Archive of Our Own

Dreary. That's the only way Mark Lee could describe this godforsaken boarding school. He'd just exited the grand hall, pretty much ignoring the incessant droning of the Dean about how this place only created the highest levels of success- "71% of our students went on to Ivy Leagues!"- and he was already over it. He had heard this shit already.

But he would hold his head high and strive for success. Because that's what his parents wanted.

His father had shaken his hand firmly before leaving school grounds, reminding him to only use his phone to call them when absolutely necessary. Other than that, stay focused at all costs.

This school, well... It was like all boarding schools. No electronics until the weekend, curfews, scheduled study time. An essay's worth of strict rules. And never, EVER, embarrass the school’s honorable name.

Messenger bag slung over his shoulder, he walked confidently towards the dorms, smiling brightly (albeit a little fakely), and returning waves with enthusiasm. Most of these kids already knew him, as it was their sophomore year at this hellhole. There was Lee Donghyuck standing in his doorway (right across his room, unsurprisingly), a cocky smirk on his face as always, with Na Jaemin peaking over his shoulder, indifferent to everyone running past him. However, he broke out into the cheesiest, most delighted grin when he saw Mark.

“Mark Lee,” Donghyuck drawled before Jaemin got the chance to greet him, self-confidence practically oozing from every single pore on his body. “What a pleasant surprise seeing you here.” He knew better than to trust that tone, he knew Donghyuck was actually happy to see him. He and his group had met at the beginning of their freshman year and hadn’t separated since. They always gathered for their study group, lucky to have Jaemin who was mind-blowingly intelligent, especially in Latin and physics, usually schooling the rest of them better than some professors did.

There was Huang Renjun in the room next to his, watching all the ruckus silently, as he always did. Renjun wasn't necessarily soft-spoken but he'd wait until something needed to be said, which usually gave people the idea that he hated everyone. But he was a sweet kid with a genuine heart.

Renjun’s roommate was Wong Yukhei and he was an absolute delight. Tall, handsome, most charming smile in the world. Always the one to brighten up serious moments, keeping everyone laughing and he was wicked smart. If you ever needed help with a world history class, he was the man to go to. Absolutely everybody loved him, he was the kind of free you always wish you could be.

Mark waved to them before pressing his fingertips to his own door, pushing forward gently, before stopping in his tracks when it swung open.

He almost forgot he had a new roommate with him this year. Last year, he'd gotten paired with Moon Taeil, who graduated that summer. He missed him a lot.

This kid looked disheveled, like he almost didn't know exactly where he was. Black journal still clutched in his hand, he looked up at Mark with wide eyes, resembling a puppy’s, lips parted in curiosity. Or maybe it was surprise. He didn’t know.

Mark gave him a warm smile, setting his bag down on his bed, his other bags were already there from when he'd dropped them off about a week ago. "Lee Jeno, right?" He greeted casually, noting the small details.

He smelled like cinnamon. He was taller than him with pitch-black hair that slightly hung in his face. Jeno nodded quickly, mumbling a quick "yes" before returning to unpacking his luggage.

Mark snorted softly, letting the silence settle in; yes, it was tense. "So are we going to go the entire two semesters before you actually talk to me? I don't bite."

"Yeah, he definitely doesn't bite." Mark and Jeno's heads snapped up at the exact same time as Donghyuck spoke, arm resting on the doorway with that infuriating smirk of his, mock drowning his tone.

Mark rolled his eyes, “Don’t terrorize him, Hyuckie,” he shot his way, throwing a spare jacket at his best friend. He was unbearably insufferable, a little egotistical, a little raunchy, but he did love him greatly. Donghyuck had seen him at his worst, seen him get into bad arguments with his parents- had even stepped in a few times to diffuse the situation. They’d gotten close during high school, actually. They’d both gone to the same private school and had joined up during their shared three classes. Since then, they’d been joined at the hip, even throwing a senior graduation party together. Mark didn’t know what he’d do without him.

Donghyuck quirked an eyebrow, meeting his gaze momentarily before there were people pushing past him into the room. Ah. Renjun, Jaemin, and Yukhei. It wasn’t a big room by any means, but they made sure everyone was comfortable, Renjun practically glued to Yukhei’s side.

“This your new roommate, Lee?” Donghyuck piped up, unceremoniously plopping onto Mark’s bed.

“Obviously, Donghyuck,” he rolled his eyes, sarcasm making its rare appearance, shooting a playful glare at his best friend.

Jeno didn’t say anything, just shot them all a shy smile and Mark quickly rushed to his aide, “Don’t let them scare you, Jeno. They’re all harmless idiots.”

Jaemin made an offended noise from behind him. Mark snorted, “Except Jaemin. But especially Yukhei and Donghyuck,” his eyes shining with playfulness and mirth, he cut over whatever the two were about to say and pointed to each of them in turn, “Huang Renjun, he’s your man when it comes to science. Yes, he has a resting bitch face, but he’s a sweet kid. Wong Yukhei, don’t let him fool you, he’s wicked smart when it comes to history. Na Jaemin, pretty much your all-rounder,” Jaemin smiled warmly at that, “and last but not fucking least…”

Donghyuck was already ahead of him, leaning forward to peer at Mark's new roommate, not offering to shake his hand, “Lee Donghyuck. Ace. Philanthrope. The man of the hour, the man of the week, the man of the year. Nice to meet you,” there was a certain kind of coldness lying behind his eyes, something Mark knew all too well. Regardless of Donghyuck’s easygoingness, he was insanely protective of his friends, especially Mark.

Jeno shook hands with the friend group, smiling amicably at everyone in turn. There was some kind of a wall, from what Mark could see. He could already tell he was passive and kept to himself. No matter, he wouldn’t push him.

