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Olivia sighed as she saw the latest announcement, 'Flight to NY delayed due to weather', she cursed under her breath, leaning back in the uncomfortable airport chair. She had gone to Iowa for information on a case, per request by Chief Dodds, even as she tried to argue because Christmas was just around the corner and she had already taken the week off for the holiday.
Now, two days before Christmas, Christmas Eve-Eve as her son liked to call it, she was stuck in Iowa because of a snow storm. Olivia pulled her phone out to update Lucy, asking her to apologise to Noah for her. She stood from her seat and walked to the McDonald's to get a coffee, she knew it wouldn't be good, but she needed something to keep her sane.
Olivia sipped her coffee as she watched the snow fall outside the large window. All of the flights were delayed, so there weren't any planes coming in or out. She had a bad feeling that she wasn't going to make it back to New York for Christmas. She waited the hour and luckily, they finally allowed them to start boarding the flight. She stood in line waiting to hand her ticket to the attendant when she saw a man she had tried to forget about. Rafael Barba. A few people ahead of her, she could clearly see it was him. His hair, his shape, and when he thanked the woman as he stepped in to board, she knew it was his voice.
Rafael had been gone for almost two years. He hadn't ever attempted to reach out to her, and Liv tried not to admit it, but it hurt, because of every man she ever allowed into her life, he was the one she was certain wouldn't walk away from her her. And yet, when it got hard, he left New York, left the DA's office, but overall, left her.
She blinked when she realized she was next, she handed the woman her ticket and then stepped onto the walkway, ready to finally get onto the flight and get home to her son. Olivia looked down at her ticket to find her seat. Her seat was 6B, so she walked down the aisle and stopped in her tracks. Just her luck, she would be sitting next to none other than Rafael Barba. To be honest, she didn't know how to feel. The first year he was gone, all she wanted was to see him again. And then she finally started to come to terms with the fact he was gone, so she stopped hoping for it, and eventually her sadness melted into anger. And now, seeing him again when she was kind of expecting to never see him again (she knew that was wishful thinking), she didn't know how to feel. He had been her best friend, and now she felt like she didn't know him.
Olivia put her carry on in the area above the seat, which caught Barba's attention. He looked up from his phone, "Liv." He breathed out.
"Hey, Barba." She said, and she could see the way he cringed at the use of his surname. During their last year working together she had strayed away from Barba. It was always Rafael, or if they were alone, Rafa.
Liv sat down beside him. They sat in silence for the thirty min before take off. The flight attendant came over the speaker giving them all instructions about what to do in case of emergency, and then they were all instructed to buckle their seatbelts for take off. Once they were in the air, Barba started to make conversation. "How have you been?" Olivia shifted uncomfortably in her seat.
"I've been ok. You? Where have you been?" She asked out of curiosity. Part of her needed to know where he had disappeared to.
"Iowa, the election is next year, I've been working election fraud, trying to prep for November." He explained. So many times he had wanted to call her. His finger had hovered over her contact in his phone, yet he never had. Rafael was never sure whether she would want to hear from him. "What were you doing in Iowa?" He asked.
"Our chief asked me to come follow a lead. I shouldn't have come. I'm trying to make it home to Noah as fast as possible." She said, falling into the normalcy of their conversations. The times where she would open up completely to him and he would listen and offer whatever sounding advice he had.
He smiled sadly. "How is he?"
"Good, he's taking dance classes now. He's loving it." She smiled, thinking of her son, how proud of him she was. But it reminded her of all the times Noah had asked if his Uncle Rafa could come to one of his recitals, and then the disappointment when she told him that he wouldn't he making it. "He misses you." She added.
"I miss him too. He's a good kid, Liv."
She nodded, leaning back against the seat, as he turned to look out the window. They sat in silence, it wasn't exactly awkward, but it definitely wasn't comfortable either. She hated how good it felt to talk to him again. Those familiar butterflies in her stomach reminded her that those feelings she had refused to acknowledge were still there.
