Chapter Text
Word had begun to spread that the Survey Corps was receiving new recruits that day. Strange , Claire Helios thought. The new cadets weren’t supposed to graduate for a few months. Who could they be? She was curious, these new recruits must be strong to have impressed Erwin and to have gained the Commander’s approval.
Finishing putting on her harness, which was a pain to put on, she heard a knock on her door. She opened the door while putting on her jacket. “Who-” Hange stood there, smiling. Claire panicked, saluting somewhat sloppily. “Captain Hange! I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting you!”
The bespectacled woman laughed. “No need to be so tense, soldier. I just came to ask something of you.”
Claire cocked her head to the side. “Um, sure. What is it?”
“This probably isn’t news to you, but we have three new recruits coming in later today. The Commander requested that us captains select our best to help train them.”
“Oh, cool! Who are you choosing from our squad?”
Hange raised an eyebrow at her.
“Me?!” she exclaimed in surprise. “Are you sure? I’m pretty sure Harvey could do much better than me-”
“Yes, I am sure,” Hange replied, laughing. “You are talented, and I think they will need someone with your gifts to help them. I’ve heard that one of them can be a real bore and is serious all the time. He’ll need someone to help brighten up his attitude.”
“You want me to help because sometimes I’m good at cracking a joke?”
“Precisely!” Claire looked at Hange, unconvinced. “Don’t look at me like that! I believe that everyone needs a good laugh at times. If not laughter, at least a smile. These days can be dark, and we need to bring some more light to them. Anyways, do you accept the position? It could help you rise to a higher rank in the near future.”
“Of course, Captain.” She smirked, running a hand through her hair. “I’ll be the one to break this man’s shell and make him smile.”
Hange chuckled. “I have faith in you.” Checking the time, she stated, “We’ll be greeting the fresh meat in an hour. I expect you to be there, right beside me.”
Claire nodded, watching Hange leave the room, closing the door behind her.
She heaved a long sigh, sitting herself into the chair at her desk. She looked at her reflection in the mirror. Messy brown hair swung halfway to her shoulders, deep blue eyes reflecting sunlight. Her round features were not those of a warrior. Would she be able to train the new Scouts? Did they have any experience with the ODM Gear? They had to know at least a small bit, right? It would be difficult for the selected few to train them in maneuvers without any teaching experience.
Claire glanced at the sketch that was wedged into the corner of the vanity, it contained a younger version of herself and her father. It wasn’t the most accurate of drawings, but she had tried her best. Picking it up, she smiled. Dad had been the one who inspired her to join the Survey Corps. He had been on expeditions with them when he was younger, and one time on a mission when he became crippled for the rest of his life. In the grasp of a titan, his legs were crushed. Luckily, he wasn’t swallowed because a fellow scout had taken down the beast and saved him, but he had lost his ability to walk. He was the one who taught her to try to stay light-hearted and positive. She tried her best to follow that advice, but, damn, it did get hard at times. A lot of the people she had grown close to had died.
Claire felt like she didn’t really have friends in the Corps, maybe that was because she had given up on trying to make them. Sure, she wasn’t actively trying to get close to anyone, but that didn’t stop her from joking around and smiling. She had to carry her fathers’ legacy with her by taking his advice, and thus she continued smiling. At least it had gotten her somewhere; now she got to train some new, and probably know-it-all, recruits. Sighing, she stood up and started to tidy herself for the day.
Claire hadn’t realized that the entire Survey Corps was invited to see the new recruits’ arrival. With much difficulty, she had navigated her way through the crowd in search of
Hange. Once she had made eye contact with the Captain through the mass of bodies, Hange laughed and beckoned her over. Giving Hange a stink eye, she continued to shove her way towards her. After much tribulation, she was beside the messy haired woman.
“Took you long enough! I thought you were bailing on me!” Hange winked.
Claire smiled and let out a quick laugh between her heavy breaths. Who knew that carving your way through the entirety of a military company could drain you so quickly?
The two chatted for several minutes while the other captains tracked down their selected trainers. Claire didn’t recognize any of them, not surprising considering how many came and went. She examined the group that would be her new companions. No one in the bunch seemed to stick out to her. There was one man who seemed pretty sociable, he was fairly attractive, not quite her type, though.
