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(One morning, I woke up to find myself back in high school.)
“Toudou-sama, look over here!”
“Over here!”
“Toudou-sama, you can do it!”
“Hakone! Hakone!”
(It was just how I remembered it, beautiful forests and mountains and that blue school that honed me into who I am now.)
Bicycles raced along the national road as people cheered on, energy high at the start of a national race, excitement in the air as the parade run went through with the kings of the race at the front, the single-number jerseys bright blue and every ounce as regal as people called them were.
The reigning kings of the Inter-High—Hakone Gakuen, with an all-ace team, led the pack into the first leg of the race.
(The summer sun was hot, the day clear and perfect. It was everything I wished my last Inter-High would be.)
As the sprint stage came to a close, the mountains loomed in front of him, and with a grin, he headed onwards ahead of his team, excited to fight, excited to win as the King of the Mountain.
Blue and yellow were evenly matched, yellow triumphant in the sprinter stage but blue not about ready to let them win the mountain stage either.
(And another thing that made that Inter-High perfect for me:)
He cycled ahead of his team, cycling at the same pace as the yellows, where he could see the billowing and flowing and ebbing of beautiful green hair at the front, and it made his chest hurt and bubble with happiness.
“Maki-chan!” he called over his shoulder, all excited grins and eyes wide with glee. “Come on!”
(You were there too.)
But he received no reply, and when he looked over his shoulder, at where he knew yellow jerseys would be, there was only a downward slope into darkness and rain began to fall as images of his even younger self making a promise of another fight, another battle, another race, and that lopsided half-grin and those beauty marks and those sad, sad blue eyes—
(But you, for some reason, couldn’t make it.)
“I’m sorry.” he heard his voice whisper into his mind, and—
“Maki-chan!” Toudou gasped into the cold early morning air, and his eyes flew open to look up at the light on the ceiling, still unimposing on his view and hard to see in the dimness of his room. Groaning, he sat up and rubbed his temples. “… Another weird dream. Who the hell is this Maki-chan, even?” He murmured to himself, his sentence ending in a yawn as he looked at his bedside table—it was 4:11 in the morning. He sighed and curled up on his side as he stared out into the darkness of his room. He reached for his phone on the bedside table and took a look at his schedule again for that day.
Classes start at 7. Well, he was off to a good start, at least.
Sighing, he got out of bed and headed to the bathroom. Might as well get ready early so he wouldn’t rush through choosing what headband he would wear that day.
The second semester entrance ceremony was, as always, a droll, and he was glad to have it done with as he walked to his first class of the day—English. As he made his way to the lecture hall he heard hushed whispers from people he walked past as he neared the door.
“Hey, have you heard about this guy, Makishima Yuusuke?”
“No. Isn’t he that fashion student?”
“Yeah, him, right? Rumour has it, he’s had that kid since he was 18.”
“That cute little kid he brings along with him sometimes? I thought that was his little brother?”
“No, he’s totally his. Mariko told me he had a child with this cougar who hit him up.”
“That’s terrible!”
Toudou frowned at this a little, but pressed no further as he stepped inside his classroom—
Only to have a little boy crash into him as he entered. He jolted, surprised, as he froze in his place. The boy fell onto his behind and looked up at him with big, tear-filled eyes, looking nearly ready to cry.
“Oh, my God, uh,” Toudou began to say, as the child opened his mouth to cry, when someone ran up to them and picked him up with ease, hushing him into calmness, much to Toudou’s relief. He opened his mouth to thank the person, when he paused upon seeing green.
He blinked and took a good look at the person he stood in front of.
He was tall, and slim, with tired blue eyes that looked too painfully familiar to be real and—his hair. It was long, green and looked silky to the touch, and—wait. He’s seen this before.
In his dream. During the Inter-High.
“Um, sorry about Sakamichi, he’s a little excited since he’s staying the whole day with me today…” the young man was saying.
This was him. This was his Maki-chan.
