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Katsuki went a whopping two weeks without seeing Stain. He would like to say that they were pretty great weeks, but just like every other time in his life, when one bad thing went away, another took its place. Hero Killer Stain was replaced with the Destroyer of Katsuki's Happiness, the Anti-Katsuki, the Prick to End All Pricks, Best Jeanist.
"I hope you learned something, Bakugou," the man says from behind his fucking jurtleneck. "I did my best to teach you everything you needed to know and work on."
"Yeah, right," Katsuki says through clenched teeth, picking up his case with his hero costume. His hair is back in that stupid combed down look, but he'll fix it as soon as he leaves. "Thank you for everything. Bye."
He still has time before the hag is expecting him home, so he chooses to eat his packed dinner in the park. Big mistake on his part. He should know by now that whenever one pest leaves, another pops right up to fill the gap.
"Hello, Bakugou Katsuki," Stain says, and he almost doesn’t recognize him without the costume. The hero killer is currently dressed in a ripped hoodie and ripped jeans with sneakers that have probably seen better years. He's wearing a scarf over his face, probably to conceal his identity, and even the scarf is more or less falling apart. This fucker really doesn't own anything less than a decade old. Maybe he'd want to kill people less if he took a shower or some shit.
Katsuki is less surprised by the outfit and more by the fact that Stain is there at all.
"Bitch, you again? I thought you died," Katsuki says grumpily, ready to blast the grimy man to high heavens. The news said that Endeavor caught him, and that he died of some sort of medical complication. Katsuki had assumed that he just got his ass handed to him, and he wasn't all that upset about him. Bitches get stitches.
"I did, legally. But then I lived," Stain explains with a shrug, pulling the scarf down so he can speak more clearly. "I almost died in surgery, but then a doctor saved my life. Apparently she approves of my ideology, but she didn't want to get fired, so she pretended that I died and let me go."
"There really is no god," Katsuki says with a shake of his head. "So you came here so you can actually die? Because I'd be happy to do that for you."
"I'm just enjoying a day in the park. I didn't know that was illegal."
"Since when do you care about legality?"
"Fair point, although I would advise against attacking me in public. There are people watching, and I'm sure a video of you attacking a random homeless man would probably not do you very well. I'm technically dead, remember? Attacking me will do you no good."
Katsuki grimaces, but he knows that Stain is right. The press still hounds him whenever he goes out, and it feels like no matter what he does, they have some new bit of awful news to share about him on gossip sites: he didn't give his seat to an old lady on the bus; he flipped the bird to a cameraman; he cursed out loud when he dropped his lunch in the street. Brawling in public would only put him back in the tabloids.
Stain smiles, like he can read his mind. "So, Bakugou Katsuki, how was your internship? I hear UA just finished having those, although I was unable to observe yours, given I was being hunted down and almost killed and all."
"Fuck off, you're not my dad. I don't have to tell you anything." A pause. "On a completely unrelated note, would you be willing to murder Best Jeanist? Hypothetically, of course."
Stain raises an eyebrow. "Best Jeanist? I've observed nothing too bad from him, apart from the fact that he seems to be an image obsessed prick. Also, killing him now would constitute revenge killing, something I am very against."
"I wasn't being serious, calm your shit," Katsuki mutters. "But yeah, he is a major prick. I had to spend a week with him and he taught me jack shit about being a hero. All he did was give me a haircut and tell me to be nice to people who don't deserve it."
"Sounds like someone is regretting saying no to my mentorship."
"Fuck off, am not. I'm not gonna go around killing innocent people for kicks. I don't know what kind of 'real heroism' that would be, but I'm not buying it."
Stain looks surprised. "I was never going to ask you to kill people as part of your training, nor do I interpret what I do as heroism. I am a vigilante. It's my job to keep society in shape, even if my methods go outside of the confines of the law. I kill villains too, all sorts of rotten people, but that never gets covered in the news because that would confuse the public. As I told you before, they like seeing things in black and white. Having someone who is neither hero nor villain, such as myself, makes them think too much. Hurts their little heads.
"So what would this training consist of?" Katsuki asks. There's still no way he would ever agree to it, but he's still intrigued.
"Mostly psychological lessons. How to get your priorities straight, how to deal with villains humanely, why most of the heroes today are flawed in their own ideologies."
