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Language:
English
Series:
Part 3 of DBH one-shots
Stats:
Published:
2019-08-15
Words:
1,092
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
10
Kudos:
169
Bookmarks:
12
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1,182

Lordy Lordy

Summary:

A short, fluffy thing in honor of Connor’s birthday.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

“Connor.”

Proximity alert

Someone was sitting behind him at the edge of the bed, gently shaking his shoulder. 

Loading OS…

Date: Friday, 15 August 2042

Time: 23:52 PM

Total Stasis Period: 01:28:12

Initializing…

“Hey, Connor. Come on, I’ve got like three minutes to do this.”

He made an irritated noise, turned further into the pillow and away from the voice. Gavin laughed softly, leaned over Connor’s shoulder to place a hand on the mattress. The android’s eyes were closed, his brows drawn down in a sleepy pout. It was unreasonably cute. Illegally cute. Class 3 Felony Adorableness. 

Gavin bent down and kissed Connor’s temple. “I know you’re awake, your LED’s blue. You can’t fool me, I’m a detective.”

Connor groaned again, and flopped onto his back, nose to nose with his annoyingly peppy boyfriend. “And you couldn’t detect that I was sleeping?”

“In my defense,” Gavin said, as he sat back, “I figured you’d all still be partying.”

After a full-body stretch Connor sat up, sheets pooling around his hips as he scooted backwards to lean against the headboard. “We would be, if Nines and Tina hadn’t gotten a call in the middle of Taboo. Which is fine, because they were winning.”

“Never let them pair up, you know that,” Gavin chided. “I’ve never met two more competitive assholes in my life. Party games only make them more powerful.”

“Well, you weren’t there to break up the dynamic duo,” Connor replied, shrugging. 

“Sorry I missed your party, babe.” 

Another shrug, and Connor reached to pat Gavin’s hand. “It’s fine. How was your stakeout!?”

“Successful. Caught her, booked her, home by midnight. Oh, shit, speaking of—” 

He glanced down at his watch. 11:58, there was still time. Perfect. From his jacket pocket Gavin produced a green envelope, BABE written on the front in his scratchy handwriting. “Here.”

“Oh, thank you,” Connor said, smiling a little as he took the card. With one thumb he carefully opened the flap. Once upon a time Gavin would have found the way he did it without tearing the envelope deeply irritating, but now it was endearing. Connor did everything with care and precision, even open a dollar store birthday card.

The card itself bore an illustration of a woman holding two wine glasses. Above her head, in violet foil, it said “Lordy Lordy, Look Who’s 40,” but Gavin had crossed out the 0.

Lordy Lordy, Look Who’s 4.

Connor laughed, and smiled, one of those rare grins that was so wide it crinkled his eyes and dimpled his cheeks and made Gavin’s heart stutter in his chest. Dropping his hands into his lap, still chuckling, Connor looked up and said, “Clever. Thank you.”

Gavin leaned in and kissed Connor’s cheek. “And I made it home while it’s still your birthday!” 

“You know I’ll still be four tomorrow,” Connor said. Then corrected, “In thirty-seven seconds.”

“Not the point,” Gavin replied, shrugging. “You’re supposed to get the card on your birthday. Open it up, quick, while there’s still time.”

“Now who’s the pedant?” Connor asked, lifting the card again. Inside was a short poem about aging like a good Cabernet, beneath which Gavin had drawn a heart and signed his name. There was also a gift card to the garden center—“I don’t know shit about plants, but I’ll drive you there”—and two tickets to the aquarium, dated the following Monday. 

The Shedd Aquarium. 

“This is in Chicago,” Connor said. He looked up, puzzled.

“Nines told me you mentioned wanting to go,” Gavin said. “So I got tickets. Also to the field museum. And you can see the Bean!”

“In… Chicago . Six hours away.”

Gavin winked. “Yeah. We’re leaving in the morning, so you should get some sleep.” 

Connor whacked him on the arm with the card. “I was sleeping, you dick!” 

“Harsh,” Gavin laughed, dramatically rubbing his bicep. “You’ve been spending too much time with Tina.”

“And you,” Connor said, then yelped when Gavin surged forward, catching him around the waist and twisting to pin him to the mattress. 

“Oh yeah? Too much time with me, huh?” Gavin teased, peppering Connor’s face with unnecessarily noisy kisses. “So you don’t want to go on a super fucking fun road trip together?”

Connor managed a “stop!” between gasps of laughter, made a cursory attempt at stopping the onslaught of sloppy adoration. Finally he caught Gavin’s face in his hands and, with another of those wonderful grins, said, “Of course I do, but I work on Monday.”

“Nah, you don’t.” He shifted to prop his head on his fist, but made no effort to get up from atop Connor. “I talked to Fowler last week, and you’re off for the next ten days. You know how much fucking PTO you’ve got stacked up, you workaholic?”

Folding one arm behind his head, Connor asked, “More or less than you?”

Begrudgingly, Gavin admitted, “Less. But only because you keep giving yours to other people.”

“Yeah, but I know you gave Chris three days of your sick leave when his son had pinkeye,” Connor said. 

Sticking his jaw out, Gavin said, “And?”

“You’re a soft touch, Gavin Reed,” Connor murmured, reaching and stroking a thumb over his boyfriend’s cheek. 

Turning his face to Connor’s palm, Gavin muttered against his skin, “Don’t fuckin’ tell anyone. I’ve got a reputation to uphold, you know.”

“Of course you do, darling. No one knows you aren’t a grizzled hardass,” Connor said, bringing Gavin down for a lingering kiss. “Except me. And the cat.”

“I can accept that.”

“But you should go take a shower,” Connor said, wrinkling his nose. “You smell like the inside of a squad car.”

Gavin sat up, swung his legs off the bed, but paused to flex. “And victory .”

“Sure.” Pushing up onto his elbows, Connor used a foot to push Gavin further away. “If victory smells like fast food and cigarettes and gas station coffee.”

“You bet your perfect ass it does,” Gavin said. Shrugging out of his jacket, he tossed it over the back of a nearby overstuffed chair. He continued to disrobe as he made his way to the bathroom, aiming for but mostly missing the hamper in the far corner. “I’ll get those later.”

“Hey, Gav,” Connor called.

Halting in the doorway, Gavin turned to look over his shoulder. “Yeah, babe?”

“I love you.”

Hustling nakedly back to the bed, Gavin slid across the sheets to steal a final kiss. “Love you too. Happy birthday. Sorry I woke you up.”

“Eh,” Connor shrugged. “Worth it.”

Notes:

pure silliness i decided to write this very morning. happy birthday to everyone’s favorite sad robot!

as always thanks for any comments or kudos, and please follow me on tumblr for more ridiculousness

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