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Wei Wuxian sighed for what felt like the millionth time that day. He’d been drinking away, trying to drown his worries, his anger, his guilt away; Imagine how successful he was at it. The wine was barely doing its job, didn’t even burn his throat at this point, had no taste to it, he didn’t even want to drink anymore. And apparently, the juniors took notice of that odd development, eyeing him with worry, doubt, nervousness. Just like last night...
He pouted, rubbing his temple. It wasn’t undeserved, considering how angry he’d been before.
Not at them. But still.
“Master Wei, are you… Alright?” He nodded profoundly, exaggerating the movement and ignoring the dizziness that followed. “Are you sure? I never saw you reject wine before,”
Wei Wuxian let his head fall forward, winning miserably when his head hit the wood. “You and me both…” He closed his eyes, ready to gather the courage to go back to his room and sleep off this horrible, terrible, not good at all day.
That is until he heard someone else speaking. “Unlike Hanguang-Jun! He grabbed the whole bottle and went outside without a word!” It was light-hearted and just supposed to be fun.
But Wei Wuxian knew exactly how Lan Wangji got with only the barest hint of alcohol. “Where’d he go?…” It would be better to bring him to his room and get him in bed.
Ugh, that would be awkward… They just had a huge fight, and now Wei Wuxian was going to tuck him in bed.
Well, Wei Wuxian was the only one speaking during the fight. Screaming, rather. He brought a hand to his chest, rubbing the area a little. Damn curse, but he wasn’t without blame either.
“Just out, Master Wei,”
He pushed himself up, swaying a little as he went, and walked out, looking around for Lan Wangji. It shouldn’t be hard to find him. After all, not only was Wei Wuxian used to him by now, even with the dizziness from the alcohol, Lan Wangji stood out. No matter where or how it worked, he just did.
But he was nowhere near the inn, as Wei Wuxian finished his second lap around and saw no sign of the man. He sucked in a deep breath, ignoring how the cold air out suddenly got colder and how he felt his limbs become stiffer and heavier. He just needed to choose a direction and go. Lan Wangji couldn’t have gone far, it couldn’t have been so long.
Just focus. Would Lan Wangji go up or down the road? Deeper towards the city or towards the road leading out?
Last time, he remembered Lan Wangji going straight for a little home away from multitudes. Hopefully, that was a trend of his.
Wei Wuxian rubbed his arms, chasing the cold away, and set on with wide eyes. He needed to focus, otherwise, for as visible as Lan Wangji was, he would miss him. Easily, if the man was lying on the grass, or amongst the trees and bushes; He needed to be quiet as well, as the wind howled loudly by his ears and shook the treetops and foliage around him, he wouldn’t be able to hear a fight, or worse yet, a cry for help from too far away.
As he came up the dirt road on a little hill, Wei Wuxian felt his blood run cold as ice with the not so distant howling of spirits. There was something out here and it was closer than he imagined. Worse yet would be if it could see him. Had it seen Lan Wangji?
Wei Wuxian held his breath and rushed down the hill, looking in every direction for a hint of Lan Wangji, shaking all over, barely able to hold Chenqing in his hands. He didn’t know if the sweat was building up from the alcohol or the adrenaline, or both combined. All he knew was that he needed to find Lan Wangji and get him back to safety as soon as possible.
He barely stopped to caught his breath when he saw tiny droplets in the dirt. Nausea reached him far too fast to react, but he held back, cursing the tree he was leaning against, instead, for blocking his vision. Was it water, blood? Impossible to tell.
What he could tell, were the eyes staring at him from the treeline. Wei Wuxian shook his head angrily and grabbed Chenqinq, bringing it to his lips and playing with his heart hammering at his ribs.
There were a lot, some of which were bold enough to reach for him, try to snatch his flute, or his arms and legs. Anything they could get their hands on. Soon enough there was a circle of desperate spirits, knowing they couldn’t win but not willing to go without a fight; He dodged, kicked, kept playing, kept looking around for Lan Wangji. The situation was not as difficult as it was exhausting. The amount of alcohol he drank before deciding enough was enough turned out to be hindering him in this little quarrel.
Probably sensing this, the last of the spirits decided running off was the better option, and they left Wei Wuxian at the crossroad.