“You forgot to add royal pain in the ass and thorn in my side,” Mark snorted, ducking his head instantly as Donghyuck tossed the pillow on Mark’s bed at him.

“So, convene here after dinner, if we can sneak past the head boys?” Yukhei spoke up, ignoring the irritating best friends, sitting rather close to Renjun. “It shouldn’t be that hard, they’re kind of…” Mark snickered along with Donghyuck, nodding. The head boys were seniors that thought they were kings of the world just because they had power over the underclassmen. Jeong Jaehyun and Johnny Suh… idiots, the lot of them, Mark thought to himself. They were cool before they were given the positions.

Mark Lee smirked at Yukhei, a twinkle in his eyes, “Absolutely. Why would we break tradition?” Nothing special. Just them gathering in one of their dorms to talk after hours. They'd discovered they could sneak around pretty easily after the first month of their first year at the school. Renjun and Hyuck had gone exploring one night when they couldn't sleep and found a plethora of quiet stairwells that couldn't quite be seen by the normal eye.

“Right, we’ll be back around later,” Hyuck unglued himself from the doorway, slipping out, but not before shooting one last glance at the new kid.

“It really is nice seeing you again, Mark. Missed you and the gang over the summer,” Jaemin smiled warmly at him, giving him a quick hug before they all filed out, leaving the room peaceful once again.

Mark couldn’t stop grinning as he started to unpack, happiness radiating off of him.

Jeno watched him quietly before resuming pulling clothes from his bag, trying his best to keep them folded nicely.

Mark inhaled deeply, watching all the Freshmen cross the expansive yard, presumably to go do nerd things. He could still vividly remember his first year. His mother had fixed his collar for him, patting his back, and sent him into the lobby by himself, reminding him to do his best and to keep his nose out of trouble. Of course, that was always nearly impossible when you’re best friends with Lee Donghyuck. That wasn’t to say they only cared about causing problems; both of them had still ended their year with top grades.

It was about ten minutes before Mark spoke, "You're welcome to join us, by the way,"

Jeno looked up from his phone, eyes wide and confusion written all over his features, "For…..?"

Mark rolled his eyes, shaking his head, “For our 'group study' later. If you don't wanna, you don't have to, of course, but," he shrugged, watching his facial reactions carefully, "I know you're probably still trying to get used to the new school, but," his tone had taken on something more gentle. He knew what it was like walking in here for the first time. Such a prestigious school with stricter rules than one could imagine. He didn't know anything personal about Jeno yet but he felt for him.

Jeno stilled for a second before nodding hesitantly, "Yeah. I think I'd like that a lot, thanks, Mark."

Mark smiled sweetly at him before grabbing his blazer from the coat hanger on their door. "Are you ready for your first class?" he wiggled his eyebrows at him, bag slung back over his shoulder.

His roommate's eyes widened in surprise, "It's not for another ten minutes, why are you in such a rush?"

Mark shrugged again, "Gonna go wander around, see if there are any alums here to visit us. And it does take a bit to cross the yard.... come on, I’ll walk you to your first class. Who do you have first?"

Jeno pulled out what looked like a well-worn schedule. “...Qian’s.”

It was a miracle Mark didn’t accidentally snap his neck from how fast he turned to look at him. “Excuse me?”

Jeno lifted his shoulders sheepishly, looking embarrassed. “...yeah. They moved me into an upperclassmen class for English. I don’t know why, but…” The kid was humble, it was cute.

Mark just shook his head, grinning at him, “come on, nerd.”

Jeno hesitated, almost taken aback, but he grabbed his journal nonetheless, slinging his backpack over his shoulders and followed him out the door.

The gang fell in behind them as they were crossing to the classrooms, enjoying the brisk morning chill on their bare faces. Yukhei and Jaemin were of course chattering away about their warm summers and how much they missed vacationing. Mark was quietly jealous. All he did all summer was go to stupid conferences and business meetings with his father, filled with blank smiles and fake politeness.

Qian Kun was sitting on the edge of his desk when the students filed into the classroom, blonde hair styled back, black suit crisp, like it was fresh from the dry cleaners. He was a new professor this year, taking over from the last Language Arts teacher, who was an old, grouchy man who never let them study anything actually interesting. Mark was glad he was gone.

Their teacher waited patiently for everyone to be seated and quiet down, hands folded in his lap. "You're probably wondering if this year is going to be just as dreary as your last, aren't you?" he spoke after a few moments, catching everyone off guard. Mark's head snapped up from pulling his notebook and textbook from his bag, blinking slowly. Every single teacher he'd ever had always greeted them gruffly with "read the introduction quietly, then we'll discuss. No messing around."

Qian Kun smiled at the classroom, reaching behind him to grab the textbook they were all required to read.

Donghyuck was the first to break the silence, his well-known bored and cannot be fucked expression on his face, tapping his fingers rhythmically on his desk, asking, "Is this your play to try to get us to like you?” God, Donghyuck was insolent. Mark turned and shot him a look, ready to chew him out once the period was over. His best friend was a little jaded.

Their professor didn’t even look fazed, a gentle smile still on his face. “Lee Donghyuck, right?”

He blinked blankly at him, surprised. Mark snorted quietly, it was a rare day when his best friend didn’t have a quick, catty comeback. Qian Kun continued naturally, as if brushing off the fact that his students were wary of him, “I’m sure you boys are used to the same, boring, old routine of reading the same, boring, old textbooks.” Everyone stared at him in silence, unsure of how to respond. He was right, but where was he going with it?

Qian Kun smiled at the students before ripping the first page of the textbook out, watching them with the calmest expression. Everyone gasped, Mark himself frozen in his seat.

