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Rafael stops short as he follows Sonny into the hotel room. They're not supposed to be stopping for the night, but an absolutely blinding thunderstorm had snuck up on them--sky going black so quickly Rafael had briefly thought he was having some sort of vision issues--and it hadn't let up for the hour they crawled down the highway looking for any sort of cover to wait it out.
"There's only one bed," Rafael says, staring at the bed in question.
"So?" Sonny asks, tossing his duffel to one side and yanking his sweater over his head in one, quick motion. He's wearing a white tank undershirt underneath, and Rafael stares openly since Sonny can't see him. Sonny kicks off his shoes and strips out of his soaked jeans, then flops face first onto the bed with a groan. "Fuck, my head hurts."
Rafael snaps out of the quiet lust running through his body at the sight of Sonny in nothing but boxer briefs and puts down his own duffel so he can strip out of his own soaked clothes. "Can I get you anything?" he asks quietly as he walks over to the wall to figure out how to turn on the heat. The room isn't uncomfortable, but the rain had started turning to sleet as they'd spotted the hotel, so he figures it's only a matter of time before the temperature drops.
"I've got ibuprofen in my bag," Sonny says, turning his head so he isn't speaking into the comforter. "800 miligrams and some water."
Rafael gets the water first, then crouches by Sonny's duffel and searches until he finds the ibuprofen. He taps four pills into his palm, then walks over to give them to Sonny. Sonny's flipped onto his back and dragged himself into a sitting position, and Rafael keeps his eyes above Sonny's shoulders as Sonny takes the pills from him.
Sonny tosses back the ibuprofen, then takes a long drink of water. He wipes his mouth on the back of his hand, and gives Rafael a small smile of thanks when Rafael takes the glass from his hand. "Thanks," he says.
"Least I can do," Rafael replies, turning to put the glass on the nightstand. Sonny'd been the one driving through the weather, even as the strain of it had started making him hurt. "Want to order food or wait until your head is better?"
"My head should be good in about twenty minutes, so if we order now, I'll be fine by the time it gets up here," Sonny says. He presses his palms to his eyes, breathes in slowly, and then releases the breath. Rafael watches his muscles relax and makes himself look away again.
He puts on a pair of pajama pants before looking at the menu for the hotel restaurant. "Burgers?" he asks.
"Yeah," Sonny replies.
"Beer?"
"Sure."
Rafael calls down to the kitchen to place the order while Sonny stands and puts on his own pajama pants. He also adds a pair of thick, woolen socks with polka dots on them. He stretches from head to toe, groaning when his back pops, then drops forward to touch the floor. Rafael finishes his call and hangs up the phone. Sonny's straightening up slowly, clearly concentrating on keeping his body loose.
"I didn't know you did yoga," Rafael says when Sonny's standing up straight again and has opened his eyes.
"I should do it more, honestly," Sonny says as he drops into a low lunge and stretches his arms out from his sides. "I always feel better after I do it, but I talk myself out of it too much."
"That's a bit too familiar," Rafael replies, stretching his legs out straight in front of him and flexing his toes.
"Well, there's room enough over here if you want to join me," Sonny says.
Rafael considers saying no, but he's too weak to actually say it. The idea of being near Sonny like this is too much temptation to turn down. He feels like a teenager as he stands and walks over to face Sonny and mirror his pose. He wants to say something clever or witty, make Sonny laugh quietly. Maybe distract him enough he wobbles as he changes positions and teases Rafael for causing it.
He doesn't say anything. Instead, he works through every pose Sonny takes. From a left low lunge, to a right low lunge. A sun salute. Pyramid pose.
"You keep staring," Sonny says as he straightens up again and lightly shakes out his hands. "Am I doing something wrong?"
"No," Rafael says, feeling even more like a teenager as his stomach tumbles at the fact he hasn't been able to hide how he can't look away from Sonny's body. "I'm just…" He looks Sonny up and down quickly, hoping it looks a bit impersonal. "You move well," he says because it's true. "It's nice to watch."
Sonny smiles. "Thanks. You, too. Although, I'm not surprised. You always move like you know what you're doing."
"Well, I try," Rafael says lightly and is pleased when Sonny chuckles. "How's your head?"
"Improving," Sonny says. He turns his head to the right and left, working his chin up and down a few times. There's a small series of pops, and Sonny relaxes like his strings have been cut. "There it is," he murmurs.
