Archive of Our Own ^beta

He’s scribbling down the last few lines of the article into his notebook when it happens. A loud clang sounds from the entrance, followed by the sound of a generator shutting down. Wei Ying looks up in disbelief as the lights overhead turn off one by one and leave complete darkness, no windows in the walls to spare a glimpse of light.

“Fuck,” he breathes, as the darkness swallows him up. “Shit. Fuck.”

Wei Ying looks around slowly, but he can't see shit. The library around him seems to be holding its breath. He knows the layout of the room; he's in the front part, near the door, where a dozen tables stand in rows for students to study or to copy from the books and articles located in the library. He's at one of those tables, his notebook and a few texts thrown about, not very orderly but there wasn't anyone else left at the library to judge him. His plan had been to fly by the library to take a few notes about Golay codes and Reed-Solomon codes, but then he got distracted by an article about the Enigma machine, which they hadn’t seen in class yet, but he had seen the movie and it’s pretty genius, he has to admit.

Anyway, after dizi practise he ran over here because he still needed to finish his cryptography assignment, which should’ve only taken him half an hour at worst, after which he was supposed to rush over to Lotus Pier for dinner. 

It’s probably close to eight now, although Wei Ying can’t be certain because his phone died on his way to class in the afternoon, and that really should’ve clued him in on the fact that today wasn’t going to be his day. He also almost dislocated his shoulder on the bus, and torn one of his favorite shirts on a door handle. Maybe he should’ve stayed in bed this morning. 

“Well,” he says, to no-one. 

Further back stand neat rows of bookcases, pushed closely together to fit in as many as possible. He tends to avoid the back as he’s not a fan of tight spaces. Or the dark.

"Calm down," he tells himself quietly.

There are no emergency lights or buttons that he can push, and he's pretty sure that pressing the light switch won't do anything. It's probably a power outage, since he made sure to get here before closing time. Nobody will come check, he had been alone for ten minutes. Even the supervisor had been gone already. She must have fun Friday night plans. Wei Ying can’t relate. Definitely not now. 

Without him having a say in it, his heartbeat picks up again. It’s too quiet.

"This is fine," he mumbles. "This is great. Exactly what I needed right now. Stuck in the library. Shit. Fine, fine, fine."

If he focuses hard enough, he almost sees something move in front of him. But that’s just the dark playing tricks on him, surely.

Wei Ying needs to do something before he goes crazy. Rambling on, he struggles up, ignoring the tremble in his legs, and takes a step forward. Nothing happens.

"See? Fine. A little dark never killed anyone, haha." With a nervous chuckle he takes another step, but instead of floor, his foot meets a chair and he launches it a few feet far, where it lands with a bang. The sound makes him jump a little as it echoes across the room. “Oops.”

"What are you doing?" a voice comes from the darkness, and Wei Ying nearly has a heart attack.

"Oh my fuck– what the hell, hello?" he calls out, when his lungs allow him to breathe again. He casts his eyes around, but still can't see anything, not even the person behind the voice. It sounded like it was coming from the bookcases, but it's equally likely that he's hallucinating already.

When the voice doesn't answer, Wei Ying sits down on the ground shakily. He wants to walk around the library, maybe try the door, but he's locked in place. It's fine. He'll stay here for the night, talk to himself, imagine voices, maybe he'll even imagine a squabble with Jiang Cheng, that's always fun.

Jiang Cheng. Tonight is supposed to be dinner night with the Jiangs, he can't afford to miss it. His sister will be worried, his brother annoyed. Uncle Jiang will be disappointed, and Madam Yu... Better not to think about her. 

Wei Ying pulls on the ends of his hair slightly, to stay in the moment. It works a little. He likes his hair. It’s longer than most men in his classes, curling around his ears, and long enough to put into a small ponytail. It’s probably a wild mess now, loose and frantic, the way he’s been feeling all afternoon. 

Playing with his hair helps. As he starts to breathe a little easier, he hears a clear footstep behind him.

Wei Ying scrambles around on the floor, too light-headed to stand, and faces the direction of the sound, when he hears another hesitant step.

"Hello?" he tries again. "Please talk to me. If you haven't noticed, I'm not really having a great time right now." He hates how pathetic he sounds.

"What are you doing?" The voice is the most wonderful sound in the world right now. His heart steadies. It sounds familiar, but he can’t place it immediately. 

"Just, uh, having a panic attack, you know? Nothing much. How about you?" He manages to sit up straighter and he tucks his legs under him, waiting for an answer.

"Did you turn off the lights?" the voice asks eventually, ignoring him.

"What?" Wei Ying is too baffled to be offended about being ignored. "Me? Why would I turn off the lights? I was just sitting here, writing."

No answer.

"Did you turn off the lights?" Wei Ying asks, just to be annoying. It's his greatest quality after all. That’s what everyone says, anyway. Secretly, he thinks his good looks and his charm are his greatest qualities, but it’s not something he can use right now.

"No," the voice replies curtly.

"Well, what were you doing then?"

"Searching for a book."

"Wow," Wei Ying replies with a roll of his eyes. The stranger is not very talkative. Just his luck. "In the library? What a surprise."

"You asked." Even though it sounds more irritated than sarcastic, it makes Wei Ying laugh a little. Maybe they aren't so bad after all. 

There's another step, the person is coming closer. It's more comforting than before. It’s probably not a murderer hiding in the dark, causing a power outage to kill this unsuspecting, handsome, charismatic person. 

"Have you tried the door?" the stranger asks. 

"No," he says.

Silence. Then, "Why not?"

"Well," Wei Ying drags the word out. "I don't know if you've noticed but I'm sitting on the floor. And I don’t really want to get up right now. Sorry."

"Why not?"

So the stranger is curious, huh?

"You're suddenly asking a lot of questions, disembodied voice. Not a murderer then?"

After a pause, when Wei Ying thinks he's annoyed the person into silence again, the voice says, "I apologize."

"Huh? It's fine, I was just teasing. I don't feel like standing, you can check."

"Mn." The person starts walking, their steps coming closer, then passing by, and going towards where the door should be. Wei Ying hears some shuffling, the door being pushed, then nothing.

"Well?" he asks, knowing the answer already from the lack of noise or light.

"Locked."

Wei Ying sighs. "Yeah."

"Power outage," the person says, confirming his suspicions. "The door was locked automatically, along with the lights going out."

"Great. Probably Wen Chao again, that asshole."

"Hm?" the voice inquires, joined by footsteps.

"Yeah, last month he caused a power outage with that stupid electric flamethrower he's engineering. Inconveniencing everyone again, what a surprise. I can't believe he hasn't been expelled yet. He's awful."

Wen Chao deserves being locked into the library way more than Wei Ying, in his humble opinion. He really is an asshole. Thankfully, not all Wens are like that. Actually, Wen Qing can be an asshole to Wei Ying too, but he probably deserves it.

"Mn," the voice seems to agree. Wei Ying hopes so, at least.

Wait. "You're not a friend of his, are you?"

"No." It’s a very resolute answer.

He breathes in relief. "Oh thank fuck. That'd be awkward. And annoying. I don't want to spend a night in the library with someone who likes Wen Chao."

There's no reply. Wei Ying decides to keep talking. "Hey, by the way, thanks for distracting me. I'm feeling better now. Your voice does miracles for my heart."

Still no reply. Maybe that was a bit much. 

"So, uh, who are you?"

"Wei Ying," the voice says. Wow. He’s never heard his name spoken like that before. Or maybe he has. The library echoes it nicely.

 "That can't be right, I’m Wei Ying. Are you me from the future? A doppelgänger maybe? Are you going to have to kill me now that I know your identity? That's gonna suck."

"Don't joke."

Wei Ying huffs and crosses his arms. "How do you know my name?"

"We share a class."

"Oh." He tries to think who it could be but his mind comes up empty. It’s Friday night, he can’t be blamed. "Which class?"

"Psychology."

"Oh the choice subject? So you're not studying computer science then."

"I am a language major. Focused on romance languages."

Wei Ying laughs. "What, the love languages? I didn't know that was a course."

There's another pause. "Latin languages. Spanish, French, Italian."

"Oh. I knew that." Slightly embarrassed, he continues on, "So you're in my psychology class. Definitely not Jin Zixun, I know that much. You're not Su She, are you?"

"No."

He smiles. "Good. I don't really like him, he tries too much. He also seems like he's constantly..." he trails off. "Wait. Lan Zhan?"

It can’t be.

"Mn."

Huh. 

"Oh! I should've known from your 'mn's. You don't speak much during class, though. You have a really nice voice, Lan Zhan!"

Lan Zhan doesn't say anything else. Wei Ying doesn't know him really well, they only share one class, and Lan Zhan doesn't seem to like him very much. Before and after class, he’s tried a few times to start a conversation with him, but Lan Zhan always either ignores him, or answers with one word at a time with a deep frown on his face. He’s also tried teasing, even flirting, but he never gets a reaction out of him. Each time, the disappointment settles heavier. 

"Sorry, Lan Zhan. I'm probably the last person that you'd want to be locked up with."

"It's fine," Lan Zhan replies. He's probably gritting his teeth and wishing he were anywhere else. Wei Ying as well, but it’s not because of Lan Zhan. On the contrary, Lan Zhan is the one keeping him sane right now. 

He babbles on. "Sure," he says. "It's just that you never really talk to me and whenever I'm rambling in class you always have that annoyed look on your face. But that's okay! A lot of people find me annoying, I'm used to it. But I think you're really cool, Lan Zhan. I mean, everyone thinks that, but still. You're so elegant and proper and you always wear really nice clothes, I love the blue, and your eyes are really pretty, and every time you–"

"Wei Ying," Lan Zhan interrupts him.

"Oh shit, sorry. The dark is really not doing me any favors, I'm just rambling and rambling without a filter. I think it's because I can't see you, because if I was looking straight at you, my brain probably won't let me say anything and just stare, you know? You have that effect on people. Not on Jiang Cheng, though, but he's–"

"Wei Ying."

"Ah..." He wants to dig a hole and throw himself in it. "Sorry. That was embarrassing. I'm just... nervous. Silence and darkness are not a good combo for me, Lan Zhan. Anyway." He finally shuts himself up.

After a minute, it’s Lan Zhan who breaks the silence. “You apologize a lot.”

“Me? Pfff.” Wei Ying shrugs. He may apologize a lot, but that’s because he does a lot of dumb shit all the time.

“I do not,” Lan Zhan says.

“Huh?”

“I don’t find you or your commentary in class annoying. It’s interesting.”

“Really?” Somehow he doubts that. He’s probably just indulging him. There’s still twelve hours until the library opens again, after all. “Like what?”

