Archive of Our Own

“Dean, I just don’t understand what was wrong with this one.”

Dean and Cas were walking away from the house they had just taken a look at. It was within easy driving distance of both the bunker and Sam and Eileen’s, had more than enough room for the two of them, and had a large garage perfect for Baby’s upkeep.

“It just… It doesn’t feel right. It’s not what we’re looking for, okay?”

“You mean what you’re looking for.”

Dean winced. “Sorry, didn’t mean to speak for you.”

“No Dean, it’s fine. You know I would gladly live in a cardboard box with you. If this is something that means this much to you then we can wait for the right place.”

Dean smiled at him and grabbed his hand. “Thanks man. Sorry I’m being so picky. I guess I just have a perfect vision of what I want our life to be in my head, and nothing I’m seeing is fitting it so far.”

“Well, this isn’t heaven Dean, nothing’s going to be perfect. I’m sure we can settle for something eventually.”

“You’re right, you’re right. Just humor me for a bit longer, okay?”

Cas smiled softly. “Of course.”

Cas didn’t remember much between being taken by the Empty and waking up on the floor of the bunker. The first thing he did remember when waking up, however, was the overwhelming hunger and thirst. Telltale signs of humanity.

Within minutes of awakening and gathering his bearings, Sam and Dean had burst through the door, and suddenly he had an armful of Dean, hugging him with a fierceness he had never felt from him before.

Eventually Dean let go long enough for Sam and Dean to fill him in on everything that happened with Chuck, and put together that Jack must have been able to bring Cas back as a human. Cas wasn’t sure if or when he would see him again, but if he did, he was going to buy Jack all the nougat filled candy bars he could find.

The next few hours after that were filled with contacting everyone to make sure they were okay. Phone calls led to meetups led to celebrating the freedom that came with defeating Chuck. With all that was happening, Dean and Cas never had a chance to talk, and the tension that seemed to linger from the earlier hug had faded once they had time to themselves again.

After a week of things returning to a semblance of normal, Cas had convinced himself that Dean was never going to bring up or acknowledge the confession. He had pushed back the disappointment and had convinced himself to be content with what he had, what they were now.

Then that night, things finally came to a head. He and Dean settled in to watch a movie, but Dean seemed to be nervous and fidgety the whole time. Cas tried his best to ignore it and watch the movie, but Dean started moving towards him, getting closer and closer until their thighs were touching. With his foolish human heart beating out of his chest, Cas finally turned to look at him, and then suddenly he had a lapful of Dean, with Dean’s lips on his own.

It took a few more days before Dean would finally talk about it, admit to Cas that he felt the same, had for a long time. Afterwards, things stayed mostly the same, except for Dean and Cas sharing a room, and the tension between them melting into a quiet closeness. Sam, for the most part, stayed quietly supportive, but Cas always caught the smug looks he threw at Dean, the ones that seemed to say he knew this was coming for a while.

Things attempted to continue as normal, but after what they all went through, after taking down God himself, nothing was going to feel quite the same. Sam spent more and more time away from the bunker with Eileen, and Dean seemed more and more willing to pass on hunts they found to fellow hunters.

Eventually, Sam announced that he was moving in with Eileen, that they found a place about an hour away from the bunker. Dean seemed happy for him, but Cas couldn’t help but notice a wistful look in his eyes.

That night, as they sat down to dinner, Cas turned to Dean. “Do you still want to stay here?”

“What do you mean?”

“The bunker? Do you want to continue living here?”

Dean looked nervously at Cas. “I mean, we kinda have to, don’t we? Just seems wasteful to leave behind all the resources in this place, to let them go to rot. Even with Chuck gone, there’s still a shit ton of bad guys out there, and I don’t know if I could live with myself if something in here could have stopped something out there.”

Cas gave him a gentle look. “I agree, but you know we don’t have to be the ones to do this, right? There are other people who can stay here, or we can leave it open as a waypoint, for hunters to come and go and use as they please, including us. I just want you to know, it’s okay to want other things Dean. No one will judge you for it.”

Dean looked down. “I mean… Sam and Eileen finding a place, I guess it just made me think about how I’d love to be able to do that too, to find somewhere and make it a home for both of us. That’s not something we’ve ever really had, you know?”

He smiled warmly. “Dean, you know I would go anywhere with you. I like the sound of that, and if it’s something you want, then I think it’s something we should do.”

