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Tanjirou almost eerily expects the way Zenitsu burst into his office, crying and wailing to be comforted. Nezuko, who was just about finished relaying her report, stops and makes way for their crybaby client.
“Tanjirou!!” The blonde wails, stumbling inside with hurried steps. Tanjirou nonchalantly prepares his kerchief, reminding himself that he should probably go buy a pair solely for Zenitsu's use.
When the blonde catches sight of Nezuko, his demeanor changes to his usual love-struck mode. “Nezuko-chan!! Comfort me!!” He makes grabby hands at her from where he’s collapsed himself on the sofa.
Nezuko, like the kind lady she is, only smiles at him and waves.
Tanjirou sighs and just gestures for her to leave this to him, reluctantly. “I’ll be doing the comforting, Zenitsu.” He mutters as he distracts the blonde from his dear little sister. Tanjirou doesn't want to deal with him trying to propose to her again.
Zenitsu clearly wants to protest, but doesn’t hesitate when Tanjirou offers his shoulder, only waving pitifully at the outgoing Nezuko.
“So why did she reject you this time?” Tanjirou starts. There's only ever two reasons to Zenitsu's rejections, the two being either his personality or his speech.
As if a switch has been flipped, Zenitsu goes right back into wailing. “She said she didn’t like the way I talked!!” The blonde clings to his arm, squirming around violently. “What’s wrong with the way I talk, Tanjirou?!”
Ah, so it's speech, Tanjirou notes. “Maybe if you didn’t come on too strong--”
“I didn’t!! I didn't even do any pick-up lines but she called me boring!!” Actual tears start to flow and Tanjirou has to hurry and wipe them off, or they're going straight to his suit. “What should I do?!”
The redhead doesn't reply, focusing on keeping Zenitsu's face dry and clean.
Please find my grandson a wife, were the words esteemed millionaire Kuwajima had told him when he first dumped Zenitsu on his doorstep.
Tanjirou didn't really think they'd have such a high profile client so soon after business had opened, but here Kuwajima was, offering a large sum just to get his successor a partner.
The old man had shared his worries for the blonde. How Zenitsu was an orphan, and wasn't treated the best while he stayed at the orphanage. So he's tried to shower him in as much love as he can, but knew that familial love wasn't going to cut it, and he decided to have him look for a partner.
Someone stable and responsible, just tolerant enough to entertain his clingy-ness, he had said.
“Can you promise me this, young man?”
And Tanjirou, unable to back down from a challenge, nodded right away.
“Of course!”
But he didn’t expect to handle someone so--un-matchable.
Not that Zenitsu wasn’t a good person, it was just his communication and social skills that stood in the way of anyone too impatient to actually look over his qualities on the first date. They always saw the blonde’s noisy, delicate and anxious side, not his generosity or his empathy.
Tanjirou can’t blame them, though. The blonde was incredibly loud and open with his emotions, too loud and open probably.
But seeing Zenitsu, who has grown to be one of his closest friends, cry to him about never finding love always reminded him that he was just a scared boy. Just a guy that got forced into a really sophisticated lifestyle. All these rich ladies didn't actually care for him, they cared about his money. And unfortunately for them, Zenitsu didn't know how to flaunt his wealth.
“We’ll find another girl for you, okay?” He soothes once Zenitsu had calmed down from his usual tantrums. Tanjirou's hands run through the blonde's locks. “In the meantime, just relax okay?”
When Zenitsu doesn't reply, he continues on. “Girls don’t like it when you’re not yourself.”
“But I’ve tried being myself. And I’ve tried being other people too!!” That's a dangerous thought, Tanjirou thinks as he continues to listen. “I’ve even tried to be you!!”
Tanjirou pauses. “That’s--” disturbing.
Zenitsu doesn't bother for his reaction, only continuing to go down his rant. “What do girls even want?! All they keep saying is that I talk too much or I'm boring and--!!” The blonde inhales sharply. “The only girl I’ve ever had my heart beat for so far is Nezu--”
Alright, enough. Tanjirou stands from his seat beside Zenitsu, ignoring his protests.
“After I’m finished with my shift, we’ll go out for dinner okay? Just wait here.” He instructs, going to his desk to finish any paperwork he had due so he can comfort the blonde with food soon.
Zenitsu obediently stays, continuing to mope on the sofa.
The events went on and on by repeat; find Zenitsu a girl, let them go on a blind date, girl rejects Zenitsu, and cue Tanjirou comforting him for a few weeks before he's ready to try again.