"That's fucking rich, coming from you."
"Again, never said I was a hero." He looks thoughtful. "I wanted to be a hero, once. Went to a minor heroics-based high school, interned with some heroes, all that jazz. But I found that my talents were wasted in the hero business. I was surrounded by frauds, corrupt young adults who would go on to be even more corrupt heroes. I almost killed one of my coworkers during an internship, and from then on I went below the law."
"Why'd you almost kill him?"
"He injured someone, while on patrol. Badly. An innocent bystander, too, a shopkeeper. He was told to send an apology card to the hospital, and he did, but he never visited her in person." Stain grits his teeth together. "He said that it was part of the job, people around getting hurt, just collateral damage to keep the public safe. I told him that was bullshit."
It's weird, seeing genuine emotion from Stain. Katsuki doesn't like seeing him as an actual person. It makes it harder for him to want to blast his face off.
"Best Jeanist said that the point of patrol was to watch for villains and for heroes to make a public face for themselves," he says, slumping on the bench as he remembers his failed first attempt. "Went down like a lead balloon. I scared some little brats."
"Sounds about right, coming from that man. He's all about his public face, even though he keeps his hidden." Stain looks over at him. "Why do you think hero popularity is so important?"
"I dunno, because people will want to be saved more by someone who they trust?"
"People want to be saved by someone competent," Stain corrects him. "A truly desperate person doesn't care who saves them. If I offered to save someone from a burning building, they wouldn't say no."
"Alright, maybe they just wanna be comforted when they're in danger." As Aizawa-sensei always tells him, this is his weak point. He can't bring himself to be fake warm and comforting ever, especially in a high stress situation like a rescue scenario. He does what he has to do, that's all.
"Would you consider Endeavor to be a comforting figure? I doubt it, but he has many fans regardless of his cold demeanor. Any other guesses?" Stain's eyes are gleaming; they always do when he gets into his ideology, Katsuki notices. He would make a good teacher, besides for the whole murderer part.
He thinks hard about it. "Heroes are important in culture... there's a ton of merch for them everywhere. People like celebrities, I guess?"
"Close, but no cigar." Stain leans forward, like he's about to share a secret. "People like feeling safe. Seeing heroes everywhere, all big and powerful, flaunting themselves wherever they go, comforts them. But at the same time, people who are too powerful are scary. Imagine how All Might would be perceived if it weren't for his signature smile and catchphrase. If he would only show up for the battle, then fly away immediately after incapacitating them with one blow."
Katsuki imagines All Might's glinting blue eyes, larger than life stature, and grimaces a little. "He would seem dangerous. People would be scared of him."
"Precisely." Stain leans back again. "What makes All Might a good hero is that he balances his public face with his heroic one. When he goes out, it's never just to take pictures or endorse a product. He's always saving someone, or helping someone out at the very least."
"So you're saying Best Jeanist was right about me having to be friendlier?" Katsuki's starting to get a little sour at Stain. The only reason he started talking to him to begin with was to complain about Best Jeanist, and now the vigilante was agreeing with him?
"I don't agree with everything about Best Jeanist. His brand is too focused on sex appeal for my taste." Katsuki almost chokes on his water. "But he is right in the sense that you shouldn't make yourself a hated or feared figure who people only put up with because you're powerful. You're a hero to protect people. Act like it."
"It feels fake to me, pretending that I like brats and annoying fuckers," Katsuki argues. "Aren't you anti-fake stuff?"
Stain's eyes narrow. "It shouldn't be fake, is what I'm saying. If you really wanna be a hero, you should want to save them. The concept of people shouldn't bother you, because if it does, then what are you fighting for?"
He stands up, and it feels too soon. Katsuki isn't done talking. "Wait," he says, his head hurting with conflicting views and ideas swirling around at lightning speed.
Stain pauses, turns to him. "Yes?"
"Besides for All Might, who's a real hero to you?" Trying to be like All Might is an unattainable task for him, at least right now, but maybe if he gives him someone easier to copy, then he can somehow change himself.
"In the hero community, there are a handful. Best Jeanist is pretty close, surprisingly, along with Crust, Ryukyu, and Thirteen. I would consider Eraserhead to have been a real hero too, back when he was an active hero." He taps his chin. "I met a few of your classmates too, you know. Outside of the sports festival."