“When you argued that redemption is only reserved for the higher class, I agreed with you.”

That’s… a surprise. “That was weeks ago! And you didn’t say anything, you just looked at me.”

“Mn. I should have.”

“Well. Thanks.” Wei Ying wrings his hands. Lan Zhan is always so sincere, he doesn’t know what to say.

Lan Zhan had stopped somewhere in front of him, not near enough to touch, but Wei Ying can still feel his presence. It’s calming, in a way. Maybe he should get one of those stress balls, but instead of a ball it’s a plushie of Lan Zhan and it says ‘Wei Ying’ when squeezed. That’d be cute.

He once bought Jiang Cheng a big purple stress ball as a joke. It ended up breaking a few glasses and photo frames in their apartment, because apparently it also bounced, but Jiang Cheng’s face was worth it. 

He taps his fingers rhythmically on the wooden floor. It’s not very comfortable to sit on. “Do you think we could find some candles around? I’d hate to sit here hours in the dark.”

“Not likely,” Lan Zhan answers.

“I’m gonna look anyway,” Wei Ying decides. “Uhm… Can you help me up?” His legs should be fine now, but just in case.

“Mn,” Lan Zhan replies, and he walks closer.

“Okay, hold on.” He shifts so his feet are on the floor, and reaches out a hand. “I can’t see you, sorry if I–”

“Here,” Lan Zhan interrupts him, suddenly much closer, and a warm hand encloses his own. Before he can say anything else, he’s lifted up until he’s standing, seemingly without any effort on Lan Zhan’s side. It’s not hot, he tries to tell himself.

This close, he can smell Lan Zhan. He always smells so nice. Wei Ying isn’t sure if it’s his shampoo or perfume or just his body, but he really likes it. He knows Lan Zhan is slightly taller than him, so if he took another step, he could press his face to Lan Zhan’s neck. He really shouldn’t though.

Lan Zhan shifts, Wei Ying can hear his clothes rustle, and then he’s thinking about what Lan Zhan’s wearing. He always wears these nice pants to class, matched with soft sweaters or fluffy cardigans, and Wei Ying is constantly envious of the way he looks in them. With his long, straight, ink-black hair, perfect face and slender legs, he looks like he walked out of a fashion magazine. Wei Ying actually has a bet with Nie Huaisang whether Lan Zhan models as a side job or not, but that investigation is still ongoing. Maybe he could find out today.

Then he remembers where he is and realizes he’s still holding onto Lan Zhan, and lets go quickly. As he takes a step back, he laughs it off. “Ha ha, so strong, Lan Zhan.”

“Candles,” Lan Zhan reminds him.

“Oh. Right.” He rubs his neck sheepishly. “Uhm, let’s split up, and feel around to see if we can find something? Last I looked, all the tables around me were empty, but there’s some cupboards against the wall over there, so I’ll check those first.”

“Mn. I will check Luo Qingyang’s desk.”

He blinks to process that. Who…? “That’s the supervisor’s name?” he guesses.

“Mn.”

Ah, okay. “Cool.” As he shuffles towards the left wall, where the cupboards should be, with his arms stretched before him, he continues chatting. “I’ve spoken to her a few times, but never caught her name. She’s nice, cute. Doesn’t like me very much, I think.”

He reaches the first cupboard, and messes around in the shelves. “There’s just pens in here,” he complains. “And paper. Pens. Books. Oh, what’s this?” He lifts the fabric out, and puts it on his head. “Lan Zhan! I found a beanie! So sad that I can’t find any candles, I know I look cute now.”

“Mn,” comes from the other end of the room.

“Oh, did you find something, Lan Zhan?”

A pause. “No.”

Wei Ying furrows his brows, but he lets it go and focuses on the other shelves. 

A while later, he admits defeat. There are no candles or other light sources around.

With a sigh, he sits down on the floor again. Lan Zhan moves a chair around and sits on it.

“So proper,” he teases.

“The floor will get cold,” Lan Zhan says, like any boring person would.

“I’ll be fine, I have a beanie now.” He arranges it around, tucking a few wild strands underneath. “I wonder what time it is. Don’t you have to go to bed at 9?”

Before Lan Zhan can answer, Wei Ying jumps up. “Shit, Lan Zhan! Time! Your phone! You can call someone!”

“No shouting,” Lan Zhan says.

“Lan Zhaaaaaan! Your phone!” He wants to shake him around but Lan Zhan would probably recoil from Wei Ying’s touch. 

“I don’t have it with me.”

“What?” Wei Ying stares at the black space where Lan Zhan sits somewhere. “Why not?”

“No phones allowed in the library.”

Wei Ying buries his face in his hands with a groan. Of course Lan Zhan, Mr. I-follow-the-rules, doesn’t bring his phone to the library. “Everyone brings their phones, Lan Zhan. I even saw your cousin, Lan Jingyi, play animal crossing on it yesterday.”

He’s not a snitch, but he’s trying to make a point here. What kind of person doesn’t take their phone to the library? How else are you supposed to be distracted from your school work?

“I don’t have to do what everyone else does,” Lan Zhan says with fierce determination. It’s a little cute.

“I admire that mindset, but if you’re just following the rules constantly, you still follow their lead.”

“Whose?” Lan Zhan asks, just to be a pain in the ass.

“I don’t know, the people who made the rules, shut up.” 

Lan Zhan doesn’t laugh or even exhale a tiny laugh, but somehow Wei Ying knows Lan Zhan is doing that thing with his mouth where one of his mouth corners turns up slightly. It’s adorable and it does wonderful things for his face. Wei Ying doesn’t get to see it a lot. He should make Lan Zhan do it more often.

He sits down again. “No rescue then, I guess.”

“You didn’t bring your phone?” Lan Zhan asks.

“No I did, it’s here somewhere, but it died. And I didn’t bring my charger, like an idiot.”

“Hm,” Lan Zhan hums noncommittally.

“Are you making fun of me?” he asks, incredulously. 

Lan Zhan hums again, and Wei Ying bursts out laughing. He really is funny. The total package. Wei Ying sighs wistfully.

“Did you have any plans for tonight?” he asks, a little curious. Surely Lan Zhan must have Friday night plans. He’s not the kind of guy to go clubbing maybe, but there must be something. With those looks? Come on.

Lan Zhan answers, “Work on my assignments.” 

Of course.

“Your romance assignments, Lan Zhan?” he teases.

“Mn. Mostly French.”

The most romantic language of all. Wei Ying does not blush. “Wow. So you can speak French? And English, and Chinese? That’s so hot.”

“Spanish, also. Some Italian.”

“You’re insane.”

“I like languages. Learning them comes easy to me,” Lan Zhan says. It’s not even boasting, Lan Zhan is just that good.

Wei Ying snorts. “I have enough trouble with Chinese as it is, I’d fail so hard with even more languages.” Then, because he can’t help himself, he says, “Hey, can you say something in French?”

To his surprise, Lan Zhan indulges him. “Quelque chose.”

Lan Zhan’s voice sounds even better in French. He suddenly wishes he had some kind of recorder with him, to keep that voice forever.

Lan Zhan continues when Wei Ying doesn’t say anything. “Je te souhaite seulement de bonnes choses.”

Wei Ying bites his lip to stop the moan from escaping his mouth. “Keep going.”

“Je pense que tu es la plus belle personne que j’aie jamais vue.”

“That’s beautiful,” he breathes. “Please stop or I’ll faint.”

“Mn, I’ll stop.” His voice sounds amused.

“Ahh, Lan Zhan Lan Zhan, you’re so amazing.”

“Wei Ying, as well.”

He covers his face again with his hands. “Stop that, you’re making me blush.”

“I don’t see anything.”

Wei Ying laughs again. “You’re such an asshole. What were we talking about? Oh, Friday night plans. You’re not doing anything else except assignments? How boring.”

Not that Wei Ying had any fancy plans either, but Lan Zhan doesn’t need to know.

“I play with the rabbits, sometimes.”

Wei Ying squeaks. “Rabbits?! You have rabbits? Lan Zhan! How many? What are their names? What do they look like?”

“I have two, Radish and Nebula. Radish is white with black spots, and Nebula is gray.”

“Radish?” Wei Ying shrieks with laughter. “I love it! That’s so cute! How long have you had them?”

“A little longer than a year,” Lan Zhan says, his voice softer than before. “My brother gave them to me, when he moved to his own apartment. They keep me company.”

Wei Ying’s chest constricts. He feels like he’s having a heart attack, but in a good way. Lan Zhan has bunnies! A giggle bubbles up his throat, and he has to lay down on the floor to calm down.

Some time later, when Wei Ying feels less like a little kid in a candy shop, Lan Zhan asks, “Did you have plans for tonight?”

The laughter leaves him then, and he sits up again. “Yeah. Dinner with my family. They’ll be angry I missed it again.”

Wei Ying hears a question in Lan Zhan’s silence, but he doesn’t continue. He clears his throat and grasps for a new conversation topic. “Do you want to sleep here later or are you gonna stay up until the morning?”

“What will Wei Ying do?” Lan Zhan asks instead of answering, which is very on brand for Lan Zhan.

He thinks for a few seconds. “I don’t really have plans for tomorrow and I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep here, so I’ll just stay awake.”

“Mn. I will keep you company.”

“Aww, Lan Zhan. You don’t have to, I know you Lans like your sleep. Maybe we can find a blanket somewhere.”

“It’s fine, I can stay up.”

Wei Ying smiles at him, even though Lan Zhan can’t see it. “Hey, Lan Zhan? The library opens at 8 tomorrow morning right? What are we going to do for twelve hours?”

“I am sure Wei Ying will think of something.”

Lan Zhan places too much confidence in Wei Ying, really.

“That’s not helpful and you know it.” When Lan Zhan doesn’t say anything else, he says, “Okay, I’ll compile a list in my head, and then you can choose what we do first.”

“Mn.”

As he tries to think of something to do, the silence begins to irk him again. “Lan Zhan?”

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan answers immediately, calmly.

He exhales in relief. “Oh, okay. Thought you were gone for a sec. I mean, I knew you were there, but you breathe so quietly!”

“Would you like me to make a noise?”

Wei Ying shakes his head. “No it’s fine, you shouldn’t be inconvenienced because of me being weird.”

“I don’t mind,” Lan Zhan says resolutely.

He’s thrown off balance for a second, but quickly recovers with a smile. “Ha ha, so considerate, Lan Zhan. Could you maybe… talk? Or mumble, or just make small noises?”

“I can hum.”

“That’s fine! Thank you.”

Lan Zhan starts humming a song. Wei Ying doesn’t recognize it, but it’s beautiful. He closes his eyes and focuses on the song.