A hush fell over the Survey Corps as Commander Shadis came out to address them. Everyone lined up and saluted. Claire glanced at Hange, who seemed to be bursting with excitement. Curious, she thought. I haven’t seen her this excited about anything other than titans. The Commander raised his hand, dismissing them. The soldiers all relaxed. The Commander explained why they were all gathered together that day, describing the situation and who the three new scouts were. Criminals. They were criminals. Claire had known that these recruits were probably going to be a unique group, but she had not expected that . Former thieves would be difficult to teach, they were used to following their own rules, and not listening to anyone other than those they truly trusted.
This is going to be- her thoughts were interrupted as Erwin, the squad leader who had recommended the trio, announced the arrival of the newcomers, and they each made an appearance before the crowd. There were two men and one woman, no, a girl. She couldn’t be older than fifteen, with her reddish hair pulled up into two pigtails, and her eyes wide and filled with excitement. One man was tall and blonde, he had a slightly square jaw, and had an air of confidence about him. But they weren’t the ones who caught her eye. It was the last in the trio. He was short, for a man, of course. He was probably a few centimeters taller than herself. His facial features were sharp and narrow, including his pale blue eyes, that looked as if they could stab you. He had the worst case of RBF that she had ever seen, but that didn’t stop her from admitting that she found him quite attractive. This man was probably the one Hange was talking about. As she inspected him, Claire deducted that this man had never had fun in his life.
Shadis excused the Scouts from the meeting and they all split off. The sociable Scout from earlier was selected to give the three a tour. Claire stared after them for a moment, catching the eye of the short, grumpy man. His eyes hardened as he shot her a glare. She raised her hands up defensively.
Who pissed in his tea this morning? She thought. Sure, the guy was hot, but a bad attitude was an immediate turn-off. What was this angry human’s name again? Levi or something? She turned to Hange who had just finished discussing with the other captains.
“Alrighty, Claire,” she said enthusiastically. “Looks like you are going to be helping to teach them about how to properly kill a titan, and how to navigate in the forests with the ODM gear. They’ve used it before, but in the city, so this will be slightly different terrain for them.”
Claire did her best to hold back a sigh. She wished she had horseback duty. It would be much easier to have the new recruits learn how to ride. “Okay, Captain. I’ll do my best.” She saluted.
“I truly appreciate your help. Thanks a million!” Hange then proceeded to run off to one of her friends that she used fangirled about titans with.
She ran a hand through her hair, letting out a heavy breath. “This is going to be interesting.”
Teaching Levi, Furlan, and Isabel was a completely new experience for Claire. They were all so different in personality, she wondered how they were able to work together as a team without tearing each other to pieces.
Training Isabel and Furlan was easy enough, they were both very enthusiastic about the whole ordeal. Levi, however, seemed almost annoyed. That man… He should be grateful they let him join without going through cadet training… Much to Claire’s surprise, they had basically mastered the ODM gear, the only struggle they had was adjusting to how it felt to attach to trees instead of brick or stone.
Isabel was full of excitement and was fun to talk to. Claire could see them becoming friends, except for the fact that Claire was trying to cut herself off emotionally from everyone, and Levi was extremely overprotective of his companions. Furlan was a flirt, but still enjoyable to train and have discussions with. Levi was, well, Levi. He hardly spoke a word unless it was a sarcastic remark or a direct insult. He acted like he was better than everyone else there, which, after seeing his skill, could possibly be true, but still, she was his superior. He should treat her with respect.
Training them with the blades was an entirely different experience. Like before, the two cheerful recruits listened to instruction. This they did not master immediately. It wasn’t surprising considering how unique the weapons were. Nonetheless, they were quick learners and were performing well after a short time. Levi, on the other hand, was too good with the swords. It was more than the fact that he had used blades before, it was as if he instinctively knew how to use any weapon that was given to him. It was frightening to say the least. Not only was he a master with the blades, Levi had decided to use them in his own way. He held one blade backwards, reaching behind him, and attacked by spinning through the air. It was mesmerizing to watch.
“Levi, you aren’t supposed to hold it like that-”
He responded by shooting her a glare and “killing” the fake titan in the flashiest of ways.
Claire decided to stop protesting. He was getting the job done, that’s what mattered, right?
After each day of training, Claire had to report to Hange on their progress. It was not her favorite task, but it was better than dealing with Levi’s sour attitude. One evening, she came to give her report and was relieved to find out that it had been her last day of training.
“They will be going with us on the mission tomorrow. We are confident that they will be able to handle it,” responded her Captain when asked why the training had been cut short.
Claire nodded. “They are capable, but I’m still worried about sending them out this early.”
Hange’s eyes darkened. “We lost a lot of Scouts on the last expedition. We’re gonna need all of the extra blades we can get.”