“Um, hello?” the green-haired man waved a hand in his face. “I’m… going to go now.” He said, but Toudou, curse his mouth, spoke up as he grabbed the man’s free wrist.
“Are you a climber?” he blurted out, and the young man blinked at him for a long moment before he realised what he said and a flush crossed his face. “Ah, sorry, I, uh,”
The young man chuckled and shook his head. “Actually, yeah, I am. Although, that’s not usually the first thing people ask of me.” He said, shrugging, casting an indiscreet glance at the boy squirming in his arms before he turned his attention back to Toudou. “Usually people ask for names first.”
“Ah, right, Toudou Jinpachi.” Toudou replied, mentally kicking himself in the behind for stammering too much, and the green-haired man nodded at him courteously.
“Makishima Yuusuke.” He replied, before turning away. “I’m sitting at the back today, if you don’t mind.”
He walked away, and Toudou stood there for a long while, figuring out what Makishima told him, when he realised he was being invited to sit down with him. Nodding to no one, he hurried up the steps in the lecture hall to take a seat next to Makishima—rather, his child, who let Makishima seat him between him and this strange new stranger.
The boy was staring up at him with wide eyes as he waved awkwardly back.
“Hi, there…?” he ventured, and the boy nodded, turning back to his paper, crayon in hand, and for a moment Toudou was at a loss on what to do, when the boy handed him the paper.
“O…no da… Sakamichi?” he read the child’s scrawl and the boy nodded, before scooting closer to his guardian again. He smiled a little at that, and let the boy be.
( I trained so hard for that Inter-High, and I know you did too .)
“I’m sending you out to scout Souhoku out, Manami. They have a third-year who’s got an interesting climb.”
The blue-haired teen’s eyes lit up and a smile crossed his lips.
“A climber?”
(Of course, there were times where our team shenanigans brought a few rocks in the road for us.)
“I saw him, Toudou-san! He had a lovely smile and short hair, and his climbing is exceptional!”
Toudou’s eyes widened at Manami, as the boy smiled back at him.
The image of short green hair and an actual smile crossed his mind—dad Maki-chan changed his image to shock him or something?!
(But all was well and we—well, I called often.)
“Hello, Maki-chan? Wow, you don’t usually call me!”
“You’re the one who called me first.”
“How are you doing?” he asked, his usual smile crossing his face at the sound of his voice, flustered, as always.
A huff of a laugh. “All right, I guess.”
He blinked for a moment, and grinned. “You’re in a good mood. Did something happen?”
Makishima huffed again, and he could hear the rustle of hair. He must be playing with it again, so his smile widened. He knew the next thing he would say.
“It’s a secret.”
“That’s not fair!”
(But we both know each other’s secrets anyway.)
“By the way, we’ve got a first-year regular, too. He’s a climber like me, and his style’s even the same. His name is Mana… whoops! I can’t tell you anymore! It’s a secret.”
He could nearly giggle at how silly it was but he knew Makishima wouldn’t judge him for it.
“You’ve already told me almost everything.” Makishima’s deadpan reply was something he could really laugh at, but he could hear the fondness in Makishima’s voice. “Hey, Jinpachi.”
“Yeah?” he asked, twirling a lock of his hair in his fingers.
“You will be at the Inter-High, right?”
He grinned, and did a thumbs-up, despite knowing Makishima couldn’t see him. “I will. I promised.”
He could nearly hear the smile on Makishima’s face as he huffed.
“Good.”
(And knowing I was one of the few you trusted made me so, so happy.)
There he was again, on that mountain road, at the front of the whole race, looking over his shoulder, waiting for someone—just that one person, please, God—as above his head the summer sky gave way to rumbling, dark clouds as the sound of rain grew louder and louder in his ears.
(But then you couldn’t make it. It destroyed me.)