“Sir-” Jaemin started from the front of the class, eyes rounder than tea plates. “I don’t think-?”

The instructor’s eyebrows raised as he tore out another one. And another. And another. From the looks of it, he tore out every single page of the introduction. “There’s no point in drilling old, boring literature dating back to god knows when,” he set the damaged book down on the desk. I think it’s time that they start teaching things more worthwhile. Poetry, great mythology tales...and the like.”

Everyone stared at him. He was a little...strange, but it was a nice change from the usual.

“For today, we’ll be going over some poetry, just the introduction,” he continued, passing out thin books to the class, pointedly ignoring the eye roll from Donghyuck.

The rest of the class period passed by smoothly. Mark had never been interested in such things, but he found himself becoming slightly invested. On their way out, his eyes fell on an old photograph propped up on the teacher’s desk. He probably should have minded his own business but he couldn’t help but look. There Qian Kun was, back to the camera, leather jacket wrapped around him. What looked like “Romantics” in cursive printed on the material. His hair was styled back, piercings dangling from his ears. He was surrounded by a few other boys, all with matching jackets, arms wrapped around each other's shoulders.

“Mark, hurry up. We don’t have all day.” Donghyuck’s voice broke through Mark’s haze of curiosity and he hurried after him.

The day passed by without any incidents. Jeno and Mark were joined by the rest of the gang at lunch. It took Jeno a little bit to get used to the way Mark’s friend group worked, but they welcomed him with open arms almost instantly. They were all nosy little shits; “where was Jeno from? Did he have any siblings? Was this his dream school?” Jeno answered all of them with shy hesitation.

Currently, they were occupying the lounge, Donghyuck scaring off anyone that dared to wander in. Their first week of school was done with and everyone was already tired. Renjun was curled up in one of the armchairs, knees tucked in politely. Jaemin and Yukhei were excitedly discussing what had happened over the summer break. Mark had his legs propped up on a footrest as he flipped through all of the school syllabuses with boredom causing him to sigh deeply. He could be less interested.

Jeno was sitting in the windowsill, seemingly admiring the moon hanging in the night sky. He’d taken his glasses off for the night- Mark couldn’t help but admire the way his face was sculpted like some Greek god. He was only pulled away from staring at him when Donghyuck nudged his knee with him, glasses sliding down his nose, hair falling in his face from a long day of being styled up. “How’re you feeling?” he asked quietly.

Mark put down the papers he hadn’t really bothered to read. “About what?” he replied. But he knew exactly what he was talking about.

Donghyuck looked at him with concern- a rare appearance, considering Donghyuck liked to portray himself as the “I don’t give a fuck” type. “Being back. I know you need the time away from your parents.” He certainly didn’t beat around the bush. His family was a touchy subject. His father didn’t necessarily support his dream of becoming a composer.

Mark chuckled, but it sounded empty even to his own ears. “Yeah, it’s nice...When I came here to drop off my other bags, I saw that Taeil had left his old guitar in the closet with a note for me on it. I sat there in shock for a good ten minutes.”

Hyuck smiled sweetly. “He’d mentioned he wanted to at the end of last year before he left. He knows how much you love playing,”

“You’re right… Maybe I’ll find time to write something later this year, who knows…” in fact, his fingers ached to strum the taut strings, or write some sheet music, anything that would let him express himself.

Donghyuck understood. He always did, even when they didn’t see eye to eye. “I’m excited to hear it.”

Eventually, everyone was worn out from the whirlwind of the first day and quietly said good night to each other, Jaemin quickly hugging Mark before they left.

“How’d you like your first day?” Mark asked after they’d both gotten settled in, his hair wet from having just got out of the shower. “I’m sorry my friends were so nosy,” it was his turn to be a little shy. He hoped his friends hadn’t given Jeno the wrong impression.

He heard a quiet chuckle from the other side of the room, “no...no, it’s okay. I get it. I’m the new kid. They were all pretty nice to me so I can’t complain.” he paused for a moment. “I get the feeling that Donghyuck doesn’t like me, though.” His voice had gotten quieter with the statement.

Mark sighed deeply, processing his thoughts, “Donghyuck… doesn’t trust easily. It took him a while to warm up to Renjun and Jaemin, even my roommate last year...Don’t worry about him, he doesn’t hate you. It’ll just take a bit. I promise he’s a good friend,” he loved his best friend with everything in him, but he knew he was a piece of work.

Hesitantly, but with a teasing undertone, “you two seem pretty close. You speak highly of him,”

Mark rolled his eyes. If he had a dollar for every time someone said that… ”we’ve just been best friends for years. We’ve essentially been attached at the hip since high school. Anyway, how were your classes? We only have Qian’s together. Hopefully, they weren’t too dreary.”

Jeno looked up from the book he was reading and shrugged. “They were...interesting. Especially Qian’s class,” a shy smile was hinting at his lips.

Mark returned his smile, chuckling, “Yeah, you could say that...definitely more invigorating than any of the old grouches we’ve had in the past. I wasn’t expecting him to just rip up an old textbook like that…” it still didn’t seem real.

“Did you notice that old photograph of him? He was wearing some sort of leather jacket with something on it, but I couldn’t quite-”

“The romantics.” Mark wasn’t usually one to interrupt but it had stood out to him. “Yeah, I did… I wonder what that is.” he didn’t think about the mysterious Romantics too much, he was wiped. “Good night, Jeno. I hope you had a good first day,” he finished before he turned the light off, settling them into a calm darkness.

School days passed by, Mark finding himself more and more excited to go to his Language Arts class. Their professor introduced them to the most wonderful literature, foreign and otherwise. From ancient tales of greek gods striking down monstrous titans to pining poetry, written about a lover that had disappeared. There was never a boring day.

