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English
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Published:
2019-08-10
Updated:
2021-09-27
Words:
7,344
Chapters:
17/?
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114
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Spoken Rules Accepted by the Operators of Team Rainbow in Hereford Base

Summary:

Rules ever agreed by everyone not to do ever again. Period.

Notes:

A collection of rules based on headcanons and ideas from @r6shippingdelivery and @grain-chain -drain on Tumblr and some of my fanfics here. Sorry, I am not active as I used to on Tumblr, it's just that my phone decided to be a bitch by being broken so I have to send it for repairs until tomorrow.

The list here can be added by your suggestions, just say it out in the comments and I will add it up here. I f you want to use some of them as fanfic prompts be my guest, just tag me first.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: First Base

Chapter Text

  1. Do. Not. Flirt. With. Rook. In. Front. Of. Doc! We do not want to repeat ‘The Baguette’ incident.
  2. If you can’t cook to save a life, stay the fuck away from the kitchen.
  3. As much as most of us wanted to, the tank is not a car you can use for a joyride.
  4. Do not steal other people’s lunches. You don’t know if some of them are the decoys laced with laxatives.
  5. Smoke is not allowed to let the darn crow roam freely unless you want your shiny valuables ended up with Rook.
  6. Mozzie is not allowed to use his pets snake and arachnids for ‘shits and giggles’.
  7. Gridlock is FOREVER banned for ever bringing her pet rooster here again.
  8. Do not call Nokk La Llorona. She will fuck you up. Psychologically.
  9. You want good food; ask Maestro, Castle, Hibana or Glaz (if he wants to). You want to get your devices fixed, ask Twitch. You want coupons, ask Blitz. You want booze, ask the Lord Tachanka. You want to get groceries done at cheap prices, ask Thatcher. You want someone to babysit your pet, ask Rook and Thermite. You want blackmail info, ask Dokkaebi (but bribe her first so she does not have any backup for leverage). But if you want lubes and condoms of different varieties, ask Doc.
  10. Don’t get intimidated/scared/threatened when Kapkan gives you a dead animal. It’s how he says he likes or appreciates you. Just, make sure Rook’s not there.
  11. Buck will kill you if you mess with Frost.
  12. You make Rook cry, the whole GIGN will come and get you.
  13. Keep the sex volume as low as possible. This is not a brothel.
  14. Knock first before entering Doc’s office – or any room – what you end up seeing is your responsibility.
  15. Never talk about fathers in front of the Bozak sisters. It took a shit long time to get them back along.
  16. Bandit is forbidden to enter the garage alone. Get your own car batteries, you cheapskate.
  17. Maverick’s blowtorch is not a suitable lighter at all. Ask everyone involved in the ‘4th July Fire’ incident.
  18. Never use Capitao’s crossbow and Smoke’s poison gas grenades together.
  19. If you wanna do something stupid, at least let Doc already has his first three cups of coffee for the day.
  20. Twitch and Mozzie, stop with the early morning yelling feuds already! Do you want that fucking rooster to be back here!?
  21. Can someone keep an eye on Vigil and Lesion when they are both drinking together?
  22. Don’t mess with Maestro’s cooking. The ‘Siracha Balls’ incident is a good example if you do.
  23. If you see either Ying or Clash or Caviera fighting together at the same time, turn away. Same goes with Kapkan and Glaz.
  24. Any full – scale food fights/paintball wars/parties/prank wars etc. are excusable if it ONLY happens on April 1st or at holiday celebrations. Any other day you will be reported for disciplinary actions. (We are all looking at you, Bandit).
  25. Warden’s suits are not cheap, you are in charge of the dry cleaning or repairs if you do so.
  26. Smoke, enough with that fucking cat song at 3 am.
  27. It is highly unadvisable to play the Russian anthem when Tachanka is at the opposite team.
  28. Don’t even think about making Sledge’s kilt fly like Marilyn Monroe. Bandit and a reluctant Echo learnt it the hard way.
  29. Mistletoes are meant for kissing for the holidays, not a starter for a fuckfest nor a fistfight.
  30. Always call Mira if her husband Tachanka does/about to do something stupid.
  31. Do not mock both the Senaviev – Alvarez pair. The married couple could fuck you up badly, even without the back-up from the other Spetznaz and Jackal.
  32. Start fights with Lion and you will end up face-to-face with Montagne. He’s only meant to fight with Doc.

*This list of rules gets longer in time. Whatever bullshit happens it might be added here.*

 

Agreed and Decreed with by Six’s reluctance,

                                                (M.BKR)                                                                                                                      (  جلال الفاسي)

                                       (Mike ’Thatcher’ Baker)                                                                                                   (Jalal ‘Kaid’ al-Fassi)

                                      Commanding Leader of                                                                                                 Commanding Leader of

                                     Attacker Team of Rainbow                                                                                            Defender Team of Rainbow     

 

(if you got any other ideas, type it out in the comments below)