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Training had started to not be as fun as it used to be. At first it had been all about messing around and testing the abilities Virgil was good with. That had been cool! Logan would have him do different things with his shadows and they’d basically just try a whole bunch of experiments.
Then, Logan had gotten The Book. It was an introductory book about light manipulation powers that basically explained different techniques light manipulators could do laid out in order of difficulty.
The introductory section was basic things kids usually did automatically like glowing and manipulating the direction of already existent light sources. Virgil could do those things already and they were mostly used as warmups every session. Then, the first 10 chapters were supposed to be the standard basics that most light manipulators learned early on. After that, there were 5 optional chapters each with different directions one could take their powers. Those were things like learning to separate white light into different colors, beginning to expand into other powers like fire-starting and sound wave manipulation, and different ways to influence common technology. It was an awesome book.
Virgil absolutely despised it.
They were currently on Chapter 1: Making Light Beams, Section 1: Location Control of Bodily Glow. Currently, Virgil’s entire torso and one foot was glowing. His fingertips were supposed to be glowing. He’d been working on this for almost 2 weeks and hadn’t gotten any better.
There was a small frown on Logan’s face as he scrutinized Virgil’s latest fuck up. He glanced back down at the stupid book. “I think you are perhaps focusing too hard making more of your body light up then necessary. The book suggests thinking of ‘the light as running water flowing through your hands.’ Whatever that means.”
Yes, Virgil knew what the book said. He practically had the section memorized at this point since Logan wouldn’t stop reading it out loud to him. He was probably hoping repetition would get it through Virgil’s unbearably thick skull; Virgil wondered how long it would take him to figure out he was too stupid for this.
Probably not long considering the crease between his eyes as he looked at him. “Perhaps we should take a short break,” he suggested.
Virgil nodded miserably.
“I’m going grab some supplies from my office upstairs,” Logan continued. “Please consume an adequate electrolyte replenishing drink while I’m gone.”
“I will,” Virgil promised. He nodded, still seeming lost in thought about how much of a fuck up Virgil was as he walked toward the stairs.
Virgil sighed and walked over to the mini fridge to grab one of the small purple Gatorades and took a few sips. He glared at the book, but then his shoulders slumped. It wasn’t the books fault. He set the half drank Gatorade down next to the fridge and walked over to the table where the book was propped open. The section was only a page and a half full of the most basic steps possible and a fucking picture. He couldn’t even do it with fucking pictorial instructions.
He bent over the book to slowly read the passage again. Maybe if he just kept reading it, it would stick. After a few minutes of staring at the open page, he heard footsteps descending the steps. They were only about halfway down the stairs when the book that he’d been leaning over suddenly rocketed up and slammed into his face, shoving him back as it went flying through the air. He fell back onto his butt, stunned for a millisecond as his face smarted from the impact.
Oh. He guessed he really had managed to piss him off.
It wasn’t the first time Virgil had been smacked in the face with a book for being stupid. He had hoped that since Logan had kept saying it was okay that he was taking a while to figure it out that maybe this wouldn’t happen, but he guessed everyone had their limit.
“Apologies Virgil,” Logan said from the foot of the stairs. “I did not want to hit you.”
Of course, he didn’t. Virgil was just that stupid and pathetic that he’d made Logan hit him.
“Yeah,” Virgil replied.
“Are you alright?” Logan asked.
“Fine,” Virgil said, steeling himself before shakily pushing himself to his feet.
“Do we need to stop for the afternoon?” Logan asked not unkindly, but Virgil could guess at the concealed resentment behind his tone.
“No, it’s fine,” Virgil lied. It was easy, actually, to just say what an adult wanted, like slipping into an old worn t-shirt.
“Very well,” Logan said. “I brought some diagrams that I’d printed off.” He was looking down at the book in his arms now. “There seems to be a few other schools of thought about what exactly the move feels like.” A paper floated towards Virgil and he managed to not flinch. It hovered in front of him. “This diagram seems to compare it more to heat as though imagining there is a fire between your palms.”
Virgil looked at the paper. It was a picture of a featureless body and there were arrows and words, but Virgil had trouble understanding what they were trying to say. He stared at it blankly for a few moments. “Okay,” he said. The paper fluttered away.
“Very good,” Logan said. “Go ahead and try again.”
Virgil nodded as he walked past him to sit on his usual bench; his eyes tracked him all the way there.
Virgil looked down at his hands. He took a breath and tried to make his fingertips glow or even just his hands; that would be progress.
He didn’t even glow at all, not even in the wrong places.