Mark was coming back from checking out a book in the library- Dante’s Inferno, their professor had mentioned it recently- and tiredly pushed the door open before stopping in his tracks. His roommate was in the middle of pulling on what looked like a cozy sweatshirt, already dressed in sweatpants since they’d already had dinner and didn’t need to go anywhere.

Jeno hastily pulled his sweatshirt down, eyes wide with panic. However, Mark had already seen the pink scars on his chest. He didn’t quite understand, but he did know that Jeno was mortified so he sat down on his bed, looking up at him with kind eyes and murmuring, “It’s okay, Jen. We don’t have to talk about it, ever. If you’re never ready, that’s okay. I don’t expect you to trust me right off the bat, and if you never do, that’s okay, too. I know what a fucking nightmare life can be but...I’m here.”

He wanted to approach him. Physical touch was often what he craved when he was scared, but he didn’t want to push that on Jeno, unsure of exactly how he was feeling.

Jeno, paler than Mark had seen him, stared him down before grabbing his bag off the floor, slinging it onto his shoulder. "I have to go drop something off for Wu, but I'll be right back, yeah?" His voice was tight, but there was something unreadable shining in his eyes that Mark couldn’t quite figure out before he was turning on his heel, exiting their room while leaving the scent of warm cinnamon in his wake.

Mark flopped back on his bed, narrowly avoiding hitting his head on the wall. He couldn't stop thinking about the look on Jeno's face. No, they weren't close or anything and of course, he wasn't required to tell him anything, but he hoped Jeno felt comfortable with him.

It was almost an hour before Jeno quietly came back into their dorm room, face the slightest shade of pink. “I want to tell you if you’ll listen,” Jeno sighed.

So he listened. That was the right thing to do, so Mark sat cross-legged in his sweatpants on his bed. He was raised better than that. His hands were folded in his lap, eyes not leaving his roommate as he spoke.

“Don’t worry, it’s not some tragic story,” he chuckled, a bitter undertone in his words betraying what he said. Mark wouldn’t pry, it wasn’t his business. "My parents quickly okayed the surgery because they knew I wasn't happy. I suppose I got lucky. I guess I’m just not keen on every snooty, rich boy at this school knowing about it, considering most of them are ignorant. I’ve been on testosterone since I turned eighteen.”

Mark nodded in understanding- there were plenty of things he didn’t want his peers knowing; or even his parents, for that matter. “You can trust me,” he mumbled, “I’m not going to go around blabbering this to anyone. I may be a fucking idiot sometimes, but I promise this is safe with me.”

“Not even Donghyuck?” Jeno snorted derisively, and Mark shook his head fervently.

“Not even Donghyuck.” Mark was a lot of things; stubborn to the point of weakness, emotional, and a little naive, but he was one hell of a secret keeper. He'd take it to the grave if Jeno asked him to.

Jeno’s clever eyes appraised him for a moment or two before he broke into a small smile. “You’re a good kid, Mark Lee. I’m glad you’re my roommate.”

Mark chuckled, hoping his face didn’t flare up too much before he could get out the room. “I’m glad you think so, Jen. I’ve got you under my wing,” he replied easily, smiling warmly and eyes filled with affection. “Wanna go on my run with me? We don’t have to meet with the gang until way later.” he wriggled his eyebrows at Jeno like it was a challenge.

Jeno stared at him for a long minute, before grabbing his running shoes from his side of the closet, “If that’s a challenge, I’ll gladly accept. And I’ll kick your ass, too,”

Mark gasped in fake surprise, putting his hand over his chest, “Lee Jeno? Swearing? In THESE prestigious halls? Well, I’ll be.”

Since that night, it seemed like Jeno was a lot more...openly comfortable with him, and it warmed his heart to know that. Almost every other night, the group of friends would either crowd into Mark’s room, speaking in hushed voices, or spread out in the lounge. Mark wouldn’t trade this for anything. Even when he lost hours of sleep just to stay up and talk about life, or when they’d have to run from teachers that were sneaking in the hallways trying to catch kids out of bed- usually freshmen.

Mr. Qian squatted in the middle of all the students crowding in around him, their ears perked up as they waited with bated breath for whatever their wonderfully intelligent professor was about to tell them. Mark Lee sat on his desk nearby, feet crossed at the ankles. If any of the other staff were to walk in right now, they’d bust one too many veins from how improper they were being.

Textbook long forgotten about, Qian Kun spoke profoundly, a warm look in his eyes, “We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love... these are what we stay alive for.”

Mark’s lips parted in wonder. Nobody said a single thing, they all just looked on in awe. Out of the corner of Mark’s eye, he noticed the look of ‘i’m not impressed’ on Donghyuck’s face.

Mark was in the library a lot more after that, pulling poetry book after poetry book from the shelves, always getting weird looks from the ancient librarian. It was a blessing in disguise that you could check out multiple books at a time. Their language arts teacher continued to teach them about the great poets, from modern to some dating all the way back in the medieval days. He was also a little nosy- he searched out old school photos, trying to figure out what the Romantics could have been. Until he stumbled upon a yearbook, dating ten years prior.

His fingers glossed over the page dedicated to them. The romantics. Qian Kun at the forefront. They’d been a poetry club, full of misfits and people that didn’t quite fit in with anyone but each other.

His friend group was struggling. They were getting more and more bogged down from the piles of homework given to them each day, reminded that they needed to get the best grades, reminded them that there were a lot of things at stake if they didn’t. They still got together sometimes to hang out, but not as much. Everybody was just too tired. Until Mark had an idea.

Mark knocked quietly on Professor Qian’s office door, turning the knob when he heard the quiet “come in.”

