Chapter Text
Steven and Stevonnie re-entered the swarm only to find Connie desperately pushing back against the form of Pearl with her one arm. Static and blood smeared all over her armor and hand in her attempts to hold back the shattered form of her mentor.
“i thought you were our fortitude...”, a small broken voice came from Pearl’s mouth as she twisted her head to meet her gaze, “Why didn’t you save me? You could have seen that Lapis’ ship was coming on Concordia if you had just set aside your feelings for one night and actually tried to protect him.”.
“No! That’s not true! I didn’t see it either, so there’s no way I could have been prepared for her ship!”, Connie cried, slipping on her blood and falling backwards onto the floor.
“you didn’t see her because you weren’t looking for her. you were too busy ogling at Steven the whole night to notice.”, the broken Pearl’s voice twisted into a facsimile of fondness as she leaned over the now cowering form of Connie, the static, once dripping, but now pouring onto her from the hole in Pearl’s head, like a twisted, grotesque fountain, “i told you, didn’t i? back when we first trained?”.
Connie tried and failed to scramble backwards, the words of her mentor seeming to cut at Connie’s very soul. Pushing herself backwards and away from Pearl, her hand met air and she spilled backwards over the edge.
A scream tore itself loose from her lips as she fell through the air, her fall eventually broken by a hard stone floor. Blearily, she got to her feet, only to find herself in the foggy sky arena back on Earth.
“Gemkind looks to you as their fortitude, but you forgot the first lesson i ever taught? pathetic…”.
“I- I’m trying my best! I’m doing everything I can!”.
“LIAR!”, a hollo-Pearl charged forth from the fog, forcing Connie to roll out of the way of an attack.
“what was my first lesson?”, Pearl’s voice rang through the arena as she stepped forward, her broken form radiating malice, “a knight should always be willing to sacrifice herself for her liege. if you were trying your best, he’d never have been taken in the first place.”.
“I… I…”, Connie faltered, as the static pouring from Pearl’s head pooled around her feet.
“you get a big fancy title, and all of these awards, and you forget your place. you forgot that to be a knight means that you are nothing, and that steven is EVERYTHING.”, Connie whimpered as she began to sink in the static, “and now look at you. you didn’t try hard enough to keep us safe. you couldn’t do your one job, and what do you have to show for it? Steven is dead, and it is all YOUR FAULT!”, Pearl let loose a screech as Connie freefell through the puddle.
Connie was rolling, tumbling through an abyss, the static having swallowed her whole.
“This isn't getting better on its own, and our words didn't really do much. Is there any other way we can help her?”, Stevonnie looked over to Steven, who seemed dazed and overwhelmed.
“I don’t know! You have far more experience with helping people through nightmares than I do!”, Steven seemed to shake himself out of his daze and focus on what Stevonnie was saying.
“I deserve this, it’s all my fault! It’s all my fault! Steven’s dead and it’s all my fault!”, Connie cried to herself, continuing to free-fall throughout the static.
“We’re not reaching her. I have an idea, but we need to unfuse. Is that okay?”, Steven turned to Stevonnie.
“Yes.”, Stevonnie tensed as they watched Connie continue to spiral, “Please hurry.”.
* * *
At once, a bright light filled Pink Diamond’s old room, as Stevonnie unfused into their two parts. Now unfused, Steven held onto Connie’s hand. It was surreal, looking around a room that he wholeheartedly expected to never see again after his experience with the horizon. Yet he couldn’t dwell on those thoughts, and instead forced himself to turn his attention back to Connie. Even in the dim light of the room, he could see the pain and fear etched across Connie’s face as she tossed and turned in her sleep.
“I’m okay, it’s alright, I’m here. I’m safe, Pearl’s safe. You protected us.”, he whispered gently, over and over, hoping that the words would ground Connie’s dreams and ease her nightmares.
Gradually, Steven’s words seemed to register with Connie, her breathing evening out and her body stilling. Slowly, Steven leaned towards Connie and kissed her cheek, her face no longer twisted into a tight grimace.
At that, Steven breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that Connie was no longer suffering from her nightmares. However, just as Steven was about to pull away, Connie wrapped her arms around him, locking him in a tight embrace. The feeling of Connie’s cold metal arm made for an unfamiliar addition to the hugs and cuddles that he was used to. Though the hugs themselves may change, the meaning behind them stayed the same, and he was infinitely grateful for his girlfriend’s protection and the love they shared. As he drifted off to sleep, a single thought passed through his mind.
“It’s good to be alive…”.
* * *
SUMMARY OF THE MINI-ARC:
The first chapter began with Connie having a particularly vivid nightmare of the attack on base Omnicron, wherein she failed to save Steven and her friends from the Conductor’s attacks. Steven tried and failed to comfort Connie through the nightmare, and ended up “falling out” of Connie’s nightmare and into the mind-scape. While Stevonnie’s manifestation was busying themselves with helping Connie, Steven was confronted with the manifestation of his negative thoughts which took on the appearance of the Rectificator. In the second chapter, Steven succumbed to his negative thoughts, and Neon Genesis Evangelion was referenced. In the third chapter Stevonnie went looking after Steven, eventually finding him. After a long argument and some close calls, Steven overcame his self-depreciative mentality and decided to live for his family and friends. In the fourth chapter, the Recitificator made an argument that Steven needed her (his negative self-deprication) for the purpose of self improvement, and holding oneself accountable - to which Stevonnie argued the opposite. In this back and forth Stevonnie let it slip that Connie intented to propose to Steven. With this new information serving as a wake up call, Steven ultimately decided to trust the words of others when they said he was a positive influence in their lives, and that he had value as a person. With that, Steven and Stevonnie walked back into Connie’s nightmare, the visage of the Rectificator disappearing. In this fifth chapter, Steven and Connie were faced with Connie’s nightmare, wherein she believes that Steven and her friends have all been shattered at base Omincron. A twisted nightmare version of Pearl confronted her and told her that she could be doing more to keep Steven and the gems safe, and that letting her guard down during the ceremony was selfish and a betrayal of all that she was trained to be. In order to stop the nightmare Stevonnie unfused to allow Steven to comfort Connie in the real world, in an effort to end Connie’s nightmare, which ultimately ended up working.
BACK TO TRIGGER WARNING IN THE END NOTE