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Long way home

Summary:

Is home a place, or a feeling? Maybe home is a person? Maybe home is only being who you are, and being at ease with it. In Linda and Becky's case, their home has always been right in front of them, and they still took half a lifetime to find it. This is bits and pieces of their journey.

 

I joined the songs Cardigan and Seven from Taylor Swift's Folklore, and this is the story that came out of it.

Notes:

tw for implied domestic violence (stanley), and divorcing parents on childhood.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Vintage tee, brand new phone

High heels on cobblestones

When you are young, they assume you know nothing

Sequined smile, black lipstick, sensual politics

When you are young, they assume you know nothing



Is home a place, or a feeling? Maybe it's a place that holds your feelings, or at least the most precious ones. Was it weird that Becky's home was a tree in a city square? She'd always find her way back there, wherever things got hard to bear. 

Was it weird that she was often there too? Maybe it was just chance. Some could say it was more than chance, but Becky didn't believe in fate. That time, though, it wasn't chance or fate, it was deliberate. Becky has called her, but she still wasn't sure if it was a good idea.

She was sitting in a bench underneath the tree, looking at her own feet, reminiscing. Then she heard the heels clicking on the cobblestones, and that very familiar voice filling the quiet night air. 

"Yes, Gerald, keep the car running…" she was on the phone, of course she was.

Becky looked up at her, not even realising the smile that appeared on her own face. Linda was so pretty. She was dressing fancy, a black and white cocktail dress and dark lipstick in contrast to her platinum hair. Certainly coming from some kind of socialite event that Becky didn't even regret taking her from. 

God, if she could just freeze the time on that frame, that single moment when their eyes met across the square and her thin lips curved in the slightest of smiles. For just a split second it was just like back then, when they knew each other.



But I knew you

Dancin' in your Levi's

Drunk under a streetlight, I

I knew you

Hand under my sweatshirt

Baby, kiss it better, I



A dancefloor apart, their eyes crossed at that high school party, and there was a spark. Was it desire already, or just anger at that point? Of course they were on one of those ongoing fights over something. What was it this time? A grade? A spot on some team? They were always competing over something, it was hard to keep track. And a party on the house of a classmate was just another battlefield for them. 

Oh, it was a boy this time. Linda kissed him, and her eyes were on Becky again as soon as she let go of him, a cruel smile on her lips. The redhead started drinking after that, but even then she couldn't keep so long in that party. 

She left on foot, home wasn't far away. She'd just set foot on the square when a car stopped by her side. A red convertible, packed with drunk teenagers, all coming from the party.

"Becky Barnes!" Her voice was heavy with disdain. When would Becky get used to that? Would it hurt her every time? "What are you doing here all alone?" She pouted in mockery, and some idiot in the car laughed.

"Going home." Even before she finished her answer, Linda hopped out of the car. 

"You pick me up on your way back." She said to the guy driving. Yes, it was the same guy they have been fighting for. She said something to convince him and they kissed again. Becky groaned and kept walking as the car went off, and she heard Linda's steps behind her.

"You're so pathetic. Were you really going home or to your tree to cry?" That was harsh, and Becky turned around to face her. The square was dark, but they stopped just under a streetlamp. The yellow light made Linda's hair look more golden.

"Wha' ya doing here? Didn't step on me 'nough for one night?" Her irish accent would come out every time she was drunk or angry. She was both. She stepped closer, trying to intimidate. Linda couldn't be intimidated, she stepped closer too. 

"No, actually." Their breaths met between them, two little smoke clouds that only happened in the peak of winter. But they weren't cold, they had too many drinks to be cold. They were too much into the heat of that moment.

"I hate y--" the rest of the sentence was muffled when their lips met. Where did that come from? When did the anger become desire? Has it always been? Was it just the alcohol? 

None of them were worried with answers in that moment. All they wanted was to kiss each other, harder, longer… Just a few steps until Becky was pressed against that same tree and her hand slid under Linda's sweater. Her skin was soft and warm, just like her lips, and Becky pulled her even closer. There were soft little moans muffled between their clashing mouths.