“Ah, Minhyung. Interesting to see you here when it’s focused study time,” the instructor closed the book he was perusing- Keats, from the look of it, evidently trying to hide the smile pushing its way onto his face.

Mark went red, whether from the fact that he was getting called out or from the use of his full name. He knew he wasn’t actually being chastised but the good student in him felt guilty anyway. “I know, but I’m all caught up on everything I need for the upcoming tests, and-”

Qian Kun held up his hand, effectively silencing him. He was far too good at reading people. “Breathe, you’re okay, I promise. What’s on your mind?” he leaned back in his chair, one leg crossed over the other with his hands folded in his lap.

Mark bit his lip. He'd been thinking about this ever since that lesson.

"Mr. Qian, how would you feel if I revived the Romantics?"

His teacher's eyes widened in response, surprise written all over his face. "What?"

Mark cleared his throat and pushed on, "Your speech the other day, Mr. Qian, it made me want to bring it back to life. I think we all need something to cling on to. So with that being said… will you lead us?"

Qian Kun stared him down for a brief second before the warmest smile graced his lips, eyes crinkling into crescent moons. "I'm glad I could inspire you. However, you don't need me to lead you. You're a good kid, Mark Lee. You've got this."

When Mark brought up reviving the Romantics during their downtime, everyone just stared at him before Donghyuck snorted, “That’s been dead for so long, Mark. What’s with the sudden interest in poetry anyway?” He was in the middle of lighting a very against the rules cigarette, swiftly putting the match out and taking a heavy drag. Jaemin's nose scrunched in disgust, but he didn't say anything. It'd been a long week for everyone.

“Mind your business, Lee. I just think it would make this horrifying experience slightly easier. Everyone needs something to occupy themselves that isn’t mind-numbing academics,” Mark retorted, a little too quickly, tone a little too hostile.

Donghyuck’s eyebrows shot up in surprise as he exhaled smoke through his nose- Mark recoiled, shuddering at the ghostly pain in his nostrils. “Yeah? I don’t think what I said warranted that kind of reaction, Minhyung. You will watch your mouth when you speak to me.” he replied coldly. The room went deathly quiet, everyone's eyes wide with fear and shock. Donghyuck knew Mark’s full name was off-limits to everyone except for his parents.

Before Mark could fire back, blood boiling in his veins, Renjun piped up, surprising everyone. "I think it's a wonderful idea, Mark,” his eyes were warm for a singular second before he turned on Donghyuck, who was in the process of smoking his cigarette right down to the filter, "There was no need for that, and you know it. You can join, or not join, nobody's forcing you." His voice was gentle then, speaking softly, "He was just inviting you, Hyuckie. Making you feel included."

Donghyuck’s eyes met Mark’s after staring a bit longingly at Renjun, the fire inside him dying down to ashes nearly immediately. “I’m sorry, Mark,” he mumbled. “I didn’t mean to get all rude.”

Mark knew his apology was sincere and he nodded, relishing in the cool breeze gently wafting in through their window. Jeno was absent- he’d stopped by their room to drop off his schoolbag, telling Mark he was going to be in the library but that he’d be back soon. Mark didn’t even realize he’d started to stare off into space, too occupied with thinking about his roommate. Jaemin snapped his fingers in front of Mark's eyes, pulling him from the thoughts that were sucking him down, "So, tell us about this idea you've had, Markie."

Mark, snatching the cigarette from Donghyuck's fingertips, took a long drag, pointedly ignoring the glare his best friend was giving him. "I've been thinking about what Mr. Qian was teaching us about. Life is dreary as it is, why not enjoy it? Why focus on only the things our parents want us to? We need something to keep us going."

Jaemin's eyebrows shot up. Everyone was listening raptly.

"So with that being said, boys….why don't we revive the poetry club? Except since we're the new wave, we can call ourselves the Neo Romantics."

Renjun was nodding furiously, having stopped doodling in his extra notebook, eyes glued to Mark.

Yukhei just smiled. "Maybe I'm buying what you're selling. When would we convene? Would it be just us? The gang?"

The feeling of warmth courses through every single person crammed inside Mark's dorm. He had so much love and respect for them.

"Yes," he replied easily, then hesitated, flicking his eyes out the window, knowing if there weren’t trees in the way, he’d be looking directly at where the library was situated. "Although, I do wanna invite Jeno. He's always writing something, and I want him to feel like he has a place where he belongs."

Jaemin's eyes softened and he smiled sweetly, leaning forward to pat Mark's back, "You're a good kid, Mark Lee. Don't let the world ever take that away."

Mark’s face went tomato red. Everyone seemed to be telling him that lately, and he didn’t particularly understand why.

Every Saturday, they would sneak out into the courtyard, hustling to their preferred isolated spot- behind a massive weeping willow, notebooks tucked underneath their arms. Mark would bring the checked out library books, peacefully reading over the texts while the others would joke about sappy romance or ridiculously emotional prose. Sometimes Renjun would share the art he’d created from inspiration pulled from poems, sometimes Jaemin would go on some long-winded speech about life and its ups and downs. Jeno would often lay on his back and stare up at the clouds passing by, really only bothering to speak when they would discuss books.

Two months had passed since Mark had formed the new romantics. Jeno was busy and avoiding the dorms- probably in the library with their older classmate, Kim Doyoung. The two had been really close lately- and Mark was happy about that. Jeno was finally coming out of his shell, slowly but surely, and Doyoung was the perfect person to be around. Calm, collected, intellectual. Dry humor when needed. Jeno needed that.