Lan Zhan trails off eventually, to Wei Ying’s disappointment. He could listen to that for hours and hours. He can suddenly see the appeal in meditating, if he could put Lan Zhan’s humming on repeat. “That was really pretty. What song is it?”

He doesn’t reply immediately. Just when Wei Ying wants to change the topic, he says, “I wrote it.”

“You what?” He realizes he’s gaping but he doesn’t care. It’s not like Lan Zhan can see him. Lan Zhan has got to be kidding him. “For what instrument?”

“Guqin.”

“Ughhhh,” Wei Ying throws an arm over his head and rolls on the floor. This is too much. Lan Zhan is too much. His poor heart can’t handle it. Being stuck in the library with Lan Zhan might be the worst thing that’s ever happened to him. Or best.

“Wei Ying?” Lan Zhan inquires, unaware of the things he’s doing to Wei Ying.

“You’re so talented, Lan Zhan, I can’t stand you. Go stand in a corner or something, leave this miserable fool alone.”

There’s a sound coming from Lan Zhan that he’s never heard before. He pushes himself up quickly and leans forward. Was that… a laugh?

“Lan Zhan? Did you just laugh?”

“I did not,” Lan Zhan says, but he sounds amused.

Oh man, Wei Ying’s life is over. It’s done. He can’t go on like this. Goodbye, world. ‘Do it again,’ he wants to say. 

“Wei Ying.”

“Don’t say my name like that,” he whines. “I’m vulnerable right now.”

“Did you think of anything to do?”

Oh right. He was supposed to think of things to do. “Yes! I’ll say them one by one and you can say yes or no, alright?”

“Mn.”

“Okay. First: climbing on the bookcases and walking on top of them.” It’s the first thing he thinks of. Well, the first decent thing, at least. He loves climbing trees, climbing bookcases could be even better. Though there might be spiders on top...

“No,” Lan Zhan doesn’t hesitate.

“Come on, it can be fun!” he tries.

“No. You might hurt yourself. Or the furniture.”

Of course Lan Zhan thinks of the furniture. Such a goody two shoes.

Wei Ying huffs. “Fine. Next: playing detective! We can investigate the area and maybe we’ll find a murder weapon or a secret diary or something!” Maybe Wei Ying can pretend to get kidnapped and then Lan Zhan will be forced to come rescue him. It’s a sound plan.

“It’s dark.”

He rolls his eyes. Nevermind. “That’s what makes it fun. But yeah, we already went through everything in front, and we can’t see the books, so I guess not. What about making a book fort? Like a blanket fort but with books.” He has never made a blanket fort before, but he imagines it to be cozy. The books, though...

“No damaging the books,” Lan Zhan says. There it is. 

“Fine, fine, Mr. Lan. Office chair race through the halls?”

Lan Zhan doesn’t even bother replying. Wei Ying can feel his disapproving glare. “Jenga?” he tries.

“We are not using the books, Wei Ying.”

He groans. “No fun. The floor is lava? Where you can’t touch the floor and you have to climb...” he trails off. “You know I’m an active person, Lan Zhan, I need to do something. I can’t just sit around and talk.”

“We’ve been talking for an hour,” Lan Zhan says smartly.

“Okay, okay,” he relents. “You win. We won’t use any of the furniture or books in the room. We’ll just sit around and talk. But! You have to sit on the floor with me, I want to be on the same level as you.”

Tilting his head up constantly is starting to hurt his neck. Of course, he doesn’t need to look at Lan Zhan’s face because he can’t see it, but it’s the principle. Maybe if he tries really really hard, he’ll be able to see something. 

“Okay,” Lan Zhan agrees easily, even though only ten minutes ago he was complaining about the floor getting cold. Wei Ying rolls his eyes secretly.

There’s a rush of fabric and a joint crack that Wei Ying laughs at, and then Lan Zhan moves the chair to the side and sits down in front of him. Wei Ying reaches out with his arms and startles a little when his hands meet Lan Zhan’s arms.

“Heh. Hey, Lan Zhan,” he says awkwardly. He wasn’t actually expecting Lan Zhan to sit so close.

“Wei Ying.”

Oh man, it sounds so much worse when Lan Zhan is sitting right in front of him. Beautiful, elegant Lan Zhan, talented beyond belief, who somehow also has a sense of humor, and owns two adorable rabbits. Wei Ying is doing fine.

He clears his throat and retracts his arms, putting his hands in his lap. Lan Zhan shuffles a bit, and then his knees are touching Wei Ying’s. Fine, his brain squeaks.

There’s a tense silence between them. Lan Zhan eventually breaks it with, “And?”

“Hm?” he hums. He’s having a brain fart moment.

“What do you want to talk about?”

“Oh.” Right. He was supposed to think about normal things to do in the dark. “Uhm. We could do FMK?” As soon as the words leave his mouth, he’s already regretting them.

“What’s that?” Lan Zhan, the innocent soul, asks.

Highly aware of Lan Zhan’s knees, he answers. “It stands for Fuck, Marry, Kill. So I give you three people, you have to decide which one you would fuck, marry and kill, and then you can give me three people.”

Lan Zhan is quiet. Wei Ying curses at himself. What was he even thinking?

“We don’t have to,” he hurries. “It’s just a stupid game we do when we’re drinking.” He could really use a drink right now. Why didn’t he just bring alcohol to the library? “You know what, never mind. I don’t want to play it anyway.”

Silence stretches between them, uncomfortable this time. He desperately wants to see Lan Zhan’s face, but he’s also glad the darkness is hiding his own face.

He scrambles around in his mind for any other ideas. He doesn’t have anything useful in his bag, except for his dizi, but he’s not playing that here. Definitely not in front of Lan Zhan.

He wants to ask Lan Zhan to hum his song again, but he’s too scared to ask. “Maybe… A singing competition?”

Lan Zhan sighs audibly and Wei Ying cringes. “I’m running out of ideas,” he admits.

“Would you like to...” Lan Zhan starts hesitantly. “Debate?”

Wei Ying snorts, and suddenly they’re back to normal. “Such a nerd, Lan Zhan! But sure, let’s debate. Topic?”

Lan Zhan thinks for a second. “Redistribution of wealth?”

“Fucking hell, Lan Zhan, marry me,” he murmurs, and then he launches into his speech.

-

-

A while later, it might’ve been half an hour, it might’ve been two hours, who knows, Wei Ying finds himself laying on the floor again, one hand behind his head, one curled around his stomach from laughing too much. One of Lan Zhan’s hands has been carding through Wei Ying’s hair for the last three stories. The beanie he found lies discarded somewhere. He doesn’t even care, Lan Zhan’s hands are much better.

“And then,” he wheezes. “Then Huaisang fucking throws his hat in the river below, and runs off! We were all in hysterics. Poor Meng Yao. He deserved it, though.”

“Mn,” Lan Zhan agrees, and Wei Ying beams at him. Lan Zhan has been so nice to him this whole time, he’s not sure where that’s coming from. Lan Zhan has also been talking a lot, much more than Wei Ying is used to from him, and it’s great. He’s genuinely a good conversation partner, smart and funny and even witty. He lets Wei Ying speak, but also shows that he’s listening and interested in what he has to say. Wei Ying isn’t used to that.

He exhales happily. “If you’re going to keep playing with my hair like that, I’ll fall asleep soon,” he warns Lan Zhan.

Lan Zhan’s hand stops, and Wei Ying whines immediately. “Don’t stop! I just need a snack or something. Do you have any?”

“Hn. I had fruit with me but I’ve already eaten it.”

“That’s unfortunate,” Wei Ying pouts. “I have a snickers, though. We can share!”

“It’s okay, you can–”

“No, no,” he interrupts him. “You gotta eat something too, even if it’s just a little bit. We have to survive the entire night, Lan Zhan. I don’t want you to starve.”

There’s that tiny laugh again. Wei Ying thinks that if there is a heaven, it should just exist of Lan Zhan’s tiny laughs, and it would be the most heavenly place ever.

“Uhm, I forgot where my table was. My bag should be next to my chair.”

“I will get it,” Lan Zhan says, and he stands up and leaves with the sound of footsteps. Truly a knight in shining armor.

“Don’t take too long,” Wei Ying calls after him, even though he knows Lan Zhan doesn’t have to go far. He can't resist adding, “I miss you already.”

“Don’t tease,” Lan Zhan says when he gets back and settles down. Wei Ying reaches out and his hands meet his bag.

“I’m not teasing, I meant it,” he says, a little distracted as he rummages through his stuff for his snickers bar. “Ah-ha!” he exclaims, as he lifts the bar triumphantly. He tosses his bag aside and puts the snickers in his lap, then waves his arms around until he finds Lan Zhan’s thighs, and pushes himself up on them, until he’s sitting straight again, a bit too close but he’s hungry enough not to care. He definitely does not think about how strong Lan Zhan’s thighs feel and how much he wants to sit on them, and quickly takes his hands back.

Lan Zhan hasn’t said anything, so he probably didn’t mind. Not enough to say something about it, anyway.

He finally finds his voice again. “Hey, Lan Zhan?”

“Wei Ying.”

He shivers involuntarily. Did Lan Zhan’s voice get deeper all of the sudden? He must be imagining things. The dark is starting to get to him. He shakes his head and plasters a smile on his face. “Do you want to bite first, or can I?”

This was certainly not his brightest idea, but he's not going to scramble back now.

“Wei Ying can go first.”

“Okay,” he says happily, tearing open the package. “I’ll try to only eat half of it, I promise.”

He lifts the bar to his mouth and measures it a little with his fingers, then puts his teeth into it. He moans as he bites. He really was hungry. He's not thinking of anything else. “It’s so good, Lan Zhan.”

“No talking while eating,” Lan Zhan says, although it sounds a bit strangled. He’s probably hungry too.

“Sorry,” he says, swallowing the last bit. “Okay, your turn.” He lifts the other part up towards Lan Zhan, expecting one of his hands to meet him.

Instead, something wet wraps around his fingers and Wei Ying realizes belatedly that those are Lan Zhan’s lips and he’s eating the snickers bar from his fingers and oh fuck. Lan Zhan extracts his lips without lingering, but the damage is done. Wei Ying is truly dead and gone. He can’t even form proper thoughts anymore. How can he just go on with his life now that he knows how it feels to have Lan Zhan's lips on him?

He can hear Lan Zhan chew quietly, and he brings his hand down, staring at it in wonder even though he can’t see it. The stupid part of his brain is vowing to never wash that hand again, but then the rational part takes over and he wipes his fingers on this pants, resolutely thinking about nothing at all.

Lan Zhan hums after a while. “Good.”

Wei Ying drags his consciousness back from the sludge it was in and chuckles, though it sounds more pained than anything.

