Work Text:
Well, let me get you all on the same terms! I’ll tell you what I saw…
I was walking down to the living room of the dorms, because it was late at night, and I was hoping the girls would be down there hanging out and laughing in their pajamas! It would have been so mad hot to see. Too bad for me though, because all I got to see was Midoriya and Daddy Issues making out! I remember it as a bad dream… it makes me wanna vomit. I had to look at one of my favorite girls' magazines to feel even slightly better. The gays were so close and I had to see if it would happen again.
So I, Mineta Minoru, waited another night.
Surprise to me, (not!) because I caught them making out again! Daddy Issues was nibbling on Midoriya’s ear at one point and oh how sad! He’s the hottest guy in school! Everyone- every girl- would love to make out with him! He could get all of the girls at once, kiss them… smell their hair… t-touch their boo-!
“Mineta.”
A low growl came from on the couch, and Daddy Issues was staring at me! His gay counterpart looked at me too! He was so red in the face, it disgusted me. How could someone make out with another guy and think it’s hot? Gross! Ew ew ew ewewew EW! The only sexy, hot thing are girls in their bathing suits… ahh….. so-! “Get out of here, now.” Todoroki spat.
Mineta wasn’t scared… he was intimidated… he wasn’t scared wasn’t scared...“Go. Now!”
“Wahhhhhhh!!!! You guys are so grosssssss!!!!!!” I cried as I ran back to my room.
I wouldn’t be made a fool!
I’ll get my revenge.
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Law & Order Sound Effect (HQ) [+Download Link]
The next day…
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Endeavor almost kicked down the door when he heard a knock, instead, thrashing it open, only to see a ball of pathetic grapes at his feet.
“Endeavor, Endeavor! I have something you need to know!”
Endeavor narrowed his eyes, but let the little squeaky mouse in, slamming the door shut as they stood off in the living room.
“What.” He growled.
Mineta cleared his throat and looked to the ground, before staring up a hard gaze into Endeavor's eyes.
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8 hours of Law and Order theme
Intense music starts to play.
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“Your son…” Mineta mutters.
Endeavor narrows his eyes.
“He’s… gay.”
.
.
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“No! He isn’t gay. Not my perfect creation! I will not stand for this lie. Do not come in front of me and stand in my house only to spit out fake fantasies of your own.”
- Undertale - Megalovania -
Mineta suddenly seemed afraid and waved his hands as he cried, “I-I’m not lying Endeavor! He is gay! He was making out with Midoriy-!”
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Endeavor's voice only managed to boom louder as his foot hit the floor. “MY SON. WAS NOT. MAKING OUT. WITH ALL MIGHTS. PROTEGE.”
Another stomp shook the floor, and Mineta bounced.
“MY SON. ISN’T. GAY!” Endeavor howled.
[beat drop]
Endeavor started to stomp on the floor, trying to squish the ball of grapes to the ground, but he kept running.
“GET BACK HERE!!!!” Endeavor screamed, as ceramic plates shook and fell to the ground.
Mineta in all his crying glory kept trying to run away, but it was in vain. “He’s gay I tell you! Anime high school level gay, Endeavor!!” Mineta said as he continued on his run. This, (obviously,) made Endeavor even madder, and he was able to stomp on Mineta with his big foot, making the boy turn into grape juice.
kono shoto todoroki niwa yume ga aru
“Yes! I’ve wo-”! Endeavors eyes bulged out of their sockets.
Nani!?!?
.
.
.
This couldn’t be?!
.
.
.
h o w did this HAPPEN!
.
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HIS FIREEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT WAS GOING OUT!!
“Nooooooo!!! This isn’t FAIRRRRRR!!!!!” Endeavor howled as his flames went back to nothing and he melted into the ground, Endeavor juice mixing with the Grape Juice. “I WILL NOT BE CONQUERED!!!!!! THIS CANNOT BE THE END-!”
Why are we still here, just to suffer
The end.