After months and months of digging for suitable women for his friend, Tanjirou was starting to lose hope.
Until Kanao happened.
It started off as it usually did, with Tanjirou having to forcibly push Zenitsu into the date, but what happens after is what jars him.
Zenitsu enters his office like a normal person. He doesn't cry or wail, he just enters like any other, but he's clearly twitchy and fidgety.
Tanjirou, worried that something may have gone wrong, asks to get answers. “Zenitsu?”
“I got rejected.” The blonde replies curtly, looking like he wasn't rejected at all. He even looks excited.
Tanjirou stares at the way Zenitsu plays with his fingers. “It’s back to the drawing board, huh?” He says, still suspicious, but he tries to keep things normal. “Well, give me--”
“Um, Tanjirou?” Zenitsu meekly speaks up, “Can I stop the blind dates for a while?”
That's odd, Tanjirou thinks, narrowing his eyes at the blonde. Was he getting sick of all the dates or has he found someone he wanted to actually pursue?
“Why?” He can't help the disbelief in his tone.
“Ah.” A blush grows on Zenitsu's cheeks, Tanjirou blinks in mild surprise. “I just want to have a break, you know. Kanao told me it would help.”
So it was her advice, Tanjirou hums, tapping his desk in thought. Zenitsu's never talked about his dates before, and he's never heard him bring up a single name from them. What happened with this Kanao person?
“I thought she rejected you?”
“Yeah but she said we’re friends so--!!” Zenitsu is quick to deny any romantic feelings, that's even more new development than Tanjirou's ever seen in him in months. “At least I got a friend out of it!”
Willingly considering the opposite sex as friendship material? For some reason, that bothers Tanjirou more than the prospect of Zenitsu actually falling for her.
He can only nod mutely to his friend's enthusiasm. He can't dampen Zenitsu's spirit now, that would ruin his experience. Instead he gives the blonde a warm smile despite the storm brewing in his head.
Did Tanjirou feel threatened? Because he wasn't the only one to be called Zenitsu's friend now?
He frowns.
Maybe he has a complex.
Tanjirou entertains Zenitsu's request, putting a hold on the dates he'd set up.
He'd half expected to never see the blonde again in his office after the cancellations, but he finds Zenitsu stopping by more and more. The blonde would visit him on his break, either just to catch up or gush over Nezuko.
Tanjirou can tell that Kanao's a good influence, from the way the blonde had started to talk more calmly or fix his attitude around in public. From Zenitsu's stories about her, it seems that she's avidly helping Zenitsu be a proper adult.
It doesn't sit well with Tanjirou.
He's been with Zenitsu for longer, tried to get him in shape for longer, and he'd never seen the blonde improve so fast. Even the amount of people wanting to date the blonde for a change had been surging up, due to his improving public image. All because of Kanao.
Zenitsu clearly has a catch right here. Even though he just says it's friendship.
“I don’t get why you’re not trying to make a move on her.” Tanjirou says one day as Zenitsu's lying on his sofa, scrolling through his social media. He tries not to let the bitterness show in his tone. “You’re obviously getting along.”
The blonde peers up at him, “Yeah, but.” He mumbles, hiding behind his phone shyly. “She’s just a friend.”
Tanjirou gives him a look.
“It’s not an unrequited love or anything!!” Zenitsu protests, jumping up from the seat to flail his arms around. “She’s just genuinely--you know!!”
Tanjirou does know, but it doesn’t quell the feeling in his gut.
Just a friend. Just a friend.
Tanjirou frowns.
He doesn't know why he's so jealous. Zenitsu's finally got someone else to hang out with him, and that lets him have more time in his hands to manage his own life.
Tanjirou doesn't deserve to be irritated when the blonde doesn't reply to his messages enthusiastically any more, or when he doesn't pick up at the second ring of a call.
Maybe because not a single one of his dates has ever cared before, and his brain is just trying to cope with the loss of the teary-eyed blonde he's come to love be fond of.
Maybe, Tanjirou agrees with his thoughts.
Or maybe he just doesn't like the idea of sharing the blonde's attention.
When Tanjirou finally meets Kanao, it's in his office for an interview.
Just background checking. This is the first time Zenitsu had gotten along with someone, so he has to make sure there's no ulterior motives.
She's petite and has a serene smile. She doesn't talk much but acts gracefully, much like someone who's been trained to be for years. From what he knows, her family has been finding her a good husband for a while now, but she's been rejecting any possible suitors so far.
