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Merle’s awake long before his kiddos come calling.
It’s hard to sleep when the pain of amputation is still so fresh. He hasn’t even had a day with his new arm, and he’s already found that nights will be the hardest to get through.
It’s in the dead of night when the phantom pains start stirring, a dull ache that travels up the length of his arm and back down again. He’s just tired enough that it’s not worth getting out of bed, and it’s just painful enough to make his sleep less than restful.
The pain only sharpens his senses, making every little noise twice as loud. It’s like his brain is looking for more excuses to stay awake. He hears Taako stirring, the springs of the mattress creaking, like he’s suddenly jolted upright.
Merle turns on his side, away from the noise. The pitter-patter of feet is quick to follow, heading straight for Magnus’s room.
He sighs. It’s not worth it to let jealousy get the better of him, but he can’t help but feel a little isolated, knowing that both Magnus and Taako are awake and he’s still alone. He’s come to terms with being second best, but it’s nights like this where that knowledge stings a little more.
His door creaks open, and he becomes aware of the two pairs of feet shuffling in the doorway.
“Emmy?” calls one tiny voice.
“Mimi?” calls another.
They’re standing side by side in the doorway, gripping onto each other for dear life. Taako’s clearly older, judging by the way he’s tugging Magnus along, but neither of them can be older than five. That’s so teeny for the two of them. Poor things must still be frightened.
“Hey, kids.” He sits up slowly, careful not to make it obvious that he was already awake. It would only worry them more.
Taako’s eyes follow his every movement. He’s been doing that a lot recently, like he’s looking for the slightest sign of Merle not being able to handle him. Or at least, that’s what Merle thinks. It would explain why Taako made it this long without regressing once, when he’d spent most of their Candlenights party prior half-small.
It’s too dark for Magnus to see, so he just keeps his eyes downcast, his brow furrowed with obvious worry.
“Come here, the both of you. One on each side. Easy.”
“Still hurts?” Taako asks. He nudges Magnus toward Merle’s good side and gingerly climbs over to his right.
“It’s not bad.” Merle says, which doesn’t stop Taako from curling up beside him, pillowing his head with his arms instead of snuggling against Merle’s chest. “No worries.”
Taako hums, making that sound like he doesn’t quite believe that, but says nothing else. It isn’t hard to guess why, when Magnus practically melts against him. Is it that he so badly wants to believe Merle is okay that the words soothe him so easily? Or is he just that small?
“Really, I’m okay.” Merle promises, lowering his voice a notch. He doesn’t suppose it matters. Magnus has already begun to snore.
Taako’s always the hardest to lie to. It takes a liar to spot a liar, he supposes. The point is, nine times out of ten, he sees right through Merle, and now is no different.
“Can leave if you want space.” Taako mumbles.
“You most certainly will not.” Merle says in the firmest voice he can manage while whispering.
“But you’re hurt and we’re needy.”
“And? Time with my little buddy is just what the doctor ordered.”
A tiny grin comes to Taako’s face. It’s working, even if he doesn’t want to admit it. “I don’t think Ms. Alaina said that.”
“She did.” He nods to Taako. “Come on, buddy, bring it in.”
Taako shuffles in, slowly, like he’s navigating through tripwires or broken glass. Each movement is stilted and slow. As he settles with his head on Merle’s shoulder, it’s clear he’s only putting a fraction on his weight down.
“It’s really okay.” Merle promises. “It doesn’t even hurt anymore.”
“That’s a fib.” Taako says quietly, but he sinks a little deeper into Merle’s shoulder.
“Yeah, but if I told you about every time I was hurting, Lucretia would probably ban me from adventuring. Almost everything hurts at my age.”
Taako’s lips twist, like he doesn’t quite like hearing that. “Go to sleep, Emmy,” he says after a moment of deliberation, and Merle has no choice but to go along with it.
When Merle awakes, his bed is empty. And like any good parent, he immediately suspects something is wrong.
As volatile as Taako’s headspace is, he doesn’t normally leave in the middle of the night. Sometimes Magnus will retreat to his own room after resurfacing, but more often than not he’ll at least stick around until the morning.
The only sign that either of them were even here is a card, set gingerly on his nightstand. Merle rolls his shoulders, feeling a familiar crick in his neck, and takes the card.
The art styles were completely different, as if both of them had worked on each side separately. They each signed their names, Taako on the left page and Magnus on the right.
Magnus’s side is littered with doodles. Doodles of the three of them hugging, of Merle juggling, and inexplicably, many pictures of dogs. His side reads:
Things you can do with only one arm:
- Give good hugs
- Win at arm wrestling
- Really cool juggling
- Jokes whenever someone asks for a hand
Taako’s handwriting is smaller and neater, but there are fewer drawings. It looks like he dipped into Magnus’s sticker stash to fill up space. His side just has the recipe for his award-winning french onion soup and a coupon that says Good for one “not today, Taako.” Present this at the time of exhaustion and I Will Stop. There’s a little angel drawn in the corner—complete, of course, with a wizard hat.
Merle grins. He’ll have to find some place special to put this card, both where he and the kiddos can see and where it won’t risk getting damaged.
Voices trickle in from the kitchen.
“No, we can’t do pancakes!” Taako says, sounding no older than he did last night.
“Why not?” Magnus sounds equally small.
“You need a fork and knife to cut pancakes! Two hands?”
“He’s got two hands!”
“Yeah, but one of them is still new and he might feel bad if we make him think of that.”
“It’s more fun to eat pancakes with your hands anyway.”
Taako makes a noise of disgust. “No. No pancakes.”
“We could do bacon.”
“Aren’t followers of Pan vegetarians?”
