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It was unfair. Completely unfair.
How exactly was she supposed to focus on fighting when those three strutted around in those outfits? And here she thought that the "Prince" get up was bad - seriously, a white prince costume with a short skirt? It's been years and she still wasn't used to the white and red pleated skirt that reached midway through her tights, looking ridiculous with the knee-high white boots and stockings that left just enough skin exposed to make her self consciously tug it down when a shadow used garu skills, but the others were just...
Akechi tried not to think about how she would describe them as she leaned against the wall, waiting with Joker, Skull and Fox, for the others to re-group -a surprise attack had let them to split up. She looked over at Joker and Skull, who were chatting cheerfully on the other side of the small room, for once thankful her mask that hid half of her face was bright red because it made the redness that was slowly creeping up her cheeks less obvious.
Joker had let her dark coat slide down one of her shoulder, which normally wouldn't be a problem, it's just a shoulder for fuck's sake, but combined with the tight -way, way too tight, in her opinion- grey sleeveless turtleneck that hugged her chest, the way the thigh high heeled boots showed off her long legs as she crossed and uncrossed them while listening intently to Skull, making a soft hum occasionally, twirling her dagger in her gloved hands... Was just too much. Even the way her hair, even messier now that it wasn't braided -seriously, had that girl ever heard of what a hairbrush is?- fell down loose around her shoulders and back, so long that it almost reached her lower back was -
Skull laughed loudly, thankfully snapping her out of the thoughts of what exactly she wanted to do with Joker's hair, sitting crossed-legged, leaning back, her arms open and casually splayed on the back of the couch, pulling back the open leather jacket and showing off the short black top underneath and her abs.
Oh no.
Akechi was just glad Skull's outfit came with a red scarf because even if she wasn't particularly her type, she wasn't sure she was going to be able to take it if the outfit showed off her chest too. It was already bad enough that the outfit had one of those stereotypical fucking pirate skirts you'd see in a bad movie or costume, longer on one side and short and hunched up so high up on the other that exposed almost her whole thigh. The combat boots with little skulls on the laces, the knee-high black socks, the little metal knee guards and the belts full of bullet rounds hanging loosely somehow made her legs look even better which she didn't think would be possible after seeing her in the short skirt of the Shujin uniform, her toned leg muscles pronounced enough to show even under the sports tights she usually wore under it.
"Are you alright Crow?" A deep feminine voice almost made her jump. Fox gave her a questioning look, long lashes visible even behind the mask, looking up from her sketchbook. "You seem under the weather." Akechi smiled.
"Ah, please don't mind me!" she replied quickly. "I was lost in thought." Fox nodded and went back to her drawing, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Akechi shallowed. She always found her pretty, from when she first saw her around the time of the whole Madarame incident. She had long straight hair back then, giving off a regal, almost princess-like aura, but when she cut it off after his confession to the short, boyish cut, showing off her long neck-
The metaverse definitely didn't help, her collar high enough to hide it most of the time, but the zipper going down almost too low, instead just drawing the attention to her chest and pronounced collarbones. It must be some kind of cognitive magic because with just how low cut the outfit was, it was impossible how she didn't flash them at some point, especially while crawling around -
Nope. Bad idea.
Remembering crawling through the vents, Fox's long legs directly in front of her, that stupid little fluffy tail swaying with every move -
"Duuude, your face is completely red." Skull had gotten up, moving closer to her, her lips in a small pout. Did she always have so cute and glossy lips? She wasn't the type to wear gloss so maybe lip balm? "You have a fever or somethin'?" Joker looked over as well, gazing intently behind her mask.
"It's important to not neglect your health." Fox let down her sketchbook and also approached, Joker giving her a 'like you're the one to talk' look while Skull sighed and shook her head agreeing with their leader. "Perhaps you should sit down-" Akechi let out a small laugh.
"Oh, no, I assure you, there's no need to worry, I'm just-" gay. So fucking gay. "-distracted." Before she realized, Joker had also come up next to her and slid her hand under her bangs, pressing her hand on her forehead just above the mask.
Shit. Well, if it wasn't before her face was definitely red now.
Joker looked at her with a puzzled look for a second, before she smirked. "Can't really do this with gloves on." she hummed and Skull laughed, putting her elbow on Fox's shoulder as she chuckled in amusement.
"Really, I am fin-EHH!" Her sentence ended in a surprised yelp as Joker pulled up her bangs and softly pressed her lips against her forehead.
"Oh, your face definitely feels hot. Stick with Oracle in the back for now, alright?" She said, leading her towards the couch, where she was sat between Fox and Skull, feeling her face somehow even hotter than before, Joker sitting opposite of her on the table. That...Was the exact opposite of helping the situation.
"Un-Understood! Sorry for making you worry. I'll make sure to get some rest when I get back home!"
If she didn't die from a heart attack before that.