And then a car engine echoed from down the street and Linda pulled away. The moment was broken. She mumbled a "fuck!" and ran away before Becky could even react.

They have never kissed before, but Linda's actions didn't surprise her at all. Especially the fact that she ran away without saying a word. How many times did she run from Becky before? How many more would she still run? 



And when I felt like I was an old cardigan

Under someone's bed

You put me on and said I was your favorite



There she was, sitting on a branch of her tree, her feet dangling lazily, when a pink bike stopped just underneath it. 

"Aren't you too old to be up in a tree?" Linda's voice sounded cold, and Becky didn't look at her. Was twelve too old for anything?

"It's none of your business." She tried to sound just as cold. Not so easy.

"I heard about your grampa. My condolences." Was she saying that just for social protocol?

"Thanks" there was nothing else to say, and they stood in silence for a second. 

"I heard your mom got married, too." That finally made Becky look at her.

"People gossip too much on this town." She complained in a small voice.

"Is he… ok?" There it was, finally some emotion in Linda's voice. But was it concern or just curiosity?

"To her, yeah." Becky shrugged. "He doesn't care about me, though." Once again they fell in silence, and Becky looked at her own dangling feet. 

She saw, on the corner of her eye, Linda put her feet back on the pedals and she started leaving, but then she stopped again, just a second later.

"Hey. Fuck him if he doesn't care about you, don't forget there's people who do." Becky looked at her again and she held her stare. 

"Do you?" Did she really ask that? 

Linda rolled her eyes and went away, refusing to answer. How did they grow so much appart? How could someone who meant the word to you, become almost a stranger? Growing up was so weird...

And even them being little more than strangers now, Linda still was able to soothe her. It wasn't much, but that small conversation made her feel a little better about herself. Linda still had that effect on her. So much has already changed since their childhood, and there was so much more that was yet to change, but some things, the deeper ones, those stayed. Becky touched the letters carved on the tree trunk. Those would stay. 



A friend to all is a friend to none

Chase two girls, lose the one

When you are young, they assume you know nothing



Linda was jealous. She didn't exactly understand why she felt that way. Becky's always had other friends, she's always been more popular than her. All the kids wanted to play with the lively wild Irish girl. So why did Melissa bother her so much?  

But on some levels, Linda knew why. Friends were fine, but some things were beyond friendship. Some things were theirs . There were secrets they shared, there were things that only existed on blanket tents and on top of trees. Comparing the size of their hands and lock their fingers together. Playing with each other's hair. Their innocent love. It was theirs, no one else's. 

That's why she felt so betrayed when Becky decided to go on a sleepover on Melissa's. Sleepovers were theirs. And then, she saw them walking with their pinky fingers linked. That was theirs, too. People thought Linda didn't know anything because she was just nine years old. But she would be ten soon, and she knew some things. 

She knew her friendship with Becky was special. She didn't want anyone to take her place. But she also knew she couldn't fight for that. She knew what people would say, if they knew she was jealous. She knew Becky would think less of her. So she stepped away, bit by bit. She let it wither and hoped it died, but it just became bitter inside her.



But I knew you

Playing hide-and-seek and

Giving me your weekends, I

I knew you

Your heartbeat on the High Line

Once in twenty lifetimes, I



On top of a tree in High Line square. That's been Becky's favorite place since… since things started to change. 

"Come down from that tree, Becky Barnes!" mom would always scream with her high pitched irish accent, from their front window. The blessing and curse of living just across the street from the square. Dad would try to bribe her away from the tree with supper and apple pies. 

But she never wanted to come down. There, she was on top of the world. From there, she couldn't hear them fighting. And then Linda would climb there, and they'd play together. Becky held her hand to help her get to the taller branches. She was the only one Becky would share the top of the tree with.