And yet, Mark couldn't help but feel a small twinge of emotion in his gut every time he thought about the two spending so much time together. Not that he thought anything was going on, he just missed his roommate. Asking him about whatever he was writing in that carefully bound notebook of his with the pretty engravings on the cover and watching his cheeks go the lightest shade of red. Walking across campus to the cafeteria, thermos in hand with coffee already made and sugared- Jeno always looked at him with disgust when Mark drank his black coffee.

There were nights Mark stayed up reading books that Mark stayed up reading for hours, only using the flashlight he’d snuck in with him so he didn’t disturb his roommate. Unfortunately (for Jeno, that was), Mark got over-excited when he was reading out of one of the journals their professor had lent to him. "Jeno, Jeno, Jeno, wake up!" He whispered excitedly, sitting up.

"Mark, it's three am," Jeno grumbled, black hair disheveled across his sleep ridden face, immediately yanking the blanket over his head to block his eyes from the lamp Mark had just excitedly turned on.

“No, look, Jen, you gotta look at this message from the Romantics.” He knew he was being impolite, idiotic, all of the above, but he couldn’t tone it down. Something was just so very moving about the words scribbled on the old piece of paper.

“Read it to me,” his roommates’ voice was softened from underneath the big comforter lying on top of him, but Mark slid to the floor and leaned against his bed anyway, far too aware of his calming heartbeat.

Mark cleared his throat and softly recited, “There will be a day that you won’t feel like the world is bearing down on your shoulders. There will be a day when you won’t have to live in your own head, you’ll be able to speak whatever’s on your mind. There will be a day when you come to the realization that you are so loved. And at that moment, from that point on, you will be unstoppable."

Jeno snorted from beneath his blanket, poking his head out to stare at the back of Mark's head, "You sound like a really bad coming of age novel, Markie," it was a nickname Jeno had heard Donghyuck use at least fifty times, but it sounded pleasant on his teasing tongue.

Mark's face went tomato red when he realized their faces were far too close to each other's. "They aren't MY words, Jen," he spluttered, knowing his cheeks were heating up. He was never good at hiding his feelings.

Jeno's eyes crinkled as he let out a low laugh, mindful of the fact that voices carried easily in the dorms. "Calm down, I'm just teasing. Go back to bed. We have an early class in a few hours."

Mark nodded, trying to pretend like his face wasn't thoroughly on fire at that moment. "Uh-huh. Goodnight."

"Night, Mark," Jeno reached out to flick the lever on their lamp, bringing the room back to its previous darkness.

But Jeno didn't stop thinking about Mark's words. They went around and around like a cat and mouse chasing each other. They did indeed sound like a terrible young adult book, but they were words to live by.

“Wanna go hang out at the spot?” Mark asked casually after that night, shrugging off his blazer. Jeno looked up from his phone in surprise.

“I thought the others were bu-”

Mark smiled, “They are. But it can be just us two, you know?”

Pausing for a minute, he sat up for a minute, stretched, and nodded in agreement. “Yeah. I think I’d like that,” he answered kindly, a spark igniting in his eyes.

Jeno was leaning against the base of the tree, knees pulled up, notebook propped up on his thighs, sipping water from his metal straw. His hair was hanging cutely in his face. “Hey, Jen?” the words came tumbling out of Mark’s mouth before he could stop them, “Whatcha writing?”

Mark pretended he didn’t notice that his heartbeat picked up when he saw those pretty eyes. He pretended he didn’t hear his brain telling him that he wanted to know more and more about his roommate, he found himself wanting to ask him questions about his favorite things, childhood memories, what were his aspirations in life.

A teasing smile split his face, making Mark’s hands sweat slightly. He told himself it was just because of the nerves he’d been feeling from classes. “Nothing that you would be interested in,” he said playfully, but Mark noticed the way Jeno pulled his legs in a little tighter.

Mark lifted his broad shoulders in a shrug, replying easily with, “suit yourself,” before turning his gaze back to the poetry book he had propped in his lap, something their professor had recommended in class the other day.

Being with Jeno was easy. They didn’t feel the need to speak to each other, they could just enjoy each other’s companies in the peaceful silence.

The sun was starting to go down, and the campus was blessed with a lovely pink sky. Mark was ready to head back to the dorms, but Jeno had a different idea. He leaned his head against Mark’s shoulder, looking tired. “Do you ever wonder if it’s worth it?”

Mark was quiet for a few minutes as he contemplated his words carefully. “What do you mean, Jen?” he asked softly.

“All of...this. School. All of the struggling.” Ah. So the dark, exhausting, strenuous school life was getting to him. Mark couldn’t blame him, not one bit. He didn’t know what his home life was like, but he was sure he had people setting high expectations for him. He knew exactly what that was like.

“....I do. I’m no optimist, but I’d like to think it’s worth it.”

“Do you think Mr. Qian is right? That poetry and romance makes it all worth it.”

A kind smile lifted Mark’s lips, “I do. You’ll find your happiness someday, Jen. I’m sure of it,”

Jeno’s eyes looked slightly damp as he peeked up at Mark, cheeks faintly red from embarrassment. “I hope you’re right, Mark,” he mumbled before straightening up, collecting his stuff and putting it back into his bag.

Mark felt like he just got whiplash. First Jeno had been curled up against him, now they were getting ready to go back to their room. They were quietly walking the path back to the dorms, but the silence wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable. The sun had set even further, and the breeze was gentle.

They had more days like that. They would slink past the watchful eyes of the headboys, and sit quietly together, just reading and quietly enjoying each others company. Mark found himself not being able to imagine him and Jeno being separated, but he always told himself it was because they were such good friends.

One day, while they were getting ready to head out, Jeno asked a question that completely threw Mark off. “Would you...play your guitar for me?” he asked shyly, glancing towards the closet where Mark kept it hidden.