“I see.” Claire hadn’t gone with the Survey Corps the previous time because she was training the new recruits. “I didn’t realize it was that bad.”
“It was a hard day for everyone,” she said, adjusting her glasses. “Anyways, you should get some rest, soldier. You’re going on the expedition tomorrow as well, so you will need it.”
Claire nodded, saluting. Hange excused her, and she left for her bedroom. As she walked down the halls, she passed the trio. They were standing in a corner, speaking in hushed tones. She stopped, curious. They spotted her, falling silent. Levi narrowed his eyes at her before saying something to his companions and walking off.
What was that about? She wondered. Shrugging it off, she continued to her quarters.
Her muscles ached as she took off her harnesses and changed into her sleepwear. God, she hadn’t realized how tired she was. Tomorrow was going to be a long and painful day. She crawled into bed, and started drifting off to sleep. Hopefully the mission goes well tomorrow…
In the beginning, the expedition was running quite smoothly. Well, as smooth as any Scouting mission could go. They traversed the green plains on horseback, passing several patches of tall trees, only few titans interfered, but they were slain quickly. This relieved Claire, she was glad the newbies didn’t have to deal with anything too serious for their first time leaving the walls. At least, this was what she was thinking before she saw the massive fog and storm that was coming towards them.
She glanced at her superiors, hoping they would call off the mission. They didn’t. The Survey Corps had to press on. A pit grew in her stomach. They wouldn’t be able to see anything. Including the titans. Even the most experienced soldiers would struggle, and probably die. She tried to spot Isabel, out of the three new recruits, she was most concerned for her since she was so young. Claire did her best, but to no avail. The clouds were too thick. She decided to slow down and listen as carefully as she could. Death was not something she desired.
Screams and cries rang out around her as she continued forward. After being a member of the Survey Corps for years, Claire still wasn’t used to the sound, and it shook her to her core. Wind ripped at her hair and clothes, water droplets getting into her eyes, making them sting. This had to be the worst expedition, and probably the one with the most casualties, that she had been in so far. That was impressive considering how deadly being a Scout was. Why did they decide to-
Her thoughts were interrupted as a giant foot stomped down right in front of her. Claire reared her horse back and moved out of the way. The titan before her was on all fours, picking up someone with its mouth. She heard the screams of Furlan. Oh, God.
She whipped the reins as hard as she could. The horse did his best, the wet earth making it difficult for him to go at a full gallop. As she rounded the titan, Claire saw bodies. Dozens of them. The grass was soaked with blood. Some bodies had limbs removed, others had holes in their stomachs, guts spilling out. She tried not to look at their faces, but she saw one that made her heart lurch. Isabel’s decapitated head lay on the ground, staring blankly into nothingness. She gasped, loosening her grip on the reins. A fatal mistake. Claire lost her balance and fell off of her horse. A sharp pain shot up the shoulder she landed on. It was probably dislocated. She tried to stand, but her boots kept slipping in the mud. She tried to activate her ODM gear, but it had been broken during the fall. Tears burned in her eyes. This was it. This was how she would die. Giving up on standing, she lay in the mud, staring at the grey sky, letting the rain pelt her face. This wasn’t the worst way to go, she supposed. At least she would go out like a hero-
The sound of the titan crying out in pain pulled her out of her despair. Someone was attacking the titan? She sat up, trying to catch a glimpse of what was happening. She heard the sound of blades slicing flesh and screams of agony, not physical but emotional, and watched as a blur wove its way around the titan in a spinning motion. Claire only knew one person who fought like that.
“Levi…” she choked out as she watched him. It was nothing like anything she had ever seen before.
The way he attacked was so different from what you were supposed to do. Normally, one would go straight for the nape, but Levi sliced at the entire body, weakening it before taking the final blow. It was impressive, and beautiful, in a strange way. He performed this act with such grace, it was impossible to look away. As she stared, she caught a glimpse of the man’s eyes. Lifeless. Cold. It was the expression of a man who had nothing left to live for. The titan fell as steam rose from its body, and Levi landed beside it, head down in defeat. Sure, he had won the battle, but at what cost?
Claire understood that feeling all too well.
It felt like ages before Erwin and the other Scouts found the two of them. They had been the only two who had survived that titan. With help, Claire stood and was guided to her horse. She rested her head against its chest, tears falling down her cheeks. So many were lost, but she didn’t really know any of them. Why was she sad? No. That wasn’t true. She had gotten to know Isabel and Furlan while she had taught them.