“Well,” he says, and he winces at his hoarse voice. He clears his throat and starts again. “Well. That was fun. I definitely won’t be falling asleep any time soon now. Uhm. Do you wanna play 21 questions?”

It's not a game without dangers but as long as he asks safe questions, he should be fine.

“Sure,” Lan Zhan replies after a while.

Wei Ying shakes his head to clear it and banishes all dirty thoughts out of his mind. “Alright. If you had a time machine, would you go back in time or go to the future?”

-

-

“No.”

“No is not an answer!”

“I will not answer that question,” Lan Zhan says stubbornly.

“You have to! It’s the one rule of the game!”

“No.”

“Lan Zhan! You love rules. Answer. The. Question.” He punctuates each word with a slap on the floor.

“No.”

Wei Ying groans. “Telling me your favorite rabbit won’t make the other one hate you, Lan Zhan. I promise.”

“I don’t have a favorite. It’s my turn now.”

He groans again and lets the back of his head knock the floor. His legs are sprawled out, his arms spread out like a starfish. Lan Zhan is still sitting next to him, on his right now, but his fingers have found Wei Ying’s hair again. He doesn’t complain.

“You’re so annoying, Lan Zhan.” He doesn't entirely succeed in keeping the fondness out of his voice.

Lan Zhan tugs on his hair slightly in retaliation. It doesn’t hurt, but Wei Ying still cries out. “Aiya, Lan Zhan! Stop hurting this poor man! I’m being tortured!”

“Would you like me to stop?” Lan Zhan asks, with that irritating tone of his voice that Wei Ying can already recognize as: being a little shit.

“Now he’s threatening me! Lan Zhan really is the worst.”

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan says, his voice back to that soft tone Wei Ying loves so much. “It’s my turn.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Wei Ying flops his hands around. “Go ahead. Try to be a little more original this time.”

“Hmm,” Lan Zhan hums in thought, as if he hasn’t already planned his next ten questions out. He’s not very impulsive, but that’s okay. Wei Ying can be impulsive for both of them.

After a moment, Wei Ying catches himself almost dozing off again, the fingers in his hair soothing and comforting. Almost like his sister, but different. Very different. He can’t help but think about how much he wants to keep this. Ridiculous, Lan Zhan would say.

“Why are you studying computer science?” Lan Zhan asks finally.

“Oh, easy,” he answers. “I wanted to be near Jiang Cheng. I actually wanted to do art school first, but my– I changed my mind. I didn’t want to leave my family behind, so I followed Jiang Cheng here and picked whatever seemed the most interesting. I wanted something more practical, and I also thought hey, maybe I can use art together with programming, like for digital effects, you know?”

Lan Zhan says a quiet “Mn” to show he’s still listening, so Wei Ying continues.

“Turns out computer science isn’t all that practical, there’s still a lot of studying to be done, but it’s okay. I’ll just spend all my excessive energy in the bedroom, eh Lan Zhan?” He pokes Lan Zhan’s leg.

Lan Zhan’s hands still.

“That’s a joke, Lan Zhan. At my own expense, even. Everyone knows IT nerds don’t get much action in that department.” He sighs tragically. “Even Luo Qingyang doesn’t spare me a glance, while I talk to her every time I’m here! A tragedy, I tell you.”

“Luo Qingyang is a lesbian.”

“What?” His hands slap against the floor again. He would jump up in surprise if Lan Zhan wasn’t holding onto his hair. “How do you know?”

“We talk,” Lan Zhan says dryly. Lan Zhan talks to the library's supervisor? But not to Wei Ying? It makes sense, but it still stings.

“I talk to her plenty!” he says instead.

“You didn’t even know her name.”

“I just have a bad memory,” he throws back. It's not entirely true, but it's a good excuse he likes to use. 

Wait… If Lan Zhan's friend is gay, that means the chance of Lan Zhan being not-straight is significantly higher, right? That's very useful information that he's storing away to be dealt with much later.

He continues, “And I don’t think she’s ever told me. Oh wow, she really hates me.”

Lan Zhan clicks his tongue and it’s so expressive of him that Wei Ying needs to blink a few times to process it. “You always assume everyone hates you.”

“People either love you or hate you, Lan Zhan. Madam Yu taught me that.”

Of course he doesn't believe that entirely. By now, he's pretty confident that Lan Zhan doesn't hate him, but that doesn't mean Lan Zhan likes him, or even loves him, that's...

“Ridiculous,” Lan Zhan says, but it sounds fond.

In an effort to tame his beating heart, Wei Ying says, “I’ll show you ridiculous!” He tries to jump up, not really with a plan in mind other than getting away from Lan Zhan, but Lan Zhan keeps a tight hold on his hair and pulls him back down. “Ow!”

“Stay,” Lan Zhan commands him, extremely unhelpful to Wei Ying’s current situation.

He lays down on his back again, thinking about Nie Huaisang’s older brother, who’s extremely scary. Wei Ying’s blood pressure lowers, and he can focus on Lan Zhan once more.

“My turn?” he asks with a tilt of his head.

“Mn.”

“Okay. Uhmm…” He’s reminded of their meeting, hours before, when he was surprised that someone else was there with him. “Hey, I didn’t see you come into the library today, were you here before me? I thought you were just looking for a book, but you must’ve stayed for a while.”

“Is that your question?” Lan Zhan says with that teasing voice.

“It’s conversation, Lan Zhan.”

“You’re breaking the rules.”

“Am not.”

Lan Zhan huffs. “Annoying.”

He chuckles. “Anyway, here’s my question: What book were you looking for? Why did it take so long?”

Lan Zhan doesn’t answer immediately, but his hands are still combing through Wei Ying’s hair, so he’s probably just gathering his thoughts.

“I was...” Lan Zhan says eventually. “Looking for romantic poetry.”

Romantic?

“Like...” Wei Ying hesitates. “The movement from the 18th century? Or actual love poems.”

“...The latter.”

“Oh.” For some reason, his cheeks warm up. It’s so silly, the way his body is acting like he’s got a crush. Stupid. “For class?”

“No. For… someone.”

What’s that supposed to mean? He doesn’t like it. At all. He already hates himself for the question falling out of his mouth. “Do you like someone? Like like?”

“It’s not your turn,” Lan Zhan evades.

“Oh, fuck you,” Wei Ying sighs as his eyes fall close in disappointment. Lan Zhan likes someone? Then his eyes fly open again. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I was just… curious. Sorry.”

“There’s no need to apologize.” Lan Zhan’s soothing voice combined with his massaging of Wei Ying’s scalp is really going to put Wei Ying in a trance sooner or later. Maybe that's what's going on, Lan Zhan is hypnotizing him! That's why his feelings are all over the place tonight. 

“Sorry. I mean, thank you.” He starts picking his nails. 

“There is no need for ‘thank you’ or ‘sorry’ between us.”

“Ugh!” Lan Zhan has to stop being so earnest. Wei Ying wants to run and hide his burning face, but he’s stuck. He’s glad for the darkness, now. “Stop that, Lan Zhan. You’re taking down my walls.”

Lan Zhan hums. “That’s bad?”

He huffs. The audacity.

“Very bad!” he replies. “You don’t want to know what’s behind there, trust me.” He has to steer the conversation away from that. “Anyway, it’s your turn.”

“Wei Ying.”

“I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s move on, okay?” 

“What’s wrong?”

“Lan Zhan…” he sighs. He presses a trembling finger into his thigh. Happy thoughts. His sister appears in front of him, holding a bowl of his favorite soup. Wei Ying lets himself smile a little. There’s Jiang Cheng, scowling but with a quirk of his lips that Wei Ying can recognize as amusement. Jin Zixuan appears next to his sister, Wei Ying imitates Jiang Cheng’s scowl. Wen Qing and Wen Ning sit in front of him, and he’s in a diner now, like every other week when he meets with the Wens. Nie Huaisang with a bottle of Emperor’s smile in one hand and his trademark fan in his other. Wei Ying remembers all those times in their teens, in the summer breaks, when they sneaked away to drink, to forget about those times he was alone at the house, his siblings at summer camp. 

He manages to blink it away. There’s a twinge in his chest and his ears are roaring, but it’s dark again. Lan Zhan probably didn’t even notice Wei Ying was gone for a second. He clears his throat.

“It’s your turn. Ask a question.”

“What’s wrong?” Lan Zhan asks immediately.

“Not that one. Choose another.” Please.

Lan Zhan seems to think for a while. Wei Ying thinks he’ll be okay, as long as Lan Zhan doesn’t ask about those summers in his teens. 

Then, he asks, “Why are you afraid of the dark?” Which is even worse, really.

With an indignant shout, Wei Ying sits up, pulling his hair from Lan Zhan’s grasp with a rough snap and turning around to face him. He mourns the loss for a second, then anger takes over. “You can’t ask me that.”

“Why not?” Lan Zhan asks, seemingly ignorant.

“Don’t act like a dumbass, Lan Zhan,” he raises his voice, “You’re far from stupid. I’m not telling you my deepest secrets just because we’re stuck in a fucking library.” 

He’s seething, his chest going up and down fast. How can Lan Zhan just ask him that? He needs to calm down, he knows he’s not thinking rationally and Lan Zhan didn’t mean to pry, but it’s very dark.

So dark.

“I’m not like you, okay? I’m far from perfect, my family is not perfect at all, and you dare to just come here and loosen me up and barge into my walls when I’m not looking and asking about things you don’t know anything about– you don’t have the right to sit there with your perfect face and perfect life and perfect home and your rabbits and ask me about things I’m insecure about and–”

“Wei Ying!”

“Shut up!” He’s yelling now, but he doesn’t care.

The darkness around him seems to darken, it’s overwhelming, it’s suffocating. “Shut up,” he repeats, but unsure of who he’s talking to. The dark is starting to swallow him up. Vaguely, he’s aware of voices around him, but it’s probably the guests. He can’t bother them. He needs to be quiet. His chest is heaving and his heartbeat is in his ears and there’s a metallic taste in his mouth– oh he’s biting his lip again. He lifts a hand to clean his lips but his face is too wet and it’s not helping anything so he clamps his hand over his mouth and forces his breaths inside, where they tumble around and form into words and tear out again, between his fingers, and he can’t stop them. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I won’t do it again. I’ll be quiet this time, I swear. Just don’t– please don’t close the door again I can’t breathe and it’s so dark in here, oh fuck, I’m sorry, I’m sorry–” He covers his ears to shut out the noise but it’s inside of him and it doesn’t quiet down. His lips are still moving but there are no words, or maybe there are but he can’t hear them over the noise in his ears, and then there’s a touch on his arm so he strikes out and–

“Wei Ying!”

