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- innocent at age seven
“You’ve gotten so big, Tobio-chan!” Excitement lined the ocean eyes of the seven-year-old boy. He stared back in wonder at the orange haired fellow enveloping his tiny hands in theirs. He wasn’t sure if the early summer heat or his timidness resulted in the warming of his cheeks. “Don’t tell me you forgot who I am.” The older said with an unconvincing pout.
Tobio frowned slightly looking down. “I could never forget you, Hinata-san.” A light chuckle escaped Hinata’s lips.
“I know you wouldn’t.” Hinata cooed, ruffling Tobio’s raven, silky hair. He halted when singed by the heat taking over Tobio’s skin. His smile fell.
“What’s wrong Hinata-san?” Tobio asked clearly noticing the change in Hinata’s face. Quickly retaliating, Hinata shook his head, disguising himself behind a small smile.
“Nothing, my love.” He grabbed ahold of Tobio’s palm, continuing, “Let’s go to the river so you can cool down.” Tobio nodded, walking with the older; not once letting go of his warm hands.
- extraordinary at age ten
“But I was born in December… shouldn’t I be able to see the winter spirit?” Tobio asked with knitted eyebrows.
“For your information, Tobio-chan, I am much more fun than the winter spirit. You should be thankful you can’t see him.” A shiver was sent down Hinata’s spine upon remembering Tsukishima, the spirit of the winter.
“Can other people see you, Hinata-san?” Tobio asked his probable four hundredth question that day.
“Some people can, but not at the same level as you.” That statement made Tobio smile. The two were walking in the meadows located on the outskirts of Tobio’s neighborhood. The air carried a hot breeze free of any humidity. There was so much more Tobio wanted to ask Hinata, but he chose to carefully examine his figure instead; his flashy orange-colored hair which seemed to be plopped atop his head, his brown eyes that were too light to be considered brown (Tobio had never seen a pot of liquid gold in his life, but could imagine Hinata's eyes resembling one), his soft, delicate touch that radiated warmth to everything it grazed upon, his unmatched enthusiasm that could excite any soul. Extraordinary was the only way Tobio would describe his companion.
“Tobio-chan,” Hinata said disturbing his train of thought. “You okay, buddy?” Tobio pushed his damped hair away from his forehead.
“I’m feeling great.”
- lonely at age fourteen
“I thought I liked her.” Tobio muttered under his breath not sparing Hinata a glance.
“Then what?” He replied sucking in his lips to avoid ruining the mood. Tobio was concentrating on disturbing the smooth layer of dirt under his feet. With a twig, he drilled miniscule holes in a precise fashion.
“It didn’t feel right.” He turned to face Hinata that was trying everything in his might to remain serious. “You look constipated.” Tobio changed the direction of the conversation ever so nonchalantly. This resulted in hysteric laughter coming from Hinata.
“It’s nothing. I’m just sentimental, that’s all. Tobio-chan is all grown up, falling in love and all.” Hinata managed to reply, attempting to dry his wetting eyes.
“I told you, I’m not in love.” Tobio scoffed, wiping the beads of sweat on his temple. He had begun to feel slightly uneasy. “I just get lonely when you’re not here.” He whispered seemingly to himself.
“What was that Tobio-chan?!” Hinata exclaimed in an exaggerated shocked expression. “You mean you actually miss me when I’m gone?!”
“I can change my mind.” Tobio replied, returning to impaling the dirt. He always pondered on how Hinata had so much energy all the time regardless of this mid-summer heat; he was the spirit of summer and all. Tobio felt his eyes fall slightly due to fatigue.
“I will forever cherish this moment, Tobio-chan! My heart is swelling, you-” Hinata rambled with cringe-worthy enthusiasm.
“Hinata-san, can’t you stay a little longer this time?” Tobio asked, interrupting the older. Hinata’s smile fell upon meeting Tobio’s weary eyes. His pale face flushed, exposing patches of red all over his skin. His breathing was heavy, chest heaving when inhaling from his nostrils.
“Let’s go home, Tobio-chan. You don’t look so well.” Hinata suggested in a stringent tone. The air between the two grew thick.