About 45 minutes into the flight, the flight attendant came back over the speaker to announce that they would be laying over in Indiana due to whether. "There will be a plane there that has a few open seats, the seats will be given on a first come, first serve basis. The first people who bought tickets for this flight will receive a seat on the plane. Those people are as follows: Casey Mallows, Ryan Lanskey, Kimberly Silva, Rafael Barba, Angelique Rhodes, and Bryan and Rachel Horst. Sorry for the inconvenience."
"Damnit." Liv cursed. She was going to be even more late getting home to Noah. All she wanted was to cuddle up with her boy and watch Christmas movies while drinking hot chocolate. She didn't want to be stuck in Indiana on Christmas Eve.
When the flight landed in Indiana, she turned to Rafael. "It was good to see you again. Don't be a stranger, Barba." She said, and she didn't give him a chance to respond before she started to make her way off the plane. She went straight to the desk, "I need a ticket for the soonest flight to New York."
"We have a flight that leaves tomorrow morning at 8:00." The woman said, looking up from her computer.
Olivia sighed, "Ok, that's fine."
"Name?"
"Olivia Benson." The woman behind the desk typed into the computer, then looked up.
"It looks like you're already booked for the 7:00 flight. A Mr.Barba requested his ticked be given to you." Olivia tried to comprehend what she was hearing. Rafael had given up his seat on the plane so that she could get home to Noah.
"Oh ok. Thank you." Olivia said, making her way to the terminal, hoping to run into Rafael on the way, but she couldn't find him anywhere. She boarded her flight, happy now that she would be home in two hours. Noah would already be in bed, but she'd see him in the morning. And they would spend Christmas together. That was all she needed. And she owed it to Rafael.
The flight went by quick, and before she knew it, she was in a cab on the way to her apartment. When she made it home, she sent a text to Rafael .
O: Thanks for the seat. It means a lot. If you're in New York for Christmas, you should stop by my apartment, Noah would love to see you.
He responded a few minutes later and she found herself smiling at her phone.
R: It was the least I could do, I owed you an apology. If you're sure, I'd like that. Have a good night, Liv. I'll see you on Christmas.
Maybe they still had a chance, she thought, as she tried to fall asleep. The next morning, she woke up to Noah jumping on her bed. "Mama!" He exclaimed, tackling her in a hug.
"Good morning, my sweet boy!" She said, hugging him back, silently thanking Rafael for giving her this opportunity to be home with her son. It was 8:00 so she knew Rafael would be boarding the flight to New York now, so she didn't bother texting him another thank you. She would just tell him on Christmas. "Guess who's coming to see you on Christmas?" She asked her son.
"Santa!"
"Well, yes, but there's someone else." She explained and Noah cocked his head to the side in confusion. "Uncle Rafa's coming!" Noah immediately started bouncing up and down on the bed, chanting his honorary Uncle's name.
They got out of bed, and Olivia made cinnamon rolls for breakfast before sitting on the couch to watch the news as she sipped her coffee. The news was broadcasting a plane crash, and when she heard what they said, her heart dropped. "A plane that departed from Indiana this morning was en route to New York, when troubles with the engine caused the pilot to lose some control. He was able to steer the plane down to the ground, but unfortunately, the crash killed 64 of the passengers, the other 36 are in critical condition. More updates on this story, coming up."
Rafael was on that flight. Olivia choked on a sob. She didn't know what to do, she needed to know if he was alive. She paced the living room, Noah asking her if she was ok, but it was all radio static at this point. Olivia pulled up a number that she hadn't used in forever. Lucia Barba. She assumed Rafael was going to New York to spend Christmas with his mother, maybe she had heard something. Pick up, pick up, she prayed. The phone rang a few times before clicking through.
"Mrs.Barba, have you heard about Rafael." She asked in a rush.
"He's alive." Olivia let out a breath. "They're transporting him to Mercy Hospital by helicopter. I'm on my way there now." Lucia said in a rush, the tears evident in her voice. Olivia thanked Lucia then hung up, calling Lucy to come watch Noah. She quickly got dressed and then when Lucy arrived to ran out the door, getting in her SUV, turning on the sirens so she could get to the hospital faster.
