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Carlos had never been to a carnival before. Not a real one with all the different rides and stalls and people yelling. He hadn’t really ever felt the urge to go to one before to be honest and there seemed to be just as much noise as he suspected there would be. Nilanjana had seemed so keen to go and he knew that it was hard for her to go places by herself since she was also new to Night Vale. Carlos hadn’t realised that Nilanjana had also invited Darryl though and now he was feeling like quite the third wheel.
“Oh well,” he thought. It wasn’t as if this was a new situation, but he felt bad since he couldn’t tell if Nilanjana wanted him to hang around them or leave them alone. People always said it was fine and they’d repeat that over and over if he asked and then later on they would tell him they were hinting for him to leave. “Bloody neurotypicals,” he thought and immediately felt bad because he really did like both Nilanjana and Darryl. He just found their way of communicating frustrating.
He decided to play it safe and Carlos made his excuses to leave the couple be.
The wind tugged at his long locks of perfect perfect hair as he stood in line for what he thought was probably candy floss. “That’s what you do at carnival’s right? It feels like something I ought to do,” he thought to himself as he saw the giant flashing sign advertising candy floss that was the same colour as the lab coat that he was wearing. It was his favourite lab coat and had started to look quite worn after years of continual use. But he didn’t mind.
Night Vale was the most scientifically interesting town in America. That is reason Carlos was here in the first place. Night Vale was also quite odd. Not odd to the good citizens of the town but increasingly odd to interlopers like Carlos who are not used to its strangeness. The oddities of Night Vale made Carlos extremely wary of all common place items and he was always mildly expecting whatever mundane items they were to be twisted in some peculiar way. As he rehearsed what he was going to say to the cashier in his head he had to remind himself to be ready for anything.
“One stick of pink candy floss please,” he quickly yelled so that the cashier could hear him over the tremendous amount of noise going on around him. Even though he had just rehearsed this more then a dozen times, his hands got immediately sweaty thinking that perhaps a “stick” wasn’t the correct way to refer to candy floss. These anxious thoughts paired with the noise all around him meant that he saw the cashier move their lips but did not hear a single thing they said. “What?” he yelled. The cashier’s lips moved again, and Carlos’ brain simply shrugged at the words they could have formed. “Yes,” he yelled, hoping that that was the correct answer. Carlos held out the exact change and the cashier said something again as they took it and disappeared. While they were gone Carlos wondered what he had actually said yes to. The cashier returned and put a blue stick of fairy floss into Carlos’ sweaty hand. He thanked them and rushed away, uncomfortable from that simple interaction. With something now to chew on Carlos felt he could handle the cacophony enveloping him much easier.
It was a difficult thing to be alone at an event full of people, so Carlos set off in one direction trying to make himself look like he has places to be. As he slipped between the herds of people and not people, Carlos stared at the ground and tried his hardest to not touch anyone he passed by. Walking around like this was not a comfortable situation so he began instead to look above the crowd, which was difficult since most of the people and not people around him were much taller. Eventually in the distance he spied a glorious glorious monument.
Carlos wasted no time in changing his path to go directly towards the mesmerising sight. Around and around it went, pleasing some instinctual part of his eyes that craved to see such a smooth motion. Once he got closer it was clear it was not moving in such a fantastically smooth way but rather rocked in an anxiety inducing way. But Carlos didn’t mind. It was still a fun sight to see.
He stared up from the base of the brightly coloured Ferris wheel and longed to go on it. Crowds were such an uncomfortable situation and it would have been nice to be above all the uncomfortable eyes for just a little while. Up there he could sit and be apart of the carnival while not needing to be amongst the noise of it all. Unfortunately it seemed to him that it was a two-seat situation. Carlos couldn’t just be a single person going up on a ride that was clearly made for two people, it simply didn’t work.