His face instantly went pink and he ducked his head, clearing his throat. “I mean...I mean, yeah, if you want me to.”

Jeno smiled triumphantly. Mark’s heart was throbbing in his throat.

On their way out of the dorms, Mark definitely got more than a few strange looks- he didn’t particularly talk about the fact that he was an aspiring musician, so he probably looked VERY out of place with an acoustic guitar strapped to his back.

Jeno had his journal tucked under his arm, as usual, ignoring all the stares, and just continued walking to their usual spot, plopping down in the grass.

Mark fiddled with the strings absentmindedly, looking at his roommate. “How’d you even know I had this?” he asked curiously, glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, sliding further and further down.

It was Jeno’s turn to blush. “I... heard you and Donghyuck talking about it in the common room.”

“...At the beginning of the year?” Mark was almost...touched that he still remembered that, but also was slightly embarrassed that they hadn’t been quiet enough.

"Uh-huh. And I'll bet you've been working on songs, am I right?"

Jeno was so observant. While it made Mark slightly anxious, it also made him smile to know that his roommate cared. "Uh...yeah. yeah, I have. Nothing too big but my old roommate and I used to jam together sometimes. This is actually his guitar." A warm smile spread across his face.

There was a song he’d heard at Donghyuck’s house one summer, an old, old Western song that always stuck with him. It was one of his favorite songs to sing, even though he was more into other kinds of music. Glancing down at his finger placements, he sang softly, “You with the sad eyes, don’t be discouraged. Oh, I realize, it’s hard to take courage in a world full of people; you can lose sight of it all and the darkness inside you can make you feel so small. But I see your true colors, shining through. I see your true colors, and that’s why I love you. So don’t be afraid to let them show. Your true colors, true colors are beautiful like a rainbow.”

Jeno watched him with quiet wonder in his eyes, almost looking a little emotional. But before Mark could ponder it, Jeno was laughing, a gentle, kind laugh. “Why are you at a school like this? You shouldn’t be cooped up in these halls when you could be playing for an audience.”

It was a rhetorical question. They both knew that. But Mark answered him answered anyway. Jeno had been nothing but honest with him since the beginning of the school year.

“Well...I tried to tell my parents about me wanting to become a musician and producer, but...well, they have other dreams for me,” a laugh left his lips, but it sounded very hollow.

Jeno just looked at him sadly and rubbed his arm, unknowingly sending butterflies shooting through Mark’s system. “I really hope you can get there someday, Mark. You deserve it.”

Mark could only offer him a weak smile, averting his eyes shyly as he slipped his guitar pick into his pocket. “Yeah. Maybe someday, he replied easily, leaning back against the tree, looking up at the sky. They stayed outside for hours after that until it was nearly midnight, just quietly chatting about whatever came to their minds. Jeno was easy to talk to, and he was grateful for that.

As they were walking back to finally crawl into bed, Jeno stopped him in their path. “Thank you for playing for me, Mark. I really enjoyed that.”

God, his roommate was sweet. Mark could feel his cheeks being shaded with a light blush. “It wasn’t any problem, Jen,” he sure fucking hoped his voice was steady. “Thanks for being my first real audience,” his tone, thankfully, was playful, and he shook his head, ready to just crash into bed.

Mark didn’t mean to find it. He didn’t mean to be a snoop.

Jeno was at the library one night, cramming for a test they had that Friday in Qian’s. Mark had just gotten back to their shared dorm after his last class of the day, shrugging his blazer off, eyes somehow not bagged from exhaustion- probably from sheer will. He was about to take a short nap before his gaze landed on something lying open on Jeno’s bed- the bound notebook he always had on his person. He must have forgotten it that morning.

Mark really shouldn’t have peeked. He should have minded his own business and taken a catnap. Instead, he perched himself on Jeno’s bed and gently flipped through the pages. Most of the scribbles were from outdated Romance poets from decades ago, but there were notes from Jeno himself as well. They spoke of passion. They spoke of someone with stars in their eyes. They spoke of someone that made everyone in the room feel welcomed, loved, comfortable in their own skin. They spoke of someone that Jeno cared for deeply and thought the absolute world of. Curiosity bloomed within his mind. Jeno didn’t strike him as the hopeless romantic type. Mark didn’t have much time to ponder who the poems could be about before the door was opening. And, oh, god, fuck, no.

It was Jeno. Slightly out of breath Jeno, looking like he just ran from the library to their dorm, black hair messily hanging in his face. He had a grin on his face before it fell like the sun in the sky once he realized what Mark had in his lap.

Hurt washed over Jeno. Hurt, confusion, and betrayal. He wasn’t one to get angry, but he wasn’t sure if he wanted to cry or yell in that instant. Maybe both.

Mark hung his head, voice barely audible as he mumbled, “I’m sorry, Jen,”

And he meant it. He’d promised himself to never invade anyone’s privacy, or disrespect their space.

Jeno’s eyes softened, a gentle tenderness filling his gaze. Suddenly all his walls came crashing down, and he couldn’t stop the words that next left him.

“You’re an idiot, Mark Lee,” he chuckled softly. Mark blinked at him in bewilderment, tilting his head to the side like a lost puppy.

“What?”

“That was about you, dummy.”

There was utter silence as they just stared at each other. Jeno’s chest started to rise and fall at a slightly concerning rate, and Mark’s mind was sprinting, trying to connect the words that had just left his mouth. There was no way.

Mark’s mouth opened. And it closed. And it opened. Like a fish out of water. Finally, he cleared his throat and muttered quietly, “I can’t believe you think that highly of me.” He really couldn’t think of anything else to say, the words on those pages still swimming through his mind

Jeno radiated shyness and he looked down at his feet, shifting restlessly. “Of course I do, Mark. You’ve been such a good friend to me since I came to this school and accepted all my weird little quirks.”

