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Summary:

It was all over fucking twitter and Corpse was going fucking insane.

The first indication that something was terribly wrong was when he turned on his phone and it started blowing up with notifications. He had just woken up after going to sleep at 6am, and had apparently missed the apocalypse itself. Every single one of his fans was freaking the fuck out and as soon as he opened his notifications, he understood why. 

Notes:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PETRA
Hope this angst is to your liking!!!

Thanks to Life for helping me brainstorm, and Joce for the beta <3

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“Is it recording?” Lily swayed a little as she made her way to the tripod. “Brodin you fuck, you forgot to turn it on!”

A chorus of groans exploded around the room.

“Does this mean we have to reshoot the whole thing?” Poki threw a pillow at Brodin who dodged it with the mastery of someone who was used to getting shit thrown at him.

Next to her, Sykkuno sank deeper into the blanket he had wrapped around himself, taking another sip of his soju.

“It’s drunk truth or dare, what does it matter if you’re already drunk?” Brodin shrugged, checking to make sure the other camera had at least recorded something. Good news: it was on. Bad news: someone had left the lens cover on. “Let’s just continue, fuck it. Lily, do the intro again.”

“Ughhhh, Brodin, I hate you!” Lily groaned, throwing her empty bottle on the floor. She rubbed at her eyes, then fixed an annoyed glare at the camera. “Fine, fine. What’s up guys, welcome back to our channel. Today we’re gonna be playing drunk truth or dare with our friend Sykkuno.”

“We’ve been playing for an hour already, but Brodin lost the footage!” Michael quipped from next to her, pointing at Brodin.

“Hate you, Brodin!” Another pillow went flying at Brodin, this time hitting its mark.

 

For all his stuttering and bumbling, Sykkuno usually felt pretty confident when in front of a camera and surrounded by his friends. This was not one of those times. 

“W-wait, what do you mean?” His cheeks felt hot, and not just because of the alcohol. “You want me to...to-”

“Kiss Toast, on the lips.” Lily raised an eyebrow, turning the card around so he could read for himself. She wasn’t making it up. “Or tell us what you really feel about Corpse.”

Toast made kissy faces at him from Lily’s other side, leaning over her lap, and got swatted away in response.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, Brodin!” Michael exclaimed in disbelief, staring right into the camera.

Sykkuno clutched his blanket tight. “W-what, what? What do you mean? I like Corpse... I mean… we’re friends, I think?”

“Sykkunooooooo just admit it already, we all know!” Poki poked his ribs playfully, and Sykkuno felt his cheeks grow impossibly redder. Everyone was staring at him expectantly, from all sides… he just wanted to sink into the couch.

“Hey Sykkuno, you don’t have to… you know?” Yvonne bit her lip in concern. “We can just cut this part out…”

He turned to Scarra, who looked disappointed but nodded at her. Sykkuno felt bad… he knew how much publicity this would bring OfflineTV. The fans would eat it up and… they were his friends, always having his back… he could give Toast just one little friend peck and it would be alright… right? 

“...Okay...okay…” He took a deep breath and stood up. “How do we do this?” 

Everyone went silent, all of their eyes wide.

“Wait, you mean for real?” Scarra stood too, motioning at Brodin to reposition the camera at the best angle possible. Thumbnail, someone whispered.

Even Toast looked shocked.

They shouldn’t be so surprised, Sykkuno thought. Friends kiss friends all the time, it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just a little kiss.

 

Brodin tugged Sykkuno into position before rearranging the lighting. Toast slowly stood, smoothing out the wrinkles of his shirt with an incredulous expression on his face. 

They were making a huge deal out of something very insignificant and it made Sykkuno nervous.

Brodin had everyone vacate the couch so they wouldn’t be in the shot. So now it was just Toast, standing in front of Sykkuno, with two cameras pointed at them from different angles.

 

Then Brodin gave the signal and Sykkuno took a deep breath, steeled himself, and leaned in. As an afterthought, he shyly took hold of Toast’s arms. Toast leaned forward and their lips lightly brushed together. Sykkuno felt himself get lightheaded, too self conscious to breathe on his friend, too nervous to do anything but stand there, eyes closed shut and lips pulled in a tight line. When the awkwardness became too much to bear, Sykkuno pulled away the slightest bit. He could still feel his friend’s breath hitting his face, and he was having trouble catching his own.