The mist in his head clears enough to allow the following touch, on his other arm. He doesn’t fight it. He knows what’s coming. He deserves it. He lowers his head, prepares.

Then nothing. A whisper, very near. “Wei Ying.”

Wei Ying blinks. The dark stays the same but he can breathe a little easier. He’s coming out of it. 

Oh, fuck, what did he do?

“Lan Zhan?” he whispers, voice small and trembling.

“I am here,” comes the reply, strong hands holding him up.

Wei Ying can’t do anything else but fall forward with a sob, his arms reaching around Lan Zhan’s shoulders, pushing his face into Lan Zhan’s chest. “I’m so sorry, Lan Zhan,” he hiccups through sobs. He’s ruining Lan Zhan’s shirt but he only tightens his hold. “I don’t know what came over me, it’s the dark, and then you– and I just–”

“Shh,” Lan Zhan hushes him softly, his strong arms encircling Wei Ying’s back, holding him just as tightly. “I’m the one who should apologize. I pushed you. I am deeply sorry.”

Wei Ying sniffs and shakes his head, his forehead on Lan Zhan’s collar bone. “It’s okay, it’s okay. You’re here.”

“I’m here.”

Lan Zhan is so warm and comfortable. One of Lan Zhan’s hands comes up to Wei Ying’s head and moves it slightly down, until Wei Ying can feel Lan Zhan’s heart beating steadily. It feels like a steadfast horse, slowly walking around on a large grassfield. Like tasting his sister’s lotus rib soup. Like hugging Jiang Cheng, his brother, after a stupid fight where they both went too far, but they’re apologizing and that’s a big step from where they started. 

It feels like home.

“Listen,” Lan Zhan whispers. Wei Ying almost starts crying again because of Lan Zhan’s softness, and his care–why does Lan Zhan cares so much about him? Does he even deserve Lan Zhan’s care?–but he manages to keep the tears back and he focuses on Lan Zhan’s heart.

Wei Ying might be biased, but he thinks Lan Zhan’s is the best heart in the world. Whoever ends up with it, should consider themselves the luckiest person on the planet.

For the next few minutes, he stays there, and listens. He lowers his arms and puts them around Lan Zhan’s middle instead. He’s never hugged Lan Zhan before, you can bet he’s gonna take advantage of it now. Lan Zhan’s hands stay where they are, one on Wei Ying’s back, one in his hair again, twirling the ends.

It feels like home.

When he catches himself falling asleep, his eyelids heavy, he decides he’s relaxed enough and slowly lets go of Lan Zhan, moving back a little, but not entirely out of his space. Lan Zhan’s hands slide down his back, sending shivers down Wei Ying’s spine, and they settle around his waist. They’re the perfect size for Wei Ying’s waist. Maybe it’s just his romantic side talking, but it seems like Lan Zhan’s hands were made to be around his waist. They should stay there forever. 

“Is Wei Ying okay?” Lan Zhan asks softly.

Wei Ying could kiss him. Instead, he nods and wipes his eyes. “I’m okay. Is Lan Zhan okay?”

“Mn.”

His reply makes Wei Ying smile a little. Lan Zhan is so… Lan Zhan. “Think I might’ve gotten some snot on your hair and your shirt, though,” he adds.

“Doesn’t matter.”

Wei Ying lifts his gaze and stares at where Lan Zhan’s face should be, into his eyes. He really, desperately, wants to see those eyes right now. To see if they’re looking at him as intensely as Wei Ying is looking at Lan Zhan. He almost reaches out to touch his face, but manages to hold the urge in. “I think… we should stop 21 questions for now.”

“Mn,” Lan Zhan agrees. “We’ve passed that number by now.”

It draws a quick laugh from Wei Ying. “Silly,” he says, and he wonders how long he’s been in love with Lan Zhan. How long he’s loved Lan Zhan. Jiang Cheng was right after all, he did have a crush. But that was just a crush on the beautiful man in their class, who never really spoke to him directly. Now, after spending hours with him in the dark, basking in Lan Zhan’s warmth, held by his arms, Wei Ying knows he’s in love. And it doesn’t even hurt.

Loving Lan Zhan could never hurt. Lan Zhan deserves that love. And if Lan Zhan doesn’t love him back, that’s alright. Wei Ying would survive.

The idea of Lan Zhan loving him back would’ve seemed incredibly far-fetched a few hours ago, but… He’s just seen Wei Ying at his worst and didn’t run away screaming. Not that Lan Zhan would ever do that, but still. There might be some hope after all. At least he can be sure that Lan Zhan doesn’t hate him anymore.

“Hey, Lan Zhan?”

“Mn?”

“I’d like to talk about what happened some day, but let’s not do it tonight, okay?” He knows Lan Zhan won’t push him intentionally, but he wants to make sure Lan Zhan knows he trusts him. 

“Okay,” Lan Zhan agrees, as if it’s the easiest thing in the world. 

Wei Ying is going to burst with love for this man. He will die and his tombstone will say, killed by love. Jiang Cheng will roll his eyes like he always does. His sister wouldn’t be happy though. Death postponed, then. He’ll have to figure out a way to keep living with this much love in his heart.

-

-

Somehow, they end up on their backs, Lan Zhan laying down next to him. He’s not sure how he managed to convince Lan Zhan to join him–he only asked once–but now their backs are on the hard wooden floor, staring up at the dark ceiling. Wei Ying is lying at an angle, his head touching Lan Zhan’s shoulder, a triangle of space between them. It must be past midnight already, but Wei Ying doesn’t have any trouble staying awake. Surprisingly, Lan Zhan hasn’t fallen asleep either.

“Lan Zhan?”

“Mn?”

“What’s your favorite song? Or favorite band, or whatever.” He wants to use this night to learn as much about Lan Zhan as he can. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever get the opportunity again to talk to him to this extent. Of course, he hopes Lan Zhan would like to hang out again after this, but he’s too scared to ask. 

Lan Zhan hums in thought, but Wei Ying jumps in before he can reply.

“Wait, can I guess? Is it Guqin music?”

“No,” comes the amused reply.

“Irish bagpipe?”

There’s that tiny laugh again. Wei Ying preens. “No,” Lan Zhan repeats.

“Argh, this is so hard, Lan Zhan! I give up.”

“Not instrumental,” Lan Zhan admits. “I like… alternative rock.”

Wei Ying gapes at the ceiling. “You… like what?”

“Paramore,” Lan Zhan says softly.

Wei Ying bursts out laughing. “Paramore! Really? Oh, Lan Zhan, that’s amazing! You keep surprising me.”

Seemingly encouraged by Wei Ying’s praise, Lan Zhan continues. “I also like love songs.”

Wei Ying’s laugh softens. He’s smiling so wide his cheeks hurt. “Ahh,” he sighs. “Of course you do. So sweet. You’re so great, Lan Zhan. And sappy too.”

“Mn, I like sappy.”

He’s going to combust. The butterflies in his stomach flutter wildly.

“Does...” Lan Zhan hesitates uncharacteristically. “Does Wei Ying like sappy, too?”

Now or never. Wei Ying pats the space next to him until he finds Lan Zhan’s hand. He slips his hand into it, intertwining their fingers. “I do,” he whispers.

Lan Zhan squeezes his hand, and doesn’t let go.

The butterflies settle. 

-

-

“Do you miss your brother sometimes?”

“Mn. I do. But I have Radish and Nebula now, and I like living on my own.”

Wei Ying smiles. “That’s nice. I miss my sister a lot, but at least I still share the apartment with Jiang Cheng. I don’t think I could handle living on my own, not yet.”

“Wei Ying could do anything he sets his mind to,” Lan Zhan says, unwavering.

“Sure,” he huffs. ’Achieve the impossible’. It still leaves a bad taste in his mouth. Speaking of bad taste, “And… What about your uncle?”

Lan Zhan is quiet for a moment. Wei Ying doesn’t know much about Lan Qiren, he teaches at their university but Wei Ying doesn’t follow any of his courses. Apparently he’s a big fan of silence during lectures and he doesn’t like people interrupting him or contradicting him. Wei Ying would do horribly. Lan Zhan hasn’t really told him about his uncle, but Wei Ying sort of knows the gist of it, gathered from friends and acquaintances. Apparently, some two years ago, something happened that caused a rift between Lan Qiren and his nephews. Rumor has it Lan Qiren insisted Lan Zhan needed to choose a more ‘useful’ study program, but Lan Zhan disagreed and his brother backed him up. Ever since that incident, Wei Ying respects Lan Huan more. 

“I don’t see him often anymore,” Lan Zhan says. “We have different opinions and views, and I dislike arguing with him. Most of the time, we use Brother as messenger.”

“Really? That’s good,” he muses. “That you were able to get away from it. Sometimes it’s better to cut people out of your life instead of keeping them around for their sake. You gotta be selfish sometimes, you know?”

“Mn,” Lan Zhan agrees. “Does Wei Ying know?”

“Of course,” he lies. Not everyone can afford to be selfish.

-

-

“Can you see anything yet?”

“I cannot.”

Wei Ying groans. “I’m so tired of the dark, Lan Zhan, I just want to see your face! This is torture, for me specifically; hearing you but not being able to see your beautiful face, it’s hell!”

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan scolds him gently.

He rolls his eyes. Lan Zhan gets embarrassed so easily. “Shouldn’t our eyes be adjusted to the dark yet? This is taking so long.”

“There’s no light source,” Lan Zhan explains patiently.

“Which is impossible! I read once that even in a room without windows, you can still see because a bit of light goes through the walls. This library defies physics.”

“We are underground, Wei Ying. There is nothing past these walls except for concrete and soil.”

He pouts. “Who decided to put the library in the basement, anyway? I hate it here.”

Lan Zhan squeezes his hand again.

“I tolerate it here,” he corrects himself quickly.

-

-

“Are you sleeping?”

“I am not.”

“How about now?”

“Still awake.”

“Okay. Me too.”

“Mn.”

-

-

“Lan Zhan.”

“Wei Ying.”

“My head is starting to hurt,” he whines. “The floor is so uncomfortable. At least you have your bag to use as a pillow, I’m just straight on the hard floor.”

“Go lay on a table, then,” Lan Zhan deadpans.

Wei Ying has to bite his lip to contain the laugh that comes bubbling up his throat. “So mean! It wouldn’t be able to hold our weight, silly.”

“Wei Ying could go alone.”

“Are you insane! You’re trying to get rid of me, aren’t you? Don’t you like me anymore, gege?” he teases. “Lan er gege?”

Lan Zhan doesn’t respond. He’s probably too busy rolling his eyes. Wei Ying snickers.

