Work Text:
"Whirl, get those energon treats I put in the freezer last night for the table!" Tailgate called, pushing the couch back toward the wall. The room was starting to feel crowded.
"I've kinda got my claws full over here!"
"Cyclonus?" Tailgate called instead, letting go of the couch and rushing to the door as the bell rang yet again.
"Busy!" came the reply.
"Wazzpinator will get them!" Waspinator said, chipper, as he shuffled toward the kitchen.
"Waspinator, you're our guest, you don't have to- hang on," Tailgate said, opening the door, "Drift, Rodimus! You came together!"
"Oh, uh, yeah," said Rodimus, awkwardly, "I guess we did."
"Come on in then," Tailgate said, ushering them into the foyer.
"Hey, Drift and Rodimus are here!" Anode called, waving, one of her and Lug's four sparklings clinging to her arm like a particularly determined koala.
"Who?" asked Sandstorm, who was taking up three quarters of the couch, completely slogged. One of Anode and Lug's sparklings was sitting on the arm of the couch and drawing on his hood with a pink crayon, though he didn't seem to care.
"Wazzpinator found the energon goodiezz!" Waspinator announced, trotting back into the living room holding a bowl. Arcee snagged one as he passed her on the way to drop it on the coffee table.
"And who are all of these precious gifts from Primus?" Drift cooed at Lug and Anode's brood, "You two have taken on quite the flock here."
"We've gotten pretty good at it," Lug commented, "We just really like kids, you know."
Drift sighed wistfully as he knealt down to shake hands with a little bug eyed green motorcycle, "Me and Ratty never picked any up. It never seemed like the right time."
"It's never too late," said Anode, prying the koala child off her arm and reattaching her to her side, "You could always come babysit for us if you want to give it a shot."
"I don't know if I'm qualified for that ," Drift laughed.
"Definitely start with one ," Tailgate grumbled.
"Okay, okay, I'm here, what am I getting?" Whirl said as he stumbled back into the room, a white and blue sparkling settled into his cockpit and still drying from being freshly scrubbed.
"Wazzpinator got it!" Waspinator announced proudly.
"Oh, thanks, Nators," Whirl said, and Waspinator chittered happily, clambering to coo at the little mechanoid that had reentered the room. He grabbed his claw in his servos the second it came into grabbing range and Waspinator squealed in delight.
"I'm back!" little Whirl called, opening the door.
A variety of "hi" and "hello"s sounded from around the room as she ushered in Heinrad, whom she'd picked up from in town. He wobbled into the room and directly to the table with the energon goodies on it. "What did I miss?"
"Echo purged his lil tanks," Whirl sighed, "on both of them."
"Yuck," little Whirl commented, striding over and plucking the toddler from her father's cockpit and into the crook of her arm in a deft motion, "Glad I never did that."
"Hey, you," Whirl accused teasingly, "you might not have tanks to purge, but I cleaned up plenty of scraplet residue."
"Oh, god, Dad, okay, Primus," she hissed, face lighting up pink in embarrassment, "Say hi to Uncle Waspinator, Echo," she said, changing the subject and turning toward Waspinator.
"Why do you talk funny!" Echo yelled at Waspinator in a way that suggested he hadn' yet internalized the concept of an "inside voice."
"Wazzpinator not know what zzparkling mean by thizz," Waspinator answered, playing with Echo's servos, "Wazzpinator talk normal."
"Hey, Anode," said Whirl, turning away now that the sparkling was in someone else's hands, "I was wondering if while you were here you could speak to the kids about the girl stuff, I don't got a very good understandin' of it so I don't know if I've been explainin' it too good."
"Are you kidding? We've gotten so good at the girl talk with the kids!" Anode laughed, turning over.
"Girls are cute!" yelled the child attached to her side.
"Your mom is cute," teased Lug, tickling the sparkling, who giggled.
"You know, I sort of expected you to join the femmesquad at some point," Arcee commented, plucking an energon goodie from the tray on the coffee table.
"What, me?" Whirl balked, surprised.
"Agreed," commented Lug, trying to convince the sparkling attached to Anode to let go and join her siblings on the ground.
"Huh," said Whirl, tapping his helm casing thoughtfully, "Weird."
"Though, I'm sure the second you did, Anode would be in for another frame change," Lug commented dryly, "You're so competitive, dear."
"We're back!" announced Cyclonus, returning to the room with a freshly cleaned off Reverb, purple armor scrubbed shiny.
"Oh, aren't you just adorable!" Drift purred at the spiky little sparkling, who bared his fangs at him. Drift grinned back, showing off his own, and the sparkling's optics widened like dinner plates as he stuck out his arms and made grabby hands for the ex Decepticon.
"So what's their altmodes?" Rodimus asked, grabbing an entire handful of energon goodies.
"Quadcopters," Tailgate told him, "Don't let them hover away from you, they'll fly right into the corner of the ceiling and stay there."
Drift swung Reverb around in a circle, who shrieked in joy and skittered up his arms to cling to his chestplate and gnaw on his armor straps.
"He's been teething a lot," Cyclonus sighed, "Echo didn't get the fangs, fortunately enough. I can hardly keep up with all the destruction his chewing has caused."
"Not as much as me!" little Whirl called over her shoulder.
"It's alright," Drift said, patting the sparkling's head, "I was a real anklebiter myself once."
"Ripclaw is just like that," Anode sighed, picking up one of the her tots from the floor, a red and teal Predacon chewing on a piece of piping and setting her on the arm of the couch next to her sister, "You never have enough chew toys on you, either."
As if to punctuate the statement, Ripclaw bit right through the piping, looked momentarily distraught, and then immediately turned to gnaw on Sandstorm's hood.
"Rippy, no, we don't chew people, remember-" Anode said, reaching for the little Predacon.
"She's fine," Sandstorm said, waving a servo idly, "Pass me a rust stick."
"Oh," said Anode, "Uh, okay, here."
"Thanks."
"Thanks for inviting us to the meet the kids," Rodimus told Tailgate, "They're real cute."
"Well, I figured you could use an excuse to get out, captain ," Tailgate tittered, "And I want them to meet lots of different people, you know. Don't want them lagging behind their peers trying to play Cybertronian Phone Tag."
"Fair enough," said Rodimus, "and it is good to have an excuse to get out. It's been awhile since I've been to stuff like this."
"Come over for dinner some time," Tailgate beemed, "Whirl makes an excellent cesium pasta."
"Whirl?" Rodimus repeated, uncertainly.
"He's gotten really into tactile hobbies like painting and cooking," Tailgate elaborated, "I'm a big fan. You and Drift can both come, if that isn't weird."
"I don't think it would be weird," Rodimus mused, optics cutting over to Drift, who was throwing the purple toddler into the air while he screamed "higher, higher!" as loudly as his little vocalizer would allow. "That sounds nice."
"Waspinator comes over all the time," Tailgate handwaved, "It's a delight having people over. Even if it is a bit chaotic with this many."
As if on cue, the door burst open.
"Where's the babies!" Brainstorm yelled. Echo began wailing.
"Dammit, Stormy!" Whirl hollered across the room.