Unsure of which path to follow, physically tired and mentally drained, worrying about someone who the last thing he said to was in a fit of rage, and even then, Lan Wangji didn’t dare to answer in kind.
Wei Wuxian sucked in a breath, clenching his jaw. What the hell was he supposed to do now? How would he find Lan Wangji? Stupid, he could’ve gone anywhere, at this point he could’ve-
Ding
Ding
Ding
Wei Wuxian frowned. A bell? Who would be waving a bell this time of the night? Turning to look to where the sounds were coming from, Wei Wuxian was surprised to see first a cow.
A red and white cow with large horns, which were completely covered by flowers of all shapes and sizes. It was hard to see much since it was coming from a dense area, but he saw the ring on her nose when she licked it, and the ropes that were leading behind her.
He squinted, got up, and walked towards the animal a little, craning his neck to see what was going on. Riding on the back of the animal was a familiar figure, dressed all in white as if going to a funeral. Just so happened to be sticking more flowers in the cow’s horns. Once he finished with the current one and looked up, He let his mouth hang open.
“Wei Ying.”
Immediately he felt the tension leaving his body and ran up to the cow, not sure whether to laugh, cry or scold Lan Wangji for this stunt. He felt the tears stinging at his eyes and didn’t try to hold back, gave the same treatment for the laugh bubbling up from his chest, but didn’t forget the way Lan Wangji was still putting flowers on the cow’s horns.
“Are you crazy? Leaving in the middle of the night while drunk?! And where did you even get the cow?!” Lan Wangji stared at him for a full minute before slowly turning around and pointing to the direction he came from. “Lan Zhan!”
He made a small sound and got down from the cow, stumbling as he did so. Wei Wuxian couldn’t help giving him a hand to regain his balance, even when his mind was clouded by the anger; Lan Wangji, once firm on his own two feet, turned right back to the cow and took off a basket full of flowers from her back. Without wasting a single moment, Lan Wangji reached inside the basket and shoved a flower on Wei Wuxian’s face.
Three bright red flowers with yellow centers, actually. He smiled, taking them from Lan Wangji, who stepped to the side and motioned towards the cow with his head. “Ah, got it,” He nodded, putting each of the flowers in her horns. “Hey, did you know red primroses mean passion?”
Instead of being flustered, or showing disdain, or simply being annoyed, Lan Wangji stared at Wei Wuxian for an entire minute before shaking his head. “No.” Even then, he avoided looking at Wei Wuxian.
“You’re no fun, Lan Zhan,” He placed the last flower on the cow’s horns, and she turned to him, licking her nose. “You’re so good with animals, the last cow I met chased me across the fields screaming like crazy,”
He heard a tiny hum and assumed that was all the response he was going to get; Until he felt two arms wrap around his middle and lift him up with no effort at all to sit on the cow’s back. “LAN ZHAN!”
The basket of flowers was shoved in his face again. This time he was supposed to choose, as Lan Wangji just kept the basket in his reach and went to work decorating the cow’s horns; He noticed Lan Wangji had tied some moss and grass around the horns to help maintain the flowers in place. He had to smile at it all, the flowers he chose, the arrangement, the way this whole situation was playing out, everything.
He’d already forgotten about his worries, and the anger he felt before was nothing but a distant, hurtful memory.
Lan Wangji picked a dahlia from the basket and carefully put it on the arrange, towards the front. Then changed his mind and moved it a little to the side. Reached back and grabbed another one, placing it near the first, a little higher.
Not wanting to let Lan Wangji be the only one decorating their new bovine friend, Wei Wuxian went to work, starting with the multitude of camellias in the basket. His vantage point from the cow’s back was helpful when she looked over the treeline, where the spirits had fled to, and stared in that direction.
The few Queen Anne’s laces scattered about went to the lower area of the arrange, like foundations. Wei Wuxian smiled a little and looked back at Lan Zhan, intending on giving him a lesson in flowers. The man was currently undecided in which flower to use next, so Wuxian lightly pushed a branch of white heather towards him. Lan Wangji immediately grabbed it and fixed it on the left horn.
The small white flowers and the colorful blue ones came into the mix as well, and before long, their little cow friend had her horns covered with messages of adorations, wishes for a better future and affirmations. A walking symbol, he thought.
Wei Wuxian held his tongue back.