“It’s okay, I’ll survive. We’re lucky it’s not winter anymore.”

“Mn. Is Wei Ying cold?”

“Nah,” he replies. “I’m fine. I’m wearing a big hoodie, the one with the red on the back. Hey, Lan Zhan, what are you wearing?” He bats his eyelashes a few times, a reflex, but obviously that has no effect.

“Shameless,” Lan Zhan replies, and Wei Ying laughs.

-

-

Eventually, the platonic hand-holding and his spiraling thoughts get too much for him. He pushes himself up and slowly wiggles his hand out of Lan Zhan’s hold.

When Lan Zhan doesn’t move or say anything, Wei Ying whispers, “Lan Zhan? Did you fall asleep?”

A sleepy “Hn” answers him.

He winces. “Ah, sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.” He’ll just lay back down and try to occupy his mind with something else. He could also wander around the library but the chances of getting lost with Lan Zhan asleep are embarrassingly high.

Just as he’s calculating the possibility of a bookcase falling over and suffocating him underneath, there’s a rustle from Lan Zhan’s side. He’s sitting up now, too.

Then there’s a touch on Wei Ying’s forearm. “Wei Ying?” Lan Zhan’s voice is still rough from sleep. It’s adorable. “Something wrong?”

“No, I’m fine,” Wei Ying assures him. “It’s just...”

Lying next to you for hours is damaging my brain.

If you keep touching me like that, you’ll make me think things that are impossible.

If you keep touching me, you’ll give me hope.

It’s been dark for hours but all I can think about is how I don’t mind the darkness when you’re next to me.

It’s ironic that I’m stuck in the dark with you, the light of my life.

I’m so in love with you that I’m suffocating when you touch me.

I’m so in love with you that I’m starving when you don’t touch me.

I’m afraid that after this is over, you’ll never look at me again.

Is it wrong that a part of me wants to be stuck here with you, forever?

I don’t want to go to sleep because morning will come, and you’ll leave me.

I don’t deserve you. You are so talented and beautiful and amazing, you don’t need somebody like me.

But I want you so badly.

He pries Lan Zhan’s fingers off his arm. “Nothing, I’m fine.”

“Wei Ying–”

“Lan Zhan. I’m okay. Really. Go back to sleep.” He’s sitting very still. Maybe he can try meditating. To keep those nasty thoughts out.

But Lan Zhan doesn’t lay back down. “I am awake now. Besides, It is nearly five.”

Wei Ying clicks his tongue and shakes his head. “You Lans and your sleeping schedule.” The words come out more affectionately than he wanted.

“Are you tired?” Lan Zhan asks, with ridiculous care. “I am not sleeping anymore, but if you want a pillow, you can lay your head on my leg.”

“No!” Wei Ying shrieks. His head in Lan Zhan’s lap?! No no no no nonono. Bad idea. Not when he’s so sensitive. He’s probably just tired, but if Lan Zhan touched him right now, Wei Ying would clamp his teeth in him like a cat and not let go.

Lan Zhan’s silence sounds offended. He did just yell at him.

“Haha, sorry, Lan Zhan. I’m just bored.” He tries to be as earnest as he can.

Wei Ying can practically hear Lan Zhan frowning. “Do you want to talk more? I could tell you about that time my brother gave me the rabbits–”

“No, that’s okay!” It’s tempting, but he must resist. If Lan Zhan talks about his bunnies right now, Wei Ying will have to kiss him, and that’ll ruin everything. 

He pushes himself up on his feet and starts walking around aimlessly, keeping the layout of the room in mind so he doesn’t run into anything. “My mind is fucking with me a little to be honest, Lan Zhan. I need to walk for a while.”

“Do you want company?”

Yes. “No.” He turns between tables. “Stay there.”

One foot in front of the other, he feels more awake. As the tiredness leaves him, so do the depressing thoughts plaguing him. So what if Lan Zhan doesn’t like him back? As long as Wei Ying doesn’t try anything on him, they’ll still be friends. Good acquaintances, at least. Should he ask for Lan Zhan's number? His phone is dead, though, so maybe now is not the right time.

He’s reached the door. He turns around and zigzags back. “Lan Zhan?”

“Mn?”

“Could you hum that song again? The one you wrote?”

Lan Zhan doesn’t answer, he starts humming immediately. Wei Ying’s shoulders loosen, and he starts to swing his feet a little as he walks. He wonders about the song's name, but he doesn't want to interrupt.

He passes Lan Zhan just as he finishes the song. He sighs with a smile on his face.

“Lan Zhan, that’s so–”

Suddenly, his leg bumps into something on his path and Wei Ying trips with a yell.

He doesn’t land on his face, thankfully. He manages to catch himself on his knees and hands, as the chair clatters next to him. The same fucking chair he kicked when the lights had just gone out. Walking around, he had the arrangement of the tables and chairs in mind, but he forgot about that one.

“Fucking bastard,” he grumbles, turning and sitting down on his butt, knees up and his hands behind his back, supporting him.

“What happened?” Lan Zhan says right into his ear. Wei Ying jumps a little, he hadn’t heard him approach.

He pats Lan Zhan’s chest with the back of his hand. “I’m okay. Just bumped into a chair. Again. I think I’ll file a report for continuous harassment. It’s obsessed with me, Lan Zhan.”

Lan Zhan huffs, either from amusement or annoyance. Wei Ying doesn’t particularly care, any reaction is a good reaction from Lan Zhan. “Are you hurt?” he asks.

“Chafed my knees a little, but I’ll survive.”

“Mn,” Lan Zhan says, predictably.

Wei Ying’s smile turns wicked. He leans in a little. “Aren’t you gonna kiss it better?”

Before Wei Ying can come up with another joke, hands grip his calves and he’s sliding over the floor until his legs bump into Lan Zhan. Wide-eyed, he stares in front of him, arms shaking slightly. That was not what he thought would happen. 

“Uhh...” he says intelligently, Lan Zhan’s big hands warm on his legs. He’s wearing jeans but it still feels like Lan Zhan is touching his skin.

Is Lan Zhan breathing louder or is Wei Ying just very close to him? He’s vaguely aware of his own breathing becoming ragged, but his mind is carefully blank. His blood is rushing downwards. He’s trying not to think about how Lan Zhan is kneeling in front of his legs, how Wei Ying could just–

Not. Thinking. About. It.

Without a sound, Lan Zhan’s hands travel upwards, from his calves to the pits of his knees. Wei Ying bites his lip to hold in a whimper. He has no idea what the hell Lan Zhan is doing, but he’s certainly not going to stop him.

He feels Lan Zhan’s hair fall over his legs and it’s the only warning he gets that Lan Zhan is leaning forward until there’s a pressure on his right knee–

Is Lan Zhan kissing his knee? Wei Ying is going to pass out. The touch leaves and Wei Ying thinks he can hear Lan Zhan lick his lips but that would be ridiculous because why would–

Now it’s his other knee and his face is burning and he wants to pull away because it’s too much but he needs to stay in place because what else is Lan Zhan planning to do?

The only sound he can hear is his own heavy breathing alongside Lan Zhan’s, and then he can feel Lan Zhan’s breath on his face and he has to do something before he does something stupid like reach for Lan Zhan’s face and pull him towards him and kiss him senseless. Lan Zhan isn’t doing this for a purpose, he’s just doing it because Wei Ying so foolishly asked. How many times has his sister held his hand or kissed his knee when he scraped it? This is just the same thing. From Lan Zhan’s side, of course. It’s way different for Wei Ying but Lan Zhan doesn’t need to know.

“Lan Zhan?” he whispers, his voice barely anything more than an exhale. He almost wants to tell him his hands hurt too, and his lips, and every other part of his body, but he’s trembling with want and if he opens his mouth again, everything will spill out.

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan says, and his voice is the deepest it’s ever been. Wei Ying would think it was someone else if he wasn’t still holding his legs and breathing on his face. He can’t think. How does Lan Zhan look right now? Are his pupils as dilated as Wei Ying’s undoubtedly are? Are his lips glistering like Wei Ying’s because he keeps licking them? Are his ears red, like they are when Wei Ying teases him in class?

Lan Zhan says his name again, and fuck– Wei Ying can’t do this.

He scrambles backwards until there’s several feet between them, and then launches himself back up and starts speed-walking between the tables. 

Lan Zhan doesn’t say anything, so Wei Ying breaks the tense silence after a moment. “I’m so bored, we should do something.” He tries to keep his voice even and playful, but he can tell it’s way too high and fast.

Lan Zhan is still silent as Wei Ying struts around. Maybe he needs to compose himself too, a treacherous part of his brain thinks, but he throws that thought away immediately and focuses on rambling to cool himself down.

“We’re not doing any stupid question games again. What about an active game, I need to move. You’re probably okay but I suddenly can’t sit still so you’ll have to indulge me. Maybe we can do Simon Says, you tell me to do something and I do the thing. Wait no, too much talking. Hey, what if we did hide and seek? Wouldn't that be funny?”

He turns a corner and then turns again so he doesn’t walk past Lan Zhan.

“It’ll be very tricky, though, because of the dark and all that. We could do Marco Polo! Do you know that game? You probably do but I’ll explain anyway. So, I’ll go hide, and then you need to find me. And if you say ‘Marco’, I have to answer with ‘Polo!’. That way, you can follow my voice and find me easier. What do you think? I want to go first, though, since I’m already walking around. Okay, you count to thirty, and when you’re done, come find me!”

Wei Ying comes to a halt, near the bookshelves. “Lan Zhan?”

After ten seconds, Wei Ying counts, he finally replies, “Okay.” He’s still sitting where Wei Ying left him.

It's unbelievable that Lan Zhan agrees with his stupid idea, but he can't scramble back now.

“Okay!” Wei Ying calls back, as enthusiastic as he can. “Start counting! And don’t forget to say ‘Marco’!”

“Mn.”

Wei Ying smiles, glad that they’re back to normal, and runs for the bookcases. He wanders around a bit, trying to feel his way to a good spot, but the layout is the same everywhere. No good hiding spots. He pouts, but then tiptoes over to the last hall, the furthest away from the tables and Lan Zhan.

He puts his back against a shelf and closes his eyes, focusing on Lan Zhan.

He doesn’t have to wait very long. He hears Lan Zhan get up and wander around. He walks into a table a few times and each time Wei Ying almost laughs. Eventually, Lan Zhan reaches the start of the bookcases, and then says, “Marco.”

“Polo!” he shouts back gleefully. This is great. No tension to be seen, just two friends playing hide and seek.

Lan Zhan’s footsteps approach hesitantly, carefully. Wei Ying can already see it before him, the way Lan Zhan has his arms stretched out to feel the bookcases, making sure he doesn’t push one over with his incredible strength.