"That sounded promising," Rafael says, copying Sonny's movements and sighing when his own neck loosens considerably. "I'll need to remember that one."
"It's something I learned in PT in high school," Sonny says. "I landed wrong after pole vault and had to do some work to get my neck unfucked."
"You were on the track team?"
"Yeah."
"I wouldn't have guessed," Rafael says. "You've never mentioned it," he adds when Sonny gives him a questioning look.
"Well, I didn't peak in high school, so it doesn't seem that interesting, I guess," Sonny says.
Rafael laughs and watches the way Sonny smiles at him, like he's pleased he could make Rafael do that. Before Rafael can say anything else, there's a knock on the door. It's unquestionably their dinner, and Rafael lets Sonny get the door while he yanks the comforter down the bed so they don't get anything on it while they eat.
They prop themselves up on the pillows and channel surf, settling quickly on the local news as they eat their burgers and drink their beers. Rafael takes Sonny's dishes and stacks them on top of his own, then places the full stack in the hallway for an employee to pick up whenever they do rounds.
When he comes back into the room, Sonny's in the bathroom brushing his teeth. "You must be exhausted," he says. It's barely after nine, and Rafael knows Sonny has it in him to stay up later most nights.
"Tension headaches kick my ass," Sonny says through a mouthful of toothpaste, and Rafael worries he finds it charming. Sonny spits out the toothpaste and rinses his mouth. "Don't worry about having the television on. I can sleep through anything."
"Okay," Rafael says. "I'll probably just have it on for background noise while I look over the notes for the extradition."
"Oh, come on, you could probably recite the whole file by now," Sonny says, squeezing Rafael's shoulder like he has plenty of times when Rafael's been wearing a shirt. But he's not wearing a shirt, and Sonny's hand is very warm, and Rafael makes a quiet sound without meaning to. Sonny lets go of his shoulder instantly. "You okay?" he asks. "Did you tweak something when we were stretching?"
"No," Rafael says, clearing his throat. "It's fine. It's nothing." Sonny looks concerned. Rafael takes two steps back so he's not crowding Sonny into the bathroom. "But you're right. I probably do know the file well enough. I have a book with me. I'll try to relax."
"That's the spirit," Sonny says, giving Rafael another smile as he climbs into the bed, pulling the comforter up to his waist. He pulls his tank off and reaches behind him to drag his pillows flat. He lies back and stretches. His saint's medal slips sideways and comes to rest on his left pec. Rafael stretches his fingers to settle the urge to reach out and straighten it.
"No bedtime prayers?" he jokes.
Sonny grins at him, then closes his eyes. "I prayed a lot while I was driving. Pretty sure I'm covered for the day."
"Doesn't sound very Catholic to me," Rafael murmurs and enjoys the way Sonny's quiet laugh makes his whole body shake lightly. "Good night," he says.
"Night," Sonny replies.
Rafael stares blankly at the television for a few minutes as Sonny shifts a bit and then settles into sleep. Rafael's book is in his bag, but he doesn't want to get out of bed in case it wakes up Sonny. He flips channels, looking for something mindless, but nothing catches his eye. He checks his emails on his phone, then tries to start an ebook he picks at random. He makes it half a chapter before he gives it up for useless.
Sonny's snoring quietly, sleeping on his side with his face towards Rafael. He has one hand under the pillow, and his other is flat on the mattress. Rafael watches him sleep, trying to put the shape of Sonny under the comforter deep into his memory.
He sighs silently at himself as he turns to put his phone on the nightstand and turn off the light. His crush is getting out of control. He's known that for awhile, but tonight's just made the want sharper. Sonny had spent the entire hour in the rain concentrating on the road and, every few minutes, assuring Rafael that things were fine. They had enough gas. They had snacks. If they had to pull over and wait things out, there was a blanket in the trunk to keep them warm.
Rafael hadn't told Sonny he was fine or asked Sonny to stop. It was soothing to hear Sonny remind him over and over that things were fine – even as they hydroplaned from a stop sign and nearly went into a ditch, Sonny stayed calm and reassured Rafael.
Those reassurances--warm and unfailing--were the final hit against Rafael's defenses. Sonny's kindness and intelligence, his determination and friendliness, his will to learn and to grow, those had already put plenty of cracks in Rafael's hard outer shell. The way he carried himself and how his legs and ass looked in his suits, that just pushed the cracks that much wider.