They were just having fun, he could embarrass the life out of Lan Wangji later.
Once they were reaching the end of the basket, still with some flowers left and no more space on the horns for them, Lan Wangji took a good look at their work, grabbed the ropes, and started leading the cow towards town.
“Lan Zhan! What are you doing?! You can’t just- You’re stealing farm animals again, Lan Zhan!” He cried from the back of the cow, with no means of escape while they moved. Lan Wangji, of course, ignored him.
Wei Wuxian blew the hair out of his face, pouting as they walked back to town.
But it was nowhere near true annoyance. Sure, they stole a cow and that was wrong. Quite honestly, it was the most (calm) fun he’d had in a while, and despite being drunk and worrying him, Lan Wangji was still fully capable of defending himself. He shouldn’t have been worried in the first place.
When something caught his eye in the foliage, however, Wuxian had to jump down from the cow and grab it, hiding it behind his back and Lan Wangji rushed over and helped —no, he was forced— him back on the cow’s back.
He had to admit she wasn’t so bad. Red and white, full of spots, one eye surrounded by red fur, the other by white, opposite ear red, and the other white; Point being, she was cute for a huge animal that could trample them. Also very sweet, as she hadn’t tried to buck Wei Wuxian off or complained about her situation at all. In fact, she seemed far too invested in trying to eat Lan Wangji’s hair to notice someone was on her back.
When they reached the Inn, Lan Wangji stopped walking, unsure of what he should do now. Wei Wuxian seized the opportunity and nudged the cow to move a little closer, then grabbed the branch he’d been hiding until now and plucked a single purple flower, grabbed Lan Wangji to pull him closer, and fixed the tiny flower on his hair.
The man took a while to notice it, and then spun around trying to see it. Wei Wuxian giggled, grabbing his shoulder and pulling him closer so he could put more of the purple hyacinths on his hair. Once done, he smiled, remembering the things he said, how he said them. It was an empty smile, but he hoped to be forgiven in the future, and with that hope, he reached towards the basket again, grabbing a pink spider flower and fitting it in with the hyacinths.
Lan Wangji lifted both his eyes as if he could see what his hair looked like now, and when he decided that it was impossible, he just looked at the basket, then drifted his eyes to Wei Wuxian. Then gently laid his head on Wei Wuxian’s lap, letting out a calm breath.
Wei Wuxian also let out a calm breath, feeling as if a weight was removed; Ironic, considering it only happened because of the weight on his lap, currently with closed eyes and breathing softly. He fixed one of the flowers on Lan Wangji’s hair and let his fingers linger on his head for a moment.
“Lan Zhan,” He hummed, not giving any other sign of listening. “C’mon, you need to sleep, let’s get her back so you can rest,”
With an attitude far too close to pouting, Lan Wangji finally relented and grabbed the ropes, leading the cow towards the stables. He got a look at Little Apple, who was currently laying down to rest with four apple cores by his side. He just shook his head, ignoring the donkey and climbing down from the cow.
But he didn’t get one step away before Lan Wangji grabbed his arm and pulled him to the hay pile and basically trapping him there. “Lan Zhan,” He said in a warning tone. It clearly fell on deaf ears and the other grabbed the flower basket, still with quite a few flowers, and turned to Wei Wuxian. “… What?”
“Turn around.” He muttered. Not wanting to debate too much, and hoping that by doing what Lan Wangji wanted they could go back to the inn, he turned around.
And felt two hands at his hair. Wei Wuxian wanted to turn around and see what the sneaky little shit was up to, but quickly gave up when he felt the fingers moving around his hair.
That felt… Really nice, actually.
So Wei Wuxian let Lan Wangji continue with his project, becoming more and more relaxed, feeling his body going lax, his mind drifting… At some point, he knew he was about to fall asleep sooner or later, but Lan Wangji wasn’t giving him an opportunity to break out of the spell, so all he could do was sit there, almost falling asleep, and let the man work on whatever it was he was doing.