“They like nature more, so maybe they’re anti-vegetarians?”
“You got a point. Plus Merle likes plants better. We shouldn’t make him eat those.”
Merle grins. They’re certainly putting a lot of thought into this.
“Koko, don’t you have a special scrambled egg recipe? We could do that!”
“I…I can’t.”
“What do you mean you can’t?”
“I just can’t, okay? I’ll tell you everything to do, but I’m not touching it. You can even tell Emmy you made it yourself.”
“O-okay.” This sounds as much of a surprise to Magnus as it is to Merle. “What do I do then?”
Merle sinks back into his mattress, letting himself doze to the sounds of their voices. He doesn’t want to ruin their surprise, so he stays put. Lucretia would probably have his head if she found out he was letting both kiddos run wild in the kitchen unsupervised, but he’s comfy and they sound perfectly capable. And if she does, he’ll just have to kindly remind her how he lost an arm.
“That’s too much salt!” Taako says it with the same urgency he’d tell someone the building was on fire.
“Oh no! What do I do?”
“Add rosemary. Can you do that?”
“Yeah!” There’s a clattering that follows, which sounds like everything being arranged on a tray.
“Good. I’m gonna wake up Emmy.”
Merle sits up, hastily attaching his wooden arm. If he won’t need it for eating, he surely will for hugs.
Taako pokes his head in, surprised to see Merle awake. For a second he hesitates, like he’s trying to figure out what to do from here.
“Morning, kiddo.” Merle offers a kind smile, pretending not to notice the way Taako’s eyes keep flitting to his wooden prosthetic.
“Morning.” He shrinks back, the tips of his ears burning pink. “You liked your card?”
“I did. You’ll have to make that soup for me sometime.”
“Maybe…” Taako says, in that way that betrays how badly he doesn’t want to do whatever’s been asked of him. His eyes flit to the kitchen and back. “Are you hungry?”
“I was just about to get breakfast.” He leans forward, pretending like he’s about to climb out of bed. His right arm groans in protest—not as loudly as last night, but still loud enough he can’t ignore it.
“No no no! Hold still!” Taako holds out his hands, like he’s going to magic Merle in place. The fact that this is going according to plan puts him at ease, and he cracks a grin. “I’ll be right back.”
He scurries out of the room, returning only a few moments later with Magnus at his heels. Magnus moves much slower, trying to be careful with the tray he’s carrying. He can tell at a glance who poured which drink, between the filled to the brim glass of orange juice and the half-drunk glass of wine.
He’s grinning like an idiot before he can stop himself. “Wow! I can’t believe I slept through you two making all this!”
“Yeah!” Magnus agrees. Taako, who sees through the lie the second Merle says it, stays silent only for Magnus’s sake. He sticks his tongue out in concentration as he gently lowers the tray onto Merle’s lap. “Me and Koko made it together!”
“That’s very thoughtful of you two.” Merle takes the fork, which is artfully arranged on top of a neatly folded napkin, and digs in.
Magnus takes a sidelong glance at Taako, and when Taako says nothing, blurts, “Koko’s really worried about you!”
Taako gasps, the tips of his ears turning bright red. “Maggie!”
“You said you were gonna tell him! You pinkie promised!” Magnus pouts.
“I was getting to it.” Taako folds his arms and scowls. “You just didn’t give me enough time.”
“What’s all this now?” Merle takes a quick chug of his orange juice so he doesn’t have to worry about it spilling and pats the empty space on his bed.
Magnus clears his throat accusingly, and Taako ducks his head. He sits stiffly, careful not to disrupt anything. The springs barely move under his weight. “Was worried about you.”
Merle chuckles. “It takes a lot more than a grim reaper with a bounty to collect to take me out.”
“I know, but…” He fists his hands in his cloak, trailing off.
Magnus speaks up again. “He was worried you wouldn’t want us anymore.”
“Maggie!”
“What?”
“You can’t just say that!”
“Why not? It’s true!”
“It sounds bratty!” Taako’s fists move from his cloak to the brim of his hat, which he pulls down to shield his face. It only slightly muffles his voice, but he’s speaking so softly his voice is barely audible. “It’s a lot of work and I wanted you to know it’s okay if you don’t wanna play with us anymore.”
Merle feigns offense, tapping into his Taako-dramatics. “Is that what this is? You’re firing me over breakfast so I don’t make a scene?” He sniffles dramatically. “How could you?”
Taako gasps, letting go of his hat. From the look on his face, Merle’s plan has worked like a charm. At least for the moment, he’s forgotten Maggie’s there to bicker with, which means he’s slipped into a younger, more honest headspace. “We didn’t mean it, Emmy! Just wanted to prove we could take care of you as good as you take care of us!”
“Aww! Come here, you.” He loops an arm around Taako’s shoulder, tugging him in to better kiss his forehead. “Come here, you.” He does the same for Magnus.
He waits until his kids are settled in, one on each side, before continuing with his little speech. Taako’s face went red upon remembering Maggie was there, but he doesn’t age up at all. On the contrary, he only clings to Merle all the tighter.
“You two don’t worry about me, okay? Having you boys around last night was the only thing that actually helped me to sleep.”
“Really?”
“Of course! I’m glad my little buddy has my back.” He turns to Magnus. “And my little fighter, no matter how axe-happy he may be. You two take care of me without even realizing it, understand?”
He looks to Taako, who nods, his thumb creeping closer and closer to his lips.
“The only thing that’s going to change is that I reserve the right to not have to carry your scrawny butt back to bed when you’re too tired to walk.”
Taako offers a little smile.
“Now, can I please eat my eggs before they go cold?”