Katsuki was floored. "Did you also offer to mentor them? Shit, did you go to everyone in my class?"
"No, of course not. I don't ask every hero student I see, you know. In fact, I almost killed two of them." His gaze takes on a wistful look. "I don't like killing children, but they were trying to stop me from my work, and that was highly irritating. They also attacked me first, so-"
"Who were they?" Katsuki didn't hear anything about his classmates encountering Stain before. Did Endeavor even really fight him, or was it just my classmates?
"Let's see... Ingenium's brother, Endeavor's son, and..." He grins a little. "A green haired guy. Midoriya, they called him. If you want to be a real hero, I'd suggest following him. He has his priorities in line."
Katsuki almost blows up his lunch sack. "You gotta be shitting me. Of course Deku already won you over. Why am I not surprised?"
"Deku? You know him personally?"
"We were fucking childhood friends. It's complicated." He leans his head back, staring at the sky. "Everyone thinks he shits gold or something, but I don't get it. What makes him so good?"
Stain sits back down on the edge of the bench, temporarily getting back into the conversation. "You know him better than I do. Why does he want to be a hero?"
Katsuki thinks back to those afternoons at Deku's house, watching the same clip of All Might over and over again. He got sick of it pretty quickly, but Deku was hooked on it. "He's obsessed with saving people and All Might. It's almost creepy."
Stain snaps his fingers. "That's exactly what a hero should be like. It's saving people first, beating up villains second. You have your priorities mixed up, Bakugou Katsuki. You might not be able to be a comforting presence like this Deku is, but at the very least, you should enjoy saving them. If not, then I believe you should re-evaluate your career choice."
Katsuki doesn't know what to say to that, and Stain takes his silence as a cue to stand up again. "Cheer up. Like I said before, you have time to improve. Even if you're not willing to take my help, I would be satisfied if you helped yourself become better. I know you don't do well with criticism, but if you know that you need it, you shouldn't get upset about it. It's all up to you."
He wraps his scarf back around his face, picks up his bag, and walks off. It's less dramatic than last time, watching him cross the street in broad daylight. Katsuki stays seated, staring at his crumpled bag.
Saving people first, beating up villains second. Katsuki doesn't generally like people. He's paranoid to a fault, suspicious of everyone's intentions. Friendly people grate on him, and callous people - like himself - grate on him more. Is it even possible for me to be a real hero like this? How do I suddenly start liking people?
He thinks over Stain’s list of acceptable heroes. Best Jeanist is been there, done that, and he doesn’t very well have access to any of the other heroes he listed. All Might is tied to Deku, and I’m sure as fuck not asking Deku for advice.
Wait. There was one more. Eraserhead. He stood up for Katsuki during the sports festival. In terms of staff, he’s probably Katsuki’s favorite. Plus, he seems to dislike talking to people just as much as Katsuki does, and yet he’s still a good rescue hero.
Can I really just ask him? He’ll think I’m insane, trying to learn how to like people. He’ll think I’m more unstable than he already does.
But... it might be nice, not having to fake smile whenever they do rescue exercises. He doesn’t want to be fake nice, but he also doesn’t want to be hated forever, regardless of how he may be perceived. Nobody wants to be alone forever; nobody likes to be the media’s personal punching bag.
He approaches his homeroom teacher during lunch, when he knows he’ll be alone in the teacher’s room. Amazingly enough, he’s not asleep, and instead standing by the coffeepot.
”Sensei,” Katsuki starts, knocking on the door. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
Aizawa-sensei pauses mid-pour, looking up at him. “What is it, Bakugou?”
Here comes the hard part. “I want-“ fuck, this is hard, “-to not... hate people. To be a better hero. How do you deal with people?”
Aizawa-sensei blinks at him. “I won’t say that I expected this, but I’m glad you came to talk to me. I can tell that social interaction is hard for you, and it’s good that you acknowledge this. It doesn’t make you a bad person, by the way.”
”I know,” Katsuki says, semi-honestly. “I just wanna be better at it.”
”Then you’ve come to the right place. I don’t know if you can tell, but I really dislike people.”
Katsuki cracks a smile for the first time all day. “You don’t say.”
”Quiet, child.” He takes his coffee mug and carries it over to the table. “Come, sit. If I can learn to teach alongside Present Mic every day, I can teach you to deal with anyone.”