A single tear rolled down his cheek as he whispered, “You promised…”
“Toudou?” Makishima’s voice woke him from his sleep and he blinked, jolting upright into full consciousness to find that no, he wasn’t stuck on that eternal climb the was breaking his heart and mind, he had fallen asleep next to Makishima as they studied together inside the campus library. A glance at the watch near the exit double-doors told him that it was nearing 4:30 and this was the usual time Makishima left to pick up his son at that day care on top of a hill.
“Ah, sorry,” Toudou began to say, his words dissolving into a yawn as he stretched, before settling down to look apologetically at Makishima. “Didn’t realise I fell asleep.”
“No harm done. Have you been getting enough sleep?” Makishima asked noncommittally, packing up his sketchbooks and pencils along with a few photocopies of textbooks into his bag. Toudou chuckled, and shrugged.
“I’ve been getting weird dreams lately. I’ve lost a bit of sleep over some, but it’s no big deal.”
“A glass of warm milk and a hot bath before bed.” Makishima replied almost automatically and for a moment Toudou stared at him while the green-haired man looked back at him. “What?” he bit back defensively, and he snickered.
“Yes, mom.” He drawled, and at that Makishima rolled his eyes and lightly smacked Toudou’s arm.
“Come on. Up. Sakamichi said he wanted to see you today.” He said, getting up from his seat and slinging his bag over his shoulder.
“Alright, alright.” Toudou laughed. “Did you bring your road racer today?” he asked, also getting up as he patted the helmet held up at the front of his bag. “Please tell me you did.”
Makishima gave him one of his strange lopsided not-quite grins and gave him a thumbs-up. “I’ll race you.”
“Deal.”
He was both proud and ashamed of admitting that Makishima was the first person to truly soundly beat him in climbing. He had first tasted defeat in the same road to Onoda’s day care, where Makishima’s alluring climbing left him eating dust and dreaming of flowing green hair and sunshine yellow jerseys for more days on end than ever.
He didn’t know if he was grateful for that or not, but he was grateful he finally had good competition in college.
“Maki-chan!” he burst out in the middle of the climb, laughing brightly as he watched Makishima’s—beautiful, beautiful—Spider Climb, from behind, watching the sunset catch in the green of his hair, and, shit—
He could really win if he tried. But he doesn’t want to. He wants to stay right here, where he can see Makishima’s blue eyes glow in the dim light of the evening and the gold reflect in meticulously-cared green-coloured hair that danced in the wind without ever tangling, and see the sweat sparkling off his pale skin over each smooth inch and those beauty marks.
Makishima was beautiful.
And, shit, Toudou Jinpachi finally realised he was in love with him.
( One morning, I woke up to find myself in high school. )
It was some tournament he could vaguely remember a few years ago, but here it was different yet still so much the same.
He was still the crowd favourite, standing proud and tall on the stage above the crowd with girls screaming his name and his grin wide and proud and—dare he say it—beautiful.
As usual, he’d win this race and bring home a trophy, like one of the many ones he has at home, and his mother would once again say something like, “Jinpachi, you’re amazing, you should go pro!” or something like that, and he’d laugh, flip his hair and flaunt the trophy, before wholeheartedly agreeing.
(Except I didn’t win this tournament.)
All he could see was green and wild side-to-side dancing and the wind moving past him like it didn’t before when he was at front.
His eyes were wide as he saw a green-haired teen climb past him with frightening speed and ease and crossed first.
(You did.)
He was mad, so very mad—but then after several races, he didn’t think it was so bad, having a rival. It was like having an eccentric friendship… with someone as eccentric as he was.
(You taught me loss. You taught me friendship.)
Hundreds of calls and thousands of texts later and it all boiled down to that one race that hot summer’s day, where blue and yellow battled against each other like promises fulfilled in prophecies of old.
It was promised to be the time of their lives.
(You taught me love.)
“So why didn’t you follow me, Maki-chan?”
Toudou’s eyes flew open in the darkness of his room, and he groaned, digging the heels of his hands against his forehead as his cheeks heated up.