When she arrived, she saw Lucia in the waiting room. She ran over as the older woman noticed her. "They took him back. They took him into surgery. He's not likely to make it." Her voice faltered at the end as she fell forward. Tears slipped down Olivia's cheeks as she tried to process what was happening, she thought they still had a chance. And now, he might not even make it.
Olivia sat there in silence with Lucia. They waited for two hours before a doctor came out. "Family of Rafael Barba." Lucia stood up, and Olivia listened carefully, praying he was still alive. She couldn't lose him. "He made it through surgery. He's got broken ribs, a broken arm and leg, a concussion, and first degree burns all over his body. He's not out of the woods, but if he makes it, he has a long road of recovery ahead of him." A weight seemed to be lifted off of Olivia's shoulder's as she leaned back against the waiting room chair, letting her head drop into her hands, fingers raking through her hair as she shuddered out a breath. She was pulled out of her reverie when she felt a hand on her shoulder, she looked up at the tear stained face of Lucia.
"They're letting me go back to see him. You could flash your badge and come back with me." She suggested, the motherly tone in her voice comforting Olivia. "He's unconscious right now, but I'm sure he'd love to see you when he wakes up." Olivia nodded and followed his mother and the doctor down the hall to Rafael's room of the ICU.
When she stepped in, the breath caught in her throat. He was scratched and bruised all over. One of his legs was propped up as was one of his arms. He had a neck brace on and a breathing tube in his nose. He was connected to tons of machines and she immediately felt so sympathetic for him. Not pity. Never pity. Rafael would scoff at her if she ever said she pitied him.
Lucia walked over to his bedside, pulling up a chair and grabbing his hand of the non broken arm. She bowed her head and Olivia could tell she was praying, and while she didn't do it often, Olivia found herself kneeling by his bedside, holding Lucia's other hand and saying her own prayer as well. When they were done, Lucia stayed in the chair and Olivia returned to stand in the corner of the room, watching mother take care of her son. She ran her hand over his forehead, brushing his hair back as she sighed. "He never stopped talking about you." She said, not peeling her eyes away from Rafael. "Even after he left and you two didn't talk much. He always talked about you. He loves you, Olivia. I know that should be something he tells you, but if he never gets the chance, that's something you should hear." Lucia said, and Olivia felt the tears return to her eyes. She knew, deep down, she knew he had loved her for a while. But to hear his mother assert it as he laid helpless in a hospital bed, she felt as if her heart was being torn apart.
"I love him too." She choked out, gazing at him, the rise and fall of his chest the only thing keeping her sane.
Eventually, Lucia stepped out to get them both coffee, and Olivia took the seat she had been sitting in. She carefully took his hand and brought it to her lips, pressing a soft kiss to the burnt skin. She felt a light squeeze to her hand and looked up as his eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the light in the room. "Rafa." She breathed out, he turned his head, his eyes widening at the sight of her.
"Liv, what are you doing here?" He whispered, wincing as the pain his body was in registered. She immediately went to hit the call button for his nurse, but he stopped her. "No, I just want to be with you for a moment." She nodded, settling back into the chair.
"I had to be here. Rafa, I was so worried." The tears streamed down her cheeks, and even through his pain, he lifted his hand and wiped the tears away.
"I'll be ok." He assured her and she nodded. "Is my mom here?"
"She's hasn't left your bedside for a second. She stepped out to get us coffee, but she's going to be royally pissed at you when she finds out you decided to wake up the one time she leaves your side." He laughed softly, the small laugh hurting his ribs. He closed his eyes to steer the pain away and then pulled them open to look at Olivia. "She told me that you love me." She stated hesitantly, his look became serious.
"I do, Liv. I love you."
"I love you, too." She said, cupping his cheek. "But just so you know, you are never getting on a plane again."
"Noted."