Chapter Text
Jyuto rings the doorbell. Narrowed heterochromatic eyes peer from the crack in the door.
“Is Jiro-kun there? We have a prior engagement. I do hope he’s not running late.”
The eyes stare for a long, unblinking moment, then the door is slammed shut. A muffled “Ichi-nii, stupid Jiro’s in trouble!” echoes over loud steps pounding through the walls; the door is thrown open a moment later by a panicked Ichiro.
"Oh, it's just you…" He blows out a relieved breath though his back remains stiff with tension, likely wondering why the second member of MTC is at his doorstep.
Jyuto raises an eyebrow. “You know, there’s really no need for all this suspicion. I’m not going to throw him in the trunk and deliver him to Samatoki for whatever nefarious scenario you’re probably rationalizing my presence here now.”
“Er…”
That is exactly what he’s thinking, isn’t he? These kids... Jyuto rolls his eyes. “He did tell you why I’m here, yes?”
His silence is answer enough. Clearing his throat Jyuto straightens, and declares with a gleam in his eye, “I have come to inform you that earlier today, Jiro Yamada has been charged with jaywalking, public intoxication, and being a general nuisance to the citizens of Yokohama. I am here in official capacity to escort him to the station.”
Ichiro pales.
“That was all, of course, a blatant lie.”
Ah, as unstable as he can be, Yumeno-sensei is undoubtedly rubbing off on him. Jyuto doesn’t hold back a simpering snicker as the color floods back into Ichiro’s cheeks.
“Don’t give me a heart attack like that! Damn, I really thought Jiro was in trouble…”
The fact that he admits that so quickly makes Jyuto worried on how much of a delinquent Jiro can be if he puts his mind to it -- but that train of thought crashes just as bad as said kid nearly tumbles down the stairs.
"Nii-chan!” He just barely stops from barreling into Ichiro. “You still got the keys for the rental car?"
“Uh. Yeah?”
“Me and Nerd Glasses here’ll return it for you. Don’t even sweat the small stuff, Big Bro. I gotchu!”
“O-oh. Thanks, Jiro.” The keys are plucked from his hand. Jyuto gives a jaunty two-fingered salute, complete with his trademark grin, while Jiro blasts off in an excited run towards the car. Ichiro waves the two off, pride for his younger brother willingly taking on responsibility making him smile a tired grin. He walks back into the house in a happy trance.
Twenty minutes later his scream rings through the house, scaring Saburo:
“Wait a second… Jiro can’t drive.”
______
"You remember the pre-driving checklist?"
"Yup!" Jiro enthusiastically confirms. "Seat adjusted, mirrors set, seatbelt on. MC MB's lookin' fresh, baby!" He flashes a cocky smile and finger guns the rearview mirror.
Ah, Jyuto suppresses a smile, this is why he gets bullied by Saburo-kun. He's too easy of a target. "You're forgetting one very important thing."
"What?"
"Start the car."
"...Oh."
He starts the car. He falters with the ignition so it chugs haltingly. "We'll work on that," Jyuto sighs. "Let's get started, shall we? Pull away from the curb..."
If every driving session had been as chaotic as their first one, Jyuto thinks he might never venture out into Ikebukuro’s streets for fear of encountering a Yamada’s driving in the wild. Thankfully, it seems he does not have to suspend Jiro’s non-existent driver’s license for good yet; the boy’s shown amazing progress in the few sessions they've spent -- which amounts to no more screaming when he goes two miles over the speed limit or revs the engine by pushing the gas too hard on accident.
“Keep your eye on the road, not the speedometer,” says Jyuto for the twentieth time. For a rowdy youth, Jiro sure is careful about the law.
“Gentle brakes, gentle,” Jyuto hisses, the car’s momentum jerking him forward when they stop at a red light. “Try to think ahead when you see the stoplight turning red.”
“Sorry, sorry...”
“Abrupt stops are the main causes of rear ends.” He’s not done lecturing. “Your reflexes may be fast enough to avoid it, but there’s no reason to put them to the test all the time.”
“But you just told me to keep my eye on the road!”
“You have to strike a balance. Be aware that the light is changing and adjust your speed according to how the other cars might react. I’m sure you’re capable enough.”
“Wait, you think my reflexes are fast? Was that a compliment, Four Eyes?”
“Hmph. If the shoe fits.” Jyuto looks away in a huff, embarrassed at his slip-up. “Now, switch into the other lane.”
“But I hate switching lanes,” Jiro whines. “It’s so stressful.”
“Then that is exactly why we must practice. Remember to watch your blind spot.”
“Tricky...” Jiro fusses, but does as he says. He blows out a tense breath once he's done. “Can't the other drivers on the road give me space or something, sheesh--"
"Don't you dare assume such a thing!"