Dean grinned back at him and pulled him in for a kiss.

The house hunting had started off well enough. They had agreed on their must-haves (within an hour of both the bunker and Sam and Eileen’s, garage for Baby, guest rooms for their inevitable visitors), and figured they could wing it from there.

But it seemed that with every suitable house they found, Dean would find something wrong. He never elaborated to Cas, just told him it “wasn’t right”. Cas had been patient, and promised to be for a while longer, but there’s only so much patience one person can have, even with the person they love.

Cas was about ready to give up and ask Dean if he was sure he really wanted to move, when a call came in one afternoon as Dean was out on a drive.

“Cas? Hey, you busy? I’m gonna text you an address, do you think you could take the truck and come meet me here?”

“What’s there that’s so important you couldn’t come get me?” Cas asked in a half teasing tone. After all, it was an unusual request from Dean. They both knew that he preferred to drive whenever possible, and Cas loved to let him.

Cas wasn’t expecting the nervous laugh on the other end of the phone. “I’m uh, kinda tied up here at the moment.” Cas heard footsteps as Dean walked away from wherever he was, and then Dean dropped his voice. “Actually, I may have kinda… stumbled across an open house while I was driving.”

“Dean..”

“It was completely coincidental, scout’s honor. Thing is… the house is perfect Cas. I want you to come out here to see it, so I can show you just how perfect.” Dean cleared his throat. “I had all the fake paperwork in the glove compartment too, so I uh… may have made an offer. A hefty one. And it may have already gotten accepted.”

Cas sighed into the phone. “Without even talking to me first?”

“I know, I know, I wanted to call you first, but there was another couple heading for the real estate agent, I could just see it in their eyes, they were about to beat me to it, and I couldn’t let that happen.”

Cas couldn’t help but chuckle. Dean and his impulsiveness. “Well, I suppose I can come take a look, and if I hate it we’ll go from there.”

“Seriously Cas, if you don’t like it we can just forget about it, I swear, I just couldn’t pass it up.”

“I doubt that will be necessary. As I’ve said before, the only thing I care about where we live is that you are there.”

“Well I still want your honest opinion, okay?” Cas heard a voice in the distance. “Crap, I gotta get back to the agent. I’ll see you in a bit, yeah?”

Cas smiled. “I’ll be there.”

After about two hours of driving, Cas pulled up to a pale yellow house in the countryside, with a large stone porch out front. Dean had Baby pulled into the long driveway, which Cas saw led to a sizable garage. He was leaning against the trunk waiting for him.

Cas walked up to him. “I take it this is the place you just put an offer in for?”

Dean smiled nervously at him. “Yeah, the agent just left a few minutes before you got here. ‘Dean Smith’ is in the process of becoming the new owner of this place. That is, if you’re okay with it once you see it,” he quickly adds.

“Well, I guess you better get the tour started then,” Cas said with a smirk.

“Right! Right, yeah, let’s go.” Dean grabbed him by the arm and dragged him towards the porch.

They walked in the door to an open living area with old hardwood floors and beige walls, with an open dining area to the right, and a staircase wrapped behind a gorgeous brick fireplace on the far wall. Dean let go of Cas’s arm and walked towards the fireplace. “This was the first thing that caught my eye. It’s great isn’t it? A house just doesn’t feel the same without a real fireplace, you know? And you gotta have your first real Christmas at your own home with a fireplace Cas. We can hang stockings here, and put a giant comfy rug right down in front...” Dean wiggled his eyebrows at him. Cas rolled his eyes but grinned.

Dean continued to lead Cas through a doorway to the next room in the back. “So the place has four bedrooms, but I figured this one we could turn into a den, or a home theater, so we can have as many movie nights as we want. Then that leaves two other bedrooms for guests, so Sam and Eileen, or Claire, or Jack, if he ever decides to take a break, can come visit.” Cas smiled softly at him. He really had put a lot of thought into what he wanted their future to look like.

They took a quick look at the kitchen, and then went upstairs to look at the three other bedrooms, Dean talking excitedly the whole time. Cas had to admit that the house was very nice, though he still wasn’t entirely sure what exactly made Dean decide so immediately on the place. They had looked at other houses with plenty of bedrooms or nice fireplaces, and he hadn’t seen this level of enthusiasm about any of them.