Mark smiled weakly at him, eyes crinkling. “I had no reason to be anything other than that. You’re a good person, Jen. You’re not like anyone at this school, or anyone I’ve ever met.”

Jeno’s eyes looked damp. “Stop talking, this was my moment to be open,” he teased, sniffling slightly, a grin on his face.

Mark immediately quieted down, watching him with wonder in his eyes.

“You’re so lovely, Mark. When you brought back that poetry club, you inspired me. I finally felt like I had a way to express myself. And I’m lucky. I would have never had that kind of courage.”

Mark didn’t think about what he did next. He just...did. Placing his hands on either side of Jeno’s face, he pressed his lips against his. He was terrible at expressing his emotions, but he hoped the way he felt was shown through the way he held him, kissed him.

Jeno tasted faintly like cinnamon and sugar mixed together. Mark didn’t think he could ever get over the way his lips felt against his.

He let himself enjoy the moment for a second longer before he pulled away slowly, watching his facial reactions carefully.

Neither of them said anything. Mark was starting to get nervous. “Jen…?”

“Shut up,” Jeno whispered before he was the one surging forward, kissing him fervently, desperately, like he had been...waiting for this moment. Before Mark knew it, he was flat on his back on Jeno’s bed, his hands on his roommate’s waist. They had to pull away eventually, but not before they were completely out of breath, chests heaving.

Mark pulled Jeno close, mind still reeling. In a short span of time, everything had clicked into place. He finally realized what he wanted.

“Be mine?” he mumbled against Jeno’s neck, finding that he was rather comfortable exactly where he was. Jeno’s back against his, arms wrapped around him.

“Never thought you’d ask, nerd,” he teased, turning his head to brush his lips against his.

Everything was so right for the two of them. Fools rushed in, but Mark and Jeno took their time, taking baby steps with each other.

Two weeks into their relationship, Mark had told his friends to meet up in his dorm room after dinner, pretending he didn’t notice the curious and skeptical looks he got.

Jeno threaded his fingers through Mark's hair affectionately before their door opened quietly and their friends filed in.

Once everyone was situated- Jaemin perched on the windowsill, Donghyuck sitting on Mark's bed with his back against the wall, Renjun leaning against Yukhei on the floor. They were cute, Mark had to admit. They were keeping their budding relationship quiet and out of the public eye for the moment.

"So?" Donghyuck finally spoke up, raising his eyebrows at the two. Mark took a deep breath and felt calm once he felt Jeno's hand on the small of his back. There was no reason for him to be nervous, he loved his friends and they were all joined at the hip with how close they were.

"Jeno and I are dating."

There was no reason to beat around the bush. Everyone except Donghyuck broke into wide smiles. Mark made eye contact with him, knowing he was happy for him, just had a hard time showing it. That, and he was protective of Mark.

"So, how'd it happen, lovebirds?" Jaemin cooed, crossing his feet.

Mark went about fifty shades of pink when Jeno spoke first, "He's a nosy brat and went snooping through my notebook,"

Yukhei's eyes went wide and he shook his head, "Mark, you know better!"

Mark smacked Jeno's thigh, face burning in embarrassment. "That is DEFINITELY not what happened," he spluttered, shaking his head vehemently.

"Then what happened?" Jeno teased.

Mark didn't think his face could get any more flushed. This was a direct attack on his pride. "...okay, that's kinda what happened, but I didn't mean to!"

Renjun looked at him with disapproval, intertwining his fingers with his boyfriends. "I'm definitely not surprised. You're way too curious for your own good," Mark knew he was absolutely correct, but that didn't mean he wanted to admit to it.

Donghyuck was quiet as he fiddled with the necklace he hid underneath their school mandated white button-down. Finally, he looked up, a soft smile on his tanned face, "Injun's right, Markie," he teased, mirth in his eyes, "But sometimes that's a good thing."

Jeno nodded, resting his hand reassuringly on Mark's thigh, "we started dating two weeks ago but we wanted to keep things quiet for now."

They stayed up until the early hours of the morning, talking in hushed voices- just in case it carried and there were unwanted ears. Eventually, everyone was worn out and they all agreed they would go back to their own rooms. Renjun and Donghyuck uncurled themselves, stretching out like cats, muffled yawns coming from everyone.

"Thank you for trusting us with this, you two," Jaemin murmured tiredly, standing up from his spot on the windowsill, rolling his head to work out the kink he probably had in his neck.

Mark's eyes crinkled with genuine love and affection from behind his circular glasses. "I wouldn't even dream of telling anybody but you guys first," Yukhei leaned forward over Jaemin's head to ruffle Mark's hair, causing him to scrunch his nose at him.

Donghyuck lingered as the other three quietly slipped out of their dorm, heading off to bed. He was quiet for a minute before he hugged Mark tightly, mumbling, "I'm so proud of you," before letting go of him and shooting a smile at Jeno, before following the other three. Mark was speechless, staring out the empty doorway. Donghyuck and him weren’t outwardly gentle with each other, so it completely threw him for a loop.

Jeno gently grabbed his hand and pulled him to bed. Pressing kisses to Mark’s neck, he told him softly once again that he was proud of him before going quiet, heart rate starting to relax. Mark pulled the blanket over the two of them, mind still reeling. Almost like they’d done it a million times, like it was habit, Jeno tangled his legs slightly with Mark’s, sighing contently.

“You’re a good kid, Mark Lee. I'm glad you're my boyfriend." Jeno whispered, brushing his lips against his roommates lovingly, stretching an arm out to turn the lamp off, plunging the room into semi-darkness.

And for once, Mark understood.