not hurt other people but he was honest and earnest. He was not the type to lie (and he wasn’t about to begin now), Chan was straightforward with his words and ‘ opinion ’ (if he could even call it that).

In truthfulness, perhaps he had not been very truthful in his reports to his superior and to the Council, having lied of where he was and what he was doing when he did not answer the calls to be summoned before them in a timely manner. Chan lies about the deviation of his humans so he may spend more time with them. The Commandment that was passed down from God, to them, to the humans flashes into Chan’s mind ( thou shall not bear false witness -- too late for that).

Obedience, this was the FIRST thing he learned. To obey what he was told and not to question -- he learned that this was slavery, that it demanded him to be a mindless doll to be manipulated. He’s always believed that what he’s told is the truth, until he was exposed to something different, something that went against what he was taught. Angels have always seen humans as frail objects, people that require help from the Divine, yet having experienced it for himself and observing for long periods of time, Chan believes that humans are different . They aren’t what angels were told they were; they were resilient, intelligence and free-thinking...ah… Free-thinking .

His mind flashes to an unspoken law -- thou shall not corrupt the minds of others nor your own with forbidden knowledge . This was what it meant. Free thought, to think for himself and to feel for himself...Perhaps this was why God had persecuted the first humans on Earth...The apple bitten was the apple of wisdom and knowledge , powerful enough for them to question what they were told.

“ How do you plead to having broken this law ?? ”

“ If you wished for me to plead guilty to your non-existent charges with hopes that I would recognize my wrongs, I am sad to inform you that this would not be the time where I feel remorse nor regret, ” Chan finally speaks, breaking the silence, refusing to bow still. He was growing much tired of this so-called trial (more like just for the Council to set an example), he just wishes for them to get to the verdict and his expulsion from the Heavens -- he was sure this was what was going to happen, he’s observed enough, read enough...Chan was an anomaly that went undetected for years, a budding blossom the angels had not snipped to prevent his growth and instead, promoted it by exposing him to more by giving him more .

“ How do you plead ?? ” the Speaker asks again.

A roll of his eyes, “  Guilty on all accounts, ” he spits, well, at least he’s learned new TERMS while on Earth...Watching a little too much t.v. with his wards and he learned how they TALK on t.v. -- magical thing, that...a box that seems to transmit images and sound, much like telepathy !!

“ You must not change the destiny of your charges, no matter how much you wish to. You are to ensure they remain on the path God has set them on and follow through. ”

Change the destiny of the two boys...Yeah, he’s done just that. He’s made sure their lives remained intertwined with one another, never separate, yet not because he was SELFISH and wished for them to remain together...Rather, he knew they made each other happy and if they were happy, he was. He changed the destiny of their lives by making more victories than losses for them, just so they wouldn’t starve…

There was much he has done that affects their lives and their futures, he regrets none of his choices. This was LOVE, if he may call it that, the so-called, self-proclaimed LOVE he was supposed to have for humans; if angels truly loved their wards, why would they follow the Book and let them suffer? Why would they not try to change the fate of their charges’ lives to make it better?

Simple -- obey. Don’t question, just obey . Like how the Book of Destiny governs that of the human, it also governs the angel themselves.

“ How do you-- ”

Chan boldly interrupts, “ Guilty, ” he states, “ I do not regret what I have done, I do not feel remorse for what I did and will do. You all claim to LOVE your charges, yet you willingly watch them SUFFER because your BOOK told you that it was meant to be. You watch them go through pain and suffering, do you not hurt when you see that? You say you LOVE your charges, yet with blind trust and willingness, you put them through troubling times they may never recover from. ” his voice booms in the forum, eyes looking around -- accusatory, steely, and feral.

“ How many of you lost your charges to Hell because they took their own lives ?? You may lie to yourself and others, but you cannot lie to me, and I will not lie to you, for I am telling you...You are the cause and reason why your charge has ended up in Hell instead of here, in Paradise. ”

“ SILENCE !! ”

Chan’s eyes flickers back to the front of the hall, “ You all accuse me of going beyond what I am told to do, for not following the assigned Book of Destiny, that I do not LOVE my wards...that is where you are wrong. I did what I did out of LOVE for them, I refuse to be told otherwise. ” he declares, “ and i refuse to be silenced , ” he scowls.

The Court falls into a hush, a stand-off between a rebellious angel (too far to be saved) and a Council (bound in olden ways). Chan doesn’t bow, he doesn’t bend; he refuses to fall victim to begging for his life.

“ It would seem that there would be no need for discussion on what should be done as you have proven an unwillingness to learn nor cooperate, an inability to be remorseful nor reflect. In light of your pleas, in light of what was observed, ” -- a heavy pause, Chan waits patiently for the verdict, he knows what it is, he’s prepared for it. He hears heavy footsteps into the room, this is different, he’s never heard those steps before; he wants to look but he doesn’t, wanting to keep his eye contact with those of the Council.

He feels something grab his wings, an iron grip on the feathered appendages sprouting from his back. Glorious, luxurious and pure -- something he’s accumulated over decades of experience.

“ We, the Council -- speaking in lieu of our Creator -- pass the verdict of GUILTY to the accused. We thereby sentence the accused to be EXPELLED from the Court of Angels,”

There it is, the verdict he was waiting for. A smugness seems to settle over Chan’s mind, until the next sentence was set down.

“ In addition to his guilt and trespass, we, the Council, believe there requires a heavier punishment. Therefore, we sentence the accused to have his WINGS torn and be sent down to Earth to live amongst the humans until he wishes to REPENT for his sins. ”

Almost on cue, he feels the grip on his wings tighten and blinding PAIN sears through his back as his white wings were torn from his back with no warning, no preparation....he hears screeches of terror and screams of fear from the crowd but it’s dampened to his ringing ears. His eyes falls to the feathers scattered on the floor, no longer white but stained RED (ah...so angels do bleed …).

The last thing he hears was “ The Council has adjourned, ” before blackness fills his mind, in blurry daze, he watches his wings be tossed in front of him -- he’s become one of the FALLEN .