Cas turned to ask him about this as they came back down the stairs, presumably finishing the tour, when Dean looked at him with an excited glint in his eyes. “I saved the best part for last, are you ready?” With a quizzical look, he nodded at him, and Dean grabbed his hand and led him through the kitchen to the backdoor.

The door opened to an extremely spacious backyard, with a small copse of maple trees to the left and a large grassy field directly behind. Even from here Cas could see the abundance of wildflowers growing in the field, and the thought made him smile. Dean kept tugging on Cas’s hand, pulling him in the direction of the shed towards the back of the yard. “Come on, it’s back here.”

It? What was Dean leading him towards?

Assuming there was something in the shed, he expected Dean to head towards its doors, but was confused when he kept going, walking to an area behind the shed they couldn’t see from the house. Dean pulled him within sight of whatever was back there, and turned to look at him.

Cas gasped involuntarily. In front of them, just behind the shed, was a beautifully well kept apiary. The beehives were clearly professionally made, five houses stacked on sturdy elevated wood planks. The hives were painted different pastel colors and placed close to the field of wildflowers.

Dean began to babble excitedly. “The hives were all set up by the previous owners. The wife had a successful honey side business, but wanted to retire. They actually left all the proper equipment behind, and the shed is set up for proper honey storing, I guess? There are no bees in them right now obviously, but I talked to the agent and she mentioned that it was easy to order some from local beekeepers, there’s quite a few nearby since the climate around here is good for them... uh, Cas, you still with me?”

Cas hadn’t moved, had barely breathed. He was trying to listen to Dean, but the roaring in his ears was making it difficult. His brain kept going back to his own words he had said to Dean on the day the Empty took him. Everything you have ever done.... You have done for love.

Trying to hold back tears, Cas asked, “Dean.. did you put in an offer on this house because you knew I would love this? Because of me?”

Dean blushed and looked down. “Uh, well... you know... the garage is pretty frickin’ great too.”

Cas laughed but the end result sounded more like a sob. Dean looked back up, startled by the tears finally falling down Cas’s face, and walked up to grab him gently by the shoulders. “Cas, you okay? I didn’t mean to upset you, I just remembered how much you loved to watch the bees, and I want this to be a place where you can do things you love, you know? You’re human now and deserve to live a long happy life, and I don’t know, I just felt like taking this opportunity was one small thing I could do to help with that.”

Overcome with emotion, Cas threw his arms around Dean’s waist and buried his face into Dean’s neck. He couldn’t believe that this was his life now, that he was allowed to have this. Dean chuckled gently, nuzzling into Cas’s hair. “I take it you like it then?”

Cas pulled back. “Of course I do, how could I not? But Dean... you know that the only thing it will take for me to live a happy life is to have you in it, right?”

Dean blushed and looked down again with a smile. “Yeah, you’ve told me. Doesn’t mean I don’t still want to make you happy other ways though.” Dean threw an arm around Cas’s waist and turned them to look at the house. “So what do you think? Are you good with me having put in the offer? No last minute phone calls to take it back needed?”

Cas was about to agree, when he stopped short. “Wait, Dean, there is one thing. Didn’t you say you wanted to be within an hour of the bunker? It was a two hour drive for me to get here.”

Dean scratched the back of his neck nervously. “Yeah, I thought about that too, but I was thinking... maybe it’s best to put a little distance between me and the bunker. I know I’ll never be able to fully stop hunting, but if I make it a little less easy, then maybe I can feel better about letting someone else take the jobs that come in, and try to spend some more time away from that life. Plus, we’re still only an hour from Sammy, so he won’t be getting rid of me anytime soon.” Dean turned to look at him. “What do you think, does that sound okay?”

Cas smiled, and pulled Dean in for a quick kiss. “I think that sounds perfect. Now, what do you say we go pay Sam and Eileen a visit and tell them the good news?”

“Sounds great. Then later when we get back to the bunker, we can maybe have a little celebration of our own, huh?” Dean grinned suggestively.

Now it was Cas’s turn to blush. “I would not be opposed to that.”

Dean pumped his fist. “Come on then, let’s go make this visit with Sam quick.” Cas chuckled as Dean jogged to his car.

As Cas got into his truck, he took one more look at the house, at the place he and Dean would get to live out the rest of their lives, and realized that sometimes, happiness is in the having.