She'd come down from the tree for Linda. So they could play hide-and-seek and ride bikes and run around the square. So Linda's mom could drive them to fun places, like the zoo or the amusement park, where they'd share a big pink cotton candy and sweet popcorn, and sweet sweet laughs. With Linda, she didn't worry about her parents' fights, because they were always playing, traveling to some fantasy world and having adventures together. And wherever they were, as long as she was with Linda, she was on top of the world. 



Please picture me in the trees

I hit my peak at seven

Feet in the swing over the creek

I was too scared to jump in

But I, I was high in the sky

With Pennsylvania under me

Are there still beautiful things?



She was sitting on a bench, seeing her boys play on the same swings she used to play at their age. Two beautiful golden boys at their peak: seven. She had another sleeping on her arms and the fourth was just a tiny seed inside her. Her most beautiful mistakes. 

And even after all of them, after all those years, she was on that park reminiscing about that woman. The one she thought about every time she has let those boys' fathers take her. The girl she used to play with on those very same swings. 

She could still hear Becky screaming and laughing by her side. She'd look at her to see her fiery hair blown by the wind and her freckled face blushed with joy. Every time the swing reached its peak, it was like she was flying. Like she could let go of the rope and float like Peter Pan, because she only had happy thoughts. 

"LINDA, LET'S JUMP IN THE CREEK!" Becky would always say, yelling over the wind and the noise of the water running beneath them.

But Linda never jumped. She wanted to, but when she prepared to do it she'd get scared and scream, and hold the ropes tighter. 

She loved the high, but was afraid to fall. She's always been afraid to fall. Would her life have gone better if she wasn't so afraid? If she'd jumped in with Becky without hesitation? Would it have stayed beautiful and colorful and happy like it was in that time?



Sweet tea in the summer

Cross your heart, won't tell no other

And though I can't recall your face

I still got love for you

Your braids like a pattern

Love you to the Moon and to Saturn

Passed down like folk songs

The love lasts so long



They've built a blanket fort inside Linda's room. They were hidden and safe there, with ice tea and chocolate to last them through the night. 

But in their minds, they weren't in Linda's room at all, they were in a big adventure. They were natives in the far west, building their tent on the canyons to hide from the bandits. With red streaks painted on their cheeks, using a lantern and their fingers to make animal shadows on the tent wall. Telling the made up tales of their made up tribe. 

"Did you know Linda means pretty in portuguese?" Becky said, as she finished braiding her friend's long yellow hair. 

"Really?" Linda turned to look at her, and the ginger girl nodded. "And what does Rebecca mean?"

"I don't know, didn't look it up." She shrugged, and her friend pouted. 

"It must mean lazy!" She teased, and Becky gave a light slap in her arm. They shared a small laugh. "But in our tribe's language, it means prettier." she whispered like it was a secret, and smiled when she saw the girl's face get blushed.

"I'm not prettier than you." Her voice was a whisper too. 

"Yes, you are." Linda got closer and started running her hands through the ginger hair, it was her turn to braid it.

"I'm not!" the exchange of compliments became a back and forth banter, they had trouble to agree even about how much they liked each other.

"You are, 'cause your hair looks like fire." Linda said, enticed by the bright autumn orange on her fingers.

"And yours look like gold." Becky retorted, looking at her with the corner of her eye, a little smile on her face.

"But fire melts gold." Her voice was barely audible, it was the most hidden and precious secret she's ever told. Becky's smile widened, then turned into a giggle, and in a second  both were laughing. Was that how pure joy felt?

"We should join our hairs together in a braid!" Becky's crazy ideas always lead to fun moments, that one wasn't  different. 

They had many laughs trying and failing to mix the orange and yellow together before they managed to make a thick and messy braid that forced them to stay with their heads very close together. But this would be the last thing to bother them, it just made it easier to kiss each other's cheeks. 



And I've been meaning to tell you

I think your house is haunted

Your dad is always mad and that must be why

And I think you should come live with me

And we can be pirates

Then you won't have to cry

Or hide in the closet

And just like a folk song

Our love will be passed on



Linda knocked on the door, and a woman she knew opened it.