For a moment he stood there wondering if he should attempt to find Nilanjana amongst the crowd and ask if she wanted to go on the Ferris wheel with him, but he doubted she would be happy leaving Darryl by himself while they did that. Before he could consider any other option a man with three mesmerizingly beautiful eyes came up to him and started talking. Something about the man made Carlos want to stare into those eyes for a long time. His skin was dark, and he smiled with such a genuine friendliness – Carlos immediately began to feel butterflies in his stomach. “What,” was all Carlos could mutter in response as he realised he had been staring too long into the man’s eyes and immediately looked down once again.
“Oh, well I really want to go on the Ferris wheel but I’m a bit nervous and I’m trying to find someone who’d like to go on with me.” The man repeated his words in a deep voice that Carlos found immediately relaxing.
Carlos took a few moment to process what the man was saying. Of course he wanted to go on the Ferris wheel, but he didn’t really know this guy and talking to him would probably be uncomfortable even if he had the most comforting voice he had ever heard.
“Er, I’m not sure,” was all Carlos was able to say.
“Come on, it’ll be fun!”
Carlos’ mouth began to speak before his brain had fully agreed to this idea, “Okay, yeah sure.” He swore, “Nitrous Oxide,” in his head repeatedly.
“Awesome!” the man grabbed his hand and pulled him over to the ticket booth. Carlos immediately pulled his hand away. “Two tickets for the Ferris wheel please,” the man said to a small creature that seemed to be inhabiting the ticket booth.
Carlos fumbled in his pockets, his hands shaking as he got out his wallet and tried to find the exact change but before he could find it the man turned to him and said, “Don’t worry, it’s on me,” and handed Carlos a small red ticket.
“Thank you,” Carlos replied, feeling bad that he didn’t get his money out in time.
“Come on,” the man said as he gestured for Carlos to follow him into the line at the base of the ride. “So, since we’re going to be spending the next while together I guess I should introduce myself. I’m Cecil and I love your lab coat.”
“My name’s Carlos and your tattoos are very pretty.”
Cecil looked down at his right arm like he had never seen it before, “Oh thank you.”
“Here’s the money for the ride by the way,” Carlos said as he reached out with the exact change that he had worked out as he had been standing there.
“Oh, don’t worry about. Consider it my payment to you for accompanying me on this ride. I’m terribly afraid of heights by the way, so I apologise in advance for if I freak out up there.”
“Well I’m happy being moral support.”
“Ooo the line’s moving!”
A gentle stream of chattering couples wandered off the ride and a three armed man dressed like it was still the ‘70s helped the next people on.
“First in line, yay! I love being first in line, it makes me feel like I’m winning,” Cecil said this with a laugh, but Carlos could see his hands were trembling. “Sorry I keep rambling, I do that when I get nervous. Tell me to shut up whenever you like. Oh look I think we’re going on now.”
The ‘70s dressed man gestured them forward and once they had sat down next to each other he pulled a bar over them.
“Shit, I think I made a mistake,” Cecil muttered as the Ferris wheel lifted them a few metres off the ground. This unexpected social interaction had made Carlos increasingly uncomfortable but something about this man he had only just met made him want to make him feel safe but physical contact usually hurt him and he didn’t know how else to help.
“It’s okay if you want to close your eyes? I can let you know when we’ve got back to the ground again?”
“No no no, it’s all good, I’m all fine, I can do this, we can do this.” As Cecil said this his knee went up and down so quickly it barely seemed to move at all.
The Ferris wheel slowly made its way up and up until Carlos could see practically the entire carnival from his vantage point. “Oh wow, that’s incredible. I can see all the way to Old Woman Josie’s house!” He looked over to Cecil to see if he was also seeing all the definitely-not-angels lurking around, but Cecil seemed to have his eyes tightly squeezed shut. Even if Cecil was terrified, it was nice to have company that seemed to want him there.
Carlos’ dark brown eyes surveyed the mayhem surrounding the Ferris wheel with fascination. The carnival had been set up on the outskirts of town since the City Council had forbidden the curious interlopers from entering the city limits. Beyond the lights and screams of the carnival ley a barren desert that quickly disappeared into utter darkness. For a moment Carlos could even have sworn he saw a man with a tan jacket and deerskin suitcase running full speed into the darkness. But he must have been mistaken.