He was in love with Makishima Yuusuke, and, okay, shit, he had been dreaming about him since forever in some other life when they were all he wished they would and could be.
Toudou sat up in his bed, huffing angrily, to find that the time was 3:08 in the morning. He sighed, and got out of bed to dig out an old notebook from his drawers on his desk. Setting it down on the desk and turning the lamp on, he flicked it open to the first page where he had written about the first dream he had of that strange but beautiful green-haired teen, before grabbing a pen, flicking to the first available blank page and began to write.
Dear Maki-chan,
I don’t know what the bigger irony is—that it took me, of all people, a year to realise I was in love with someone as beautiful as you, or that I knew you, I climbed with you once upon a dream…
“Maki-chan, are you sewing?” he asked, blinking at the sparkling pink sequin cloth in Makishima’s hands as he watched slim fingers nimbly pass a needle and thread through the cloth.
“Ah, yeah.” The man nodded, using his teeth to cut the thread before holding out the stitch in front of him, frowning at it thoughtfully before nodding. “Sakamichi has a stage performance this Friday at the Kanzaki Day Care. I’m making his costume.”
“Oh, what’s it about?” Toudou leaned in near to Makishima to watch him pull out the sketch of the boy’s costume from his sketchbook. He looked down to see a pink-purple princely outfit with a matching white cape and jewel-pin ribbon… was this a sailor prince costume?
“It’s a speech about someone they care about most. Kanzaki told me Sakamichi should be in costume, and he insisted he wanted to look like that girl from his favourite anime, so I had to improvise.” He held up the pink sequin cloth and looked at it thoughtfully. “… Not enough sequins.”
Toudou’s grin twitched a little, and pressed his hand down on top of Makishima’s to lower the pink sparkly cloth. “I think that’s more than enough sequins, actually.” He sighed, as beside him Makishima snorted and mumbled something like ‘never too much sequins’, and Toudou barked out a laugh. “Maki-chan, the cloth’s a little rough, though. Won’t Onoda-kun itch?”
Makishima blinked at him, and his mouth hung open. “You’re right.” He nodded, before pulling his hand away to set the sequin cloth aside to mess around with more materials in his bag. Toudou, meanwhile, sat there, stock still for a moment to realise his hand was on Makishima’s.
He was also secretly glad the other man didn’t say anything about it.
( If I was the so-called Sleeping Beauty, then you would be the dream I sleep for. )
“I’m Hakogaku’s Mountain God, the Sleeping Beauty!”
“I told you, Toudou, they call you the Forest Ninja behind your back!”
The sound of bright laughter—a yellow first year and a blue first year—rang in the air as Toudou spluttered and whacked green hair with the bouquet he got that afternoon, splashing petals on his hair that clung on messy curls and tangles like fairies hugging vines.
They reminded him of sakura on the surface of water.
“Toudou, Manami! Get over here, damn it!”
(When I dream of you, I’d never call it a nightmare, no matter what happens.)
Toudou turned to his side to say goodbye to green in yellow, to find it far, far away from him, as storm clouds began gathering overhead and he could very nearly cry, looking up with the storm in his eyes as he screamed over the thunder to bring him back, bring back his lovely to him, oh, God, please—
But he grew farther and farther away and his voice turned hoarse over the rain.
“You promised…”
(The storm clouds that passed weren’t the only things I knew were there.)
He looked onwards, past the thunder and the rain and the lightning and he could see the sun beyond the clouds and he wiped away his tears of mountain leaf dewdrops and tiny white flowers budding and bursting.
He fell back, leaning into cool earth wafting petrichor, grass soft against his skin as his hair billowed out from either side of his head, flowers blooming around him like living death, as a smile slowly spread across his face, his hands shifting from growing roots over his chest as he settled down into the earth, steadily slipping into bright darkness of sleep.
(The sun, I know, will shine on the Mountain God once more, someday.)