“I’m going to kill you!”
Claire lifted her head to see Levi, who was attacking Erwin. She gasped in shock as the tall blonde man, caught the blade in his hand and held it firmly. Claire has witnessed Levi’s strength, which seemed to be second to none, and Erwin was able to stop him so easily. She watched as the two exchanged words. Levi eventually dropped his blade, looking defeated and hollow. Erwin said something else to him, she couldn’t tell what it was, but afterwards she could see a spark in the ex-criminal’s eyes.
What could the man have said to bring Levi out of hopelessness? She wondered as a male scout that she did not recognize approached her.
“Do you need help? I couldn’t help but notice your…” He trailed off as he glanced at her shoulder. “You won’t be able to ride a horse like that, I can take the reins and you can ride with me.”
That was right. She had injured her shoulder when she fell. She hadn’t noticed the pain until the man had brought attention to the injury. “Yes, thank you.”
The two got onto the horse, Claire with difficulty, and they rode back towards Wall Maria in silence.
A solemn air hung about the Survey Corps after they returned. They had lost many that day, and no one spoke to each other. Claire was walking towards her room when she passed the balcony, spotting a small figure standing there alone. Ignoring it, she continued walking. As she was dragging herself down the hall, she started craving tea. Taking a detour, she stopped by the tea closet. She hesitated for a moment, her hand hovering over the teacups. After thinking about it for a moment, she grabbed what she needed and headed towards the balcony.
Stepping outside, Claire saw what she was expecting. Levi was leaning against the railing, staring into the sky. Claire placed her bearings on the table before moving to stand close to him, but still giving him enough personal space. She leaned against the railing, being careful with her shoulder. The medics told her that she had dislocated it, and they popped it back in place, saying it should be fine, but it was better to be safe than sorry. He glanced at her, narrowing his eyes. She didn’t know how to respond, this whole decision to come out here was completely on a whim. After a moment of silence, he turned away, walking towards the doors to leave.
“Levi- wait!” she called after him.
He faced her, his pale eyes piercing her. “What do you want?”
“I- um- I wanted to thank you for saving me today.”
Levi raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“That titan you killed, it was coming after me. I had fallen off of my horse and was injured, I had no chance, really. I kinda gave up on trying to get away,” she hesitated. “But then you came. So, thank you.”
“Tch.” He closed his eyes, scratching the back of his head. “Well, I wasn’t trying to save you. I just wanted to kill the damn thing because of what it did to Isabel and Furlan.”
“It doesn’t matter why you killed the titan, I’m alive at this moment because of you. I wanted to show you my gratitude by-”
“Do you really think sugar coated words are going to have an effect on me?” Levi asked, beginning to walk away.
“No, I trained you after all. I know how you don’t like to listen to what others have to say, but I did hear something about you…” She hoped that she could get him to stay.
He looked over his shoulder at her, cocking an eyebrow. “And that is?”
“Rumor has it that you are fond of tea,” She moved to the table, where she had set two teacups, some packets of tea (she wasn’t sure what kind he liked), a kettle with hot water, and some sugar.
He watched her skeptically. “You came out here because you had heard that I liked tea?”
“Yes?” Claire smiled awkwardly. Levi simply stared at the tea, face unreadable. She laughed softly. “Y’know what. You’re right. This was a stupid idea, I’ll clean up and let you be.” She started gathering the items off of the table.
“That’s not right.”
She looked up at him. “Huh?”
“I never said that it was a stupid idea.”
Before she could respond, Levi was pulling a chair out for himself. He sat down and looked up at her. “Aren’t you going to take a seat?” Claire looked at him, dumbfounded. He sighed, preparing to stand up. “Well, if you don’t want to have tea, then I guess I could-”
“No, please don’t go,” she said quickly, sitting herself down. “I was just surprised.”
She poured hot water in both of the cups as Levi examined the packets of tea. He chose one and placed it gently into the teacup, she followed suit. Dropping a few sugars into her cup, she grinned. It had been a long time since she had shared tea with someone. Lately, she had been indulging herself alone in her room. Glancing at Levi’s cup, she noticed it was plain, with no sugar in it.
“Would you like some sugar?” She held the dish up to him.
“No, thanks,” he replied flatly. “I like it plain.”
“Oh, okay.” Blushing faintly, embarrassed, she set the dish down.
Silence fell between the two, Claire didn’t know what to say. What could she say? This man had just lost the two people dearest to him. She started sipping her tea, glancing down at the table.