But now, lying in bed--in the only goddamn bed--with Sonny's hair falling over his eyes and his snores barely audible, Rafael knows he's absolutely fucking sunk. Because Sonny had dropped right off to sleep, no concern about sharing the bed or of Rafael keeping him up. Rafael's walls are dust, and all he wants to do is lean over and kiss Sonny on the cheek.
He doesn't. He pulls the covers up and turns off the light. He turns to sleep facing Sonny. It's a king bed. They're nowhere near touching. He stays awake for awhile, simply watching Sonny sleep. It'll be nice to know what he looks like later, when Rafael is alone at night and wanting something soft and comforting to imagine. Sonny asleep will fit the bill nicely.
*
When Rafael wakes up the next morning, the room is downright cold. Sonny's on the room phone, hopping from one foot to the other, goosebumps all over his chest and arms.
"Okay, yeah, no problem. Could you send up coffee and a couple extra blankets? We'll bundle up. Okay. Thanks." He hands up and turns to Rafael as he rubs his hands up and down his own arms. "You don't want to get out of bed," he says. "The rain turned to sleet, and that turned to ice, and then a transformer blew and took out half the power in town. There's a crew working on it, but apparently there are trees down all over town, so it may take awhile."
"Shit," Rafael says, pulling the covers over himself instinctively. "Get back in bed."
"Nah, coffee and blankets will be here in a sec. I'll get bundled up while I wait."
Sonny walks over to his duffle and digs out a long-sleeved shirt, and then a sweatshirt. He pulls both on, then pulls out another pair of thick socks and tosses them on the bed. They're covered in tiny ducks.
"Always fashionable," Rafael says, smiling at the socks.
"Well, I learned from the best," Sonny replies with a grin. He gestures to Rafael's bag. "Can I grab you anything?"
"There's a thermal in there, and another pair of socks."
Sonny gets them and brings them to Rafael, then sits on the edge of the bed to put his second pair of socks over his first. "The manager says they have some lanterns if we need light, but the windows are double-paned, so I figured it'd probably be fine just to open the curtains."
"Works for me," Rafael says, pulling his T-shirt off with a shiver so he can put on his thermal. He layers his T-shirt over it, then grabs for his socks. He catches Sonny in the corner of his eye, quietly watching him as he moves. "What?" Rafael asks.
Sonny shakes his head and grins. It's self-effacing. "Nothing," he says. "Just wondering if you're a thermal-and-tee guy on the weekends."
"Sometimes," Rafael says. "It depends what I'm doing. But if I'm just around my apartment, yes."
"I'd love to see it," Sonny replies.
Rafael stops short, staring at him. Sonny looks shocked that he's said that. "What'd--" a knock on the door interrupts Rafael.
"Coming!" Sonny yells and jumps off the bed.
Rafael curses under his breath as he listens to Sonny talk to the staff person at the door. A minute later, the door closes, and Sonny walks back into Rafael's line of sight. He has three blankets tucked under one arm, and a thermos and small plastic bag in his free hand.
"The kitchen's got a gas stove, so they were able to heat up water for coffee," Sonny says as he dumps the blankets on the foot of the bed. "And they sent up some fruit and yogurt in case we were hungry. If we want something else, they say they'll comp meals until the power's back."
"That's generous," Rafael says, holding out his hand for the thermos. Sonny passes it over with a grin, then climbs back onto the bed and under the comforter. He sets the plastic bag on his pillows and shakes out the other blankets, tucking one behind them, laying the second on Rafael's legs, and then tucking the third around himself.
Rafael takes a drink of coffee straight from the thermos and passes it to Sonny. Sonny takes his own drink and passes it back. He pulls three apples, an orange, and a pear from the bag, then two small cups of yogurt and two plastic spoons.
"They're both blueberry," Sonny says, passing a yogurt and a spoon to Rafael. He opens his own and stirs it.
Rafael takes another drink of coffee, then puts the lid back on the thermos, settling the thermos itself between the two of them. Sonny scoots a bit closer, whether to keep the thermos upright or to get some of the warmth, Rafael doesn't know. He briefly considers that maybe Sonny's just using it as an excuse to get close to him but shakes his head at himself.
"What?" Sonny asks, having caught the motion.