Petals fell from his eyes and vines burst from his lips as the wind blew around him, as he watched the storm pass, the rain softening to smooth caresses of butterfly kisses as the sky turned clear and blue and sunny again.
He could see sunflowers begin to grow behind his eyelids as they slid closed.
(The rainbow reflected in my tears like light passing through glass. I had never felt more thankful.)
Toudou sat up, in tears, but he was smiling as he clambered out of bed, hurriedly and dazedly pulling out his dream journal as he reached for the nearest writing instrument he could get his hand on. He felt his calligraphy brush press against his palm and he deemed it enough, as he quickly uncapped the ink bottle, dipping the brush in it before writing across two pages,
THANK YOU
Later his mother caught sight of his dream journal’s calligraphy and congratulated him on writing so beautifully.
Looking at the two pages that evening before he went to sleep, he couldn’t help but wholly agree.
Toudou heard whispers again when he was on his way to meet Makishima in the university cafeteria.
“Do you think that Makishima guy is receiving compensation from that jaguar?”
“Probably not! He got her pregnant with a kid she didn’t even want!”
“God, that’s terrible.”
Toudou grit his teeth and kept walking.
The proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back was when he saw the other parents’ expressions when he went with Makishima to pick Onoda up at the Kanzaki Day Care. The dirty looks they were giving Makishima as he kissed Onoda’s forehead and lifted him into a hug felt like stones being thrown at him and for a moment Toudou could hear thunder rumbling in his mind.
He didn’t say a word as he watched Makishima get Onoda ready to head home, helping him get on the mommy bike behind him, before getting on himself. He knew Makishima noticed how silent he was, but didn’t say anything about it, letting him tag along on his road racer until their apartment, Onoda’s excited recount of the day punctuating their journey until they got home, the boy rushing to the TV to watch his anime while he and Makishima headed into the kitchen to prepare dinner, and, more importantly, to talk.
“What’s the matter?” Makishima asked quietly as he chopped vegetables, Toudou filling up the pitcher with water for the rice. “You’ve been quiet.”
“Why don’t you tell everyone the truth?” he asked, and Makishima paused, his hair falling over his eyes for a moment, before he turned around to grin at Toudou, but with little success.
“What?”
“Tell everyone the truth about Onoda-kun.”
Makishima’s hand fell, and he could see it trembling slightly. He didn’t want this conversation, but he also wanted it to happen. Toudou hated seeing Makishima like this, upset too visibly to be comfortable, but he steeled himself and kept talking.
“Don’t you know what they’re saying behind your back?” He quietly sighed, voice hardly a murmur but it sounded way too loud in his ears. In front of him Makishima visibly deflated, and he sighed, gripping his arm and squeezing. Toudou took a step forward, but Makishima looked at him with such a pained expression Toudou could feel it stab his chest.
“I’d rather let them talk about me than Sakamichi.” Makishima replied quietly.
“Maki-chan,” Toudou paused, swallowed, and continued, “You can’t let people keep talking about you like that.”
He looked back at Toudou with a broken smile and teary eyes. “It doesn’t matter.” He shrugged, turning his attention back to the vegetable he was cutting. “I have Sakamichi, and he has me. That’s all that matters.”
His shoulders were shaking and Toudou sighed, closed his eyes and took a step forward to wrap his arms around Makishima’s shoulders.
“I want you to know you have me, too.”
Makishima didn’t say anything, but his hand squeezed his wrist, and it was enough.
"Maki.” The boy whispered to himself, unseen. “Don’t give up, Maki.”
“Sakamichi, it’s okay,” Makishima was saying softly to the whimpering boy in his arms, “You know, you don’t have to do this. It won’t be the same if you’re not having fun.”
“But I wanna do it! For Maki!” Onoda insisted, whimpering loudly when the gym’s door loudly opened to reveal someone standing at the door. The boy whined and clung to his guardian, who sighed exasperatedly, before looking over his shoulder to realise it was Toudou who had stepped in, with two coffees and a hot chocolate, smiling at them both as he held them up as a peace offering.
