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Rayla first realised she loved Callum that afternoon in the cave as he struggled to breathe during his Dark Magic induced fever.
It was a startling realisation for her.
She wasn’t really one for dwelling on her emotions, but she wasn’t stupid. She knew that the little flutters in her chest that had started as far back as that stupid boat meant she felt… something for him.
But until that point, she convinced herself it was just a fleeting fancy. Maybe he was kind of cute in a weird, dorky human way and he was funny… sometimes. He could be sweet too, especially with Ezran. And yeah, maybe she enjoyed teasing him just a little too much, but there was no harm in indulging in a little crush. It would pass.
The way her breath caught just a little when he touched her shoulder didn’t really mean anything. He was just more physical than Moonshadow elves, so of course it made her nervous when his fingers grazed her skin. He didn’t understand touch was very intimate in her culture.
And she was just being a good friend when she touched him back. It wasn’t because she really, really wanted to.
She wasn’t as good with words as he was, so it was just easier to show her support by hugging him, but it didn’t mean that she like liked him.
And those few times she thought about maybe considering what it would actually be like to kiss him were just because she had never spent this much time around a boy her age. She had always been far too busy with training for stupid things like teenage romance.
So yeah, if she was to muse upon what it would be like to actually kiss a boy, well, Callum wasn’t the absolute worst candidate.
But then he groaned and gasped for breath in a cold, unfriendly cave and she began to consider that something was truly wrong.
That he was in some real trouble, and frankly, so was she.
She had never felt panic quite like it before. She felt helpless and desperate. All of her physical skills were utterly useless as this boy she looked upon so fondly seemed to be dying before her.
The pain gripped her chest like a vice, and she struggled to breathe momentarily herself.
She pleaded with him to come back, to stay with her, to just breathe and in her terror, those forbidden words almost spilled from her lips.
She hadn’t even dared think something so brazen until she almost confessed right to him.
And then he had woken up so suddenly, completely oblivious to what had gone on. If he noticed the tender way she had been holding him, he never commented on it.
Thankfully, he had been too caught up in his newly discovered Sky Primal connection to ask much about what had happened, and she certainly wasn’t going to volunteer anything.
She had felt her nerves rise again when Ezran went back to Katolis. It was just going to be her and him now.
And Zym.
And now she knew. This was no passing fancy. She loved the dumb human.
In her naivety with such matters, she thought that was it. She loved him and that entailed blushing and little flutters in her chest. Wanting to kiss him and touch him. To be near him. Utterly disastrous attempts at flirting.
Or that still embarrassing night in the Oasis.
Their third kiss on the ambler was when she realised there was more to it.
The first kiss she was too surprised by to even have time to process her feelings.
The second she was nervous and hopeful and giddy.
But the third was when it all seemed to fall into place. The way his hands slid up her back or how they utterly melted into each other, like they had been doing this forever.
This is what love feels like, she had thought as he kissed her deeply, her heart racing in her chest.
As she tumbled through the sky, she realised there was more again. She loved Callum so much, but she had never had the chance to tell him.
She hoped he instinctively knew. He had to. He knew she wasn’t good with words like he was, but she had tried to show him what he meant to her.
In her actions. In the way she kissed him. How she took his hand at every opportunity.
The way she looked at him…
It was almost peaceful, in this moment. She couldn’t see the ground and she didn’t allow herself to imagine it rushing up to meet her.
Instead, she thought back on those few weeks spent with Callum. She had hoped they would have had more time together, but at least they had those precious few weeks.
It felt like so much longer. Like she had finally found herself and her place in the world.
And the person she wanted to live in that new world with.
She wished she could have told him…
She looked up as she slowly fell head over heels, rotating to place the Spire above her once again. She knew she was too far gone to see anything, but she could imagine that moment they spent together at the top of the Spire.
Callum had wanted to tell her something and though she was new to this whole love thing, she was pretty sure she knew what he had wanted to say.
Still, she would have liked to have heard it all the same. And to say it back.
It took her eyes a moment to focus on the speck falling impossibly fast after her and her heart leapt into her mouth when she realised it was him.
He had fallen?
No, even he wasn’t that clumsy.
He had jumped.
Jumped after her.
She stretched a hand out to him, knowing they would never reach each other.
And then he somehow had her… or she had him. She didn’t have time to process what had happened but somehow, he had saved her.
He told her he loved her, and she actually did have the chance to say it back, but the words just couldn’t describe the feeling of it.
It was all encompassing. It made her feel light and dizzy. The hair on the back of her neck stood on end as they kissed, and her heart pounded in her ears.
Afterwards, they had to talk to people, to deal with that whole battle thing that had just happened, and she just wanted to be alone with him. To bask in this new, all encompassing and bewitching feeling.
Years later, once again, she thinks this is really love. They are in the adoraburr meadow and she is walking down the makeshift aisle towards him.
She knows she has a ridiculous grin on her face, but she hasn’t been able to stop smiling since she woke, just before dawn, which considering Moonshadow weddings were held at night was really something.
He watches her approach a soft, goofy look on his own face.
They will have another, bigger ceremony in Katolis in a month but they wanted the real wedding to just be them and those people important to them.
Ethari holds her tight against him, kissing her cheek softly before he presents her to Callum.
Callum winks at her and she cannot help but laugh.
She thinks she cannot possibly love him more than in this moment, as he stands before her looking handsome and nervous and as happy as she feels.
She’s marrying her best friend. Her lover. The person she cares for and respects more than anyone else in the world and she feels almost faint from the overwhelming emotion of it all.
She was truly convinced that that was it, but as she quietly exits the bathroom and enters their bedroom she realises, once again, she was wrong.
Her hair is still damp from her bath and she is wrapped in a fluffy robe.
Callum is asleep on the bed, little Tio snuggled against his chest. He has his legs pulled up around her and he cradles her tiny body with one arm.
Tio has the little fingers of one hand fisted in the fabric of his tunic. She discovered her thumb the previous night and is mindlessly sucking the appendage.
Rayla smiles and sits down next to them, reaching out to touch Tio, her hand resting ever so gently on the little girl’s back.
She looks so content and peaceful.
Rayla glances at Callum, still sleeping soundly. He looks much younger in his sleep, reminding her of that strange boy she somehow went adventuring with all those years ago.
The first boy she ever really had a crush on.
Fell in love with.
Keeps falling deeper in love with.
She smiles, thinking of how that love has changed and grown with them over the years. Matured and solidified.
How teenage passion has given way to a comfortable, steadfast adoration. She cannot remember what her life was like before loving Callum. It has become so much a part of her now that its like breathing.
She glances back at their little daughter.
Blinks away happy tears.
All those times she thought she knew what it was to love him but seeing him now, dozing with their long-awaited child she wonders if this is it?
If this time, she finally understands, or if now there’s three of them, somehow there’s room for even more.