"Hi, love, she's upstairs in 'er room" she said with her thick accent, letting her in, and the little girl ran up the stairs, almost as if she was in her own house. It might as well be, she was there so often. But when she entered Becky's room, there was nobody there.

"Beck?" she called, looking around.

"Here" a small voice coming from the wardrobe. Linda opened its door and found her friend curled up inside it. Without a second thought, she got in as well, sitting by her side and closing the door the best she could from within. 

"What are you doing hidden here?" Only a thin ray of light got in by the crack between the doors, making the dust look like tiny fairies and letting Linda see Becky's eyes. They were still wet.

"They were fighting." It was such a small whisper, but it resounded on the small place.

In the dark, Linda's hand found hers and their fingers intertwined in a tight grip. Becky's  head leaned on her shoulder, and they just sat there in silence for many minutes. There was nothing to be said. Linda's eyes got used to the darkness eventually, not that she needed it. She's never been afraid of the dark. 

She got startled, though, when she heard a loud creak on the floor, and instinctively grabbed Becky's arm with her free hand. It was an old house, it always  creaked a lot, but she never got used to it. Becky let out a small laugh at her fright.

"Don't laugh at the ghost!" Linda whispered, still clinging to her friend's arm.

"It's just wood, Lin." she could hear the amusement in Becky's voice.

"No, I'm sure this place is haunted! All old houses are." she was half scared, half trying to cheer Becky up. 

"Not this one, mama got it protected by Saint Cataldus." the girl reassured, as if the saint meant something to Linda. 

"What about the ghosts that aren't irish, huh?" Becky laughed at that, but the blonde girl  nudged her arm. "I'm serious, Becky, I'm feeling the ghost, it's close!" 

"No you're not!" But just as she said it, the wood creaked again and both girls shrieked, holding each other. "Ok, let's get out of here."

"Yeah, let's go to my house, there's no ghosts there." There were no fighting parents too. 

They got out of the closet together, hand in hand. 



Please picture me in the weeds

Before I learned civility

I used to scream ferociously

Any time I wanted

I, I

Sweet tea in the summer

Cross my heart, won't tell no other

And though I can't recall your face

I still got love for you

Pack your dolls and a sweater

We'll move to India forever

Passed down like folk songs

Our love lasts so long

 

Running barefoot in the grass, screaming at the top of their lungs just for the fun of it. It was maybe the best thing about going to Becky's house. Linda's mom always had her tidy and neat and behaving like a little lady, and the blonde girl liked it a bit, but it could never compare to the freedom of being childish and wild like her best friend.

On that summer afternoon, the girls were in the Barnes' backyard, playing hero and bandit, running after each other. Linda was hiding in her imaginary villain secret quarter, when she saw through the kitchen window a knife sitting on the balcony, just within arms reach if she sneaked there. And of course she did.

"Becky, look! I'm a true villain now! The most dangerous assassin in the kingdom!" She yelled, brandishing the knife as if it were a sword.

"Oh my God, Linda! Careful!" Becky didn't dare to step closer, but she laughed hard as her friend kept on pretending she had a sword. "Is this sharp?" Her curiosity got her a step closer.

Linda stopped playing and touched the point of the blade with the top of her finger. "Ouch!" Becky ran to her side, worried. It was just a very small cut, but it did produce a drop of blood. 

"We shouldn't be playing with this." she didn't like to see her friend getting hurt, but Linda didn't want to let go of her new toy.

"It didn't hurt. You know what we should do?" Her brown eyes sparkled with an idea. "We should become blood sisters!"

"Like the movie we saw yesterday?" Becky's frown turned into a smile, and her face already flushed by running around turned even more red when Linda nodded. She handed Becky the knife, and the redhead hesitated for second, afraid of the pain. A sharp intake of breath, and there was a little red dot on her finger as well.