The footsteps get closer and closer, and Wei Ying’s heart starts to race again, the rebellious thing. He presses himself further into the bookcase behind him, as if it will shield him from Lan Zhan’s nearing body. Maybe this was a bad idea after all.

Then all is quiet. Wei Ying waits.

“Marco.” Lan Zhan is much closer than Wei Ying had expected.

“Polo,” he whispers, and then his wrist is snatched and Wei Ying lets out a surprised noise. Before anything else can happen, like Lan Zhan coming too close and Wei Ying losing control again, he pulls away. “You caught me! Good job! Now it’s your turn.”

He finds Lan Zhan’s shoulders and turns him away from him, then pushes him. “Go, go! I’m going to start counting!”

Lan Zhan grumbles something in response but Wei Ying is covering his ears and focusing really hard on counting. One, two, three ...

“Thirty!” he shouts, uncovering his ears and opening his eyes again. Closing his eyes didn’t really do anything, but it’s the thought that counts. “I’m coming!”

He does not stumble over that last word.

Wei Ying tries to listen to the silence, to get an idea of where Lan Zhan might be, but he soon finds out that’s still not a good idea to be alone with his thoughts, so before he even sets his first step, he shouts, “Marco!”

It’s quiet for a few long seconds, long enough for Wei Ying to start to doubt whether Lan Zhan is actually real or if he just hallucinated him, until he hears a quiet “Polo” from the front.

“Lan Zhan, that was way too slow!” he scolds, and starts shuffling that way. “You’ll make me think you left me all alone! Haven’t you played this before? Are you being quiet because of the game or because you’re brooding again? You know, I liked you more when you were talking so enthusiastically about your bunnies! Or Paramore!”

He doesn’t get a reaction. He pouts, but he’s almost at the front part of the library, where he heard Lan Zhan. “I’m close, Lan Zhan! I don’t even need to shout ‘Marco’ anymore, because I know where you are! I’m really good at this game, you know. When–”

His toes catch on the end of a bookcase and he’s stumbling, trying to find his footing but failing and then he’s falling and–

Strong arms catch him halfway to the ground. He’s like one of those swooning ladies in a tango dip. They would be really good at tango actually, Wei Ying can already see it before him. Him in a dashing red shirt, Lan Zhan in black, leading him around and dipping him dramatically.

His leg slips a little and he almost falls again but Lan Zhan’s arms tighten around his waist and he’s safe again. Wei Ying should really do something about this situation instead of hanging there like a dead weight but he’s comfortable.

Lan Zhan isn’t moving either so they’re both stuck in this limbo. He’s expecting Lan Zhan to either drop him or pull him up, but Lan Zhan holds steady. It’s pretty impressive, the way he’s carrying Wei Ying’s entire weight without any signs of struggle. Bless those Lan arms. Nie Huaisang told him the Lans learn to do handstands as soon as they physically can, something he can now confirm. He wonders what else those arms can do. Would Lan Zhan be able to hold his entire weight if he wraps his legs around Lan Zhan’s middle? Would Lan Zhan be able to throw him–

For fuck’s sake. Lan Zhan is probably extremely uncomfortable right now, and what does Wei Ying do? Ramble away in his thoughts about Lan Zhan’s arms. Really classy, Wei Ying.

After what feels like hours suspended in mid-air in silence, Wei Ying speaks. “Found you.”

Afraid that Lan Zhan will drop him if he teases him, he says, “Thanks for catching me. Uhm. You can put me down now.”

Without so much as a ‘Mn’, Lan Zhan suddenly starts to pull him up, but his feet are still not secure on the ground so he finds himself falling yet again. Lan Zhan isn’t quick enough to catch him this time but Wei Ying accidentally gets a hold of Lan Zhan’s sleeve and pulls him with him, which he really should have seen coming with his luck.

He lands on his back with an “Oof”, and then gets crushed under Lan Zhan’s weight as the man falls on top of him, their bodies aligning but their heads thankfully not hitting each other.

He’s too shocked to move for a while. His heart is thumping out of his chest, and he can feel it resonated through Lan Zhan’s chest. His entire body is burning. 

He needs to get out of this situation, before his hands start to wander. 

“Sorry,” he whispers, trying to catch his breath. “I’m not complaining, but you’re suffocating me a little.”

“Oh,” Lan Zhan says, and it’s the first thing he’s heard from him after the ‘Polo’, which feels like ages ago. “I… I did not mean to.”

Lan Zhan moves off him, and Wei Ying does not sulk. He follows and sits on his knees, fidgeting with his sleeves. The tension from before is back and he has no idea what to do about it. Well, he certainly has some ideas, but none of them are helpful.

“I bet my hair is a mess right now,” he says eventually. “I need to get it cut soon because it’s getting too long, but I’m lazy, you know?”

Thankfully, Lan Zhan allows the topic change and follows. “Hm. Wei Ying has nice hair.”

He snorts, still painfully aware of Lan Zhan sitting close by. “Your hair is so much better, it’s beautiful. I wish I could make my hair do that.”

He gets no warning before Lan Zhan touches his face, hand carefully wandering over to his ear. He tries to keep his breathing even as Lan Zhan gently pushes a strand of hair behind his ear, and then strokes a hand over his hair until it stops at his nape.

Wei Ying’s fingers are digging into his legs, to keep himself from making a sound. It’s becoming increasingly more difficult as the silence stretches. And then Lan Zhan opens his mouth.

“Your hair is perfect.”

The dam breaks. Wei Ying surges forward and after awkwardly landing on Lan Zhan’s cheek, he catches those damned lips with his own. He means for it to be a quick peck, but then Lan Zhan’s free hand grabs his right and holds him tight. Lan Zhan leans into the kiss, accepting Wei Ying, and Wei Ying wants more.

His left hand finds Lan Zhan’s jaw, angles him just right, and then opens his mouth to deepen the kiss. To his surprise, Lan Zhan follows easily, allowing Wei Ying’s tongue in and even pushing back with his own tongue.

He thinks he might explode. The air in his lungs runs out and he needs to break away to breathe. For a second, they’re both panting, hands clasped tight, and then they’re both going in for another kiss, and another, and another.

“I like you so much, Lan Zhan,” he confesses between kisses, loose-lipped and soft.

Lan Zhan hums into his mouth, moves both of his hands to Wei Ying’s face and pushes him back a little.

Wei Ying whines and tries to steal another kiss, but Lan Zhan keeps him there. He pouts. Only then, he realizes what he said, and he sobers up. Damn. He was doing so well, and then his feelings had to get in the way. Now he made it awkward.

“Uhm, I–”

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan says, determined, as if he’s trying to make a point. It confuses Wei Ying a little. Does he want to stop? Did Wei Ying read this completely wrong? Oh fuck, what if he–

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan repeats. Now it kind of seems like Lan Zhan is psyching himself up for something. That’d be ridiculous, though.

“Yes,” he whispers back, ready to pull his walls up again once the rejection comes.

“Listen.”

“I am listening!”

“Wei Ying.”

“What!” he almost shouts, exasperated. “Why are you just repeating my name? Spit it out already!”

Lan Zhan is still cupping his face and won’t let go. “Let me talk.”

“I’m listening!”

“I love your name,” Lan Zhan says, and Wei Ying’s mouth falls closed in surprise. His heart stutters.

“What?”

“Be quiet.”

“Okay,” he squeaks.

“I love your name,” Lan Zhan repeats. “I love your smile. I love how you rub your nose when you’re thinking.”

“Lan Zhan,” he whispers, but it’s almost inaudible, his heart is doing somersaults and Lan Zhan keeps going.

“I love your bravery and your courage, and the way you fight for what is right. I love you, Wei Ying.”

Oh.

Oh.

He can’t see anything but he can imagine the way Lan Zhan’s eyes are burning into his soul. Lan Zhan sees him. Lan Zhan loves him?

“You love me?” he asks, stutters, his throat clogging up.

“Mn.”

Wei Ying sniffs and tries to blink away the tears forming in his eyes, to no avail. He feels tears running down his face, but then Lan Zhan’s fingers wipe his cheeks gently. It only makes him cry more.

Choking down another sob, because he needs to say it, he can’t go any more seconds without saying it or he will explode, he manages, “I love you too. I love you so much, Lan Zhan.”

Lan Zhan’s fingers still and there’s the sound of Lan Zhan inhaling sharply. Wei Ying connects the dots.

“You didn’t know?”

“I...” Lan Zhan’s breath hitches. “I always hoped, but I didn’t think… We are so different, Wei Ying. I didn’t think you would like someone like me.”

“What?” he says incredulously. “Someone like you? You mean, beautiful beyond compare, intelligent, funny, gentle, kind, steadfast, strong, amazing, and so on?! Lan Zhan!”

Lan Zhan huffs.

“You are so amazing! I’d be a fool not to see that. I think half the school is in love with you!” He adds the last part with a grumble.

“The other half is surely in love with you, then.”

“Ahhhh.” He laughs and tries to cover his face but ends up just covering Lan Zhan’s hands. “So smooth.”

“Is Wei Ying smiling?” Lan Zhan asks.

“I am.”

“I could tell,” Lan Zhan says. “Wei Ying’s smile always lights up the room.”

He can feel his eyes bulge out of his sockets as he sputters. “What the– what– I’m...”

Lan Zhan is laughing quietly but Wei Ying is still trying to recover.

“Did you just– was that a pickup line? Were you flirting?”

“It was a compliment,” Lan Zhan says, his voice slightly higher, very close to teasing. Is Lan Zhan actually flirting with him? His head is spinning. “And the truth.”

“Stop stop stop!” he pleads, shaking Lan Zhan’s wrists. “Let’s go back to kissing. I love you, you love me, for whatever reason, so we’re on the same page. Ha ha, page. Get it, Lan Zhan? Because we’re in a– mmpf.”

He gets cut off by Lan Zhan’s mouth on his, but he doesn’t mind. He smiles into the kiss and lets his hands wander upwards to grab onto the back of Lan Zhan’s neck.

Lan Zhan loves him! He likes him. They could be friends. Hopefully more than friends. He'll have to ask later, his mouth is rather occupied at the moment.

Lan Zhan’s hands move to his waist where he grabs on tight, and Wei Ying moans into his mouth, pulling himself closer.

Their legs are flushed together but he still wants to get closer so he pulls Lan Zhan down a little and tries to shuffle forward, but then Lan Zhan catches on and lifts him up–lifts him up!–and puts Wei Ying on his lap. 

Coherent thought has left his brain. Now there's only Lan Zhan Lan Zhan Lan Zhan.

“Oh wow, fuck, Lan Zhan,” he pants, getting comfortable on his lap.