Makishima sighed, and thanked him for his trouble, as the two of them pulled up four plastic chairs—three for them to sit on and the fourth for all their things to sit on.
“So, Onoda-kun, you’re having problems?” Toudou asked as Makishima helped Onoda cool his chocolate first before letting him take a sip.
“A-ah, yeah.” Onoda nodded meekly. “I wanna perform but there will be lots of people and ‘m scared…”
Makishima sighed fondly and stroked Onoda’s hair, before looking apologetically at Toudou.
“Well, I’ve always been pretty good at talking on stage.” Toudou tapped his chin. “Want me to teach you?”
Onoda’s eyes lit up and he bolted upright. “Really, Toudou-san?”
“Sure.” He smiled, shrugging. “You look like you need my excellent skills.” He huffed, flipping his hair, and Onoda cheered in delight and clapped his hands, while Makishima shook his head and laughed fondly.
Toudou felt his chest tighten up again.
This could work, he thought to himself.
He took a long look at Makishima’s true smile as he patted Onoda’s hair and talked to him about practice with Toudou, and his own wouldn’t go away.
Yeah, this could really work.
( One morning, I woke up to find myself back in high school .)
“Toudou-sama, look over here!”
“Over here!”
“Toudou-sama, you can do it!”
“Hakone! Hakone!”
(It was just how I remembered it, beautiful forests and mountains and that blue school that honed me into who I am now.)
He was at the very front of the race, the wind flowing freely, cooling his sweat, his overheated body. The cheers of the crowd was at his back and the weather couldn’t be better than what he had now.
It was the best moment ever—
Well, it should be, but it was also raining.
There were gathering storm clouds in the Mountain God’s mind, rain pouring from his eyes, lightning brewing in his chest.
(I wanted this race to end as soon as possible.)
He had abandoned everything to get here, everything he loved, and compressed into the body of the one he loved, into lithe, long limbs and pale skin and two beauty marks and haunting blue eyes.
(The itsy-bitsy spider went up the mountain track.)
The storm was growing stronger in his mind and visibility became something he didn’t have as the rain blurred his vision, hexagons of muted rainbows reflected in his vision like light off broken glass—
(Down came the rain and pushed the spider back.)
A false sliver of hope—lighting flashed in Toudou’s eyes—and he looked back to see someone else following after him.
It wasn’t green in yellow.
What was the point?
(Out came the sun and dried up the Mountain God’s rain.)
But then he could hear the sound of another approaching bike. He slowed down, shock taking over his body as he let the other racer pass him, uncaring, too shell-shocked at what he was hearing as he looked over his shoulder to see yellow sunflowers blooming behind his eyelids in a sea of green.
The Mountain God’s eyes spilled morning dew as a smile crossed his face.
And the itsy-bitsy spider climbed up to him again.
“Jinpachi!” Makishima’s voice echoed in his head, and he reached out behind him at where he could hear the voice coming from—
Only his eyes opened and he was in his bedroom, reaching out to the ceiling and his pillow wet with fresh tears. A wobbly smile crossed his face and he pressed his palms against his wet eyes.
“Maki-chan, you came.” He whispered to himself. “You really came…”
“Toudou-san, your eyes are all red!” Onoda gasped, sparkling pink, purple and yellow in his completed costume, all made by Makishima by hand. The little boy, his gloved hand in Makishima’s, reached his other hand to Toudou’s, and squeezed one of his fingers comfortingly. “Are you okay?”
Toudou looked to Makishima, who was also looking at him worriedly, and he laughed, shaking his head, patting Onoda’s hair. “I’m fine.” He assured the boy, before grinning at Makishima. “I’m… really, really fine.” He sighed, and at this Makishima raised an eyebrow, but he nodded and let it slide, pulling out two red tickets from his bag.