Jyuto's sudden outburst surprises Jiro. The passenger side simmers with fiery passion. "Assume everyone you see on the road is an imbecile. Plan your driving accordingly. The only person you can trust is yourself. Do not rely on anyone."
"Uh…"
"The average person behind the wheel does not know their left from their right. Indicator? Hah, pray tell, what's that? Absolute buffoonery out there I tell you."
He laughs mockingly. It's the most ruthless sound Jiro has ever heard from him. He is afraid to look. "Anyway, honk to establish dominance. Poor saps might get a heart attack and slam the brakes. Predictable, really."
Wow. This dude gets really heated about driving etiquette. Jiro gets the feeling that all these "helpful tips" are fueled by one too many personal experiences on the road. Jiro just smiles and nods and vows not to take them to heart.
When his temper finally cools and Jiro is on the verge of asking what happens to the car if he hits the brakes and the accelerator at the same time -- it takes a screenshot of the, uh, windshield? Dunno, that’s his best guess -- Jyuto’s phone rings.
They’re in a tiny suburban neighborhood: few cars, with plenty of opportunities to practice turns and full four-way stops. Out the corner of his eye he sees Jyuto heave a breath at the caller. “Ugh. I have to take this.” Damn he sounds so unenthused. “I’m putting him on Bluetooth. Trust me, it’ll be healthy for his ego.”
The offending caller turns out to be Samatoki, when his voice fills the car. “Where are you?” He says without preamble.
“Around. What do you want?”
“Bastard. No you’re not.”
“What’s it to you? Have you gotten yourself into another useless squabble and have need of my assistance?”
“Hah! Wouldn’t even beg for it.”
“You should. Begging would be a nice change of pace for you. It’d be humbling.”
This is how MTC talks to one another? Jiro tries his best to keep a straight face amongst the bickering.
"No need to be fiesty, little bunny." Samatoki laughs as if he’s watching the distaste twist Jyuto’s face in person. “If you’re gonna be that way then I guess you can’t come over for these cookies I just baked.”
“Excuse me, did I hear that correctly? You… baked cookies?”
Jyuto shoots a bewildered look at Jiro, as if the kid has any idea what he’s talking about. For his part, Jiro is both curious and deathly afraid to ask if that is a euphemism for something and if being a yakuza meant you had to be this weird.
Good thing being coy isn’t Samatoki’s thing, as is evident when he roars, “Damn straight! Made some bomb-ass cookies, too. Chocolate chip or bust, none of that oatmeal-raisin shit. I’ll leave the bowl for you to lick later.”
“That’s not what I…” Jyuto starts, then gives up with a sigh. “If this is what you called me for then I’m afraid I’m busy, Samatoki.”
“Fine by me.” He munches on a cookie, carefree. “Stay that way, you sugar-hatin’ freak.”
“I don’t hate sugar, I hate you…”
“Stop soundin’ so pissed. You need to fucking relax. If cookies ain’t your thing, what about a show?”
“A show?” asks Jyuto haltingly.
“Yeah, since you’re ‘busy’ doing god knows what. Here me and Riou are, schedules all cleared up and you can’t even appreciate that.”
“Riou’s with you? Good grief, let me talk to him instead. Lord knows he’s better company than you.”
“Riou is… occupied,” and the careful choice of words on Samatoki’s part is suspicious, smirk traveling down the line, “In fact he’s got his, ah, hands tied up with something in the other room. He’s been real, heh, hard at work warming up the bed so I’m thinking to give him a little treat that’s got nothin’ to do with desserts, ya feel me?”
Jiro swerves. Jyuto chokes violently.
Samatoki chuckles, low and pleased. “I think you’re pickin’ up what I’m putting down. We were waiting for you, you know. But I’m getting impatient and you're a prick so I’m just gonna take what I want. You’re lucky I’m generous enough to put you on speaker so you can hear how much Riou is enjoying getting fucked nice and deep--”
Jiro swerves again, knuckles white against the steering wheel. “MAKE HIM STOP!” He can’t take it anymore.
“...Jyuto what the hell’re you doin’ arresting a preteen.”
It's like a bucket of ice water got dumped on everyone, the whole situation turning abruptly sober. Jyuto jolts into action, and if Jiro wasn’t so traumatized at the moment he’d make fun of how gracelessly he scrambles to turn off the bluetooth. A few harsh whispers into the receiver on his phone are exchanged, and then finally, finally he ends the call.
Jiro slams on the brakes in the middle of the street. “What the hell was that?”
“I--”
“That was a sex thing," he interrupts, covering his ears in shock. "That was so a sex thing. Ew ew ew ew ew ew, I cannot believe you made me listen to that!”
“I didn’t make you do anything, nor did I expect that!” Jyuto shoots back. He resolutely looks straight ahead. He does not meet Jiro’s disgusted gaze. His face is still red.
“I’m telling nii-chan.”