Lan Zhan’s hands settle right above Wei Ying’s ass, more daring than Wei Ying thought him capable of. He smirks and grinds down, catching Lan Zhan’s shuddering exhale with his mouth. His hands find Lan Zhan’s hair and he pulls as he grinds down again, and Lan Zhan releases an quiet groan that makes Wei Ying even crazier.

Lan Zhan grips him tighter and then bites his lip, and Wei Ying stops thinking for a while.

-

-

Much later, Wei Ying finally found something comfortable to lay on: Lan Zhan. His head is pillowed on Lan Zhan’s chest. It’s a very nice chest. It feels like a nice chest, at least. He hasn’t been able to see it yet, but he’s optimistic. Their legs are entangled. 

He has no idea how Lan Zhan is able to hold his weight so easily, he’s not that much taller. It must be that Lan strength. That same strength with which Lan Zhan lifted him up like a feather and carried him around the library to push Wei Ying against walls or tables. Very consensual, might he add. He’s never going to be able to walk around the library anymore without remembering how they spent the last hour. No regrets.

Wei Ying hadn’t actually imaged kissing Lan Zhan before, not vividly, because Lan Zhan seemed so out of range. But he never would’ve expected Lan Zhan to kiss like that. Passionate and deep and rough at times, but also sweet and soft. 

They didn’t go much further than kissing and feeling, university property and all that, but he hopes there’ll be a repeat. Multiple ones. Infinite ones. 

“I’m glad I got stuck here with you,” he mumbles, his fingers tracing Lan Zhan’s side. He’s not ticklish, sadly. He’ll have to keep searching for a weakness. There has to be one. Lan Zhan can’t be perfect, can he? Not if he likes Wei Ying.

“Hm,” Lan Zhan says. “I’d rather be at home.”

“Lan Zhan!” he gasps dramatically. He tilts his head towards Lan Zhan’s face, and then flicks his chin. “How could you say that? My fragile heart is in pieces.”

“At home with you,” Lan Zhan corrects himself, as he should. “My bed is slightly more comfortable than the floor.”

Wei Ying gasps again. “Scandalous! Shameless! How forward of you, Mr. Lan.” He plants a kiss on Lan Zhan’s chin. “You’ll make me think you only want me for my gorgeous body.” He leaves more kisses as he trails down to his neck and collarbones, and then goes up again to his ear. There, he bites his earlobe slightly. 

Lan Zhan doesn’t make a noise. Damn.

“Ridiculous,” he breathes on Lan Zhan’s skin.

“Ridiculous,” Lan Zhan answers. He lifts Wei Ying’s head a little and presses his soft lips against his forehead. Wei Ying’s eyes fall shut as he revels in the feeling.

Warmth blooms in his chest. It feels like home. 

One of Lan Zhan’s hands inevitably ends up in his hair again, as the other holds him tight around the waist. Wei Ying holds onto his sides loosely, his grip slacking as his body grows more drowsy.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to stay awake much longer,” he whispers, his voice barely there. He can feel his consciousness slip through his fingers. 

“Mn. Sleep,” Lan Zhan says. He sounds tired too. At least that’s one thing he’s not invincible at. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“You should sleep too,” he slurs. 

“Wei Ying first.”

He would roll his eyes if he could open them. “You’re so annoying,” he mumbles. “In the sexiest way possible, of course. I love you.”

“Sleep, Wei Ying.”

He grumbles, “Say it back.”

Far away, he registers Lan Zhan leaving a kiss on his hair, along with the words, “I love you.”

With a happy hum, Wei Ying gets dragged down by sleep.

He’s safe.

-

-

Morning arrives with a click of the door opening and a gasp.

Wei Ying grumbles and pushes his face deeper into his pillow. It’s way too early. 

“What the hell?” a voice says, and that’s definitely not Jiang Cheng. 

Wei Ying pushes himself up, and oh. That’s not his pillow. Or his bed. 

Lan Zhan stares at him. 

Lan Zhan. 

Memories from last night drift back, and the morning panic gets replaced by a happy and satisfied warmth. Lan Zhan.

Someone turned the lights on again, so Wei Ying sees Lan Zhan for the first time since… their last class together, Monday. He’s struck by how beautiful he is.

Of course Lan Zhan is beautiful, he knew that already, but the past night increased his beauty by a hundred. 

He stares at Lan Zhan’s lips. They’re still a bit red and swollen. 

I did that, he thinks, a little hysterically. He could’ve been convinced that the past twelve hours were just a dream, but seeing Lan Zhan before him actually solidifies it. 

His gaze travels up, and he meets Lan Zhan’s eyes again. They exude warmth and fondness and Wei Ying is starstruck. Lan Zhan has never looked at him like that. He could get used to it. 

He smiles, happiness spilling over. Lan Zhan’s gaze lowers to his mouth, and then Lan Zhan’s mouth corners curl up. He’s smiling back. 

Wei Ying can barely breathe. 

Someone clears their throat.

He turns his head and sees someone standing in the doorway. Oh, right. There had been someone there, waking him up.

He sits up but refuses to get off Lan Zhan, so he sits on Lan Zhan’s stomach–abs–with his knees bracketing his body. Lan Zhan doesn’t protest.

Wei Ying finally focuses on the third person in the room, and unsurprisingly, it’s the library’s supervisor. She has a key hanging from her hand, her eyebrows are scrunched, and she looks very confused.

When she sees that she has their attention, she hesitantly walks closer. “Lan Zhan?”

“Luo Qingyang,” Lan Zhan answers with a nod, as solemn as he can while laying flat on the floor. 

“What the hell are you doing here?” she asks. “Wei Ying?”

“Hi!” he replies, waving at her. 

Luo Qingyang looks between the two of them like she’s trying to solve a complex math problem. Wei Ying doesn’t feel the need to explain, it’s funnier to watch her work it out on her own. 

Eventually, Lan Zhan says, “Wei Ying.”

“Hm?” he replies, easily shifting his attention back to him. He wants to give in to the temptation and lean in for a kiss, this time not obscured by the dark, but Lan Zhan seems embarrassed enough. His ears are turning red. It’s adorable.

“We should get up,” Lan Zhan says, his touch pressing slightly on Wei Ying’s legs.

He pouts. “But I’m so comfy, Lan Zhan!”

Lan Zhan just stares.

He can’t resist it. “Fine,” he gives in. He pushes himself up, off Lan Zhan and onto his feet. He shakes out his legs and stretches his arms, only to attract Lan Zhan’s heavy stare, and it works! If Luo Qingyang weren’t there, Wei Ying would get devoured. Speaking of, “Hi, Qingyang! I finally know your name now, ha!”

He doesn’t get a reaction. He understands why she and Lan Zhan are friends now.

He wants to offer his hand to Lan Zhan to help him up, but then he gets distracted by a green spot on the floor and walks over. He bends down and lifts it up, turns it around and gasps in distress. “No! This can’t be!” It’s the beanie. It’s green. “It’s not my color, Lan Zhan! I can never wear it! Oh, woe is me!”

While he’s breaking down over a piece of fabric that he had tossed aside after ten minutes the night before, Luo Qingyang ignores him and approaches Lan Zhan. “What are you doing here?”

“There was a power outage,” Lan Zhan explains calmly, looking dignified again as he stands upright. “The door was locked.”

“You got stuck here all night? With Wei Ying?”

“Hey!” he shouts back. He tosses the beanie far away and goes to grab his bag.

“Mn.”

“Well…” Luo Qingyang trails off. “Seems like you had a good time. I won’t tell anyone if you won’t.”

Wei Ying laughs. “I’ll only tell my friends to gloat, not like, the police to press charges, don’t worry!” He gathers his notes from the evening before and stuffs them haphazardly in his bag. 

He makes his way back over to Lan Zhan again, avoiding that damn chair that already almost killed him twice. 

“Good,” Luo Qingyang says. She looks around the room, at the tables and chairs that are all slightly off-center. “Did you sleep here?”

“We did much more than sleep!” he winks at her and nudges Lan Zhan. “Right, Lan Zhan?”

Lan Zhan doesn’t nod or agree, but his mouth corners turn up slightly and Wei Ying definitely considers that a win.

Luo Qingyang rolls her eyes. “I’m already tired of this conversation, please get out.”

Wei Ying chuckles but decides to stop bothering her. He’s starting to get hungry. “Thanks for saving us!”

“Don’t forget your stuff. And get some sleep, you look horrible.”

“Aw, you do care!” He sticks out his tongue at her. Lan Zhan comes back to his side, bag around his shoulder. He wraps his arm around Lan Zhan’s and starts to pull him to the exit. “Bye!” he shouts back.

“Bye, weirdo,” she says. Then she nods to Lan Zhan, with a bit of a smirk on her face. “Talk to you later, Lan Zhan.”

Lan Zhan nods back, and then they’re in the stairwell. Side by side, they go up, cross a hallway or two, and then they’re outside.

It’s bright. The sun shines. It’s still way too early to be up on a Saturday, but it’s nice. 

They halt on the top of the stairs and Wei Ying turns to Lan Zhan. He’s ethereal in the sunlight. 

Wei Ying loosens his grip on Lan Zhan’s arm and instead takes his hand, intertwines their fingers. He hesitates a second, but the warmth in Lan Zhan’s eyes gives him courage, so he closes the distance and kisses Lan Zhan’s cheek sweetly. 

He pulls back, and Lan Zhan’s face doesn’t tell him anything but his red ears betray him. Wei Ying smiles smugly. “So...”

Then Lan Zhan lifts their joined hands and plants a tender kiss on the back of his hand. Wei Ying doesn’t squeal.

Lan Zhan asks, “Would you like to get breakfast?”

“Yes!” he agrees enthusiastically. Food and more time with Lan Zhan? No better way to spend a Saturday. “I’m starving.” They go down the stairs and at the bottom, he starts tugging him towards a diner where they have spicy pancakes. “Oh shit, is this gonna be our first date? I look terrible, probably!”

“Wei Ying looks beautiful,” Lan Zhan humors him. There’s no way Wei Ying looks good after a night of making out and laying on the floor. 

Still, he blushes at Lan Zhan’s directness. “Alright, alright, calm it down with the praise, I just woke up! Anyway, a date?”

“Mn. A date.” Lan Zhan smiles again.

He punches the air with his free fist and beams. “Fuck yeah. After breakfast, we can try out your bed.” He winks sideways. “See if it’s better than the library floor.”

Lan Zhan nods and says very seriously, “Wei Ying needs more sleep.”

He rolls his eyes fondly. “That’s not what I meant! Get that shit-eating smile off your face, you’re terrible, I love you so much. Let’s get pancakes.”