"Ready?" Linda whispered, and Becky nodded. They pressed their fingers together, mixing their blood.

"Now we're blood bound through life." Becky mimicked the movie's line as she remembered it, and Linda's smile widened. Their fingers intertwined and they touched the tips of their noses together on an eskimo kiss, like they used to do when they shared a special moment like this. 

"I know what else we can do!" Becky said, now her blueish green eyes were the ones sparkling with excitement. 

Without letting go of Linda's hand, she ran around the house. Still barefoot, they passed the picket fence and crossed the street, getting to the square. Becky held the handle of the knife between her teeth to climb the tree, and in no time they were side by side on one of the highest branches.

Sitting near the tree trunk, knife in hand, the little redhead started to carve out the wood. Linda rested her head on her friend's shoulder, curious eyes observing what she was doing. 

"Done. Now we'll be here forever, just like our blood bond." she said when it was ready, and they smiled at each other. 

"And this will always be our place, even when we grow up and go travel the world together." They linked their pinky fingers in a promise.

Their innocent promises were all broken eventually. Nothing lasts forever, except for dreams and fantasies that don't reach reality. Only the mark on the tree stayed, the letters B and L inside a crooked heart. And their marks on each other's broken hearts.



And when I felt like I was an old cardigan

Under someone's bed

You put me on and said I was your favorite



Becky was standing on the front porch light, her bike thrown carelessly at her feet. She knew warmth and comfort were just a door apart, but she was hesitant to knock. It was night already, what if she was bothering? Deep breaths, deep breaths . She stood on her tiptoes and rang the bell.

"I'll take it!" She heard a familiar children's voice from inside the door, and her heart already calmed a bit. 

Linda opened the door, and her first reaction to see her friend was a wide smile, but it quickly faded when she saw her face. Becky didn't bother trying to wipe the tears that ran through her face, there was no point in trying to hide her swollen eyes.

"Daddy left." She said in a sob, before Linda even had the chance to ask. 

A long silence echoed between them, Linda just looking at her clearly unsure what to say. Becky felt her chest crumbling again, the sinking feeling of being abandoned, but when her lips trembled and the tears welled up in her eyes, she felt Linda's arms around her. Comforting, protecting, caring. She let herself completely lean into that hug, physically and emotionally. And she let out the sobs and tears that were trapped inside her.

"Don't he love me anymore?" she whimpered, even though she knew her friend didn't have the answer for that. 

Linda just held her even tighter, and they stayed like that until a voice from inside reached their ears.

"Linda? Is everything alright?" the blonde girl immediately let go of the hug, but both her hands went to hold Becky's as she yelled a "yes, mom" in response.

"Stay. We love you in here." Linda always joked that Becky should live with her, but this time it wasn't a joke. And of course Becky wouldn't move there, but at least for the night she would stay. 



To kiss in cars and downtown bars

Was all we needed

You drew stars around my scars

But now I'm bleedin'



Once again, Becky felt abandoned. Tom has left her for the army, and she knew it wasn't her fault, the same way she knew it wasn't her fault that her father left when she was a child. But even knowing that, it was still hard to convince her feelings, it was hard not to wonder if it was something about her. 

It was in this weird time that Linda came back to her life in a very surprising way. After they kissed in high school, they never spoke again, even their rivalry died as they simply started avoiding each other. Until they saw each other in that bar, months after their graduation, and instead of ignoring her, Linda sat by her side. And they talked. 

They talked for hours, remembering their childhood together, telling their plans for the future, and even laughing about the silly things they competed about in freshman and sophomore years. Neither of them mentioned that kiss. But then Linda offered her a ride home, and when they were alone in the car, the subject of the kiss came about. And then another kiss happened, followed by many others. And instead of running away, Linda called her the next day. 

And for a few months it was a paradise. A hidden paradise, just theirs. In some ways, it was just like their childhood, sharing laughs and kisses and happiness. Living the moment without thinking about tomorrow. Until the day they talked about it. 

