Chapter Text
Part I- Fire
Fire is the element of power (Iroh)
„I love Zuko more than I fear you.“, Mai said, looking Azula directly in the eye.
Just for a moment, she was struck. Unable to respond, or even to process the words. She heard them, but they did not make sense.
Then, suddenly everything fell into place. “No, you miscalculated. You should have feared me more.“
To her own surprise, sounded affected. She was affected. That’s weak, Azula.”, a well know voice in her head scolded, and the emotions she had just felt were wiped out, replaced with cold, rational thought. When Mai pulled out a knife, Azula raised her hand the same time, ready to strike. Her so called friends would not stand a chance. Not even the avatar had been able to take on her lightning.
Still, something in the back of her head bothered her. Something that did not quite add up. Mai wasn’t stupid. She had to know what her chances on this were . And the look Azula found in her eyes confirmed that Mai knee that she knew.
Suddenly, a part of her did not want to throw any lightning at all. A part of her wanted to lower her hand and just let the knife find it’s way. Or tell Mai that they would not have to do this. That’s weak, Azula.
She heard her fathers voice again, this time with even more disgust. And do I have a weak daughter?
Suddenly, she did not see Mai anymore. Just him, looking down in disappointment And there was nothing would not do to escape that look.
She took a deep breath, ready to strike for real now. But before she could, a sudden punch hit her side. Then another. And just like that, she was lying on the ground, unable to move, Ty Lee and Mai standing above her.
Again, it took a moment until her mind had pieced the bits together and reality had sunken in.
Ty Lee had betrayed her as well. Mai had chosen Zuko and Ty Lee had chosen Mai, and now they were standing there, looking down from above.
Her oldest friends from childhood. The girls she had grown up with. For a moment, they seemed frozen as well. Until Ty Lee broke the silence. Not because she had anything else left to tell Azula. Just to tell Mai to get away. Which was useless, of course. There were guards, all around, and those girls had just attacked their princess.
“You are both fools.“ Azula in their direction as soon as she was finally on her feet again. She wanted to sound like she did not care. Like she did not feel like the actual fool in this. Looking at it now, all of this had been bound to happen, and she should have known that it would. After all, she had had to set a fire in the circus Ty Lee was traveling with in order to get her to help. And the way May had flung herself at Zuko since the day he had returned should have told her more than clearly where her loyalty lied. Where her loyalty had been lying all the time. With her oh so loveable brother. “Their choice was clear from the beginning,” another voice whispered in her head, “Just like for your mother. Just like for your uncle. Who would ever chose you? Who would ever take your hand if you would not be holding a knife in the other?”
“Shut It down, Azula.”, she responded to herself, desperately trying to get her thoughts back into control. Control. Control was the key. “You don’t need them. Friends are for people who are too weak to have servants.“
She took a deep breath in. Yes, she had made a mistake. She taken risks, and even worse, forgotten those risks existed. But she could make sure that would never happen again. And when one of the guards asked what to do next, she had my answer ready.
“Lock up them somewhere were I won’t have to see there faces ever again.“
Her voice sounded firm again, which Azula noticed with pride. As she continued, she looked Mai straight in the eye. She had wanted fear? She could get it.
„And let them rot.“
After they had been brought away, she saw the warden walking up to me. A pathetic excuse of a man, who had believed that the little power he possessed somehow made him greater than those around him. Just a big fish in a small pond who believed himself to be a shark. If he had done his job properly, none of this would have happened, Azula thought, knowing that that wasn’t the full truth, but definetly part of it. And that she wanted him to know.
When he started uttering something between an apology, an explanation and monologue of self pity, she therefore shut him down immediately.
“I am sorry, but where you talking to me? Because all I hear is the sound of failure. Which is quite pathetic, honestly“
You should have feared me more, she had told Mai. Now she would give them a reason too.
“Your actions lead to the escape of dangerous war criminals, not to mention a threat to my life. It was pure look your niece didn`t cut my throat.“
Azula paused, just to enjoy the sight of him twisting his hands in the desperate search for words. How many times had he been the one who made prisoners feel the way he felt now? The thought of this irony truly had something validating to it. “This not only gives you a record of failing at your job. This makes you man who endangered the fire nation and a member of its royal family. And that-“ she allowed herself one more dramatic break, “that is treason. And a man of your education should know what the penalty for treason is.“
He did not even have it in himself to give me an answer. Instead, he sunk down on his knees. She knew she could just kill him right away. One struck of lightning and he would be gone. Or make one of the guards do it. Just because Azula really started to enjoy this whole irony theme. But that would not be as effective as what she had in mind.
“But you are a lucky man warden,“ Azula said therefore. “A man should not have to die in the shame of his mistakes.“ Relieve started to build on his face, just to crumble again when she announced:
“So I am giving you away to restore your honor. Agni Kai.“
Azual felt good. She truly was in control again, seeing the way they all were looking at her, with fear and admiration balancing in their eyes. The way she deserved to be looked at. The way a future firelord deserved to be looked at.
