Chapter Text
Honestly, it was a very scary view and an electrifying thought.
You were standing behind the General and the two main scientists to watch the progress of the operation. It was one more of the few attempts to open the portal and everyone was looking forward to seeing the results.
The machine was turned on and the blue lighting it was emanating announcing it was working, that was a very good signal, it made Alexei’s smile grow as he watched the process.
But the machine didn’t show stability and, in a flash, it exploded.
Those men... They... They died?
You could see how confusing the situation was and how Alexei’s smile fell at the view. It was not supposed to be like that. He quietly followed the comrades down the stairs to see the results of the failed experiment. Several men were on the floor, their corpses still in flames.
The General did not look satisfied with the progress (could it really be called progress?) and his guard lifted one of the scientists by his neck, slowly choking him to death. Alexei was as paralyzed with fear as you were, but you both knew better than to try to do something.
- You have one year – he told Alexei, who nodded obediently, and then left the room.
He was tense, it was obvious. Being now the head of the operation meant that he could not make any mistakes or he would end up like... His old friend, who was now lying dead on the floor.
You went down the stairs as careful as you could, quickly reaching out to him. He did not need to turn to know it was you who placed a hand on his shoulders. You could feel his body trembling and how strained his muscles were.
- What am I going to do? - He said in a low voice
- Don’t worry, I’m here with you – you said, and he grabbed your hand – We can do it.
. . . . .
A year passed and thankfully the team, now with Alexei being the leader, made more progress than expected. The key was working successfully and the portal was being held open by it.
You could not be happier with the situation. If everything was working well it meant that the General would do nothing to harm the scientists and eventually they could go back home, and there is nothing you want more than go back home and explore your new relationship with Alexei.
You met him when you were called by the government to work on an experiment. Alexei was a fascinating scientist and the best to work with, he was so brilliant it was mesmerizing and soon he conquered a soft spot in your heart.
The experiment you were working on was a to build some kind of key to another world – a parallel world, as they told you – and at first it was failing miserably, when a “fragile spot” was located in a city in America, the team was immediately transferred to start the experiment again.
And it went very good, the “portal” was being opened like planned and everything was going well, but you didn’t fail to notice that Alexei was being a little distant whenever you talked about the situation. It was starting to worry you.
You were now staring at the marvelous view of the portal being held open, the excitement was running fast inside your veins just at the thought of seeing what this parallel world would look like. That is a scientific miracle and everyone was enthusiastic about it.
With the very exception of Alexei.
- Beautiful, isn’t it? - One of the comrades spoke, Alexei just nodded, his expression still apathetic.
You were starting to get worried. How was he not happy about it?
- Alexei? - You called him and took his hand – Is everything alright?
He looked at you like he didn’t know you were there – I'm okay... I’m just tired – He squeezed your hand. You frowned and he smiled and gently lifted your hand to kiss it.
You almost believed him.
. . . . .
Alexei was a very joyful man, he was always smiling or telling jokes, holding your hand and showering you with compliments like you were the most important thing in the world for him. You find yourself melting whenever he is around and this feeling was mutual, it couldn’t be better.
But he was acting strange lately, he was no longer sneaking into your dorm to kiss you goodnight or giving you surprise hugs when you were working alone. He was slowly isolating himself. You thought that maybe he was just tired because of his work and you gave him space, you didn’t want him feeling bad about it, after all, this experiment was way more important than you, if anything goes wrong, the General would probably kill Alexei, and it was the last thing you wanted.
However, in the course of time, everything was going considerably fine. The machine was working, the portal was opened, the General was happy and Alexei was still acting weird. You were starting to think that maybe it was your fault. Did you miss something? What have you done that makes that adorable man act like he wasn’t in love with you like he once was?
You knew him well enough to think that maybe he didn’t have the courage to make the first move, despite his cheerful personality, he was a shy man and sometimes it made him anxious, maybe he wanted to talk to you but he felt bad?
As you walked towards his lab you felt a knot forming inside your throat. What if he was really getting tired of you? Does he want to break up with you? You shook your head at the intrusive thoughts, you couldn’t assume the worse but you had to be prepared for it. You had to do it.
You knocked the door.
- Alexei? - You called him – Can I come in?
There was a small hesitation inside the room, you felt it – Yes, yes – You heard footsteps and then he opened the door and let you in – Sorry I... I wasn’t expecting you, I thought you were sleeping.
- I really couldn’t - You said, sitting on one the chairs and trying to think about something, anything, to say.
- Me neither - He responded and sat on the chair beside you and smiled weakly.
- Is there something wrong? Are you okay? - You asked. You could see he tensed again.
- I’m okay – He forced a smile and got up – I finished those papers and was going to sleep.
- Alexei? - You said a little louder than expected. He seemed to notice because, when he heard that, he started to stare at the wall – Why are you lying to me?
You almost could feel his heartbeat stopping when you said that. His body went cold.
He couldn’t hide it from you anymore.
- I... - He started, like he didn’t know what to say – I...
- I noticed that you were a little distant lately. I didn’t want to make you upset but... It’s been like this for weeks and I thought... Was it something I did? - It sounded like a whisper, but you were certain he heard it because he looked at you like you had just slapped him.
- What? No! - He shook his head – No, no, no, no, no... This is not... I’m sorry...
- Then what is this? Why are you like this? – Now you were starting to get anxious.
He sighed in defeat and looked at you. You wondered how you didn’t notice his reddish eyes before. He was crying.
You got up and walked towards him slowly as you studied his expression. He looked so tired and vulnerable, his hands were shaking and you noticed that he was holding his breath.
You grabbed his hand and held it with both of your hands while looking at him in the eyes. Carefully you guided him to sit again on the chairs, but you stopped halfway when you heard a sob. He busted in tears and refused to look at you.
- Alexei? Please talk to me... I’m here for you, remember?
- I... I can’t... - He said between his shaky breaths
- You don’t want to talk about it? - He shook his head - You don’t have, okay? Just tell me when you feel ready.
It calmed him down, his hands stopped shaking and he slowly pulled you into a messy hug. You fondly stroked his back until his breath was stable again.
- I’m sorry... I’m so sorry – he said with his head on your shoulder.
- It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize – You lifted his head touched his forehead with yours – You look tired, let’s go to sleep.
He nodded and smiled. You closed the lab and guided him to his dorm. When you got there, you helped him undress until he was only in his underwear and guided him to lie on his bed. You kissed his nose and got up, but he reached to you and grabbed your hand.
- Stay.
You smiled and kissed the knuckles of his hand, and then you undressed too and lay on the bed next to him. It was a small bed, but you two didn’t care about it.
You heard another sob, and he was crying again.
It was painful to see that and not be able to know how to make him feel better, you didn’t want to pressure him and make things worse but seeing him so miserable made your heartache.
You grabbed his head and wiped the tears off his cheeks. He gave you a sad smile and tried to calm his breath, but failed. You never saw him like that. What kind of horrible thing in the world could have done this to him?
But it didn’t matter, because right now he needed the comfort of your arms, he needed to know everything was okay.
He closed his eyes and leaned on your hands almost desperately like it was the only thing keeping him alive, a new stream of fresh tears were coming out of his eyes as you patiently waited for him to calm down.
You hugged him close to your chest and he wrapped his arms around you again. He pulled you as close to his body as he could and embraced you in his arms. His trembling hands reached your back and his head rested on your shoulder.
You didn’t know for how long you two were like that when he fell asleep, and soon you were sleeping too.