Rusted hinges made loud screeching noises as the wind moved the seat violently. A knot formed in Carlos’ stomach and adrenaline trickled slowly into his veins. That sound definitely did not seem good. Sweaty hands tightened on the cold bar in front of him as the Ferris wheel creaked suddenly to a halt at the highest point. The air was colder up here, and Carlos wrapped his hot pink lab coat tightly around his arms. Glancing nervously at Cecil, Carlos realised Cecil was shaking. “Oh beakers! Are you okay?”
“Er, I think I may have made a mistake by getting on here. You don’t think it’s going to fall apart do you?”
“No, I think that is highly improbable.”
“Yeahh?” Cecil said shakily.
“Yeah. These rides have regular maintenance and when something goes wrong we just get stuck up here a while, that’s all.”
“Oh-oh yeah.” One eye opened cautiously and was soon followed by the other two. “You know, the view is pretty neat.” A comfortable silence settled for a few moments as they both looked out onto the chaos below them.
“You’re still shaking, are you cold?”
Cecil’s laugh was disarming but had an audibly frozen chatter to the edges of it, “Haha, just a bit.”
Carlos’ eyes suddenly become very preoccupied with his feet. “I can warm you up… if you want?” he said.
“That, that would be nice.” Carlos glanced up at that moment and caught Cecil’s infectious smile as they both inched closer together. His heart was loud in his ears as their legs settled next to each other and he could feel Cecil’s warmth so close to him. Such comforting warmth.
Carlos’ touch aversion had never been very consistent, but it was still very unusual for this sort of contact not to make his skin crawl. He decided an experiment was in order and slowly slid his hand so that it was brushing Cecil’s knee.
“I’m still feeling a bit scared,” Cecil whispered out into the darkness.
Carlos’ stomach sat in his throat uncomfortably, “Would holding hands help…?”
“Absolutely.” Cecil grinned and took Carlos’ sweaty hand in his without hesitation and gave it a gentle squeeze.
This experiment was going wonderfully. The effect on his heart was incredible and very possibly heart attack inducing. Anxious thoughts kept sprouting up about whether his hand was too sweaty, however Cecil’s presence made those thoughts so much less potent. Perhaps he should push this experiment further?
Carlos leaned into Cecil and soon even began an investigation on how it would feel to lean his head on Cecil’s shoulders. “You have such large hands,” Carlos said as he squeezed Cecil’s hand again.
Cecil returned the squeeze and laughed, “Thank you. You have very nice hair.”
“Well… you seem very strong, I bet you could pick me up.”
“If this darned thing starts moving and we get to see the ground again, we can test your theory.”
“It really is just not moving.”
“What’s it been? Like, 10 minutes? An hour?”
This made Carlos chuckle slightly, “Time is weird in Night Vale.”
“Time is very weird in Night Vale.”
“So, er, if we’re up here for a while we may as well get to know each other better.” Carlos could feel Cecil move his face to look at him.
“What were you thinking…?”
Carlos moved his head away from the warmth of Cecil’s neck and looked into the mesmerising eye that sat in the middle of Cecil’s forehead. Cecil’s raised eyebrows confused Carlos as he knew that he may have accidently entered the world of Hinting and his mind raced trying to think of what Cecil’s expression could have meant. He gave up and thought of a question to ask. “Well, do you have siblings?”
Cecil looked away and Carlos couldn’t help but feel that he had missed something but couldn’t tell what.
“Yeah, I have an older sister Abby, how about you?”
“Oh cool! I’m the youngest as well, two older sisters. Your turn.”
“My turn?”
“Ask me a question.”
“Um, give me a second, I want to think of a good one.” Cecil scrunched up his face in the cutest way before saying, “Okay so, what sort of tree would you want to be turned into?”