The warden finally seemed to have found his voice again.
“Excuse me princess, what do you mean? You can’t possibly mean….you can’t seriously want…“
“Don`t tell me what I can. In fact, you should be thanking me for this chance to prove yourself. Or are not even man enough to accept this challenge? Can you only duel someone when they are in chains?“
“No, of course not! I can fight! But princess, I could never fight you!“ Though his protest did have something entertaining to it, Azual decided that it was time to finally get to the point.
“I am afraid you will have too. 5 minutes. Then it is on.“
Just enough time to put up her hair again properly. A few streaks had fallen out, and that was nothing she could use while fighting.
The fight that followed wasn’t even worth the name. A turtle duck would have been a better opponent, Azula thought, those things at least had shells. But surely it had served its cause: reminding the people here of where their loyalty had to lie. And who they had to admire.
She decided that was time to return to the palace and leave this episode behind.
Only that that was not possible. At least not directly, as she had to realize when she and her men came to the spot where my ballon was supposed to be. Zuko. He and his gang of war prisoners must have used it to escape, she concluded directly. And that was bad. Sure, they could sent for another one. But questions would be asked, which would be really difficult to answer. Normally, Azula didn’t tell her father about the missions she went on, just in case. If they were successful, he did not ask further questions. If they weren’t, he would never have to know. She sighed. Now he would, and she would have to explain what happened. To her father. That Zuko got way because she let him. All the confidence Azula has felt just moments ago came crumbling down again. Zuko, that idiot.
She noticed that a guard was talking to me, but his words did not really get through, her thoughts had taken her away too far already. How was it even possible that Zuko had out played her? He was Zuko, after all. Weak. A quitter. A runaway. “He did not outplay you.” a voice in her head answered. “You outplayed yourself by letting your emotions get in the way of your judgment.”
“Princess, princess, are you even listening?“ That annoying guard still had something to say, apparently.
“Oh shut it, will you?“, she screamed. “The next words I want to hear from you are `Princess Azula, your ballon has arrived.`if you dare to tell me anything else before that, I swear that the next person you can things to is someone from the spirit world.“
The guard opened his mouth, his eyes wide open, and then closed it again quickly. He nodded so fast and strong that his teeth were clicking together. Also not the most pleasing sound. Azual snapped her fingers and let a spark fly for emphasis.
“And now get of my view.“
He obeyed, and finally, there was silence again. Just the waves crashing against the shore. Waves above which somewhere her brother was flying with his new friends. While actually, she should be on my way home, with him as prisoner. Eager to tell her father of her success. And now instead, she would return a failure, not knowing how to face him. He would be disappointed, that was for sure. This had been their one chance at catching Zuko, and she had blown it. Blown it because she had not had my own people under control. Still, he had to hear it from her. Every other scenario was even worse, she knew that. But that didn’t really make it better at all.
Back at the place, Azula therefore sent for a servant and asked for a hearing directly. Luckily, it was granted to her soon, and fighting the urge to run back into the direction she had just come from, Azula made my way to the throne room, entered the heavy door and got close enough to her father to talk to him. There she knelt down.
“Azula, my daughter. What brings you here?“ His voice sounded so friendly. Azula felt her eyes water against her will, knowing very well that crying would be the worst thing possible to do. Instead, she therefore tried to sum up the events as good as possible, walking the small line between apology and not admitting failure. A silence followed, only interrupted by the beat of her heart. Firelord Ozai always took time before he reached a verdict.
“It is unfortunate your brother got away. Especially since this could have been prevented so easily. Did I not teach you to never trust others?“
Azul nodded. He did. I would not know of any person he had ever trusted with anything. He even cut his own hair because any hairdresser could potentially want him harm.
”But you did the right thing to challenge the warden. It gave proof that we will not tolerant weakness. And to not worry, the day of our triumph will come soon“
Azula did not know how to react. There were many things she had expected, possibilities that she had played out in her head. This definitely had not been one of them.
All she could so was stutter.
”You are not…angry with me?“
“No Azula. Now is not the time get upset about small mistakes. What counts now is the bigger picture. Our plans for the return of the comet.“
Her father paused, and then even added:
“I always knew you were stronger than your brother.“
„Yes father, Thank you.“, Azula responded, not knowing what else to say.
„You will be my heir one day. A worthy one.“
She still faced the ground, trying to comprehend her fathers words. She knew she was supposed to feel relieved. This was a kinder response than anything she ever could have hoped for. But deep down, she felt doubts that she had been pushing away for so long rising to the surface.
“He is showing mercy because he has no more child left to loose”. The thought struck her like a lightning. Of course, her father needed her because he needed legacy. Someone to pass his empire onto. Someone to pass his empire onto who was not Zuko.
And suddenly, Azula could not help but wonder “If I am stronger, then why am I the one on my knees?“