"Nothing," Rafael says. "Just thinking."
"What about?" Sonny asks. He takes a bite of his yogurt and a little bit gets caught at the corner of his mouth.
"Nothing important," Rafael replies, waiting for Sonny to wipe the yogurt away. He takes a second bite, apparently unaware he's left anything on his face.
Rafael opens his own yogurt, and they eat in silence. It's comfortable. The second layer of clothes and blankets are warming Rafael up. By the time he finishes his yogurt, he almost feels prepared to get out of the warm bed to go and use the bathroom.
"How cold do you think the bathroom is?" He asks.
Sonny laughs. "Probably colder than in here. All that tile? It's gonna cool down faster."
Rafael makes a face, counts to three, and slips out from under the covers. "I'm so glad I only have to pee."
Sonny laughs again.
Rafael hurries to the bathroom and pees, then does a quick brush of his teeth with just the icy cold water and his toothbrush. When he walks back into the room proper, Sonny's cleaned up the yogurt containers, and started on an apple. The bit of yogurt that had stuck to the corner of his mouth is gone.
Rafael gets back under the covers with as little jostling as possible, not wanting any cold air to follow behind. When he's settled, Sonny gestures to the fruit, and Rafael takes the pear. They eat their fruit and drink more coffee, and then Sonny sighs gustily and makes a show of getting out of the bed to go to the bathroom.
When he comes back out, his hair is somewhat combed. He gets back under the blankets, then reaches behind him for the one he'd tucked behind them, pulling it up to his shoulders and offering half to Rafael.
"Conserving body heat?" Rafael asks, unable to not make a joke. It's entirely too tempting to simply curl into Sonny's side and enjoy the closeness.
"Sure," Sonny says with a grin. "Or maybe I'm finally making a move."
Rafael pauses in pulling the blanket around him. He looks at Sonny's face. Sonny's watching him, that openness he carries like it's nothing as bright on his face as it always is. "I...wouldn't be opposed to a move being made," Rafael says slowly.
Sonny's whole face lights up. "Yeah?"
Rafael feels himself smile. Sonny's gleeful enthusiasm is infectious. "I've thought about it," he says.
"Me, too," Sonny replies. "Obviously, I mean." He says, and that self-effacing smile is back and even more charming than usual. "When I woke up, you were still asleep, and you just looked...I don't know. It was just nice to wake up and see you, and I've wondered what that would be like."
"You have?" Rafael asks. He finally manages to finish tucking the blanket around himself and holds still for just a moment before deciding to go for broke and curling against Sonny like he'd just been wanting to do.
Sonny touches his hand to Rafael's lower back, and when Rafael responds by throwing his legs over Sonny's lap, Sonny slides his arm around Rafael's waist. "I've had a crush on you for a long time," Sonny says quietly. He presses his nose into Rafael's hair, and Rafael can feel how cold it is. But Sonny's breath is warm against his scalp. "I've tried to be respectful about it, not make a thing of it, but it's been getting harder."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Every time I learn something new about you, or I see you do something impressive, I just get this rush like...I don't know. Just this rush of excitement, I guess. Because I get to know you, and it just makes me want to know you more."
Rafael doesn't answer right away. He's struck by Sonny's confession, how easily he lays out something as clearly personal as his feelings. He has to swallow a few times before he feels like he has his words together. "I'm not eloquent in my feelings like you are," he says. "But...I feel the same."
Sonny smiles against Rafael's scalp, then dips his head down so their foreheads are touching. "Can I kiss you?"
"Yes."
It's brief and soft and gentle. Rafael feels appreciated and cared for. The second kiss is a bit more fun. Sonny sucks lightly on his bottom lip, then shifts so their noses bump. Rafael smiles into the third kiss and grabs the front of Sonny's sweatshirt so he can't get away.
They lay down on the bed, covered in blankets. Sonny gets pillows for them both, chafing his hands on them so they're not icy when they place them under their heads. They hold hands under the blankets and watch each other in silence before quietly starting to talk through all the things they've wanted to say to each other.
In the early afternoon, when the power clicks back on and the heater roars to life, they don't leave the bed right away. Rafael pulls Sonny close, and Sonny naps, his head on Rafaelf's chest, while Rafael dozes in the warmth they've gathered around themselves and hopes just a little that the roads won't be clear right away.