“Sykkuno are you okay?” He could hear Lily’s worried voice from his left.

“Sykkuno relax a little, Toast won’t bite you…” Poki said with a giggle. “Unless you ask!”

“You call that a kiss?” Toast spoke against his lips, voice husky.

“...Yeah?” His own voice sounded hopeful.

“Can I try?” Toast’s eyes closed and he bumped his forehead against Sykkuno’s, but he kept his distance. 

Sykkuno looked away, wrapping his arms around himself. Despite feeling guilty for not giving them good content, this was pushing hard at his comfort zone.

“We’ll waive one month of rent.” Scarra interrupted.

“Two months!” Poki added, amusedly. 

“Three!” Michael shouted from next to Lily.

“And we’ll pay your water bill.” Yvonne sounded far more enthusiastic than she had any right to be.

Wait a second, that was actually a pretty good deal. Sykkuno took a couple seconds to think it through, mentally adding up just how much that would be. “All my water bills and three months of rent?” 

A chorus of yes! with varying degrees of enthusiasm answered him.

Just one more friendly kiss between friends, what was the big deal?

“Okay.”

No sooner had he got the words out, Toast’s lips were on his. Sykkuno’s eyes opened wide, body tensing against his friend’s. Then Toast moved a hand to trail up his neck and massage his jaw, and he found himself relaxing, letting himself be led by Toast. Their lips moved together, slick with saliva. Sykkuno didn’t even notice his mouth had opened until a warm tongue brushed against his. Toast pulled him closer, hands buried in Sykkuno’s soft hair, and Sykkuno’s arms slid around Toast’s waist. Rather than discomfort, Toast’s breath hitting his cheek had heat pooling low in his stomach. Then he felt a sharp nip on his bottom lip and couldn’t help the little whine that tore out from his throat. Toast broke apart with a start. His cheeks were flushed, his breathing was fucked, and Sykkuno was sure he didn’t look any better. 

 

The other members of OfflineTV looked on in shock, all but forgotten by Toast and Sykkuno.

Scarra ran a hand through his hair in resignation. “We can’t show that.” 

Next to him, Brodin nodded. “Let’s just keep the thumbnail.”



It was all over twitter.

It was all over fucking twitter and Corpse was going fucking insane.

The first indication that something was terribly wrong was when he turned on his phone and it started blowing up with notifications. He had just woken up after going to sleep at 6am, and had apparently missed the apocalypse itself. Every single one of his fans was freaking the fuck out and as soon as he opened his notifications, he understood why. 

The little sleep that still clouded his mind vanished immediately. His blood ran cold when he saw it

In a fit of anger, he threw his phone against his bedroom wall, feeling a vague sense of vindication at seeing it broken on the floor. Late afternoon was too fucking early to be having a mental breakdown. His chest ached and his heart raced and his breathing ran ragged and his head was spinning and his heartbeat thrummed on his eardrums. He closed his hands over his nose and mouth, hoping against hope that it would at least help his lightheadedness. 

Belatedly he wished he maybe hadn’t just busted his phone open. It might have been nice to have some background music to this disaster. Or anything to keep his mind off it, really. He couldn’t get the picture out of his head.

Hundreds of people had sent him the same thing: the thumbnail in OfflineTV's latest video featuring Toast in what appeared to be a passionate lip lock with Sykkuno. Their eyes were closed, Toast's hands buried in Sykkuno's hair. Blush had been digitally added to their cheeks and cartoony hearts surrounded them. The title of the video proudly proclaimed DISGUISED TOAST FINALLY FINDS LOVE???

Corpse was going to be sick. 

They were supposed to stream together later that day but Corpse didn’t feel like he could face Sykkuno. What could he say? What would even be appropriate to say in this scenario? You look cute when you're being kissed, wish it were me? The mere thought of even watching the video made him nauseous. 

As soon as the nausea abated and his heartbeat returned to normal, he dragged himself out of his bedroom and headed straight to the kitchen. He needed a bottle of wine… or two...