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There was a woman standing in front of Jess, a woman in an oversized t-shirt sporting a cat surfing a rainbow and high top sneakers that…….were those light up sneakers? Jess was also quite certain that the chances of the brunette wearing pants under the t-shirt were slim to none.
“Um…how can I help you?” Jess cautiously asked the other woman. If this was another assassination attempt on her boss, it would definitely be one of the more memorable ones.
“Is it the outfit? It’s the outfit,” the brunette added nodding with a sigh. “I was on my way here from Catco and I ran into a little spat between Supergirl and some hardcore goth chick, I mean she had full on skull make up and white hair. I think she’s in a screamo band. Anyway they upended a coffee cart right into me, I dodged but my Dior wasn’t as lucky. And the only store in the entire street was some hipster hell hole, so it was either this or a shark onesie and I hate sharks.”
“Okay…..that was a lot of information. How did you get onto this floor without an appointment Ms…?” Jess asked, attempting to regain some semblance of professional etiquette.
“Selina Kyle. Socialite, heiress, billionaire catnip and Catwoman between the times of 12am to 4am,” Selina winked at the assistant, before making herself comfortable on her desk.
“Do you have an appointment?” Jess asked with a raised eyebrow, unimpressed by the intrusion.
“No. Can I go in anyway?” Selina pouted slightly.
“Fine, just go,” Jess sighed, waving the other woman in.
“Seriously? That actually worked?” Selina asked with a wide eyed look of surprise.
“Of course it didn’t work. I just know that one way or another you’re going to get in there, so I might as well save time and my personal sanity by just letting it happen,” Jess said, packing up her things as she spoke. She was taking her lunch break at 10am dammit, she deserved it for having to deal with all these nut jobs.
“Thanks!” Selina called out to Jess as the assistant made her way to the elevator before turning and slinking into the office.
Selina glanced around the bland office as she made her way to the desk and the brunette crouched over a pile of papers by it.
“Aww, you are so adorable,” Selina cooed, coming closer to the CEO.
In one swift movement, Lena stood and trained a gun on Selina. “Who are you and where is Jess?” she asked coldly.
“Oh how rude of me. Your assistant either went out for lunch or quit, not really to sure. And I’m Selina Kyle but you can call me mommy?” Selina replied with a sunny grin.
“Ew……what? Why would I call you mommy?” Lena asked, confusion lighting her face as she slowly lowered the weapon.
“Well when two supervillians love each other, or at least lust each other, very much they get married in order to dodge taxes and double their resources in taking over the world. I married your mother is what I’m trying to say,” Selina finished, making her way to the sofa and patting it for Lena to join.
“You married Lillian? Why?” Lena asked, baffled by the turn of events.
“She’s tall, hot, broody and rich. She also bankrupted Norway for me,” Selina said, attempting to pet Lena as the younger CEO kept dodging her attempts.
“Why Norway?” Lena asked, smacking away the feline woman’s wondering hands.
“I mean I feel like there was definitely a good reason at the time but I just cant remember what it was. Anyway it’s irrelevant because mommy brought you gifts.” Selina said clapping her hands excitedly before making her way to the office entrance where a steel briefcase was lying unnoticed.
“I’m not calling you that!’ Lena snapped rolling her eyes.
“I understand that this is difficult, having a new parent is always an adjustment but I think with time we will reach the point where you can refer to me as mom,” Selina said gently rubbing the youngest Luthors arm.
“What? No, the problem is that you are literally the same age as me! It’s weird and I don’t even call Lillian mom,” Lena argued back while attempting to get out of Selina’s grasp.
“Whatever, look gifts!” Selina said as she popped open the suitcase to reveal an array of shiny gadgets. “So I heard you were a nerd, so I put together some of the villain gadgets I’ve stolen throughout the years for you.”
“This is Mr Freeze’s gun, the original,” Selina pointed to the iced over pistol. “That over there is a batarang, Barbara’s not Bruce’s.” Selina removed the metallic yellow tinted bat from the case.
“Now on this side we have Pamela’s poison, Jokers laughing gas and last but not least Bane’s angry steroids. I thought you’d like to maybe experiment with these but if you’d prefer I can always just buy you a pony,” Selina shrugged lightly before pushing the case towards the other woman.
“This is…..this is amazing. There is so much that can be learnt from these weapons,” Lena touched the contents of the case with reverence before looking at Selina with glazed over eyes. “This is the best gift ever!”
Lena launched herself at the other woman, toppling her over in a giant bear hug.
“There,there, my future little supervillian,” Selina placated as she smoothed Lena’s hair.
“Thank you…..mommy,” Lena said quietly into the others shoulder, not noticing the way Selina beamed at the words.
Both however missed the presence of Supergirl hovering just outside the balcony doors.
“Mommy? Oh Rao……….is that a sex thing?” Supergirl muttered to herself as she observed the scene with wide eyes. “I should ask Cat if she’s into that,” the blonde mumbled with a blush before making a quick escape before either woman noticed her.