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He'd always question it. Question the inhuman science team, their uncanny expressions, traits, knowledge and behaviours. How desperate he had been every night, clawing at the seams of reality, begging for some sort of normalcy. He couldn't handle it, at first. The Sweet Voice, the fire, the power legs, the glowing, the teeth, the blood. God, the blood . It haunted him for many nights, the stench of blood, soaking into his suit, their clothes, permeating the air and forever staining their skin with it's metallic tang.
But they were always fine. Nothing phased them. Whenever one of them went down, they would pop back up, good as new if not better. He was envious.
He came close to death multiple times, from rockets to water, from aliens to his own team firing far too close to his head as a 'joke'. From falling from just too high, or getting caught in a so-called 'rope'. From getting ambushed by the military, betrayed by his own coworkers, getting his hand cut off with a serrated blade, to bleeding out in a pit. From crashing through sludge, toxic waste, clones, cradling his arm like a worthless weight holding down the rest of the crew. God, it still stung.
How come they just, weren't human? How come he was the only one that felt pain? Bubby screamed a lot, and Dr. Coomer spoke about being in excruciating pain, but none of it was lasting . They could just slump over and pop back up as if it was nothing. And Benrey, Benrey , oh how he loathed him, taking gunshots, grenades, rockets straight to the face and not even flinching. He remembered that day, the time he slugged a crowbar hit point blank against his skull, and all that monster did was take a step back and ask if he hit him, as if he didn't even feel it. He was a freak.
Gordon was normal.
Gordon felt everything.
Gordon was going to kill Benrey.
Blinking away sleep, Gordon turned on his other side in an attempt to pretend he was restless. He was, but he just didn't want to be half asleep anymore. Felt odd. Something was up.
The hairs on the back of his neck stood up along with the sensation of being watched, and Gordon took a breath, trying to guess who it was. When he turned over, he saw Bubby and Coomer hunched together, but before that, Tommy fell asleep first. No one should be awake, he was supposed to be the watch anyway. Just faking sleep so the 'night' would pass faster.
It was endearing that Tommy wanted to watch for the night, having spent most of the time by his side, protecting him while he was helpless, but.. He needed rest, too. Told him to go to bed as soon as possible and laid awake himself, not wanting to pass out from the pain and be unable to wake up. But, as tired as he was, he didn't let the sensation slide. Pushing himself to his feet before getting a look at whatever had been staring him down, he silently charged it. A feat near impossible in the bulk of the HEV suit, but he made it work. It would die, whatever it was, and he'd go back to the group, and they would wake up later and trudge on.
Gordon barreled out the office and lowered himself to turn the corner, just to see Benrey smirking at him. Staring at him with that awful, smug look on his pale face. He could strangle him. He would strangle him.
"what uh," Benrey smacked his lips, tilting his head up as his eyes trailed down to Gordon's stump. It dripped a steady stream of blood to the floor from being jostled, but neither seemed to really care about that. "what happened to your arm? kinda clumsy boy, aren't cha."
"I dunno." Gordon spat, taking a few steps closer. Benrey didn't have anywhere to go, he was at a dead end. He knew. He knew, because the group went there first before backtracking to rest for the night. He also knew Benrey could just phase through walls if he wanted. This wasn't time for that. "Wanna closer look? So you-- so you can make it out?"
Benrey blinked, slow moving, akin to cat-cum-insect, disgustingly flicked down to his arm then back to his face. That smug smile faltered for only the tiniest of seconds as Gordon continued to walk, and he saw it. "make out?" Was all he said, after that long pause of trying to get his feeble brain to work, and Gordon had enough.
His left hand came up, an action he grew used to doing now, and gripped Benrey's shoulder. Hard. Benrey didn't react. "Dunno." He said again, slowly sliding that hand up his shoulder and trailing it to his neck. Accidentally flipped his collar in the process. Really, he wasn't in it for the conversation, he wasn't sure what he was even replying to, but maybe he just needed to fill the void. Benrey looked down at his hand, or tried to, mouth parting slightly in a suppressed gasp as Gordon's warm fingers started to dig into the cold flesh of his neck. Even in the gloves of the HEV suit, they could feel the other's temperature differences.