They were in bed, resting, Becky leaning on the pillows and Linda's back on her chest, their sweat mixed on their skins. A comfortable silence, both looking at their hands, measuring them together like they did when they were kids, Linda's hand still much smaller than Becky's. 

"We should come out…" Becky whispered, nuzzling her nose on that golden hair. She felt Linda stir against her. 

"I-- aren't you… scared?" Her voice was barely audible, and Becky knew she hated to show weakness. 

"No. We've done it before, remember? When you were afraid of ghosts, you took my hand and we got out of the closet together." She tried to lighten the mood, and it worked, because she heard Linda's laugh. That genuine laugh that was just for her.

"That was a literal closet, silly." 

"It's about time we do it metaphorically. I'll hold your hand." She intertwined her fingers, her other hand going around Linda's waist to hold her closer. The blonde fell silent for a second. Although she felt her relax in her arms, Becky feared she would close herself again, shut down her feelings like she used to do. "It doesn't have to be now if you don't want to. Whenever you feel comfortable." 

"I'll think about it." Linda whispered, not sounding very firm. 

Becky tried to feel hopeful, but she knew Linda since they were small. She's always been afraid to fall.



'Cause I knew you

Steppin' on the last train

Marked me like a bloodstain, I

I knew you

Tried to change the ending

Peter losing Wendy, I

I knew you

Leavin' like a father

Running like water, I

And when you are young, they assume you know nothing



Linda left to go to college at another city, and Becky wasn't even surprised. She knew her. She knew those months of happiness were bound to end in tears. She knew that, despite the tears, if the universe is infinite she was living in one of the best of realities, because at least those months existed. At least she had the chance to kiss her goodbye. To say I love you before Linda got in the ferry. Even without her saying it back.

Linda was bound to run, afraid of her feelings. Hurting others with her fear of hurting herself. And Becky was bound to suffer for it, to curse her name and try her best to hate her. She knew Linda would return to Hatchetfield, eventually. Tom would too. But she couldn't wait, for any of them. They wouldn't wait for her. Life had to go on, and the world kept on turning, because it didn't care. 

She knew all that, even as she was small, somehow she always knew her story wouldn't have a happy ending. She refused to lose hope, always trying to change the ending, clinging to promises of forever. There was no forever. Even when letting go wasn't an option as well. 



But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss

I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs

The smell of smoke would hang around this long

'Cause I knew everything when I was young

I knew I'd curse you for the longest time

Chasin' shadows in the grocery line

I knew you'd miss me

once the thrill expired

And you'd be standin' in my front porch light

And I knew you'd come back to me

You'd come back to me

And you'd come back to me

And you'd come back



Is home a place, or a feeling? Linda always thought her home was Hatchetfield, and she knew she'd have to come back to it, even as she was leaving. And of course she came back, but it didn't feel so much like home anymore. Life had moved on. Maybe home wasn't a place, but a person. But Linda has been too afraid to say she loved her and ask her to come with her. Or at least beg her to wait. 

But Becky wouldn't have waited, and Linda didn't wait too. She often wondered if the price of her nose job wasn't too high. But as far as husbands go, Gerald wasn't that bad. Becky got the worst. Linda worried about her. She'd always listen carefully to the gossip, just to know if she was fine. She'd scrutinize Becky with her eyes every time they saw each other, and not just to check her out. She was fine, at least physically. But Linda didn't like that Stanley guy, and not just because he was fucking her girl. 

She's not yours anymore , Linda often had to remind herself. But she hoped for the day when Becky would realise that she was living with a piece of shit, and part of her wished that, when it happened, the redhead would appear in her front porch, looking for her. 

It angered her that it was taking so long. Sometimes she'd hate Becky for it, she'd blame her for staying with someone that clearly was no good for her. She'd blame Becky for never leaving her mind. Couldn't Linda at least forget about her? But she's always known that letting go was never an option. 