A few more minutes passed without any words spoken between the two of them. She realized that she hadn’t really made an effort to get to know Levi before, since he seemed so unapproachable. Conversing with Isabel and Furlan had been so much easier, and enjoyable. She had learned quite a bit about them, like Isabel’s love for sweets, and Furlan’s fascination with the ODM gear. The chance to talk had never come with the third new member, mostly because he refused to talk to anyone except for his companions unless he had to. The past was in the past. She had the opportunity now, and she was going to seize it.
Opening her mouth to speak, she noticed the way he was holding his cup. He did not hold it in the typical way, he grasped it around the rim, not using the handle at all.
“Why do you hold your teacup like that?” she asked, finally breaking the silence. He looked at the cup in his hand, and then back at her. “Oh, I’m sorry, that was rude of me to ask.”
Levi sighed. “No, it’s fine. One time when I was drinking tea, the handle broke and it spilled all over me. I don’t want to risk that happening again. It was painful, and it got everywhere. It took me ages to clean up.”
Claire laughed, that was not the answer she was expecting.
“It’s not funny! Tea stains are awful to get out of carpet!” He seemed very invested in the topic. Seeing him like this, it made him seem cute, almost. “And don’t get me started on the clothes that were ruined!”
“I’m sorry,” She tried to calm her laughter down. “But I didn’t peg you as the type to be passionate about cleaning .”
“Being clean is important,” he stated simply. It seemed like he didn’t want to continue on the topic, and was that a hint of a blush she saw in his face? Did she start to break down his walls?
“Okay, okay. I’ll stop teasing.” Claire smiled at him. “Since, I’ve learned about something personal to you, why don’t you ask me something. Anything.”
“Anything?”
“Yes.”
“Hmmm…” He stirred his tea thoughtfully. “Why are you having tea with me right now? You seem like a social person, and you’ve been a part of the Corps for a while now. You’ve got to have plenty of friends, even if you lose some every now and then. I’m sure any of them would be much better company than me.”
“Oh,” she replied. “I thought the question was going to be something more embarrassing, like, well I don’t know-”
“Why are you avoiding the question?” Levi asked. “You said you would answer any question.” He looked at her expectantly.
“Well, to be perfectly honest, I don’t have any friends.” She laughed awkwardly. “I normally have my tea alone, and I thought I could at least try to reach out to you and thank you. I thought that having tea would be a good idea so it wasn’t just us awkwardly standing out here. Plus, it looked like you needed someone to talk to.”
He looked away from her, chin resting in his hand. “That’s bold of you to think. What led you to that conclusion?”
“Well,” She looked down at her hands, which were clasped together in her lap. “You lost two close friends today, I thought maybe you wouldn’t want to go through that alone. I know how it feels to lose your friends to the titans. It can be very brutal.”
“I thought you said you didn’t have any friends among the Scouts?”
“I said I didn’t have friends right now. That doesn’t mean I didn’t have any in the past,” Claire stated, taking a sip of her tea.
Levi didn’t respond, the air about them grew tense.
“I kept losing my friends, making more, losing them. It became too much for my heart to bear.” Her expression darkened. “I figured it would be easier to not get attached to anyone in the first place. If I had no one close to me, then it wouldn’t be painful when they died.”
He nodded, understanding. “I used to be the same way. Before I met Furlan, I was convinced that being alone was the best, but things changed.” His face grew sad for a moment, but he quickly covered it up with his typical pissed-off expression. “Anyways, it’s getting dark out here. We should probably clean up and head to bed. We’ll need the rest after today.”
She agreed. The two of them gathered the tea supplies, Levi taking the dishes so he could wash them properly, leaving Claire to take the leftover tea packets and sugar. She smiled as she put them away. It was nice to see more of Levi’s character. At first, it had seemed like he was a cold, heartless criminal, but after that discussion she could see that he actually did have a heart, even if it was buried deep within his walls. Maybe they could chat again sometime? No. She couldn’t do that. She couldn’t get close to someone again, her heart would not be able to handle the pain of losing someone else.
Having a mini war with herself in her mind, she walked to her room and started getting ready for bed. Maybe, just maybe she could befriend Levi. She had witnessed the way he fought. Was there anyone or anything in the world that could stop that storm of a man? He had exhibited true power and strength, proving that he wouldn’t be taken down so easily. A slight smile appeared on her lips as she drifted to sleep. Nothing could possibly kill Levi, so she might as well try to get close to him.