"ti-ticklish--"
"Look." He held up his stump, raw, red, gorey. Flesh had been sawed and mangled, some bits of it having sloughed off from friction of the damaged suit, or fizzing from possible infection from sewer water or nuclear waste. Who knew. It was horrible to look at, to see the jagged bone being over encumbered with swollen, irritated red and purple muscle, to see skin peeled back or scraped off at the edges, and Benrey knew. He knew, because he looked away.
Nah. He did this, he might as well look.
" Look ." Gordon repeated, harsher this time, pressing his fingers harder against Benrey's neck. Hooked them under his jaw and tilted his head down, forcing him closer as he held his stump mere inches from his face. Had to smell the blood. Had to. His face scrunched up and he bared his teeth, in a threat that fell flat on Gordon. He didn't care about his threats. "You did it, are-- are you not proud ?"
"bro-- dude that's fucking-- gross, ungh-- stop it , Feetman."
That struck a nerve. Gordon dropped his arm, leaning closer until his head was laying on Benrey's shoulder, huffing soft laughter against his neck and feeling the guard squirm under him. His hand shifted, letting his thumb move to the other side of his neck. Pressed a little against the sides, in no ways trying to choke him. Just make him a little dizzy, just a bit light headed. Benrey sang some Sweet Voice but Gordon closed his eyes, ignoring it. Found that if he was already calm, then the Calm Down did nothing to him.
"Wanna see something more gross?" He asked, letting out a slow exhale, but not giving Benrey a chance to answer. It didn't matter what he said.
He sat back, making sure he was on full display yet still holding his neck, and moved his arm off to the side. The plating of the suit flexed, blood spouting out and pouring from the wound as if he tore through a leaking hose. It wriggled, twisting and parting within the confines of the suit, before spikes of bone jutted from the shredded shards of what remained and warped themselves into what resembled a hand.
Bones curled together like hot metal piping, being entwined by wires of tendons, muscle, fat, and skin. Skin that crawled across and clung to unruly, writhing flesh to force it into submission. Sickening pops and cracks came from the limb as it tried to settle into a shape, body arguing with itself over what was best, before settling with whatever it landed on.
The hand that surfaced was in no way human, peppered in scales and laced with way more fingers than needed or possible, each one tipped with needle-sharp claws that clicked when they tapped each other, and the hand did the same as the other.
Wrapped around Benrey's throat.
The extra fingers busied themselves into burying themselves into whatever patch of skin or flesh it found, digging deep and holding on, lodged between the guard's jaws, curling around a rib, or digging underneath his helmet and clawing at his rough, greasy feeling hair.
"Cool or gross?" He asked, not expecting Benrey to answer. He was long since frozen, arms pressed to the wall behind him and claws scraping against the tile. Blackish blood trailed from each puncture, soaking his uniform and staining Gordon's fingers. He flexed them at the lack of response anyway. "Eh, I don't… I don't care what you gotta say, even if you could talk. I don't think you've said a single important thing to me the entire time I've known you."
Gordon pressed close again. Close enough to notice Benrey didn't have a scent. The room smelled like their combining blood, like printer ink and copper, but Benrey distinctly didn't smell like anything. His new, sharper teeth glinted as he grinned, looking at the terrified expression on Benrey's face. He already struggled with keeping the right amount of teeth in his mouth, or if they were too sharp or too dull, but it didn't matter. They felt like saws in his mouth, and they were perfect.
Nothing mattered right now as he squeezed. Eyes of every colour possible and non perceivable by humans opened up on every available space they could find, mostly his neck and hair. Had to keep the face relatively normal, that was just his brand. He sure had a pretty nice face, afterall. Scales littered his face over his nose and peppering his cheeks, reflecting the steady beams of black and white Sweet Voice Benrey was so keen on showing. They probably meant something, but they were too far from the group to be heard, so it didn't matter.