And she knew Becky wouldn't let go either. It was a matter of time, she'd come back. Sometimes Linda felt tempted to reach out to her, but her pride wouldn't let it. She was the one to reach for the first time. And she was also the one to leave. To reach out would mean apologizing, and she couldn't bear to do it. She would have to wait. And if she waited forever, it was just as well. Linda knew she was lucky for those brief happy months, and to ask for more was just her being spoiled. 

 [11:28 pm]  In our place. I need you.  

It was a weird feeling when she got that text from Becky. Half of her didn't have any hope that it would happen, the other half was absolutely certain that it would. Linda didn't hesitate. There was nothing else that mattered in the world. She barely bothered excusing herself from the party, any half-baked lie about her sons would do it. Gerald drove her to the square. Even after everything went to hell, their names were still on that tree. 



And when I felt like I was an old cardigan

Under someone's bed

You put me on and said I was your favorite



Linda was so pretty in that dress, with that little smile on dark lips, that for a second Becky forgot why she was there. But then Linda got closer, and her smile faded when she saw the bruises and reality hit again. 

"It was him, wasn't it?" She said, stepping even closer, towering above Becky, who was still sitting on the bench. 

It all came back at once, and she felt the tears running down again. 

"All the signs were there, weren't they? I should have seen them sooner, I should have--"

"Shut up, Becky." It startled her. Linda's tone was harsh, but not mean. She held her arms and helped her stand up, and pulled her to a hug. Becky let herself lean on her, physically and emotionally, and the tears came unbidden. "I'll kill him."

"Linda, no…" her protest was weak willed, and Linda scoffed, breaking the hug.

"Not right now. Right now I'm gonna take care of you." She held her hand and pulled her gently to her car. 

Becky got in the backdoor, and to her surprise, Linda did too, sitting by her side. The blonde woman just exchanged a look with Gerald through the rearview mirror, and he started driving. Becky realised she was trembling. She also realised that Linda never let go of her hand.

"Where are you taking me?" she asked, her voice trembling a bit. It's not that she didn't trust Linda. She'd just rather talk about anything other than what just happened to her. 

"Home." Linda answered, simply. 

Where is home? Could she ever feel at home again? Even in that square below her tree. Their tree . Even then, home felt unreachable. Did she even deserve to have a home? Wasn't it just taken away from her, by force? How could Linda take her home? There was no home anymore.

"No, your not…" she whispered, looking down at her own lap. For the first time in her life, Becky felt completely hopeless. 

Then she felt Linda's hands leaving hers as they went up to touch her cheeks. She cupped her face with those small warm hands, and pulled it gently to get Becky to look at her. The world narrowed down to her dark eyes, and the way the passing streetlights illuminated them. And then Linda kissed her softly, and the world disappeared for a second. 

She still felt the hurting, both physical and emotional, but she felt hope again. He didn't take everything. The kiss only lasted a few seconds, but it was just what she needed.

"Isn't this home?" Linda asked in a low voice, as soon as their lips were apart. 

Yes, it was home. Linda was her home. 

But then she remembered they weren't alone. She jerked away and looked at the driver, startled. Gerald. Linda's husband.

"It's ok." It came out of Linda's mouth, but Gerald nodded on the front seat. How was it ok? But it wasn't time to ask that. Linda pulled her close again, bringing her to rest her head on her shoulder. She nuzzled into the blonde's neck, and felt the thin lips brush her forehead.

"I love you too" Becky heard, just above a breath. It was the smallest of whispers, and it was more than ten years delayed. 

But it was home. 

 

Notes:

the movie I referenced in the blood bond scene is My Girl (1991) and I feel old that it marked my childhood LOL idk if the younger kids ever watched it, so it's basically a very sweet and sad tale of two kids having their innocent childhood first love.
Also, I'm sorry for giving a kinda angsty background for the whole "come down from that tree, Becky Barnes " thing that Nick said on a livestream, i know it was supposed to be a cute and funny little thing but I can't help myself.
Anyways, thanks for reading, any comments will be greatly appreciated <3