“One for you and one for me.” He said, handing one to Toudou, who took it with a small ‘thank you’. “I’ll just take Sakamichi to the backstage, and I’ll meet up with you at our seats.”
“Sure.” Toudou nodded, and headed off inside the auditorium, as Makishima took Onoda’s hand and led him to the backstage entrance.
It didn’t take long for Makishima to take a seat next to Toudou, apologising quietly and pointedly ignoring the looks the parents were giving him as he settled down. “Sakamichi appreciates you coming.” He murmured to Toudou. “You helped him get confident enough to talk on stage.” he smiled a little at that, “And went through so much trouble to keep his speech a secret from me.”
“It’s for you, Maki-chan.” He grinned, winking. “You need to hear it for the first time here so you’ll really feel it.” He looked down at the ticket, and laughed. “Daddy?” he read, “Don’t tell me you took the Mommy ticket on purpose.”
“Idiot, you took that ticket before I noticed they were assigned to each parent.” Makishima huffed, but he was laughing. “But if I had my say, you’re getting this mom ticket.”
Toudou laughed at that, and flipped his hair, “I could be beautiful enough for that,” at this Makishima rolled his eyes, “But I think it suits you better.”
Makishima looked ready to retort with a wise-ass reply, when Toudou spoke up again.
“Rather, I think you deserve both. For being both for Onoda-kun.”
The green-haired man blinked at him, before smiling one of his true smiles, and Toudou mirrored it with his own smile.
“Thank you.” Makishima quietly replied, and before Toudou could reply, the bell sounded, signalling the start of the program. The audience fell to silence, and one by one, the children performed, until it was Onoda’s turn to stand in the front and talk.
He stood in front of a mic stand that was taller than he was—Kanzaki rushed to the stage to adjust it to Onoda’s height, and good-natured chuckles filled the auditorium before he rushed off. He looked around a little nervously, and Makishima raised his hand to wave at him to show him he was there for him. Toudou waved his hand too, and Onoda’s face broke into a wide smile before he took a deep breath and began to speak.
“Hello. My name is Onoda Sakamichi, and I wanna talk to everyone about my most wonderful Maki.” He said slowly, and clearly, as Toudou had told him—don’t rush, he told himself as he took another breath as the audience clapped. “Maki is very important to me because he is my Maki and I’d rather have no one else.”
Toudou saw Makishima smile warmly and press his hands against his chest, and he felt his own tighten a little at the sight.
“I don’t have a mother, or a father,” Onoda continued, and the crowd began to murmur as Makishima’s eyes widened. “I don’t know who they are and I don’t know why they’re gone, but that doesn’t matter because I have Maki.”
“… Sakamichi.” Makishima breathed to himself, as Toudou rubbed his hand on Makishima’s back.
“Maki does everything my playmates’ mothers and fathers do. He makes dinner and cleans the house and kills the cockroaches and fixes the light bulb, and he also tucks me in at night and stays with me when the sky is loud and it’s raining hard.” Onoda swallowed hard. “I don’t need a mommy and a daddy if I have Maki.”
Makishima looked near tears and Toudou pressed his handkerchief into his quivering hand.
“Toudou-san told me that Maki found me. I want to think Maki chose me.” He smiled, pressing his hands on his chest like Makishima was, sans the death grip on his shirt and Toudou’s wrist. “Maki loves me very much. He makes my sad go away and kisses me when he’s happy, or sad, or when ‘m happy or sad and I think that makes him the best mommy and daddy in the world and that he should always be happy.”
Makishima stole a glance at Toudou as around them the parents looked at Makishima. Toudou flushed and refused to meet his gaze, instead focusing on how the look of distrust and suspicion melted into sympathy and apology.
“But lately Maki has been sad because bad things have been happening, so I want to tell him now that things will be okay, and that he shouldn’t give up.” He smiled at Makishima, who was smiling back at him as best as he could past his tears. “I love you, Maki. Thank you for everything.”