“Please don’t.” Jyuto shivers. Getting another Yamada involved is all sorts of bad. “This stays between us. We’ll go to McDonalds and I’ll let you get whatever you want.”
The long silence tells him the bribe might have been a risky gamble.
“...And you’ll pay for everything?”
Oh. Of course the kid loves McDonalds. Phew. Narrow escape. “Deal.”
______
Fast food is a godsend. The experience of ordering drive-thru without looking at the prices is a novel experience for Jiro, completely smitten with being on the driver’s side for the first time and handing off Jyuto’s credit card at the window like he’s made of money. They dig into their meals in the parking lot ten minutes later, and Jyuto believes the Bluetooth Incident is far behind them now. Besides, Jiro is far more occupied trying to steal the rest of his fries.
“It goes good with my milkshake,” he whines. He tries again for a swipe and succeeds in snagging some. Jyuto lets it happen, putting up a farce of a fight. The kid’s had two Big Macs already. It’s sickeningly impressive.
“So like, I thought about it,” Jiro says with his mouth full, “and now I know there’s definitely something fucky goin’ on.”
“For the love of god, please stop thinking about how I spend my sex life--”
“No, I didn't mean it like that! I don’t ever wanna think about your kinky sex things. Ugh,” he shivers. “What I meant is that you’re a cheating scumbag.”
What. What, he thinks. " Nani?" he says, stupefied.
“How could you?” Jiro cries. “Yeah, he’s a stick in the mud, but Tsutsujimori-sensei is a good guy! You’ve got some nerve cheating on him, getting yer rocks off with the two most dangerous weirdos of Yokohama and not even feeling the least bit embarrassed at getting caught. You might be a dirty cop but you have to know where to draw the line. You can’t just do that shit.”
He looks genuinely upset, not meeting Jyuto’s eyes for a completely different reason now. And it... hurts, where being dishonest for other things in his life never made him think twice as long as it meant justifying the means. Maybe it’s seeing the trust evaporate in Jiro’s words that have his heart squeezed in a vice, breath choked off with simply a flicker of intense regret.
He takes off his glasses, slowly wiping at them to buy time. He clears his throat. “I’m impressed you figured out that me and Rosho are dating, considering we haven’t told anyone,” he starts off. “We are together, yes, you are right in that regard.”
“So you admit it?”
“However," he stretches out the word, signaling he's not done yet, "you are missing one important piece of information: we are in an open relationship.”
“Huh? Open… relationship?”
Jyuto explains, and by the end of it Jiro is reeling. “So you and Sensei are primary partners,” he says slowly, processing all the new information, “and Samatoki and soldier dude are your secondary partners?”
“I have more, but that’s right. The attention invested in each partner varies in non-monogamous relationships, but that is how it goes for the most part.” He frowns. “And for goodness sake, his name is Riou. You only get to call him Busujima-san though.”
“Fine, fine. So I guess you’re no cheater after all, huh...”
Jyuto rolls his eyes, not deigning that with an answer. Frankly he understands where Jiro is coming from; it’s an unsavory conclusion to make, but an accurate one with the information on hand, with just a few key details missing. Jiro is smart. Smarter than anyone gives him credit for, and Jyuto realizes he has been underestimating him this whole time. The kid’s got a real good eye for detail.
That’s my boy. The thought crops up like a bubble in Jyuto’s mind, expanding to fill his head with pride, filling the sharp and shrewd corners with fluffy warm cotton. He lets out a soft smile, following it up with light laughter.
“Hey, what’s so funny?” Jiro demands. “You laughin’ at me?”
“Pffft, no, no, I’ve just realized something.” He snickers. “It just seems you’ve put a lot of thought into the multitude of relationships I maintain and not a single one into yours.”
“Haw? What do you mean ‘my relationship?’”
“Ah, right, of course. Why call it a relationship when all you’ve done so far is pine for young Jyushi-kun and made nary a move to ask him out?”
“Anh-- wha-- h-how do you know--!”
“Your pining was very loud. It was hard to miss. Especially with that dazed look you had when you practically buried your face into his hair.”
“F-fuck you! It’s not my fault your car can’t fit six people so we had to squeeze together! A-and his hair is awesome, I told him so myself. So there! I can flirt.”
“Good grief, if you call that flirting… Child, allow me to impart some wisdom: one of the most romantic things a young man like you can offer is a ride in his vehicle. It is a veritable highway to the soul, if you will, a window into the mind’s eye. Since the car is an extension of one’s self, it has the potential for many a heart-to-heart with your lover.”
Jiro drops a fry on his shirt. He looks absolutely crushed. "So you're saying it's not video games?"
"...No, Jiro-kun. It's not video games."
Yeah, they’ve got a long ways to go. But Jyuto doesn’t mind -- they’ve got many milestones to reach.