Chapter Text
Katsuki sat in the passenger's seat of Eijiro’s car as they made their way to Katsuki’s house. They had spent the weekend at Eijiro’s family’s cabin. They had been trying to relight a fire that seemed to burn out in their relationship. They had started dating late in their first year and now they were approaching the end of their third year. So much had changed in that time. Katsuki remembered the beginning of their relationship, sure it was awkward but they were inseparable, Katsuki missed that. For a long time Eijiro was the only person that Katsuki could talk to, but now he felt like he was hiding things from Eijiro in a miserable attempt to make their relationship last just a little bit longer.
Katsuki glanced at Eijiro before looking back out the window, even car rides had changed. At first they would talk non stop when driving, once Eijiro got more comfortable with driving they would hold hands like some cliche rom com couple would. They would blast music and make fun of each other depending on the others song choices and then they would laugh at each other. Now they drove in silence, sometimes Eijiro would put on some music but it wasn’t the same. They didn’t even look at each other in the car anymore. Eijiro was all eyes on the road while Katsuki would look out the window and wonder if their failing relationship was his fault.
Maybe they spent all the fire that their relationship had too fast. Maybe the endless hours they spent glued to each other's sides had sent their relationship to an early death. Katuski had always been so certain that he would end up with Eijiro for the rest of their lives. Katsuki had daydreamed about their futures together, but now he couldn’t see himself in those futures. It wasn’t that Katsuki didn’t want those futures, it was that it seemed like they just weren’t meant to be. Katsuki still knew that he loved Eijiro, but he knew that Eijiro’s feelings had changed.
Eijiro had always been the one to pepper Katsuki with little kisses when they would hang out, he was always the romantic one. Now Eijiro never seemed to initiate any sort of romance between them. Katsuki had tried to be romantic, he tried his best, but it simply wasn’t his thing. Whenever he tried he seemed to mess up which ruined his confidence whenever he tried again. He never seemed to do anything right anymore, and that hurt Katsuki more than anything.
Katsuki blinked and shook his head once he felt the car stop. He glanced at Eijiro and just sighed, “I’ll text you later…” He saw Eijiro nod before he closed the car door and walked inside. He glanced around and sighed, no one was home.
He walked up the stairs and went to his room, laying down on his bed and staring at the ceiling. He wished he had someone to talk to, he wanted someone to reassure him that all of this was in his head and that he hadn’t accidentally ruined his relationship with Eijiro, but he knew he had to have been the reason it didn’t work. He was distant and snapped too easily, even when he was comfortable with Eijiro. He told the other everything and listened when Eijiro was sad and needed someone to talk to, but he knew that his responses didn’t ever help, even when Katsuki was trying to be sincere and helpful he always sounded like an arrogant bitch, and he didn’t know how to fix that.
As Katsuki kept thinking about it all he heard his phone go off, he sighed and looked at it, every time he got a text he was expecting it to be a break up text, but it never was. This time it was Deku texting the class group chat asking if anyone was free. Katsuki noticed that everyone replied quickly, which made Katsuki feel jealous, whenever he texted the group almost no one would respond, but everyone seemed eager to respond to Deku. Everyone was apologizing that they were already busy and that if they weren’t they would totally hang out.
Katsuki didn’t know why but seeing everyone reject Deku’s invite to hang out felt relatable to him now. He was used to being rejected by his classmates but now he had to deal with being rejected by Eijiro and he hated that feeling. Before Katsuki could really think about it to much he had texted Deku personally, not wanting others to know that he was accepting Deku’s invite to hang out.
K: Hey loser, i’m free right now if you want to go get a bite to eat or something.
It was a little late and Katsuki thought maybe they could just go and get a snack from somewhere, he just wanted to know if he had pushed Deku to far away as well.
D: Sure :)
D: I can pick you up right now!
Katsuki felt himself smile a little but before shaking his head and sighing, he was simply relieved that he hadn't made everyone hate him.
K: Yea, whatever, just hurry ok?
Katsuki sat up and glanced around his room, he went to the mirror he had and looked at himself. He looked the same as he always did, maybe the bags under his eyes were more noticeable since he didn't get much sleep anymore, now he stayed up at night wondering how he ruined the one good thing in his life. He noticed his hair was a little messier than it's already messy style thanks to the lack of motivation to do anything in the mornings. He just stared at himself, slowly picking everything about himself apart before he heard a car pull up to his house.
He sighed and walked downstairs, walking out of the house and seeing Deku's car. It wasn't anything fancy, just a normal teenagers first car. He huffed and got into the passengers seat, buckling himself in and then looking over at Deku who was looking at him excitedly.
Katsuki rolled his eyes and got a snarl on his face, "What are you looking at?" Katsuki knew he was probably being overly aggressive but he couldn't help it, he felt vulnerable and he hated it.
Midoriya simply chuckled and shook his head, "Nothing, I was just happy you agreed to hang out with me." Midoriya smiled brightly as he started to drive.
Katsuki watched him and then felt his heart stop when he saw Midoriya smile, the entire sentence he had spoke gave Katsuki butterflies, it all made him feel wanted. "Yea, whatever, I just didn't have anything else to do and it was sad seeing everyone else reject you." Katsuki thought that maybe he would offend Midoriya into acting a little less excited but out of the corner of his eye he saw Midoriya's smile grow a little wider.