When she's seated on the sofa right across from Tanjirou, he feels like he's being examined from the way she stares on. He clears his throat and stands up, to make them some tea while they talk.
“You’re suspicious of me, aren’t you?” Her voice suddenly rings in the room, curious.
Tanjirou stops in his tracks. Something in her voice tells him she's implying a different kind of suspicion than normal.
She's not wrong. Tanjirou's suspicious of her, but not about any financial or material aspects. He just wants to know how far her affections go with Zenitsu in mind.
“Was I the first girl Zenitsu’s ever gotten along with?” Kanao asks casually. Her words are calm, no teasing or amusement to be heard.
Tanjirou gives her a reply in the same tone. “Yes.”
She hums. “I gave my file to your sister earlier.” She points out helpfully. “You should look through it with her.”
Throughout their conversation, for some reason, Tanjirou feels like he has to redact information about his relationship with Zenitsu. Although it was just really useless to do so, since Kanao had a keen eye for things and she could see right through him
It didn't help that Zenitsu decided to call him in the middle of their interview, whining about being stuck in a meeting.
“You obviously care a lot about him.” Kanao comments when the call finally ends. “Why don’t you try dating him?”
That's a funny thought that Tanjirou has entertained many times.
Tanjirou shakes his head. “He’s not interested in men.”
Kanao hums knowingly, “Not interested?” She says as if it's old news to her. Zenitsu has probably whined about it at one point in their talks. “Has he tried it yet?”
“No.” Zenitsu never really did give him a chance to.
“Suggest it.” She tells him, as if it’s the easiest thing for him to do.“There won't be any harm, would there?”
After she leaves, Tanjirou considers her words. Zenitsu doesn't do well with suggestions. Half of the time he ends up not doing them because he hesitates too much.
He'd better be aggressive about his approach.
“B-Boys?!” As predicted, Zenitsu is baffled at his offer. Which is why Tanjirou specifically chose to pop the question in public while they’re having dinner, so he doesn’t run away. “Tanjirou, I don’t--”
“You don’t like men?” Tanjirou is quick to follow-up, not letting the blonde cut a word in-between his. This might be his only chance to give the blonde a proper partner. “Or do you think you wouldn’t?”
Zenitsu wavers, looks like he hasn’t put much energy into the thought that he might need to experiment with his options. "I," He stutters, looking down at his plate. "I don't know."
It wasn’t a no, Tanjirou breathes a little easily and leans back on his chair. He can work on that.
"Then let's start easy." Tanjirou says simply, hands on his lap as he meets Zenitsu’s gaze head on. "Date me."
The blonde sputters, knocking his knees painfully on the table as he jolts. Tanjirou calmly arranges their dinnerware. "Wha--?!"
"I'm a boy, and we already get along." Tanjirou reasons, trying not to show his own nervousness at the plan he’s proposing. It’s stupid but if it got Zenitsu to agree, he’ll take it. "Just a little test run before I hand you off to somebody else." not.
Zenitsu stares at him, trying to see if it was some weird april fools joke. Unfortunately for him, it was already December and Tanjirou is quite serious with his proposition. When the redhead doesn’t budge after a few more seconds of staring, he gives up.
At Zenitsu's shy nod, Tanjirou stops holding his breath. "Okay." He feels as if a weight has been lifted off his chest. "I’m escorting you home." He says as he stands up from his seat.
Zenitsu, alarmed at the sudden decision, is frozen on his seat. “Tanjirou!!”
The man in question doesn't waste any time and hauls the blonde up from his seat.
“It's what boyfriends do.” Tanjirou instructs. He pats the blonde's hands curled on his arm. “Pay attention.”
He mentally apologizes to Kuwajima. It seems that Zenitsu won’t be getting a wife after all. At least not on his watch.
Tanjirou doesn't expect the appearance of a very frustrated Kaigaku, followed by a whimpering Zenitsu behind him.
“Who’s the ass who wants to take my shitty brother’s virginity?!” He screams as he slams the door to Tanjirou's office.
Tanjirou, who didn't get any sleep last night and had to chug two cups of coffee into his mouth to stay awake, smiles at him kindly. “I already have sir.”
When Tanjirou relays all of the events that have gone down to Kuwajima, he’s surprisingly benevolent about it. He's told that what really mattered was the blonde’s happiness, and all he asks of Tanjirou was to keep Zenitsu happy.
Tanjirou made sure to keep that promise, this time.