As there was no way to get free from it, Wei Wuxian just enjoyed the nimble fingers dancing in his hair, moving around, inviting him deeper and deeper to a peaceful dream. But he couldn’t sleep, not just yet, had to take Lan Wangji back…
So sleepy, almost falling face-first in the hay…
Finally, Lan Wangji was done with it, and instead of being led out of the barn, they stayed right where they were; On a pile of hay, by a cow’s side. Wei Wuxian was so drowsy he barely could open his eyes to look around them, didn’t feel like it, couldn’t open his eyes or move his body if he wanted to; Just accepted being laid down and cuddled closer to the warmth laying on his side, curling up to it.
This felt just right.
——
When the first rays of sun breached through the barn, Wei Wuxian groaned and hid away in the warmth, in the soft clothing. He involuntarily smiled, happy to have escaped the foul wishes of the sun. How dare it invite him to wake up? Leave this perfect dream?? Preposterous! He nudged even closer, if that was possible, and let sleep drag him back.
Though, his determination to stay asleep was no match for Lan Wangji's in deciding to wake up. “Wei Ying,” He felt the hand on his shoulder apply the slightest bit of pressure and refused to move. “Wei Ying?” A little more forceful, so he groaned and moved closer, curling up more. The hand didn’t leave his shoulder nor did it ever stop shaking his, even if only slightly. “Wei Ying, wake up,”
“Laan Zhaaaan…” He moaned, finally giving up on his plan of staying asleep for the entire day. Once he opened his eyes, Wei Wuxian was treated to too much hay, far more flowers than he expected laying around, and the cow, of which they used as a pillow apparently.
That explains why his neck was so stiff. “… What… Happened last night?” Lan Wangji asked, looking around them. The cow sniffed at his face and he gently pushed her nose away from him.
“You drank again,” He yawned, taking a good look at Lan Wangji and his flowery hair with purple hyacinths and a large pink spider flower. He smiled. “You got all of these flowers, and the cow, of course,” It took that moment to sniff at him again, only to be pushed to the side. “By the way, do you know what all of these mean?”
He saw Lan Wangji become redder, he saw the way he turned around as to not look at him but didn’t admit it. “No.”
“Shame, let me tell you then,” He grabbed the basket, which was still filled with all the flowers they used on the cow and a few others as well, some of which he’d never seen before. “I think I said it last night, but red primroses mean passion,” He winked at Lan Wangji, earning a strained sigh and heavy blushing.
Cute.
“Dahlia’s are for pride and love,” He seized the opportunity to fix one within Lan Wangji’s hair, which was already heavily covered in flowers. “White camellias means ‘you’re adorable’,” He felt his hands shaking, but braved through it and fit another flower in Lan Wangji, “Pink ones are ‘longing for you’,” Wei Wuxian held back his anxious thoughts. They had a rough moment, and this —Whatever it was— served to help them make up. “And red ones means ‘you’re a flame in my heart’,” He finished placing them on Lan Wangji’s hair, and moved on to the next flowers.
“These,” He held the queen Anne's lace, debating how to best fit it in with the rest of the flowers, “Means sanctuary,” Quite honestly, the basket Lan Wangji got had far too many flowers to have been hand-picked but he wouldn’t dwell on it at that moment. “And white heather is for ‘protection’ and ‘wishes will come true’,” He finished, looking over the remaining flowers.
Maybe they could fit them in the cow’s fur. “And these?” Wei Wuxian looked at the small purple flower on the other’s palm.
He held his breath back, moving to sit more comfortably in the hay, leaning against the cow, who was almost achieving her dream of licking Lan Wangji. “They are me asking for forgiveness…” He bit his lip, not daring to look in the other’s eyes. “I shouldn’t have said those things, not in any way, much less like that.”
Now Lan Wangji was the one to sit straighter, but he looked Wei Wuxian in the eyes, not shying away from the situation. “I need to clear things. I do not just pity you, nor do I want anything from you.” He closed his eyes and lightly bowed his head, “If you need me to prove it, I will.”
Wei Wuxian tipped his head back and held his breath. He really said horrible things in a horrible way, and nothing would ever take them back. They would forever be marking their relationship, an ugly wound to sting and hinder them; But that wasn’t to say they couldn’t treat it, turn the bleeding thing into a simple scar, still marking the pain, but possible to live with.
For now, Wei Wuxian just threw himself in Lan Wangji’s and held on for dear life, as if releasing him at that moment would be letting go of his hand in Nightless City all over again. And the moment he felt Lan Wangji wrap both his arms around him, Wei Wuxian almost broke.