“You didn’t answer me.” Tobio did not tear his gaze from Hinata’s. His face was expressionless, devoid of the pain, anger, and desire Hinata knew was burning inside of him.
“I didn’t answer you because you know the answer.” Hinata explained in a quiet voice. Tobio was well aware, not needing Hinata’s clarification every year, but somehow wanted to believe that there was an exception this time around. Hinata extended a hand to the sitting Tobio, but this did not faze the younger boy.
“How much time do you have left?” Tobio questioned. At this point, he struggled to keep his eyes open. The heat searing his body became unbearable.
“One week.” Hinata frankly replied. The leaves had already begun to change in color, regardless of the mid-July-like temperature. Tobio just nodded his head in silence, attempting to stand with the assistance of Hinata. They strode to Tobio’s residence without a shared word. On the brink of unconsciousness, Tobio wondered why the one he loved most had to be his body’s most despised enemy.
- lustful at age eighteen
“Just one more day.” Tobio pleaded in between heavy breaths. He looked down at the boy laying beneath him, dry shards of grass extenuating his silhouette. Hinata’s eyes were shut, chest rising and falling with every desperate intake of air.
“Tobio.” Hinata stated in between a breath. “You’ve been saying this for the past week. This is enough.” Hinata finally got the courage to open his eyes, vision lacing the boy hovering over him. Tobio’s raven hair was drenched in sweat, cheeks flushed an unhealthy shade of red, and parted lips plump and lined with moisture.
“Please, Shoyou.” With that Tobio fell into Shoyou’s sprawled figure, tucking his face into the crook of Shoyou’s neck. Just like the final piece of a puzzle, Tobio fit just right in that empty space. A gasp escaped Shoyou’s lips when Tobio trailed down his golden skin nibbling at his earlobe, down to his jaw, all the way to his collarbones. His fingers hungerly trying to find the buttons of his shirt. Shoyou, intoxicated by the heat emitting off Tobio’s body, had one arm clutched onto Tobio’s neck, the other hand raking through his damped, inky hair.
Tobio wasn’t sure if he was flying or falling. He grew high on the sensation of Shoyou’s taste, but felt his sensibility dissociating from his body. No drug could elate Tobio as much as Shoyou’s touch did. This had been the third time that week Tobio begged Shoyou to stay. Each day falling more crazed than the prior, Tobio’s hunger could not be suppressed. His greed and lust grew as the strange mid-September land grew dry. Tobio’s ocean eyes lined with appetence while his once broad, tall frame fell languished.
“Tobio, you’re burning up.” Shoyou said cupping Tobio’s feverish cheeks. Tobio leaned into Shoyou’s touch, eyes delicately shut. “I have to get you home.” Shoyou directed worrisome, attempting to sit up. Tobio, the bigger boy, ironically fell effortless into the lap of the now sitting Shoyou. At this point, Tobio was drenched in sweat, body spasming every few seconds, and breathing heavy and sporadic. Shoyou shook Tobio with tears blurring his vision. “Tobio, please get up. I’ll help you walk, I just need you to get up. Please.” Shoyou pleaded, now allowing his tears to stain his flushed face.
“Why? I like it here.” Tobio slurred a reply, eyes twinkling with fondness. Shoyou’s orange locks began to fade and facial features, unfocused. He had not eaten much that day, but felt acid rolling up his esophagus. He remembered what his mother warned him about that morning, an apparent heat wave. It made Tobio giggle.
Disregarding his mother’s warning, Tobio inched closer and closer to the embodiment of summer; his sweet, tangerine-colored hair, his liquid gold eyes, his intoxicating, succulent flavor, and his smoldering heat. It wasn’t a wave, though. It was a drape that enveloped one, nourishing them with a mirage of pleasure. Shoyo always told Tobio that he was lucky he didn’t see the winter spirit, but Tobio didn’t feel lucky at all. But, he didn’t mind feeding the addiction. He didn’t mind slowly driving himself insane. He didn’t mind flying right into the sun. He’d didn’t mind dying in the arms of the sun at that moment, avoiding another winter of withdrawals.
“Tobio.” Hinata breathed in between small weeps. Tobio’s field of vision grew hazy and unclear. Before falling unconscious, a whisper escaped his pale lips.
“Just one more day, Shoyou.”