He felt himself want to tear up, but he repressed it harshly. He just had to make his fingertips glow. It wasn’t even hard. It was for babies. He was such a fucking failure if he couldn’t even do that. Virgil was surprised that he hadn’t gotten more than smacked in the face with a book.
“Virgil?” Logan questioned.
Just do what he wanted. It would all be okay if he just did what he wanted.
Why couldn’t he just do what he wanted?
“Virgil,” Logan repeated, louder and closer and Virgil flinched.
There was a beat of silence.
“Okay,” he said softly. “I think we’re done for the day.”
“No!” Virgil said, eyes jerking up to meet his. He was really, really close. “No, I can do it. I can.”
“Virgil,” he said one more time, firmly. His hand came up to rest on Virgil’s shoulder.
“No!” Virgil yelled, crumpling down and away onto the floor.
Virgil was surprised to see his feet move away a bit so he was out of Virgil’s space. His arm moved and Virgil curled even more into himself, but nothing happened.
Well, something must have happened, he realized a couple of seconds later, just not to him because he heard footsteps all but running down the stairs from the kitchen. Patton appeared at the bottom of the steps out of breath. “What happened?” he asked.
Logan just made some sort of awkward gesture toward Virgil.
Patton came to his knees in front of him, hands placed flat on his own thighs. “Hey, kiddo. Can you tell me what’s going on?”
“Sorry,” Virgil breathed. “I’m sorry. I’ll do better.”
“Honey, can you tell me what you’re talking about?”
“I made Logan mad because I’m so stupid,” Virgil said, trying not to cry.
“I’m not mad at you,” Logan said, sounding confused. Virgil curled up tighter into a ball. Patton made a hand motion and Logan slowly came over to kneel in front of him.
“Why would you think…” he said and then he paused, seeming to mull it over. “Virgil, I think we may have had a very large communication error. You seem to be under the misconception that I intended for the book to hit you, but that is in no way the case. I simply had wanted to check on something in the book and was unaware you were in its path when I summoned it. I would never purposefully harm you. Not for any reason and especially not because of something as minor as struggling with learning a concept. I am very sorry for hitting you and for not noticing there was a misunderstanding earlier.”
Virgil looked at him. He was on Virgil’s level, Virgil noticed and maybe it was a weird thing to notice right now, but it felt nicer than looking up at him. He looked serious, his eyes sad and worried.
“Really?” Virgil asked tentatively.
“Yes, of course.”
Virgil thought and both Logan and Patton gave him time to think. Logan had never hit him before. He hadn’t even done anything close or even threatened to do anything, and it was an accident that could happen. Virgil thought… well maybe he could believe that. He hoped it wasn’t just because he wanted to believe it.
“Okay,” Virgil said at last. “Okay.”
“Want a hug?” Patton asked.
Virgil bit his lip and nodded.
“From Logan?”
“If that’s okay,” Virgil mumbled.
“It is,” Logan confirmed. He scooted forward slowly on his knees and opened his arms in offering. Virgil leaned into him and arms were wrapped around him snuggly.
Virgil rested his check against his chest. The familiar scent of their laundry detergent hit his nose as well as the faint sent of chalk that always lingered on him even when Virgil hadn’t seen him use a chalkboard that day. Virgil relaxed into hug with a slow exhale.
Patton’s gentle fingers touched his forehead and he started to stroke though his hair. “Oh, baby, it’s okay,” Patton said softly which is when Virgil realized he’d started to cry. “You didn’t deserve any of that.” Virgil just held Logan tighter and got a gentle squeeze in return. Patton moved forward to press a kiss to his forehead. “We should go upstairs,” Patton said. “Dinner is probably burning.”
“We can order in,” Logan said.
Patton nodded. “Virgil can pick where.”
“I don’t know any places that deliver.”
“Don’t worry,” Patton said. “Logan has a list of all approved places as well as updated menus for each. Even though we order out once every 3 months.”
“It’s good to be prepared.”
“I know, dear.” Patton leaned forward to kiss Virgil’s forehead again. “Logan might even let us eat on the couch if you give him puppy dog eyes. We can watch another Disney movie while we eat.”
Virgil chuckled softly. “Sounds good.”
“You have to give him the puppy dog eyes though!” Patton insisted.
Virgil pulled away from Logan and Logan let his arms drop away. Virgil bit his lip looking at Patton and then looked back at Logan unsure what he was supposed to do.
“Yes, yes,” Logan said. “You’re adorable and you get anything you want.”
Virgil giggled and Logan gave him a fond smile.
“We really do have to go upstairs though,” Patton said. “I left the stove on.”