Onoda bowed, and the whole auditorium burst into applause as Makishima laughed helplessly, cheeks tear-streaked and his hands weakly clapping and laughing as the applause died down and the next child performed.
Makishima carried the sleeping Onoda in his arms, kissing his forehead softly and chuckling as he felt Onoda’s hand fist in his hair gently. Beside him at a distance, Toudou stood, smiling at the sight as he stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets. Makishima peered at him from over his shoulder and Toudou’s chest stung again at the sight of his eyes—red and puffy as his was from this morning.
He opened his car door to let Makishima slip Onoda inside at the back seat, buckling him in to keep him from rolling around, before closing the door again, leaving the two of them alone outside.
“Maki-chan.” Toudou sighed to break the silence, and Makishima shook his head, smiling.
“Toudou.” He replied, before looking right at him. “Can I call you Jinpachi?”
“Jinpachi!” Makishima’s voice echoed in his dream, and he smiled widely.
“It would be my pleasure if you did.” He replied instead, and Makishima nodded.
“Jinpachi, thank you. Truly.” The green-haired man softly told him. “For all this.”
“I’m thankful to you too, Maki-chan.” Toudou replied, just as softly, and stepped forward as Makishima snorted inelegantly.
“What did I do for you?” he asked, turning aside, fiddling with his hair a little, tucking the other side behind his ear, and Toudou’s smile grew affectionate as he watched orange sunlight catch in the green of his hair, in his lashes, reflecting off his eyes, casting them with a glow that matched the way the light made his skin glow.
Makishima Yuusuke was truly a gift to the eyes.
“More than you know.” Toudou replied simply, before turning to get in the car. “Come on, let’s go home?”
Makishima shook his head, his hair a cascade of green-red-orange over his shoulder, as he chuckled and pulled his bangs back. “Let’s have dinner first.”
Toudou chuckled. “Anything you like, Maki-chan.”
One morning, I woke up to find myself back in high school.
Your team won the Inter-High.
My team lost, but I didn’t mind. Not when I spent it with you the way I wanted to.
The particular day I woke up to was the day you told me you were leaving.
I woke up again to say goodbye.
And I woke up again to say hello again, to hold you in my arms after too long.
I wonder what you look like years from now. Are you still this wholesome as I remember you? Are you still this awkward? Are you still climbing?
Are you still as beautiful as the day I said goodbye to you?
Toudou opened his eyes slowly to peer up at the ceiling of his bedroom, a smile crossing his face.
“It’s been ages since I dreamt of something like that again.” He murmured to himself, getting out of bed as he glanced at his bedside table clock—11:59. “That’s new.” He chuckled, heading to his desk to write in his dream journal, when his phone rang. He blinked at it, but he picked up.
“Toudou.” Makishima’s voice spoke up from the other side, and a grin spread across his face as he sat down, flicking his dream journal open.
“Maki-chan! It’s rare for you to call first. And at this hour.” He chuckled, and at the other side, Makishima scoffed.
“You like it anyway.”
“You know me so well.” He chuckled.
“Whatever. Anyway, it’s 12 right?”
Toudou looked at his watch, and hummed his response.
“Happy birthday, Jinpachi.”
Toudou’s eyes widened. “… Maki-chan.”
“From me and Sakamichi.” A pause for a moment, before Makishima spoke up again. “I don’t have classes starting 11. Want to hang out today? Just the two of us. Remember what I said in the reserve? I’ll make it up to you.”
Toudou’s smile was wide. “I’ll see you at 11, then.” He replied, and he heard Makishima huff in approval.
“Don’t be late.”
“I won’t.”
“Good. Bye, Jinpachi. See you later.”
“See you later.” Toudou laughed at the sound of a click and the dial tone, before he leant back in his seat and looked down at his dream journal, reaching for a pen on his desk.
It’s a date, Yuusuke.