Without missing a beat Carlos replied, “A Chinese Ginkgo tree for sure.”
“I don’t think I’ve heard of those?”
“They are incredible! They’re practically living fossils from the Jurassic time and they’re deciduous and, and…” Carlos trailed off as he realised he was info dumping but couldn’t help but keep going, “and they sometimes have all yellow leaves and they grow to be really tall and I’d love to be that tall and,” he managed to stop himself before he repeated a whole wiki article on them, “They’re just as cool as a cube of copper in a cryostat honestly.”
“That sounds so neat!”
“What tree would you like to be turned into?”
“Ohh I know just the one! It has bark as rainbow as me, it’s some sort of Eucalyptus?”
“Yes I know the one you mean! Er, I follow an Instagram that posts fun facts for Pride Month and they mentioned it, umm, I think it’s something like delgootar?”
“Eucalyptus deglupta! I remembered it!”
“Nice! I can’t believe rainbow trees really exist, it’s so cool.”
“It really is, okay, your turn.”
“Um, what’s your biggest fear?”
“Oh mirrors, absolutely, they are terrifying.”
“I completely agree. I think mine would probably be not finishing a study once I had begun it. Like, what if I died before finding the answer to something? That would be horrifying!”
“Oh what sorts of studies do you do?”
“I’m a scientist, I study science.”
“That’s so neat! You know, I’m very into science.”
“Are you a scientist too?”
“Oh, ah, no, I’m a journalist. I host the Night Vale Community Radio, and I was actually thinking about bringing someone in to do the Fun Fact Science Corner segment of the show.”
“Oh really?”
“Yeah… you wouldn’t be interested in that would you?”
“Me? That’d be just wonderful!”
“Well, I guess I’m going to need your phone number then.”
Cecil fumbled to get his phone out of his pocket. Their hands brushed as Carlos took it and put his number in.
“So, who’s turn is it?” Cecil asked, his breath hitting Carlos’ cheek and making him conscious of how close Cecil and his soft lips were. Carlos gazed at Cecil, transfixed, heart twisting with every beat, knowing that no matter how close Cecil seemed, he would never be able to move that little bit closer.
“Carlos?” Cecil repeated in his smooth, sonorous voice. However, Carlos stayed oblivious as his mind thought about a hundred scenarios in which he was not the incredibly anxious person that he was.
“Carlos?” Cecil repeated again, softer this time. He lifted his hand slowly to touch Carlos’s dark and delicate cheek.
Carlos leant into the warmth of Cecil’s hand and whispered back, “Yes?”
“Can I..” Cecil trailed off and his face went from pink from the cold to red with embarrassment.
“Yes?”
Cecil leant in so close the Carlos could feel his breath on his face.
In that moment, with Carlos’ heart loudly beating and Cecil’s hand on his cheek, in that moment, the Ferris Wheel screeched back to life and sent the chair to violently rock back and forth again. The movement was so sudden that Carlos fell, face first, directly into Cecil’s face. Without even meaning to their lips met clumsily and Carlos jerked away automatically.
“I’m so sorry-” Carlos began to say before Cecil grabbed Carlos and pulled him close, kissing him hard. Carlos’ brain simultaneously froze and moved frantically but once he had time to register that this was not a fantasy and actually happening, he managed to kiss back.
Cecil’s lips were soft and warm. Nothing felt as natural as having this stranger’s hand tousling his long hair into a fabulous mess.
Neither knew how long the kiss lasted but both were disappointed when the they realised it was almost their turn to hop off.
Moving his face away from Cecil’s for a moment, Carlos not only immediately regretted it, but could see clear dismay in all three of Cecil’s eyes. “Would you like to go get some food together?”
“I would like that very much,” he replied with a grin.
Just in these few moment of parting, Carlos could already feel himself missing the feel of Cecil’s lips on his own, so he made the unusually spontaneous decision to lean in for one last kiss before he took the handsome stranger beside him out for some food.