He was tired. So, so damn tired of everything. Worse yet, he knew exactly what he wanted, what he needed, to feel at peace; Because he had a taste. It was at his reach, he could have it at any moment. But Wei Wuxian was terrified. Terrified of finally letting go and pursuing this happiness only so it can fizzle away as soon as he settles.
At least, this was enough to calm him for now. It was their own moment, and it gave him a moment to breathe.
Their own moment, however, was interrupted by their bovine friend, who finally reached Lan Wangji’s hair with her tongue, pulling at it. Lan Wangji made a little noise of surprise and pain, and before he could react and get away, she licked the side of his face all the way to his hair.
It was hard for Wei Wuxian to help with his laughing fit. “Don’t be mad, it means she likes you!” He said while failing to hold his laughter. Wei Wuxian pushed her head away and got Lan Wangji out of the way, but before he himself could get up, the cow decided she was not done and started licking at him as well. “Owww that hurts!” It was far rougher than he expected!
“It means she likes you.” He glared at Lan Wangji, who had a tiny smile on his face.
As Wei Wuxian went to move his hair out of his face, he noticed something off about it, “Ah? Lan Zhan, what is-” He got up and went to the first reflective surface he found to look at it.
All braided, with a bunch of flowers in the middle.
Wei Wuxian brought a hand to his mouth, hiding his smile. Though it could not hide his laugh.
He heard the sound of a bell behind him and tried to hold his laugh, control his smiling, hold back the blushing that surely had spread across his whole face, but the moment Lan Wangji touched his shoulder, his legs faltered for a moment.
“Wei Ying,” He nodded, using the cow to keep his balance. His laugh was as nervous as it was infatuated. How was it possible to feel so much for someone? Even fear, something he never heard associated with actual… The actual thing, it was part of the emotions swarming Wei Wuxian’s head. “Let’s go back inside.”
He nodded, taking the reins and forcing all of these emotions under control. Or as under control as he felt possible. “Okay, yeah, sure… And What about the cow?”
Lan Wangji looked at the animal, who once again tried to lick his hair. “Keep her?”
“Lan Zhan! Where did you even find her?!” No answer. Just a blank stare. And the cow licking at Lan Wangji’s clothes, as his hair was out of bounds. Wei Wuxian felt his heart clenching at the scene. “Fine! Fine, but she will need a name!” He sniffed. Not going to burst right now.
“… She helped you get better, from last night.” Wei Wuxian nodded, wincing a bit at the stab in his heart. Damn curse. She reached with her tongue out again, this time towards Wei Wuxian. “And she likes us.”
He laughed, pushing her a little away from him. “Yeah, that she does,” He couldn’t help the constricting feeling on his chest. Gods, the things he said to Lan Zhan, he couldn’t hope to forgive himself.
The cow then decided to throw her head back and kick and nothing, pushing them closer together to avoid her little tantrum. And then laid her head on Lan Wangji’s shoulder, reaching with her tongue towards Wei Wuxian to lick at him.
“Bao Ai.” Lan Wangji said.
And why. Why out of all times, Wei Wuxian lost all control over his tears.
He said horrible, terrible things to Lan Wangji, basically told him to permanently fuck off, wouldn’t stop screaming… And when morning came, when the curse was no longer in effect, he still choose to ignore Lan Wangji, choose to turn his nose at him, choose to treat him horribly.
And yet, when night fell, Lan Wangji, drunk out of his mind, stole a whole cow, got a basket, and filled it with only flowers that represented This. Them. Them, and all they had, and he covered the cow in these flowers, got Wei Wuxian to do the same, with him.
Who was to blame him for crying. Who was to blame Wei Wuxian for shedding tears then, when the one thing he didn’t dare say about them was proven to be the truth? Who was to blame Wei Wuxian for a moment of weakness when face with- With-
“It- It’s great, yeah- Bao Ai, it’s-” He couldn’t finish. He could barely think at that moment. "Fits. Fits just right,"
And Lan Wangji stuck by his side. As Wei Wuxian finally let the tears go, finally hugged him, finally spilled his regrets, finally let go, finally stopped holding back, finally, finally,
Wei Wuxian dared to let himself actually fall in love.
He had one stubborn man and a Precious Treasure to thank for it.