"w...why?" Benrey stuttered out, jaw struggling to move with the claw and finger wedging it open at the socket. "thought… human." Didn't help that he didn't stop choking him, and he was currently clawing at his arm and the armoured plating of the HEV suit, as if that would stop his grip. His body flickered and faded multiple times, simply trying to glitch his way out of his hands or phase through a wall, but it wasn't working. Gordon wasn't going to let it work. "Gordon--"
"I am human," Gordon said, offended, and squeezed his neck harder. "Fucking idiot. I'm the normalist one out of all of you!" He laced his thumbs over Benrey's neck correctly now, pinning him to the wall he was so desperately trying to phase through. It wasn't working.
Benrey's struggles increased, lifting a leg and sharply kicking Gordon's knee. The suit absorbed most of the hit, but his body reacted differently, morphing within the confines of the plating. So that nothing had been damaged at all. Would have turned it into a better leg, as humans legs were flawed in many ways, but the suit didn't allow that. Didn't allow many things.
" Gordon ," Benrey choked, form starting to slip away from him, head tilting back to try to free himself from the claws insistently digging against his scalp, dislodging his jaw. Eyes opened up underneath that ever present shadow over his face, and Gordon's hand made sure to poke a few of them out. Had a few fingers to spare, anyway.
"I'm going to kill you, Benrey." Gordon said, matter of fact. "I'm showing you all of this, because I'm going to kill you, anyway. If-- say anything to the others, and they won't believe you. You've spouted nonsense since we all met. Maybe you might get Tommy to believe you," his hands tightened and Benrey looked at the ceiling, trying to kick him again. Sweet Voice got caught in his throat and leaked from his teeth like bile. "But you know, cutting off my arm only leaves a sour taste in everyone's mouth."
Just as his struggling slowed to just tiny moments, chest bulging in an attempt to get air to his lungs, mouth gasping like a fish, and clawed hands and limbs that sprouted from nowhere simply falling limp at his sides, Gordon let go.
Benrey collapsed onto the ground, coughing and gagging around the Sweet Voice in his throat, shuddering in fear and pain and staring up at Gordon. His body was well beyond ten degrees of Fucked Up still, but it was fading.
How many teeth did humans have? It was around 30. He settled for thirty. Chewed around the bones in his mouth until he counted thirty, and let the rest re-enter his body to do whatever else it wanted. Within restraint.
Humans didn't have scales, or claws, or multiple glowing eyes. Humans didn't have sentient hair. Humans didn't have an elongated snout. Humans didn't have… that , for a right arm.
"Whoops, forgot that happened." Gordon joked, taking a step back to hold his arm out. It flexed again, gaining joints it should never have a hold of as it curled in on itself. Claws merged together into a blade, sharp and serrated, and started to saw into itself. With each drag, the moments became sluggish and uncoordinated. Happens when you try to saw off your own arm. Muscles didn't like not existing. It was only another pass or two before the contorted limb fell to the floor in front of Benrey, wriggling like a dropped lizard tail.
It eventually stopped, and under Benrey's half-gone stare, it started to melt onto the floor in an unrecognizable puddle. Mass that just wasn't meant to be.
"Man, that stings," Gordon hissed, clutching his stump and turning around, slowly stomping back to the group without another word to the guard. "Gordon hurtin'. Gordon need sleep." He chanted, and Benrey watched, unable to do anything as he just breathed. He should have been able to do something, he wasn't human , but Gordon…? Gordon was something else entirely.
His pained act was back, or was it even an act? He dripped blood all the way back to the group, looking absolutely miserable as if he didn't just grow an arm, choke out Benrey, then cut his own arm off just to hold up an image. Was he trying to send a message? Prove a point? Or was he simply just trying to convince himself that he was a normal human being.